Page 3 of 6 FirstFirst 123456 LastLast
Results 51 to 75 of 146
  1. #51
    We've got a job to do. Darth_Pelican's Avatar
    Location
    New Orleans
    Post Count
    8,192
    NBA Team
    New Orleans Pelicans
    College
    LSU Tigers
    I say this with all sincerity, I hope you get shanked by a prisoner and die today.

  2. #52
    Cinnamon Girl mrsmaalox's Avatar
    Name
    Yvonne
    Location
    San Antonio, Texas
    Post Count
    17,464
    NBA Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    How old are your kids? I'm not defending her but it's possible you misinterpreted the "I want full custody because I want child support" statement and she may have really been saying that she doesn't trust you to support the kids unless you have been ordered by a court to do it. Just putting that out there. Like others have said, unless you've got some pretty bad stuff on your history getting joint custody is a given, going for primary in either of your cases will be difficult.

  3. #53
    Can you handle the truth? JoeyGreco's Avatar
    Post Count
    41
    NBA Team
    Los Angeles Lakers
    She's probably fooling around.
    I can help find out.

  4. #54
    silverblk mystix
    Guest
    Shes a for wanting freedom bc she made a commitment thru marriage, and/or having kids. Now shes reneging on that?

    I definitely dont NEED her to be happy. But she sure did help, obviously I loved her enough to start a family and promise to spend my life with her so that type of person would make me happy. I was angry more than anything...mostly bc Now kids gotta be yet another group of kids of whom dont live with both parents all bc mommy wanted to "free"
    Listen man, I'm not trying to be insulting and believe me I have been through these situations before. If you can stand to be honest--really brutally honest here- it has more to do with your hurt and pain than with the kids predicament. It is ok - all of us think about our own welfare first. Not saying you don't care for your kids or that you aren't looking out for them, but it still has MORE to do with your pain talking than the kids and where they will end up.

    The part about getting a lawyer and preparing to go to war is nothing but wasted energy, money and a reason to try and escape your pain and addiction to another person by punishing. In the end all that stuff is meaningless. Teach your kids that life is bigger than trying to possess people and that you wish their mother all the love in the world- now and in the future.

    Teach them that people make choices and everyone will have to live with the consequences of their choices. You made a choice to believe that this person would never leave (not reality- but a fantasy--married or not) and now you are paying for the consequences of this choice.

    Their mother made a choice to seek a different life and somewhere down the road she will have to face consequences regarding this decision, etc.

    Teach them that they are still free to love both their parents and that you guys will have a strong love and a good life together and be stronger for this experience. Of course- if she ever comes crawling back- there is absolutely nothing wrong if you decide that YOUR future lies elsewhere and with someone else. The kids will then understand that you also exercised your right to choose something that was beneficial to you.

  5. #55
    Believe.
    Post Count
    687
    NBA Team
    Los Angeles Lakers
    y'all gotta prenup? if she get yo house it gon be a game changer. men gotta disadvantage so ya need ta pile on any evidence you can get that she ever was like in around n only wants child support. get kids on yo side so they cancel out all da crying she might pull off in court.

    if ya get a female lawyer that not sexist then it a plus. best you probably can do is joint wit primary if ya keep yo house, but if ya can get bombs evidence against her bein unfit wife/mother ya might get full

  6. #56
    Monuments DisAsTerBot's Avatar
    Location
    austin
    Post Count
    3,140
    NBA Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    y'all gotta prenup? if she get yo house it gon be a game changer. men gotta disadvantage so ya need ta pile on any evidence you can get that she ever was like in around n only wants child support. get kids on yo side so they cancel out all da crying she might pull off in court.

    if ya get a female lawyer that not sexist then it a plus. best you probably can do is joint wit primary if ya keep yo house, but if ya can get bombs evidence against her bein unfit wife/mother ya might get full
    listen to this guy. He sounds like a lawyer, tbh

  7. #57
    silverblk mystix
    Guest
    I say this with all sincerity, I hope you get shanked by a prisoner and die today.

    That is not possible...I died a long, long time ago. You can't kill something that has already died but how could you ever understand these things when you are still asleep?

  8. #58
    Controversy Koolaid_Man's Avatar
    Post Count
    41,430
    NBA Team
    Los Angeles Lakers
    College
    Army Black Knights
    said she wants her freedom.


    Hi my friend...here's the deal let Kool translate freedom for you...are you ready...ok here it goes...."Hey honey I meet someone with a Big Black ."

    Sorry Spur fan...but don't be this guy:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3jiYMGfqmlA

  9. #59
    Veteran cantthinkofanything's Avatar
    Post Count
    14,937
    NBA Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    Listen man, I'm not trying to be insulting and believe me I have been through these situations before.
    Regulating prison love triangles is not the same thing.

  10. #60
    Believe.
    Post Count
    687
    NBA Team
    Los Angeles Lakers
    listen to this guy. He sounds like a lawyer, tbh
    nah ima in da aerospace engineering sector

  11. #61
    Controversy Koolaid_Man's Avatar
    Post Count
    41,430
    NBA Team
    Los Angeles Lakers
    College
    Army Black Knights
    y'all gotta prenup? if she get yo house it gon be a game changer. men gotta disadvantage so ya need ta pile on any evidence you can get that she ever was like in around n only wants child support. get kids on yo side so they cancel out all da crying she might pull off in court.

    if ya get a female lawyer that not sexist then it a plus. best you probably can do is joint wit primary if ya keep yo house, but if ya can get bombs evidence against her bein unfit wife/mother ya might get full
    Regarding OJ Simpson: "Now I ain't saying he shoulda killed her..... BUT I UNDERSTAND"

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J8TqhBIEbWA

  12. #62
    Believe.
    Post Count
    687
    NBA Team
    Los Angeles Lakers
    Regarding OJ Simpson: "Now I ain't saying he shoulda killed her..... BUT I UNDERSTAND"

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J8TqhBIEbWA
    that foo got away wit murder n just walk back into jail

  13. #63
    Banned
    Name
    D-Steve
    Location
    Oak Cliff
    Post Count
    5,870
    NBA Team
    Dallas Mavericks
    College
    Texas A&M Aggies
    Is said chick Mexican?

  14. #64
    Controversy Koolaid_Man's Avatar
    Post Count
    41,430
    NBA Team
    Los Angeles Lakers
    College
    Army Black Knights
    that foo got away wit murder n just walk back into jail
    ^ It's understandable that he's back in jail..face it..if you sliced off the head of a white woman and her boyfriend and got away with it..you'd think you were invisible too...

  15. #65
    Cinnamon Girl mrsmaalox's Avatar
    Name
    Yvonne
    Location
    San Antonio, Texas
    Post Count
    17,464
    NBA Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    that's not possible with kids involved
    exactly, any woman that gets her own too small place, and leaves her children behind obviously don't care that much about them any mother here would attest to that.
    Sure, it is possible and furthermore it is a great opportunity to teach the kids a big lesson. Show them that marriage and/or relationships are not a prison and that life changes, people change-- everything changes. Teach them that you will always respect their mother and if she needs to be free - teach them that you wish her the best and that the kids should always live their lives freely and allow people they love to be free also.

    Love isn't found in a relationship where you are basically telling the other person, "if you act in ways that I approve of--then I will love you...once you act in ways I don't approve of- then I don't love you anymore." This is not love.

    Teach the kids that if they are strong and independent that they will never be held hostage by someone else and that they never , ever need to hold someone hostage in order to be loved.
    I gotta give this one to TW---the "lessons" you want to teach the kids are too complicated for the maturity level of a kid under the age of about 16 or 17. However, the impressions and feelings younger kids will grow up with will stay and effect them forever. I have a very negative view of single/divorced mothers because of these "lessons" and examples they try give too young children. If your marriage is toxic, by all means get out, make a life for yourself and make the kids your focus until they are old enough to survive without you. Then find someone who makes you happy. But these women who decide to date or find someone while they have kids dependent on them are ultimately teaching them that if you get out of a bad situation, then you need to find someone to put you back in a good situation----you are worthless unless someone else is making you happy. And kids who have been thru a divorce, no doubt hear their moms telling them how wonderful her life is as long as she has them and that they are her life----then she goes off to find a man and the kids are left with "What? We aren't enough for her anymore? We aren't good enough?" Their mom's end up looking pretty desperate in their eyes. No woman should put her children near any man who likes them or accepts them as part of a package deal----she needs to be absolutely positive that he loves them as much or even more than he loves her or the risk just isn't worth it; they will always deep down view their mom as a pathetic soul who chose the over them.
    Last edited by mrsmaalox; 10-25-2012 at 11:07 AM.

  16. #66
    silverblk mystix
    Guest
    I gotta give this one to TW---the "lessons" you want to teach the kids are too complicated for the maturity level of a kid under the age of about 16 or 17. However, the impressions and feelings younger kids will grow up with will stay and effect them forever. I have a very negative view of single/divorced mothers because of these "lessons" and examples they try give too young children. If your marriage is toxic, by all means get out, make a life for yourself and make the kids your focus until they are old enough to survive without you. Then find someone who makes you happy. But these women who decide to date or find someone while they have kids dependent on them are ultimately teaching them that if you get out of a bad situation, then you need to find someone to put you back in a good situation----you are worthless unless someone else is making you happy. And kids who have been thru a divorce, no doubt hear their moms telling them how wonderful her life is as long as she has them and that they are her life----then she goes off to find a man and the kids are left with "What? We aren't enough for her anymore? We aren't good enough?" Their mom's end up looking pretty desperate in their eyes. No woman should put her children near any man who likes them or accepts them as part of a package deal----she needs to be absolutely positive that he loves them as much or even more than he loves her or the risk just isn't worth it; they will always deep down view their mom as a pathetic soul who chose the over them.
    You raised some good points but I was referring to the father staying with the kids- because there was no other choice- and teaching them how life is full of changes and surprises. I wasn't implying that the mom was not at fault, but trying to go to war or to punish or to teach children that they NEED someone to make them happy is more detrimental than helpful.

  17. #67
    noididnot ididnotnothat's Avatar
    Post Count
    1,437
    NBA Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    I gotta give this one to TW---the "lessons" you want to teach the kids are too complicated for the maturity level of a kid under the age of about 16 or 17. However, the impressions and feelings younger kids will grow up with will stay and effect them forever. I have a very negative view of single/divorced mothers because of these "lessons" and examples they try give too young children. If your marriage is toxic, by all means get out, make a life for yourself and make the kids your focus until they are old enough to survive without you. Then find someone who makes you happy. But these women who decide to date or find someone while they have kids dependent on them are ultimately teaching them that if you get out of a bad situation, then you need to find someone to put you back in a good situation----you are worthless unless someone else is making you happy. And kids who have been thru a divorce, no doubt hear their moms telling them how wonderful her life is as long as she has them and that they are her life----then she goes off to find a man and the kids are left with "What? We aren't enough for her anymore? We aren't good enough?" Their mom's end up looking pretty desperate in their eyes. No woman should put her children near any man who likes them or accepts them as part of a package deal----she needs to be absolutely positive that he loves them as much or even more than he loves her or the risk just isn't worth it; they will always deep down view their mom as a pathetic soul who chose the over them.
    Our parents divorced when I was 10 and we lived with our mom and were happy for her when she found love again and she never neglected us. We didn't want her to be alone just for our sake and we didn't feel she ran out looking for a new man. She simply met someone and she re-married and has been for over 20 years.

  18. #68
    Cinnamon Girl mrsmaalox's Avatar
    Name
    Yvonne
    Location
    San Antonio, Texas
    Post Count
    17,464
    NBA Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    Our parents divorced when I was 10 and we lived with our mom and were happy for her when she found love again and she never neglected us. We didn't want her to be alone just for our sake and we didn't feel she ran out looking for a new man. She simply met someone and she re-married and has been for over 20 years.
    I don't think women neglect their kids when they look for someone, it's just showing priorities. And I think most kids are happy when their moms are happy, no matter how it makes them feel inside, because they love her and its too much guilt for a kid to not want their mom to be happy. Your mom sounds to me like one of the rare ones who actually married a man that she was sure would care for you as much as he cared for her, which is the way it should be. I think the long term effects of "being worthless without a man" are definitely more prevalent for young girls.

  19. #69
    Got Woke? DMC's Avatar
    Post Count
    90,829
    NBA Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    The bottom line is homie doesn't want to pay child support on multiple children. I don't blame him, but that's the risk you take when you have kids with someone flaky.

  20. #70
    Got Woke? DMC's Avatar
    Post Count
    90,829
    NBA Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    I don't think women neglect their kids when they look for someone, it's just showing priorities. And I think most kids are happy when their moms are happy, no matter how it makes them feel inside, because they love her and its too much guilt for a kid to not want their mom to be happy. Your mom sounds to me like one of the rare ones who actually married a man that she was sure would care for you as much as he cared for her, which is the way it should be. I think the long term effects of "being worthless without a man" are definitely more prevalent for young girls.
    Being happy is how you're feeling inside. You cannot be happy and be hurting inside at the same time. You might want to believe that your kids aren't torn apart inside and that they don't hate the er you hooked up with, but that's just self appeasement. Those kids hate the step parent for the most part, especially early on. They love mom, but they are in survival mode and that, for kids, means they withdraw to themselves and their siblings. They lose a lot of trust in parents who divorce and eventually blame the one that gets hooked up first.

  21. #71
    Veteran cantthinkofanything's Avatar
    Post Count
    14,937
    NBA Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    I don't think women neglect their kids when they look for someone, it's just showing priorities. And I think most kids are happy when their moms are happy, no matter how it makes them feel inside, because they love her and its too much guilt for a kid to not want their mom to be happy. Your mom sounds to me like one of the rare ones who actually married a man that she was sure would care for you as much as he cared for her, which is the way it should be. I think the long term effects of "being worthless without a man" are definitely more prevalent for young girls.
    IDK. Recently on Parenthood, Sarah (Lauren Graham's character) moved in with Mark without even asking what her son, Drew thought of it. And the only reason she did it was because she felt guilty about kissing another man, Hank (played by Ray Romano). I realize she can't just give up her life because of her son. But he's only months away from going off to college anyway. And because of her up, she selfishly decided to immediately shack up without any consideration for her son's feelings.

  22. #72
    Cinnamon Girl mrsmaalox's Avatar
    Name
    Yvonne
    Location
    San Antonio, Texas
    Post Count
    17,464
    NBA Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    Being happy is how you're feeling inside. You cannot be happy and be hurting inside at the same time. You might want to believe that your kids aren't torn apart inside and that they don't hate the er you hooked up with, but that's just self appeasement. Those kids hate the step parent for the most part, especially early on. They love mom, but they are in survival mode and that, for kids, means they withdraw to themselves and their siblings. They lose a lot of trust in parents who divorce and eventually blame the one that gets hooked up first.
    I agree with you.

  23. #73
    Mr. John Wayne CosmicCowboy's Avatar
    Location
    san antonio
    Post Count
    43,734
    NBA Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    The bottom line is homie doesn't want to pay child support on multiple children. I don't blame him, but that's the risk you take when you have kids with someone flaky.
    If he makes more than her he is still gonna be paying child support even with joint custody.

  24. #74
    Got Woke? DMC's Avatar
    Post Count
    90,829
    NBA Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    If he makes more than her he is still gonna be paying child support even with joint custody.
    I realize that.

  25. #75
    I can live with it JoeChalupa's Avatar
    Location
    Converse, TX
    Post Count
    21,547
    NBA Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    College
    Ohio State Buckeyes
    That sucks. I tell my girls not to depend on any man and get their lives/careers on track and get that college degree. Do as I say and not as I did.

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •