I found a cucumber under my sons bed!

[Shelly.]

I was cleaning his room and checked under the bed for his other shoe and I saw a rather large cucumber.

Should I be worried, or am I over reacting?

[anakha]

Not touching this one with a ten-foot pole.

[Viva Las Espuelas]

it depends. what does it taste like?

[TDMVPDPOY]

we all know its yours shelly...

[Shelly.]

I knew this was a bad idea. I was just so worried and i had to much to drink. I will delete this topic, I had no idea who else to turn to.

[IronMexican]

I thought this was seriously her till I read the post count.

[Salad Tosser]

Finally a topic I can contribute to. Don't worry about the cucumber under the bed ,check for ranch dressing on his chin!

[pickle girl]

This topic is leaving a sour taste in my mouth.

[Shaolin-Style]

Hes gay. Or bisexual. Obviously.

[J-Rock6X]

Not touching this one with a ten-foot pole.

.........or a 10 foot cucumber! :nope

[Xylus]

Nothing wrong with some good ol-fashioned sodomy at that age.

[I. Hustle]

Really check it out. What they do is hollow it out and then they put in a screen and smoke their weed out of it.

Or it could be that he is eating his fruit and vegetables and doesn't want anyone to know about it.

[BacktoBasics]

lol great troll you had me until I looked closer. Keep up the good work.

[I. Hustle]

Here is how it went from his perspective. ( I am going to go with ten years old because... well I want to)


Ugh another day at school. I f'n hate this shit. I hope mom made an actual breakfast and didn't just pour syrup over some cold pop tarts again. I hope she stops drinking.
I better hurry so I can make it to the garden on the way to school. If she catches me again she'll make me drink some of those old beers that my "uncles" left in the living room. Last time "uncle what's his name put out his cigarettes in the bottle and I know she saw him do it.
(time passes and school is over)
Well I couldn't make it before school but if I run I can make it to the garden on the way home.
YES! I made it! Ok now to find the biggest cucumber. No this one is too small. No not this one either I need one bigger. BOOYAA BITCH I found one. This one has to be at least 13 inches I knew using miracle grow and leftover beer would make a huge one. Now to get it home and stash it before mom sees it.
If I put it under my bed for a few days it has to pickle.
Shelly: Where did that little shit put the other shoe?! That's the last time I by hem new shoes from Walmar.... What the hell is this?! A f'n cucumber!
HEY YOU! Get over here!
Shelly's kid: What's up mom? Oh you found it. It was supposed to be a surprise.
Shelly: Surprise? For who?
Shelly's kid: Well remember when I asked you how come all those different guys come over that you make me call uncle and you said because mommy wants to find the one with the biggest pickle? Well I thought that if I had a bigger pickle than those guys you would spend time with me.
Shelly: Ay yi yi Que lastima. I need a beer.

[florige]

I thought this was seriously her till I read the post count.




+1 :lol

[JoeChalupa]

Damn, first your sister and now your son?

[Twisted_Dawg]

If your son has a girlfriend.........he has a kinky streak!

[MrChug]

I know this is a troll, but let kids do what they want alone...they're going to do it anyway. (okay, maybe ass play is going a bit far but at least the kid's going to find out who he is).

[The Club]

I wonder what Shelly's son would find under her bed?

[The Franchise]

it depends. what does it taste like?

Now that's just nasty. :nope

[thispego]

http://i182.photobucket.com/albums/x2/Garquint/theclub.gif
lol, it looks like this says "The Chub"

[Beno Udrih]

Any updates?

Bet tonight's dinner salad had some kick to it. :wakeup

[MannyIsGod]

http://i182.photobucket.com/albums/x2/Garquint/theclub.gif
lol, it looks like this says "The Chub"

:lmao

[Ed Helicopter Jones]

I wonder what Shelly's son would find under her bed?

Two pairs of shoes, a utility bill statement from 2006, one black sock, a box of receipts, a framed mirror that used to hang on the south wall, and a fair amount of lint.

She really needs to insist that the housekeeper reach further under the bed with the vacuum.

[fotan2]

how old is your son ?

maybe hes trying to collect some ingrdients for a burger .

[mouse]

I wonder what Shelly's son would find under her bed?


And old VHS tape of Top Gun she swore up and down to block buster she returned. a go spurs go flag she tore off her 1997 Honda Accord when the Spurs lost to the Lakers in 2000, her subscription renewal form for O magazine, a half eaten payday bar,and an unopened box of Anthony Robbins cassettes.

http://i3.iofferphoto.com/img/item/509/264/61/9780671582081.jpg

[manufor3]

lol great troll you had me until I looked closer. Keep up the good work.