RonMexico
10-01-2008, 01:04 PM
I have many theories regarding the physical appearence and everyday activities of the posters in the college forum (i.e. Doug Collins has never had sex), but I want to focus on a specific one today. Yes, we're all back to my favorite target: CaptMike Boone Pickens.
I mean we all know Brutalis is a typical Arkansan (pussy), so it's pretty easy to figure him out, but I think Mike can provide a deeper analysis.
I'll go first:
- Very arrogant; probably hated by most, if not all, of his co-workers.
- Probably extremely overweight. Simple walking is a struggle for him. I mean, we're talking really fucking fat.
- Most likely was that kid who sat in the front of class, asked the teacher a bunch of questions, went to the office hours, and ruined the curve for everyone while farting and laughing.
- Most likely married, then impregnated the first girl who would speak to him. She is also not attractive.
- Spends his Saturdays dressed in orange and sitting around with his family, eating, shitting, and talking smack about every school on television.
- Secretly masturbates to pictures of Bob Stoops.
- Publicly masturbates to pictures of Bobby Reid.
- Drives an Accord Hybrid and tells everyone how awesome it is and acts like he's saving the environment... always offers to drive at work so he can show off the electric motor. His co-workers often decline.
- Reads every single Oklahoma newspaper online for any positive mention of Oklahoma State and any negative mention of Texas A&M. Thinks this makes him smarter.
I mean we all know Brutalis is a typical Arkansan (pussy), so it's pretty easy to figure him out, but I think Mike can provide a deeper analysis.
I'll go first:
- Very arrogant; probably hated by most, if not all, of his co-workers.
- Probably extremely overweight. Simple walking is a struggle for him. I mean, we're talking really fucking fat.
- Most likely was that kid who sat in the front of class, asked the teacher a bunch of questions, went to the office hours, and ruined the curve for everyone while farting and laughing.
- Most likely married, then impregnated the first girl who would speak to him. She is also not attractive.
- Spends his Saturdays dressed in orange and sitting around with his family, eating, shitting, and talking smack about every school on television.
- Secretly masturbates to pictures of Bob Stoops.
- Publicly masturbates to pictures of Bobby Reid.
- Drives an Accord Hybrid and tells everyone how awesome it is and acts like he's saving the environment... always offers to drive at work so he can show off the electric motor. His co-workers often decline.
- Reads every single Oklahoma newspaper online for any positive mention of Oklahoma State and any negative mention of Texas A&M. Thinks this makes him smarter.