Findog
08-27-2008, 04:41 PM
For some, the upcoming holiday offers up opportunities to visit friends or family out of town, loaf on the couch while watching college football, or backyard barbeques and other leisurely pursuits. Me? I'm going to make some pot brownies.
The traditional method for ingesting marijuana involves huffing down on a bong or pipe, and absorbing the sweet, THC goodness through the lungs. Depending on the strain and potency, the "high" that comes via this method can last up to two hours if you're smoking quality, multi-colored bud that originates from Canada, or as little as 20 minutes if you were unlucky enough to receive Mexican ditch weed. It only takes a small quantity of high-grade marijuana to lead to an altered state, and the high is of a smooth, mellow character, with no paranoia or headaches. Total crap requires lots and lots of leaves and buds to cash into ashes, and it leaves one susceptible to headaches and a firm conviction that the Feds are coming soon to throw your ass into a cornhole prison.
I am happy to report that there is a third way, and it involves indulging your inner Chef Boyardee. Cooking with marijuana involves ingesting the THC through the digestive tract. This has a number of benefits. The first is that heavy pot users sometime inflame and irritate their throats through excessive smoking, so this potentially negative effect is mitigated. The second benefit is that the high that is produced lasts significantly longer than a high produced through smoking. It is not unusual or uncommon for a person who has ingested brownies to report still being high 12-14 hours later, depending on the amount of marijuana used to make the special concoction. The third benefit is that if you're ever saddled with schwag that isn't really worth smoking, it can be salvaged by converting it to use in brownies.
How does one go about cooking with such delicious, nutritional herbs? One method is to make the THC butter, whereby you sautee the marijuana leaves in a pan with a stick of butter, then drain the resultant greenish butter out and use it as you would in any recipe that calls for butter. Thus one is not limited to brownies but could make marijuana cookies, marijuana spaghetti, or marijuana pizza. The possibilities are endless. After sauteeing, the leaves will be bereft of any THC and should be discarded. I tried to make the butter once and was not successful in developing sufficient THC content. The ensuing blueberry muffin loaf didn't do anything other than make me gag as I tried to shove it down my throat.
The solution I came up with was to get a grinding tool from my friendly, local head shop, and systemically de-seed and de-stem the marijuana into fine, light leaves, commonly known as "shake." Then I just threw the leaves into the brownie mix and prepared the dessert normally as the directions on the box instructed. A good rule of thumb is to use half an ounce of regular schwag weed, but with the previous unsuccessful attempt on my mind, I used three-quarters of an ounce. That was a mistake.
I shared the pan of brownies with a friend of mine who was uninitiated into the world of voodoo drug magik cooking, and he reported still feeling high 18 hours later when he had to meet with his boss for his annual performance review. His demeanor in the meeting could best be described as extremely "lethargic" and "disheveled," and he did not get a raise. I myself had to beg off of sexual intercourse with my girlfriend and pleaded to be left alone so I could go "sleep it off."
They say the third time is a charm and I'm determined to get it right this Labor Day Weekend.
The traditional method for ingesting marijuana involves huffing down on a bong or pipe, and absorbing the sweet, THC goodness through the lungs. Depending on the strain and potency, the "high" that comes via this method can last up to two hours if you're smoking quality, multi-colored bud that originates from Canada, or as little as 20 minutes if you were unlucky enough to receive Mexican ditch weed. It only takes a small quantity of high-grade marijuana to lead to an altered state, and the high is of a smooth, mellow character, with no paranoia or headaches. Total crap requires lots and lots of leaves and buds to cash into ashes, and it leaves one susceptible to headaches and a firm conviction that the Feds are coming soon to throw your ass into a cornhole prison.
I am happy to report that there is a third way, and it involves indulging your inner Chef Boyardee. Cooking with marijuana involves ingesting the THC through the digestive tract. This has a number of benefits. The first is that heavy pot users sometime inflame and irritate their throats through excessive smoking, so this potentially negative effect is mitigated. The second benefit is that the high that is produced lasts significantly longer than a high produced through smoking. It is not unusual or uncommon for a person who has ingested brownies to report still being high 12-14 hours later, depending on the amount of marijuana used to make the special concoction. The third benefit is that if you're ever saddled with schwag that isn't really worth smoking, it can be salvaged by converting it to use in brownies.
How does one go about cooking with such delicious, nutritional herbs? One method is to make the THC butter, whereby you sautee the marijuana leaves in a pan with a stick of butter, then drain the resultant greenish butter out and use it as you would in any recipe that calls for butter. Thus one is not limited to brownies but could make marijuana cookies, marijuana spaghetti, or marijuana pizza. The possibilities are endless. After sauteeing, the leaves will be bereft of any THC and should be discarded. I tried to make the butter once and was not successful in developing sufficient THC content. The ensuing blueberry muffin loaf didn't do anything other than make me gag as I tried to shove it down my throat.
The solution I came up with was to get a grinding tool from my friendly, local head shop, and systemically de-seed and de-stem the marijuana into fine, light leaves, commonly known as "shake." Then I just threw the leaves into the brownie mix and prepared the dessert normally as the directions on the box instructed. A good rule of thumb is to use half an ounce of regular schwag weed, but with the previous unsuccessful attempt on my mind, I used three-quarters of an ounce. That was a mistake.
I shared the pan of brownies with a friend of mine who was uninitiated into the world of voodoo drug magik cooking, and he reported still feeling high 18 hours later when he had to meet with his boss for his annual performance review. His demeanor in the meeting could best be described as extremely "lethargic" and "disheveled," and he did not get a raise. I myself had to beg off of sexual intercourse with my girlfriend and pleaded to be left alone so I could go "sleep it off."
They say the third time is a charm and I'm determined to get it right this Labor Day Weekend.