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  1. #51
    #FreeDerp Monostradamus's Avatar
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    apparently it is



    gross tbh
    Can still out-sprint Crissy Ronaldo

  2. #52
    Chillin' like a villain... TampaDude's Avatar
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    Baseball >>>>> Povertyball

  3. #53
    Board Man Comes Home Clipper Nation's Avatar
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    Holy - povertyball s getting BTFO

  4. #54
    Board Man Comes Home Clipper Nation's Avatar
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    Yep. And when they happen, faster than any poorball player on the planet.

    http://m.mlb.com/news/article/155125...ows-off-speed/

    Ronaldo and his projected 4.9 40 time

    "They're great athletes because they jog around
    Prince Fielder runs a projected 4.7 Faster than soccer's top athlete.
    Can still out-sprint Crissy Ronaldo
    Soccer fans be like:


  5. #55
    ಥ﹏ಥ DAF86's Avatar
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    Some top notch level entertainment right here.

  6. #56
    SeaGOAT midnightpulp's Avatar
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    Found some statcast info on another favorite target of the Floptrot crew: Pablo Sandoval.





    Lionel Messi top speed: 20.2mph.


  7. #57
    TheDrewShow is salty lefty's Avatar
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    Some top notch level entertainment right here.
    Holy this is Aushwitz with more calories

  8. #58
    TheDrewShow is salty lefty's Avatar
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    the comments below the video DAF posted

  9. #59
    ಥ﹏ಥ DAF86's Avatar
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    You know the sport is boring as when some of the most popular American shows make fun of it, tbh.




    And then you have the entire SouthPark episode about the kids wanting to lose on porpuse to not having to play baseball. I know the Simpsons made some jokes about soccer too, but that's to be expected. You will never see British or Germans TV shows making fun of soccer for being boring, tbh.

  10. #60
    SeaGOAT midnightpulp's Avatar
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    Prince Fielder runs a projected 4.7 Faster than soccer's top athlete.
    Yep.

    Then prove otherwise, Philo.

    Try and logically argue that naldo would have a faster 40 time than that?

    Here's how split times in the 40 yard typically go for sprinters in the NFL:

    Athlete 1

    10 yd - 1.59
    10-20 - 1.06
    20-40 -- 1.94
    40 yd - 4.59

    Athlete 2

    10 yd - 1.70
    10-20 - 1.05
    20-40 -- 1.95
    40 yd - 4.70

    http://www.strengthcoach.com/public/1744.cfm

    Let's give naldo the 20 yard split time in the first example of 1.94 (.97 seconds per ten yard split). Adding that ten yard split to his 25m (27 yard) time of 3.61 seconds, we get 4.58 seconds. And there's still 3 yards to go. 3 yards is 30% of 10 yards, .97 x .30 = .291 seconds. 4.58 + .291 = 4.871 seconds.

    LOOKS ING GOOD. If anything, the blog I initially listed was probably being kind.

    I await some Philo'ing. Be better if you just dealt with the fact that your soccer hero isn't really all that fast.
    They also tested Ronaldo's (running) vertical leap and it came in at about 30".

    Mike Trout no stepping onto a >5 foot box:


  11. #61
    SeaGOAT midnightpulp's Avatar
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    You know the sport is boring as when some of the most popular American shows make fun of it, tbh.




    And then you have the entire SouthPark episode about the kids wanting to lose on porpuse to not having to play baseball. I know the Simpsons made some jokes about soccer too, but that's to be expected. You will never see British or Germans TV shows making fun of soccer for being boring, tbh.
    Do you always enjoy being wrong?



    Funny. Ayoade's commentary is basically how Americans view soccer. Pass, pass, pass some more, all culminating in what will probably be a tie

  12. #62
    Board Man Comes Home Clipper Nation's Avatar
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    Even soccer fans admit that soccer is boring:

    Soccer is boring. One of the misconceptions non-soccer fans have about soccer fans is that we don’t know this. The classic Simpsons parody of a soccer match — "Fast kickin'! Low scorin'! And ties? You bet!" — hangs on the joke that the game puts Americans to sleep while somehow, bafflingly, driving foreigners wild with excitement. Calling the game for Springfield TV, Kent Brockman practically grinds his teeth with frustration: "Halfback passes to the center … back to the wing … back to the center. Center holds it. Holds it. [Huge sigh.] Holds it." One booth over, the Spanish commentator is going nuts: "Halfback passes to the center! Back to the wing! Back to the center! Center holds it! Holds it!! HOLDS IT!!!"

    It's a great comedy bit, but it's not really accurate as a depiction of soccer culture. Soccer fans know soccer is boring. Soccer fans have seen more soccer than anyone. We're aware that it can be a chore. Fire up Twitter during the average Stoke City-Wigan match and you'll find us making jokes about gouging out our own eyes with wire hangers, about the players forgetting where the goals are, about what would happen if we released a pride of lions onto the pitch. (Answer: The game would still finish 0-0.)

    http://grantland.com/features/brian-...occer-boredom/

    How will povertyball s ever recover?

  13. #63
    SeaGOAT midnightpulp's Avatar
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    Even soccer fans admit that soccer is boring:

    Soccer is boring. One of the misconceptions non-soccer fans have about soccer fans is that we don’t know this. The classic Simpsons parody of a soccer match — "Fast kickin'! Low scorin'! And ties? You bet!" — hangs on the joke that the game puts Americans to sleep while somehow, bafflingly, driving foreigners wild with excitement. Calling the game for Springfield TV, Kent Brockman practically grinds his teeth with frustration: "Halfback passes to the center … back to the wing … back to the center. Center holds it. Holds it. [Huge sigh.] Holds it." One booth over, the Spanish commentator is going nuts: "Halfback passes to the center! Back to the wing! Back to the center! Center holds it! Holds it!! HOLDS IT!!!"

    It's a great comedy bit, but it's not really accurate as a depiction of soccer culture. Soccer fans know soccer is boring. Soccer fans have seen more soccer than anyone. We're aware that it can be a chore. Fire up Twitter during the average Stoke City-Wigan match and you'll find us making jokes about gouging out our own eyes with wire hangers, about the players forgetting where the goals are, about what would happen if we released a pride of lions onto the pitch. (Answer: The game would still finish 0-0.)

    http://grantland.com/features/brian-...occer-boredom/

    How will povertyball s ever recover?
    Yeah, I've read that article before.

    That said, I also think the "it's boring!" argument against any sport is rather shallow. As a lover of sports, I'm sure you will agree. I can find something to appreciate in all sports. My main issues with soccer are: how disproportional a penalty awarded in the box is. Here's a game that ends in 0-0 like 10% of the time, and you're essentially giving free goals away for a situation that probably wouldn't have resulted in a goal (i.e. Mexico vs. Holland, 2014 World Cup. One of the worst sporting events I've ever seen). Then there's the Mario Party minigame used to decide major matches. Then there's the diving that still hasn't been effectively policed.

    In addition to that, I also think its scoring structure is less compelling than other sports, as I've went into detail about before.

  14. #64
    Got Woke? DMC's Avatar
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    Take the 4th quarter of most NBA games in the RS (and all quarters of the last 4 years of the Lakers) and you'll get the mid season baseball feeling. All sports have that. Soccer has it from start to finish.

  15. #65
    ಥ﹏ಥ DAF86's Avatar
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    Do you always enjoy being wrong?



    Funny. Ayoade's commentary is basically how Americans view soccer. Pass, pass, pass some more, all culminating in what will probably be a tie
    That's different, those characters are nerdy outcasts. The idea is to show they dislike something everybody else enjoys. The show isn't making fun of soccer, it's making fun of their nerdism, tbh. It would be like the "Big Bang theory" guys getting bored at a football game. Way different than the examples I gave.
    Last edited by DAF86; 03-25-2017 at 04:24 PM.

  16. #66
    Board Man Comes Home Clipper Nation's Avatar
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    Th-That's different, it doesn't count when my favorite "sport" is being made fun of! DELET THIS!
    Povertyball s

  17. #67
    SeaGOAT midnightpulp's Avatar
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    That's different, those characters are nerdy outcasts. The idea is to show they dislike something everybody else enjoys. The show isn't making fun of soccer, it's making fun of their nerdism, tbh. It would be like the "Big Bang theory" guys getting bored at a football game. Way different than the examples I gave.
    I should've white texted your probable response. I knew you were going to go "Um, it's different!" route.

    No. The final layer of the joke is that since these "outcasts" aren't indoctrinated by mainstream society, they can more clearly see the flaws/silliness in something everyone else blindly enjoys. That's why Ayoade's commentary is similar to the Simpson's joke. Americans didn't grow up on soccer culture, weren't indoctrinated into it, so they found the back and forth midfield play boring compared to the Mexican commentator who found each pass the most exciting thing since sliced bread.

    And as I told CN, I think the boring description of any sport is shallow. Ice Hockey, Basketball, Aussie Rules, Rugby makes soccer look static as by comparison. So if action and athleticism are the only things you care about, why are you still watching soccer when those other more "dynamic" sports exist?

    Rhetorical question, obviously.

  18. #68
    Erryday I'm Hustlin' Robz4000's Avatar
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    God damn this thread backfired on divegrass fans

  19. #69
    SeaGOAT midnightpulp's Avatar
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    God damn this thread backfired on divegrass fans
    Their threads always do

    "Pablo Sandoval is fat! Fatbol!"

    *Here's a pic of him running 20mph. About as fast as Messi*

    - crickets -

  20. #70
    Board Man Comes Home Clipper Nation's Avatar
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    God damn this thread backfired on divegrass fans
    These threads always do. Soccer fans should pick a sport to go up against baseball instead of their third-world lawn game if they don't want to get BTFO so hard.

  21. #71
    Klaw apalisoc_9's Avatar
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    That's different, those characters are nerdy outcasts. The idea is to show they dislike something everybody else enjoys. The show isn't making fun of soccer, it's making fun of their nerdism, tbh. It would be like the "Big Bang theory" guys getting bored at a football game. Way different than the examples I gave.
    Take the L mid...

  22. #72
    TB 2 TB Silver&Black's Avatar
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    God damn this thread backfired on divegrass fans
    Don't get too excited over it though. It's really not that hard to do. To on Povertyball fans all you really have to do is show up.

    I've never been a beisbol fan though, but beisbol is 10000x more exciting than kicking a ball around for 90 minutes only for the game to end in a 0-0 tie.

  23. #73
    SeaGOAT midnightpulp's Avatar
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    These threads always do. Soccer fans should pick a sport to go up against baseball instead of their third-world lawn game if they don't want to get BTFO so hard.
    Tic-Tac-Toe would be good. Both have an equal amount of ties

  24. #74
    TB 2 TB Silver&Black's Avatar
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    Tic-Tac-Toe would be good. Both have an equal amount of ties
    "Tic-Tac-Toe" ball

  25. #75
    Erryday I'm Hustlin' Robz4000's Avatar
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    Tic-Tac-Toe would be good. Both have an equal amount of ties

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