flipcritic
02-18-2009, 09:26 AM
http://vault.sportsillustrated.cnn.com/vault/article/magazine/MAG1152016/index.htm
How Low Can Coaches Go?
Phil Taylor
THE TALLEST boy on a middle school playground answers his cellphone. "Hello," he says.
"Hi, Kenny. This is coach Bobby Violation at Shady State University. Am I catching you at a bad time?"
KENNY: Um, kind of. I'm at recess.
COACH: O.K., I won't keep you long. I just wanted to tell you that after watching you at a couple of camps last summer, my staff thinks you're quite a basketball player and we'd love to see you wearing a Shady State uniform when you get to college.
KENNY: College? Are you sure you've got the right number? I'm only 12 years old.
COACH: Oh, I know, but last month the NCAA's legislative council lowered the minimum grade for a recruitable athlete in basketball to seventh. Until now, the rules covered the recruiting of kids only in ninth grade and above. That's probably because no one thought colleges would go after players younger than that, but you know how us coaches are. Shoot, I'd recruit a sonogram if it would help me beat out Kansas and North Carolina for a kid.
KENNY: I should hang up now. My parents will, like, take my phone away if they find out I've been talking to a stranger.
COACH: Sure, sure. But in the last two years USC has gotten verbal commitments from a pair of eighth-graders, Dwayne Polee Jr. and Ryan Boatwright. And another eighth-grader, Michael Avery, accepted a scholarship offer from Kentucky. The NCAA decided that if coaches were going to recruit players that young, those kids should be protected by the same rules as prospects in high school. So as long as coaches follow those rules—which means we don't get caught breaking them, like this phone call does—we can officially recruit kids your age.
KENNY: You mean, the NCAA was worried about coaches recruiting middle school kids, so they passed a rule to make it O.K. for coaches to recruit middle school kids? That doesn't make any sense.
COACH: You'll find that's not unusual for the NCAA, Kenny.
KENNY: Whatever. I'm too young to decide on a college. Right now I'm just worried about passing algebra.
COACH: Son, we have fifth-year seniors here who haven't passed algebra. Don't you worry about that. Let's talk about something that matters. What are you driving to school these days? Maybe we could help you upgrade in that department.
KENNY: Driving? I'm four years away from my learner's permit.
COACH: Right. My bad. Force of habit. How do you get to school?
KENNY: If the weather's good, usually on my skateboard.
COACH: O.K., if there's an overnight package on your front porch soon with a spanking new Birdhouse skateboard, it wouldn't surprise me. I wouldn't have any idea how it got there, of course, but it wouldn't surprise me. What else do you have on your wish list?
KENNY: Well, I'd kill to have a Wii.
COACH: Done. We have a booster who owns an electronics store.
KENNY: What's a booster?
COACH: You are young, aren't you? A booster is ... well, you know the tooth fairy?
KENNY: Duh. I just lost my last baby tooth a month ago.
COACH: Well, a booster is basically like the tooth fairy. He makes money just magically appear, but for kids who win games, not lose teeth.
KENNY: It all sounds great, Coach, but what if, like, when I'm a sophomore or junior in high school, I decide I want to go to another college instead?
COACH: I would hope that you're too loyal to back out of a commitment. Unless, of course, I'm coaching at another school by that time. Then I'd expect you to dump Shady like a bad girlfriend and come play for me there.
KENNY: Hold on, Coach, I'm getting another call.
(A few minutes of silence.)
KENNY: Um, that was my dad. He was pretty ticked when I told him you called me. He said that instead of regulating college coaches' contact with players my age, the NCAA should have banned it entirely. He thinks recruiting has gotten so crazy that you guys will be scouting my little brother's third-grade rec league team before long. I'm supposed to tell you to lose my phone number until I'm in high school.
COACH: He has a point. Tell your dad I'm sorry I bothered you.
KENNY: No problem.
COACH: But just out of curiosity, is your buddy Jimmy, the point guard, with you? Could you hand him the phone?
How Low Can Coaches Go?
Phil Taylor
THE TALLEST boy on a middle school playground answers his cellphone. "Hello," he says.
"Hi, Kenny. This is coach Bobby Violation at Shady State University. Am I catching you at a bad time?"
KENNY: Um, kind of. I'm at recess.
COACH: O.K., I won't keep you long. I just wanted to tell you that after watching you at a couple of camps last summer, my staff thinks you're quite a basketball player and we'd love to see you wearing a Shady State uniform when you get to college.
KENNY: College? Are you sure you've got the right number? I'm only 12 years old.
COACH: Oh, I know, but last month the NCAA's legislative council lowered the minimum grade for a recruitable athlete in basketball to seventh. Until now, the rules covered the recruiting of kids only in ninth grade and above. That's probably because no one thought colleges would go after players younger than that, but you know how us coaches are. Shoot, I'd recruit a sonogram if it would help me beat out Kansas and North Carolina for a kid.
KENNY: I should hang up now. My parents will, like, take my phone away if they find out I've been talking to a stranger.
COACH: Sure, sure. But in the last two years USC has gotten verbal commitments from a pair of eighth-graders, Dwayne Polee Jr. and Ryan Boatwright. And another eighth-grader, Michael Avery, accepted a scholarship offer from Kentucky. The NCAA decided that if coaches were going to recruit players that young, those kids should be protected by the same rules as prospects in high school. So as long as coaches follow those rules—which means we don't get caught breaking them, like this phone call does—we can officially recruit kids your age.
KENNY: You mean, the NCAA was worried about coaches recruiting middle school kids, so they passed a rule to make it O.K. for coaches to recruit middle school kids? That doesn't make any sense.
COACH: You'll find that's not unusual for the NCAA, Kenny.
KENNY: Whatever. I'm too young to decide on a college. Right now I'm just worried about passing algebra.
COACH: Son, we have fifth-year seniors here who haven't passed algebra. Don't you worry about that. Let's talk about something that matters. What are you driving to school these days? Maybe we could help you upgrade in that department.
KENNY: Driving? I'm four years away from my learner's permit.
COACH: Right. My bad. Force of habit. How do you get to school?
KENNY: If the weather's good, usually on my skateboard.
COACH: O.K., if there's an overnight package on your front porch soon with a spanking new Birdhouse skateboard, it wouldn't surprise me. I wouldn't have any idea how it got there, of course, but it wouldn't surprise me. What else do you have on your wish list?
KENNY: Well, I'd kill to have a Wii.
COACH: Done. We have a booster who owns an electronics store.
KENNY: What's a booster?
COACH: You are young, aren't you? A booster is ... well, you know the tooth fairy?
KENNY: Duh. I just lost my last baby tooth a month ago.
COACH: Well, a booster is basically like the tooth fairy. He makes money just magically appear, but for kids who win games, not lose teeth.
KENNY: It all sounds great, Coach, but what if, like, when I'm a sophomore or junior in high school, I decide I want to go to another college instead?
COACH: I would hope that you're too loyal to back out of a commitment. Unless, of course, I'm coaching at another school by that time. Then I'd expect you to dump Shady like a bad girlfriend and come play for me there.
KENNY: Hold on, Coach, I'm getting another call.
(A few minutes of silence.)
KENNY: Um, that was my dad. He was pretty ticked when I told him you called me. He said that instead of regulating college coaches' contact with players my age, the NCAA should have banned it entirely. He thinks recruiting has gotten so crazy that you guys will be scouting my little brother's third-grade rec league team before long. I'm supposed to tell you to lose my phone number until I'm in high school.
COACH: He has a point. Tell your dad I'm sorry I bothered you.
KENNY: No problem.
COACH: But just out of curiosity, is your buddy Jimmy, the point guard, with you? Could you hand him the phone?