The Gopher to Retire...

[gophergeorge]

Well, my time has come. Either retire after 21 years of service, or go to Japan for three years and then who knows where.

Anyway, I retire in July.... I need someone who can take my military experience and put it in a CIVLIAN resume..... and I need it by next Friday :)

Anybody know anybody who knows somebody?

[Clandestino]

what is your miltiary experience?

[gophergeorge]

Threat warning; force protection, information operations, etc, etc, etc...

[Clandestino]

army, navy, af? mos?

[bigzak25]

happy retirement man!

[gophergeorge]

AF.... 1N4 (98G in Army speak)

[gophergeorge]

Had an informal interview today with a contractor on Fort Sam.... either that or I'm selling shoes at Payless....

[Clandestino]

AF.... 1N4 (98G in Army speak)

cool. than you are hooked up. i was a 98G... with your experience you can find a lot of nice paying contracting jobs all over the world...even here in san antonio... www.intelligencecareers.com

you'll be snatched up in a few seconds...still hold the TS/SCI i presume?

[tlongII]

Go to Japan.....love you long time...

[gophergeorge]

cool. than you are hooked up. i was a 98G... with your experience you can find a lot of nice paying contracting jobs all over the world...even here in san antonio... www.intelligencecareers.com

you'll be snatched up in a few seconds...still hold the TS/SCI i presume?


Yeppers.... Just had it updated as well...

Lets see how old you are...

QSA IMI QSA IMI

[Clandestino]

oh yeah...and if you are applying to contracting jobs you won't really need to civilianize your resume that much... most contractors are former military..and the skills you'll be doing will usually be the same..

my first job was awesome...one day iwas working in bdu's...two weeks later, same desk, but in civilian clothes making a fuckload more.. it's great!

[CommanderMcBragg]

Congratulations. Enjoy retirement. It's what I do.

[gophergeorge]

Have yet to talk dollars, but it was IMPLIED it would be close to double what I'm making now.... Sweet.

[Clandestino]

i've never heard of anyone making below $65,000 and that is just here in sa... overseas(germany, uk, italy) you usually start at like 80-100... go to places like iraq and you make over 6 six figures easy...

have you had a recent poly? try to get one.. that is another plus... plus let the military pay for it..

[tekdragon]

Congrats and good luck, GG! Welcome to civilian life!

[NameDropper]

Rumor has it you all make some serious jack! I'm not worthy. :oops

Having flat feet sucks.

[tsb2000]

I know how that is. Flat feet cost me an academy appointment. D'oh!

[JoeChalupa]

Kudos GG!!

[Smackie Chan]

Can you drive a Taxi? Congrats I hope now you can smoke weed when we party,,

here fill out this app....> http://www.alamoworksource.org/toyota/default.asp

[MannyIsGod]

lmao @ the toyota app.

[Hook Dem]

Congratulations Gopher! As a citizen of this great country, I want to thank you personally for your dedicated service. I have always had the greatest respect for you and hope you find what you are looking for. Take care friend!

[Taco]

Congrats GG thanks for serving!!!
You Rock!!!!!!

[2Blonde]

Gopher,
I amsending you a Private Message with my phone number. My husband, just recently retired and went through all of this. He said he would be willing to talk to you about it and offer you any help he can.

...2Blonde

[Johnny_Blaze_47]

Congrats, Gopher.

I am glad to have been able to provide you with a picture of Jessica Simpson and will be proud to buy you lunch at Chester's.

[T Park]

Thank you very much for your service Gopher.

People like you make me proud to be an american.

Good luck in future endevors.

[2Blonde]

Gopher,
My husband , who just retired and went through all this said for you to buy "Knock 'Em Dead Resumes" and "Knock 'Em Dead Interviews"


...2Blonde

[desflood]

Bless you for your many long years of service, old man. Enjoy your newfound freedoms, you've definitely earned 'em!

[gophergeorge]

Update...

Spent the 150 bones and should have my resume NLT 1600 hours on Thursday... The guy who is writing is retired from the AF... he flew the C-141....

Thanks for all the kind words....

[JoeChalupa]

Damn, must be one helluva resume for 150 bones!


You da man GG!!

[2Blonde]

Just in case you need some help filling out a job application....Here are some tips......2Blonde

This is an actual job application a 17 year old boy submitted at a McDonald's fast-food establishment in Florida...and they hired him because he was so honest and funny!


NAME: Greg Bulmash

SEX: Not yet. Still waiting for the right person.

DESIRED POSITION: Company's President or Vice President. But seriously, whatever's available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be applying here in the first place.

DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz style severance package. If that's not possible, make an offer and we can haggle.

EDUCATION: Yes.

LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility.

SALARY: Less than I'm worth.

MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and post-it notes.

REASON FOR LEAVING: It sucked.

HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK: Any.

PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30-3:30 p.m., Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.

DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Yes, but they're better suited to a more intimate environment.

MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be here?

DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING UP TO 50 LBS?: Of what?

DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the more appropriate question here would be "Do you have a car that runs?"

HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?: I may already be a winner of the Publishers Clearing house Sweepstakes.

DO YOU SMOKE?: On the job no, on my breaks yes.

WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?: Living in the Bahamas with a fabulously wealthy dumb sexy blonde super model who thinks I'm the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually, I'd like to be doing that now.

DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE?: Yes. Absolutely.

SIGN HERE: Aries
:lmao

[gophergeorge]

That's funny....

Question.... Do I really have to wear a suit to interviews? Why pretend to be something I am not? Why not show the employer the "real me"? Starched Wranglers and a button-down?

[desflood]

Potential employers don't want to see the "real you". They want to see the model of what they could possibly make you into with enough harrassment.

[Slomo]

Just in case you need some help filling out a job application....Here are some tips......2Blonde

This is an actual job application a 17 year old boy submitted at a McDonald's fast-food establishment in Florida...and they hired him because he was so honest and funny!


NAME: Greg Bulmash

SEX: Not yet. Still waiting for the right person.

DESIRED POSITION: Company's President or Vice President. But seriously, whatever's available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be applying here in the first place.

DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz style severance package. If that's not possible, make an offer and we can haggle.

EDUCATION: Yes.

LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility.

SALARY: Less than I'm worth.

MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and post-it notes.

REASON FOR LEAVING: It sucked.

HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK: Any.

PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30-3:30 p.m., Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.

DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Yes, but they're better suited to a more intimate environment.

MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be here?

DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING UP TO 50 LBS?: Of what?

DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the more appropriate question here would be "Do you have a car that runs?"

HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?: I may already be a winner of the Publishers Clearing house Sweepstakes.

DO YOU SMOKE?: On the job no, on my breaks yes.

WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?: Living in the Bahamas with a fabulously wealthy dumb sexy blonde super model who thinks I'm the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually, I'd like to be doing that now.

DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE?: Yes. Absolutely.

SIGN HERE: Aries
:lmao I loved this one :lmao I can easily picture the guy reading this application :lmao but if they really gave him the job then they have a pretty good sense of humour.

Oh and he had the second answer wrong, the correct answer is:
SEX: Yes, please!