The Official "I hate when that happens!" thread

[tlongII]

When I gotta take dump real bad at work and rush into the bathroom, drop trou, and sit only to discover that some ass-hat pissed all over the seat! :madrun

[Sheryl Crow]

I hope you used one of your alloted 3 sheets to wipe that up first.

[stretch]

When I gotta take dump real bad at work and rush into the bathroom, drop trou, and sit only to discover that some ass-hat pissed all over the seat! :madrun

[Vinnie_Johnson]

When I gotta take dump real bad at work and rush into the bathroom, drop trou, and sit only to discover that some ass-hat pissed all over the seat! :madrun

What kind of low lifes do you work with?

[Viva Las Espuelas]

first of all why do you sit with out first wiping the seat. secondly and most importantly why are you sitting bare assed on a public seat?! that's disgusting. use an ass gasket. if not, then make that paper triangle. nasty ass. you probably don't wash your hands when you're done.

[BacktoBasics]

This is why you have herpes dude

[PakiDan]

:lol:lol

I used to take a dump every morning at 9am on the dot while working at the AT&T Center. I would go down to the charter member section because it was always empty and the bathrooms were more private... well, one morning I go to do my usual 9 o'clock routine ... I'm sitting in the stall and I had just released my first steamer when I hear someone walk into the bathroom. There were several empty stalls down the line, but the ass clown chooses the stall next to mine. He sits down and within seconds releases the loudest, earth rumbling flatulence I have ever heard, followed by a splash that had to get his nuts thoroughly wet. I tried my hardest to hold it, but I had to release a quick laugh. I then heard a voice that I thought sounded extremely familiar to me. Could it be??? Nooo..... I kind of benty down a little to get the best peak I could under the stall... and I see the biggest pair of shoes I have ever seen with yellow shorts resting, crumpled on top of them. Right when I finally tell myself... no... it can't be... I see a huge hand reach down under the stall and the same voice asks, "Hey man... can you throw me a little paper?" At this point I'm giddy... could it be I am taking a dump right next to Shaq!? I reach over pull one of the rolls off and hand it to him. He says "Thanks a million, man!" I ask ,"Shaq?". He answers, "Yes..". He goes on to explain that Rick Fox "blew up" the locker room bathroom and he just wanted to take a dump without vomiting, so being that the AT&T center (Then SBC Center) was virtually empty, he wandered over to the 'good' bathrooms. So there you have it... the story of how I took a dump with Shaq.

[stretch]

:lol:lol

I used to take a dump every morning at 9am on the dot while working at the AT&T Center. I would go down to the charter member section because it was always empty and the bathrooms were more private... well, one morning I go to do my usual 9 o'clock routine ... I'm sitting in the stall and I had just released my first steamer when I hear someone walk into the bathroom. There were several empty stalls down the line, but the ass clown chooses the stall next to mine. He sits down and within seconds releases the loudest, earth rumbling flatulence I have ever heard, followed by a splash that had to get his nuts thoroughly wet. I tried my hardest to hold it, but I had to release a quick laugh. I then heard a voice that I thought sounded extremely familiar to me. Could it be??? Nooo..... I kind of benty down a little to get the best peak I could under the stall... and I see the biggest pair of shoes I have ever seen with yellow shorts resting, crumpled on top of them. Right when I finally tell myself... no... it can't be... I see a huge hand reach down under the stall and the same voice asks, "Hey man... can you throw me a little paper?" At this point I'm giddy... could it be I am taking a dump right next to Shaq!? I reach over pull one of the rolls off and hand it to him. He says "Thanks a million, man!" I ask ,"Shaq?". He answers, "Yes..". He goes on to explain that Rick Fox "blew up" the locker room bathroom and he just wanted to take a dump without vomiting, so being that the AT&T center (Then SBC Center) was virtually empty, he wandered over to the 'good' bathrooms. So there you have it... the story of how I took a dump with Shaq.

:toast

[remingtonbo2001]

:lol:lol

I used to take a dump every morning at 9am on the dot while working at the AT&T Center. I would go down to the charter member section because it was always empty and the bathrooms were more private... well, one morning I go to do my usual 9 o'clock routine ... I'm sitting in the stall and I had just released my first steamer when I hear someone walk into the bathroom. There were several empty stalls down the line, but the ass clown chooses the stall next to mine. He sits down and within seconds releases the loudest, earth rumbling flatulence I have ever heard, followed by a splash that had to get his nuts thoroughly wet. I tried my hardest to hold it, but I had to release a quick laugh. I then heard a voice that I thought sounded extremely familiar to me. Could it be??? Nooo..... I kind of benty down a little to get the best peak I could under the stall... and I see the biggest pair of shoes I have ever seen with yellow shorts resting, crumpled on top of them. Right when I finally tell myself... no... it can't be... I see a huge hand reach down under the stall and the same voice asks, "Hey man... can you throw me a little paper?" At this point I'm giddy... could it be I am taking a dump right next to Shaq!? I reach over pull one of the rolls off and hand it to him. He says "Thanks a million, man!" I ask ,"Shaq?". He answers, "Yes..". He goes on to explain that Rick Fox "blew up" the locker room bathroom and he just wanted to take a dump without vomiting, so being that the AT&T center (Then SBC Center) was virtually empty, he wandered over to the 'good' bathrooms. So there you have it... the story of how I took a dump with Shaq.

:clap Encore! Encore!

[peewee's lovechild]

:lol:lol

I used to take a dump every morning at 9am on the dot while working at the AT&T Center. I would go down to the charter member section because it was always empty and the bathrooms were more private... well, one morning I go to do my usual 9 o'clock routine ... I'm sitting in the stall and I had just released my first steamer when I hear someone walk into the bathroom. There were several empty stalls down the line, but the ass clown chooses the stall next to mine. He sits down and within seconds releases the loudest, earth rumbling flatulence I have ever heard, followed by a splash that had to get his nuts thoroughly wet. I tried my hardest to hold it, but I had to release a quick laugh. I then heard a voice that I thought sounded extremely familiar to me. Could it be??? Nooo..... I kind of benty down a little to get the best peak I could under the stall... and I see the biggest pair of shoes I have ever seen with yellow shorts resting, crumpled on top of them. Right when I finally tell myself... no... it can't be... I see a huge hand reach down under the stall and the same voice asks, "Hey man... can you throw me a little paper?" At this point I'm giddy... could it be I am taking a dump right next to Shaq!? I reach over pull one of the rolls off and hand it to him. He says "Thanks a million, man!" I ask ,"Shaq?". He answers, "Yes..". He goes on to explain that Rick Fox "blew up" the locker room bathroom and he just wanted to take a dump without vomiting, so being that the AT&T center (Then SBC Center) was virtually empty, he wandered over to the 'good' bathrooms. So there you have it... the story of how I took a dump with Shaq.

Admit it, you just wanted to take a peek of his shlong.

[mrsmaalox]

Great story Pak!!! :lol

[thispego]

:lol:lol

I used to take a dump every morning at 9am on the dot while working at the AT&T Center. I would go down to the charter member section because it was always empty and the bathrooms were more private... well, one morning I go to do my usual 9 o'clock routine ... I'm sitting in the stall and I had just released my first steamer when I hear someone walk into the bathroom. There were several empty stalls down the line, but the ass clown chooses the stall next to mine. He sits down and within seconds releases the loudest, earth rumbling flatulence I have ever heard, followed by a splash that had to get his nuts thoroughly wet. I tried my hardest to hold it, but I had to release a quick laugh. I then heard a voice that I thought sounded extremely familiar to me. Could it be??? Nooo..... I kind of benty down a little to get the best peak I could under the stall... and I see the biggest pair of shoes I have ever seen with yellow shorts resting, crumpled on top of them. Right when I finally tell myself... no... it can't be... I see a huge hand reach down under the stall and the same voice asks, "Hey man... can you throw me a little paper?" At this point I'm giddy... could it be I am taking a dump right next to Shaq!? I reach over pull one of the rolls off and hand it to him. He says "Thanks a million, man!" I ask ,"Shaq?". He answers, "Yes..". He goes on to explain that Rick Fox "blew up" the locker room bathroom and he just wanted to take a dump without vomiting, so being that the AT&T center (Then SBC Center) was virtually empty, he wandered over to the 'good' bathrooms. So there you have it... the story of how I took a dump with Shaq.

since we dont know how it tastes... how does it smell?

[Vinnie_Johnson]

:lol:lol

I used to take a dump every morning at 9am on the dot while working at the AT&T Center. I would go down to the charter member section because it was always empty and the bathrooms were more private... well, one morning I go to do my usual 9 o'clock routine ... I'm sitting in the stall and I had just released my first steamer when I hear someone walk into the bathroom. There were several empty stalls down the line, but the ass clown chooses the stall next to mine. He sits down and within seconds releases the loudest, earth rumbling flatulence I have ever heard, followed by a splash that had to get his nuts thoroughly wet. I tried my hardest to hold it, but I had to release a quick laugh. I then heard a voice that I thought sounded extremely familiar to me. Could it be??? Nooo..... I kind of benty down a little to get the best peak I could under the stall... and I see the biggest pair of shoes I have ever seen with yellow shorts resting, crumpled on top of them. Right when I finally tell myself... no... it can't be... I see a huge hand reach down under the stall and the same voice asks, "Hey man... can you throw me a little paper?" At this point I'm giddy... could it be I am taking a dump right next to Shaq!? I reach over pull one of the rolls off and hand it to him. He says "Thanks a million, man!" I ask ,"Shaq?". He answers, "Yes..". He goes on to explain that Rick Fox "blew up" the locker room bathroom and he just wanted to take a dump without vomiting, so being that the AT&T center (Then SBC Center) was virtually empty, he wandered over to the 'good' bathrooms. So there you have it... the story of how I took a dump with Shaq.


No way :lmao

[PakiDan]

since we dont know how it tastes... how does it smell?

It has kind of a rich 'nutty' quality.

[Mr.Bottomtooth]

:lol:lol

I used to take a dump every morning at 9am on the dot while working at the AT&T Center. I would go down to the charter member section because it was always empty and the bathrooms were more private... well, one morning I go to do my usual 9 o'clock routine ... I'm sitting in the stall and I had just released my first steamer when I hear someone walk into the bathroom. There were several empty stalls down the line, but the ass clown chooses the stall next to mine. He sits down and within seconds releases the loudest, earth rumbling flatulence I have ever heard, followed by a splash that had to get his nuts thoroughly wet. I tried my hardest to hold it, but I had to release a quick laugh. I then heard a voice that I thought sounded extremely familiar to me. Could it be??? Nooo..... I kind of benty down a little to get the best peak I could under the stall... and I see the biggest pair of shoes I have ever seen with yellow shorts resting, crumpled on top of them. Right when I finally tell myself... no... it can't be... I see a huge hand reach down under the stall and the same voice asks, "Hey man... can you throw me a little paper?" At this point I'm giddy... could it be I am taking a dump right next to Shaq!? I reach over pull one of the rolls off and hand it to him. He says "Thanks a million, man!" I ask ,"Shaq?". He answers, "Yes..". He goes on to explain that Rick Fox "blew up" the locker room bathroom and he just wanted to take a dump without vomiting, so being that the AT&T center (Then SBC Center) was virtually empty, he wandered over to the 'good' bathrooms. So there you have it... the story of how I took a dump with Shaq.

That was beautiful.

[Ronaldo McDonald]

:lol:lol

I used to take a dump every morning at 9am on the dot while working at the AT&T Center. I would go down to the charter member section because it was always empty and the bathrooms were more private... well, one morning I go to do my usual 9 o'clock routine ... I'm sitting in the stall and I had just released my first steamer when I hear someone walk into the bathroom. There were several empty stalls down the line, but the ass clown chooses the stall next to mine. He sits down and within seconds releases the loudest, earth rumbling flatulence I have ever heard, followed by a splash that had to get his nuts thoroughly wet. I tried my hardest to hold it, but I had to release a quick laugh. I then heard a voice that I thought sounded extremely familiar to me. Could it be??? Nooo..... I kind of benty down a little to get the best peak I could under the stall... and I see the biggest pair of shoes I have ever seen with yellow shorts resting, crumpled on top of them. Right when I finally tell myself... no... it can't be... I see a huge hand reach down under the stall and the same voice asks, "Hey man... can you throw me a little paper?" At this point I'm giddy... could it be I am taking a dump right next to Shaq!? I reach over pull one of the rolls off and hand it to him. He says "Thanks a million, man!" I ask ,"Shaq?". He answers, "Yes..". He goes on to explain that Rick Fox "blew up" the locker room bathroom and he just wanted to take a dump without vomiting, so being that the AT&T center (Then SBC Center) was virtually empty, he wandered over to the 'good' bathrooms. So there you have it... the story of how I took a dump with Shaq.

Awesome story. But I probably would have told him that I used up all the toilet paper because i can't stand the guy.

[RandomGuy]

I hate it when people post threads about their bowel movements.

[RandomGuy]

:lol:lol

I used to take a dump every morning at 9am on the dot while working at the AT&T Center. I would go down to the charter member section because it was always empty and the bathrooms were more private... well, one morning I go to do my usual 9 o'clock routine ... I'm sitting in the stall and I had just released my first steamer when I hear someone walk into the bathroom. There were several empty stalls down the line, but the ass clown chooses the stall next to mine. He sits down and within seconds releases the loudest, earth rumbling flatulence I have ever heard, followed by a splash that had to get his nuts thoroughly wet. I tried my hardest to hold it, but I had to release a quick laugh. I then heard a voice that I thought sounded extremely familiar to me. Could it be??? Nooo..... I kind of benty down a little to get the best peak I could under the stall... and I see the biggest pair of shoes I have ever seen with yellow shorts resting, crumpled on top of them. Right when I finally tell myself... no... it can't be... I see a huge hand reach down under the stall and the same voice asks, "Hey man... can you throw me a little paper?" At this point I'm giddy... could it be I am taking a dump right next to Shaq!? I reach over pull one of the rolls off and hand it to him. He says "Thanks a million, man!" I ask ,"Shaq?". He answers, "Yes..". He goes on to explain that Rick Fox "blew up" the locker room bathroom and he just wanted to take a dump without vomiting, so being that the AT&T center (Then SBC Center) was virtually empty, he wandered over to the 'good' bathrooms. So there you have it... the story of how I took a dump with Shaq.

Ok, so I don't hate this thread as much as I did three minutes ago. :lol

Worth logging in to ST right there.

[ashbeeigh]

:lol:lol

I used to take a dump every morning at 9am on the dot while working at the AT&T Center. I would go down to the charter member section because it was always empty and the bathrooms were more private... well, one morning I go to do my usual 9 o'clock routine ... I'm sitting in the stall and I had just released my first steamer when I hear someone walk into the bathroom. There were several empty stalls down the line, but the ass clown chooses the stall next to mine. He sits down and within seconds releases the loudest, earth rumbling flatulence I have ever heard, followed by a splash that had to get his nuts thoroughly wet. I tried my hardest to hold it, but I had to release a quick laugh. I then heard a voice that I thought sounded extremely familiar to me. Could it be??? Nooo..... I kind of benty down a little to get the best peak I could under the stall... and I see the biggest pair of shoes I have ever seen with yellow shorts resting, crumpled on top of them. Right when I finally tell myself... no... it can't be... I see a huge hand reach down under the stall and the same voice asks, "Hey man... can you throw me a little paper?" At this point I'm giddy... could it be I am taking a dump right next to Shaq!? I reach over pull one of the rolls off and hand it to him. He says "Thanks a million, man!" I ask ,"Shaq?". He answers, "Yes..". He goes on to explain that Rick Fox "blew up" the locker room bathroom and he just wanted to take a dump without vomiting, so being that the AT&T center (Then SBC Center) was virtually empty, he wandered over to the 'good' bathrooms. So there you have it... the story of how I took a dump with Shaq.


Best post ever.

[stretch]

Best post ever.

it was good not the best

[Thunder Dan]

I hate when people piss on the floor by the urinal then I have to stand in it to take a piss

[angel_luv]

it was good not the best

You didn't find it to be full of crap? :lol

[timvp]

When I gotta take dump real bad at work and rush into the bathroom, drop trou, and sit only to discover that some ass-hat pissed all over the seat! :madrunYou probably have aids now.

[mavs>spurs2]

I always look before sitting down..and never sit on the toilet with my bare ass...someone else said it best "toilet paper triangle."

And the Shaq story was great..I needed a good laugh :tu

[IronMexican]

:lol:lol

I used to take a dump every morning at 9am on the dot while working at the AT&T Center. I would go down to the charter member section because it was always empty and the bathrooms were more private... well, one morning I go to do my usual 9 o'clock routine ... I'm sitting in the stall and I had just released my first steamer when I hear someone walk into the bathroom. There were several empty stalls down the line, but the ass clown chooses the stall next to mine. He sits down and within seconds releases the loudest, earth rumbling flatulence I have ever heard, followed by a splash that had to get his nuts thoroughly wet. I tried my hardest to hold it, but I had to release a quick laugh. I then heard a voice that I thought sounded extremely familiar to me. Could it be??? Nooo..... I kind of benty down a little to get the best peak I could under the stall... and I see the biggest pair of shoes I have ever seen with yellow shorts resting, crumpled on top of them. Right when I finally tell myself... no... it can't be... I see a huge hand reach down under the stall and the same voice asks, "Hey man... can you throw me a little paper?" At this point I'm giddy... could it be I am taking a dump right next to Shaq!? I reach over pull one of the rolls off and hand it to him. He says "Thanks a million, man!" I ask ,"Shaq?". He answers, "Yes..". He goes on to explain that Rick Fox "blew up" the locker room bathroom and he just wanted to take a dump without vomiting, so being that the AT&T center (Then SBC Center) was virtually empty, he wandered over to the 'good' bathrooms. So there you have it... the story of how I took a dump with Shaq.

:lol:lol oh godd, that was hilarious.

[JoeChalupa]

:lol:lol

I used to take a dump every morning at 9am on the dot while working at the AT&T Center. I would go down to the charter member section because it was always empty and the bathrooms were more private... well, one morning I go to do my usual 9 o'clock routine ... I'm sitting in the stall and I had just released my first steamer when I hear someone walk into the bathroom. There were several empty stalls down the line, but the ass clown chooses the stall next to mine. He sits down and within seconds releases the loudest, earth rumbling flatulence I have ever heard, followed by a splash that had to get his nuts thoroughly wet. I tried my hardest to hold it, but I had to release a quick laugh. I then heard a voice that I thought sounded extremely familiar to me. Could it be??? Nooo..... I kind of benty down a little to get the best peak I could under the stall... and I see the biggest pair of shoes I have ever seen with yellow shorts resting, crumpled on top of them. Right when I finally tell myself... no... it can't be... I see a huge hand reach down under the stall and the same voice asks, "Hey man... can you throw me a little paper?" At this point I'm giddy... could it be I am taking a dump right next to Shaq!? I reach over pull one of the rolls off and hand it to him. He says "Thanks a million, man!" I ask ,"Shaq?". He answers, "Yes..". He goes on to explain that Rick Fox "blew up" the locker room bathroom and he just wanted to take a dump without vomiting, so being that the AT&T center (Then SBC Center) was virtually empty, he wandered over to the 'good' bathrooms. So there you have it... the story of how I took a dump with Shaq.

I'm sure he had a wide stance but did he tap his feet?

[Thunder Dan]

:lol:lol

I used to take a dump every morning at 9am on the dot while working at the AT&T Center. I would go down to the charter member section because it was always empty and the bathrooms were more private... well, one morning I go to do my usual 9 o'clock routine ... I'm sitting in the stall and I had just released my first steamer when I hear someone walk into the bathroom. There were several empty stalls down the line, but the ass clown chooses the stall next to mine. He sits down and within seconds releases the loudest, earth rumbling flatulence I have ever heard, followed by a splash that had to get his nuts thoroughly wet. I tried my hardest to hold it, but I had to release a quick laugh. I then heard a voice that I thought sounded extremely familiar to me. Could it be??? Nooo..... I kind of benty down a little to get the best peak I could under the stall... and I see the biggest pair of shoes I have ever seen with yellow shorts resting, crumpled on top of them. Right when I finally tell myself... no... it can't be... I see a huge hand reach down under the stall and the same voice asks, "Hey man... can you throw me a little paper?" At this point I'm giddy... could it be I am taking a dump right next to Shaq!? I reach over pull one of the rolls off and hand it to him. He says "Thanks a million, man!" I ask ,"Shaq?". He answers, "Yes..". He goes on to explain that Rick Fox "blew up" the locker room bathroom and he just wanted to take a dump without vomiting, so being that the AT&T center (Then SBC Center) was virtually empty, he wandered over to the 'good' bathrooms. So there you have it... the story of how I took a dump with Shaq.

shenanigans

I think it was really Mark Madsen and you changed the name to make it sound cooler

http://chaunceybillups.blogspot.com/madsen_i.jpg

[Mr.Bottomtooth]

Paki just hijacked this thread.

[Sen. Craig]

Paki just hijacked this thread.

He got off lucky.

[Ronaldo McDonald]

I hate it when you fart, then walk a good distance away (12 - 15 feet) and the smell is still around you.

[slayermin]

:lol:lol

I used to take a dump every morning at 9am on the dot while working at the AT&T Center. I would go down to the charter member section because it was always empty and the bathrooms were more private... well, one morning I go to do my usual 9 o'clock routine ... I'm sitting in the stall and I had just released my first steamer when I hear someone walk into the bathroom. There were several empty stalls down the line, but the ass clown chooses the stall next to mine. He sits down and within seconds releases the loudest, earth rumbling flatulence I have ever heard, followed by a splash that had to get his nuts thoroughly wet. I tried my hardest to hold it, but I had to release a quick laugh. I then heard a voice that I thought sounded extremely familiar to me. Could it be??? Nooo..... I kind of benty down a little to get the best peak I could under the stall... and I see the biggest pair of shoes I have ever seen with yellow shorts resting, crumpled on top of them. Right when I finally tell myself... no... it can't be... I see a huge hand reach down under the stall and the same voice asks, "Hey man... can you throw me a little paper?" At this point I'm giddy... could it be I am taking a dump right next to Shaq!? I reach over pull one of the rolls off and hand it to him. He says "Thanks a million, man!" I ask ,"Shaq?". He answers, "Yes..". He goes on to explain that Rick Fox "blew up" the locker room bathroom and he just wanted to take a dump without vomiting, so being that the AT&T center (Then SBC Center) was virtually empty, he wandered over to the 'good' bathrooms. So there you have it... the story of how I took a dump with Shaq.

:lmao That made my day right there. Great story.

[BigZak]

good shit paki!

[JoeChalupa]

:lmao

[ShoogarBear]

:lol:lol

I used to take a dump every morning at 9am on the dot while working at the AT&T Center. I would go down to the charter member section because it was always empty and the bathrooms were more private... well, one morning I go to do my usual 9 o'clock routine ... I'm sitting in the stall and I had just released my first steamer when I hear someone walk into the bathroom. There were several empty stalls down the line, but the ass clown chooses the stall next to mine. He sits down and within seconds releases the loudest, earth rumbling flatulence I have ever heard, followed by a splash that had to get his nuts thoroughly wet. I tried my hardest to hold it, but I had to release a quick laugh. I then heard a voice that I thought sounded extremely familiar to me. Could it be??? Nooo..... I kind of benty down a little to get the best peak I could under the stall... and I see the biggest pair of shoes I have ever seen with yellow shorts resting, crumpled on top of them. Right when I finally tell myself... no... it can't be... I see a huge hand reach down under the stall and the same voice asks, "Hey man... can you throw me a little paper?" At this point I'm giddy... could it be I am taking a dump right next to Shaq!? I reach over pull one of the rolls off and hand it to him. He says "Thanks a million, man!" I ask ,"Shaq?". He answers, "Yes..". He goes on to explain that Rick Fox "blew up" the locker room bathroom and he just wanted to take a dump without vomiting, so being that the AT&T center (Then SBC Center) was virtually empty, he wandered over to the 'good' bathrooms. So there you have it... the story of how I took a dump with Shaq.


Hokey smokes. Post of the Decade.













At least he didn't ask you how his . . . you know . . .

[ShoogarBear]

And now we know why Vanessa divorced Rick.

[Mr.Bottomtooth]

Hokey smokes. Post of the Decade.













At least he didn't ask you how his . . . you know . . .

:lol