View Full Version : 100 memorable UFC fights--Kalib Starnes VS Nate Quarry #74

04-30-2009, 04:01 PM
A look at 100 memorable UFC fights



No. 74: Kalib Starnes versus Nate Quarry
UFC 83, April 19, 2008 -- Montreal

"For those who believe UFC 97's Anderson Silva-Thales Leites title match has no peer as a textbook case of avoiding confrontation, might we remind you of a match that took place almost one year to the day prior -- and in the exact same arena.

It was one of the most puzzling and bizarre scenarios in the short history of UFC: Nate Quarry chasing Kalib Starnes around the Octagon in Montreal, intent on fighting but unable to catch Starnes to engage. For 15 minutes, the chase was on: Quarry coming forward, Starnes backpedaling, sidestepping, doing anything to avoid confrontation. They ran and ran, like a thief fleeing the police. The only thing missing was carnival music playing over the Bell Centre sound system.

In an unofficial fight stat, ESPN.com counted Starnes throwing 57 punches in three rounds. Not landing 57 punches. Throwing. That's fewer than four punches per minute over a three-round fight. And things got worse the longer the bout lasted. Starnes' punches dwindled from 24 in the first, to 19 in the second, to 14 in the third. Now, keep in mind that most of those strikes were jabs, and some of them were thrown from far enough away that they no chance of actually landing.

By comparison, ESPN.com had Quarry surpassing Starnes' entire three-round punch output in the first round alone, when Quarry threw over 60 punches. He was also very active with low leg kicks.

As the fight went on, Quarry grew noticeably frustrated, even booing along with the crowd, which, coincidentally, was the largest audience to watch an MMA fight in North America at that point. The 21,390 eventually decided to entertain themselves by chanting "GSP" during the frequent, extended lulls in the action.

"It's funny," Quarry said. "We thought that we'd come up with a way to answer any possibly scenario. But we've never seen a fight like that. It was one thing we couldn't prepare for."

Late in the third round, the fight devolved from drama to comedy. First, Quarry, clearly exasperated, moved toward Starnes in an exaggerated running motion. Starnes responded with his most effective offensive maneuver of the night, a middle finger. Seconds later, Quarry covered his eyes and threw what he termed "rock-hammer" punches, hoping to draw Starnes in. No dice.

The ringside judges scored the bout 30-27, 30-26 and 30-24 for Quarry, likely the most lopsided scores ever recorded in a fight that never came close to being finished. Quarry then delivered the coup de grace: Having entered the fight as the enemy in front a partisan Canadian crowd cheering on Starnes, he perfectly delivered the famous "If I can change and you can change, everybody can change" line from "Rocky IV." The crowd, of course, went wild.

The abuse heaped on Starnes, though, wasn't over. The media hammered him. Yahoo! characterized his performance "disgraceful." Newsday wrote that Starnes was "backpedaling like a free safety covering a post pattern." Sherdog.com called it a "track meet."

Not surprisingly, UFC President Dana White was furious. Within two days, White released Starnes from his contract -- Starnes says he asked to be released -- and told the media he should "consider a new line of work."

Since then, Starnes has fought only once, for a Hawaiian promotion called Destiny MMA, and won. Quarry, meanwhile, returned to the scene of the crime at UFC 97 and knocked out Jason MacDonald in the first round.

After being let go, Starnes suggested his lackluster performance was due to injuries. He offered to show the media copies of his medical report, saying, "I can barely walk." Of course, that wasn't the case during the fight. Starnes moved extremely well in the Octagon -- so well, in fact, that he ran himself right out of the UFC."

I can remember sitting on my couch lauging my ass off with how bad Starnes embarassed himself in this fight..


05-01-2009, 07:51 AM
That was definitely memorable.

"I can barely walk (but in fact I can run like a coward just fine)."

Wait, I want to edit that. It's not my intention to sound like some keyboard warrior. Retreating definitely has its strategic place in battle. The idea, of course, is that if all you do is retreat you shouldn't have come to battle in the first place.

05-01-2009, 11:42 AM
Yeah he can barely walk but he was able to put his entire body weight on each of his feet and switch off pushing up to hop and plant. whatever

Remember how he quit during TUF with that phantom broken rib?

05-01-2009, 12:16 PM
DAMN this shit cracks me up even now