The '08-'09 All D-Bag Team

[lakersuck]

Recognizing the Biggest Douche Bags in the Leage.
From The West my team looks like:
G Kobe
G Jason Richardson
F Gasol
F K-Mart
C Erica Dampeir

With 6th man: Shach Vujacic

Coach: Phil Jackson

Owner: Mark Cuban

Mavs fans will be rushing to cheer them on

Taken on the East team of
G Iverson
G Rondo
F Raja Bell
F Anderson Varejao
C Joakim Noah

6th Man: Starburry

Coach: Van Gundy

Owner: Whoever owns the Knicks

Fans: Celtics fans

Reffing the Contest would be none other than Joey Crawford

[manufan10]

How is Garnett not on the East?

[Thunder Dan]

you could just say the Lakers for the West and I don't think you would get much of an argument. I was watching a game last week and they had Kobe, Pau, Sasha, Luke Walton and Shannon Brown all on the court at the same time. If they put Adam Morrison in it would have been dancing with the stars.

[j-money24]

You people get so jealous of the Lakers.

[DPG21920]

PG: Ghazi
SG: Lakaluva
SF: TheMACHINE
PF: DeadlyDynasty
C: 21_Blessings

Coach: DrHouse
GM: KBP
Owner: tlongII

[benefactor]

PG: Ghazi
SG: Lakaluva
SF: TheMACHINE
PF: DeadlyDynasty
C: 21_Blessings

Coach: DrHouse
GM: KBP
Owner: tlongII
:tu

[lil_penny]

bwhahahaha... props to Tlong for owning the team though:toast

[Allanon]

Y'all just hatin on the TLONG'ster

[j-money24]

PG: Ghazi
SG: Lakaluva
SF: TheMACHINE
PF: DeadlyDynasty
C: 21_Blessings

Coach: DrHouse
GM: KBP
Owner: tlongII

Don't

[j-money24]

PG: Ghazi
SG: Lakaluva
SF: TheMACHINE
PF: DeadlyDynasty
C: 21_Blessings

Coach: DrHouse
GM: KBP
Owner: tlongII

Don't be

[j-money24]

PG: Ghazi
SG: Lakaluva
SF: TheMACHINE
PF: DeadlyDynasty
C: 21_Blessings

Coach: DrHouse
GM: KBP
Owner: tlongII

Dont be surprised if TlongII trades a Kobe type of player for Greg Oden.

[DPG21920]

Just announced: tlongII has given permission to the GM of the Ass Pirates, KBP, to trade their #1 draft pick in this years Douche Draft for a more established Douche in Lebomb. Lebomb is coming off a career year with the Taints, where he had an unbelievable Douche efficiency rating of +26 that landed him on the All-Douche team for the first time. This trade is said to rival the Garnett trade which many thought brought the most Douche to one team ever.

DrHouse: "The Pirates needed someone who can make an instant Douche impact for the Ass Pirates run at the D-Bag-O'brien"

[DPG21920]

This is the year of douche-busters folks. My sources tell me that Allanon, the douche who exploded onto the scene out of now where in the DBA (Douche Bag Association) right after one Douche gifted another Douche All-Star to the Lakers, has just been acquired to run the point for the Ass Pirates.

This comes on the heels of Ghazi, the former Douche who ran the team, having a falling out with coach DrHouse for not upping his Douchiness. DrHouse warned Ghazi, who had noticeably scaled back his d-baggery in recent weeks, that: "the PG is what drives the true Doucheness of a championship Douche team". When Ghazi did not respond, a blockbuster trade was made and sent the unhappy Douche Ghazi packing and brought in the leagues biggest douche surprise of the year in Allanon.

It is a risky move to send the Douche Veteran Ghazi out and bring in a new, front-running style of d-bag in Allanon to run the team. It is a move that the Ass Pirates will hope helps them win now along with build for the future. Allanon certainly seems to have an extraordinary douche future ahead of him in the DBA.

[Allanon]

This is the year of douche-busters folks. My sources tell me that Allanon, the douche who exploded onto the scene out of now where in the DBA (Douche Bag Association) right after one Douche gifted another Douche All-Star to the Lakers, has just been acquired to run the point for the Ass Pirates.

This comes on the heels of Ghazi, the former Douche who ran the team, having a falling out with coach DrHouse for not upping his Douchiness. DrHouse warned Ghazi, who had noticeably scaled back his d-baggery in recent weeks, that: "the PG is what drives the true Doucheness of a championship Douche team". When Ghazi did not respond, a blockbuster trade was made and sent the unhappy Douche Ghazi packing and brought in the leagues biggest douche surprise of the year in Allanon.

It is a risky move to send the Douche Veteran Ghazi out and bring in a new, front-running style of d-bag in Allanon to run the team. It is a move that the Ass Pirates will hope helps them win now along with build for the future. Allanon certainly seems to have an extraordinary douche future ahead of him in the DBA.

:lol I'm honored. Thanks DPG. :tu

[Spursfan092120]

This is the year of douche-busters folks. My sources tell me that Allanon, the douche who exploded onto the scene out of now where in the DBA (Douche Bag Association) right after one Douche gifted another Douche All-Star to the Lakers, has just been acquired to run the point for the Ass Pirates.

This comes on the heels of Ghazi, the former Douche who ran the team, having a falling out with coach DrHouse for not upping his Douchiness. DrHouse warned Ghazi, who had noticeably scaled back his d-baggery in recent weeks, that: "the PG is what drives the true Doucheness of a championship Douche team". When Ghazi did not respond, a blockbuster trade was made and sent the unhappy Douche Ghazi packing and brought in the leagues biggest douche surprise of the year in Allanon.

It is a risky move to send the Douche Veteran Ghazi out and bring in a new, front-running style of d-bag in Allanon to run the team. It is a move that the Ass Pirates will hope helps them win now along with build for the future. Allanon certainly seems to have an extraordinary douche future ahead of him in the DBA.
:lmao:lmao:lmao Wow...this was incredibly creative and insightful..lol...may be the post of the week...LOL!! Only thing that keeps me from saying it definitely is the post of the week is Lakaluva's already infamous "There's your MVP!" thread...epic.

[kamikazi_player]

Meh, I would switch Jason Richardson with Jason Terry.

[DPG21920]

:oops

[Allanon]

I hope I get Douche-Bag MVP too. :lol

[Ghazi]

I ain't no douche!

[Spur-Addict]

This is the year of douche-busters folks. My sources tell me that Allanon, the douche who exploded onto the scene out of now where in the DBA (Douche Bag Association) right after one Douche gifted another Douche All-Star to the Lakers, has just been acquired to run the point for the Ass Pirates.

This comes on the heels of Ghazi, the former Douche who ran the team, having a falling out with coach DrHouse for not upping his Douchiness. DrHouse warned Ghazi, who had noticeably scaled back his d-baggery in recent weeks, that: "the PG is what drives the true Doucheness of a championship Douche team". When Ghazi did not respond, a blockbuster trade was made and sent the unhappy Douche Ghazi packing and brought in the leagues biggest douche surprise of the year in Allanon.

It is a risky move to send the Douche Veteran Ghazi out and bring in a new, front-running style of d-bag in Allanon to run the team. It is a move that the Ass Pirates will hope helps them win now along with build for the future. Allanon certainly seems to have an extraordinary douche future ahead of him in the DBA.

Yes, but Ghazi was released and he resigned for the veteran Douche mininum.

[DPG21920]

Ghazi will be a sought after Douche. He is like the Jason Kidd of Douche in the DBA.

Draft Express has Ghazi as:

Best Case: Mel Gibson
Worst Case: Gary Payton

[DPG21920]

This is the DBA finals Stern has wanted everyone! Cannot wait until Thursday. Some amazing one-on-one match ups to look at. Representing the West you have the Ass Pirates.

PG: Allanon
SG: Lakaluva
SF: TheMACHINE
PF: DeadlyDynasty
C: 21_Blessings

X-Factor: Lebomb
Coach: DrHouse
GM: KBP
Owner: tlongII

The Pirates have one of the most young and exciting teams in the league folks. Full of all kinds of d-bags and even some explosive doucheness coming off the bench in Lebomb. Their coach, DrHouse, is tied only with Phil Jackson in the number d-rings with an amazing 9. They are going to be a tough out in a 7 game series because of their free-style douche play.

Representing the East you have another young team, the Cuckolds, but they are spearheaded by an all time douche veteran great in Blake. Blake is the only back-to-back DBA MVP in the league. Many say he is on his last douche legs, but I have talked with him and he has plenty of douche-fight left in him.

PG: Blake
SG: Thunder Dan
SF: Bump
PF: Poop
C: BenJarvus

X-Factor: Whott
Coach: Dickface
GM: Greg Oden
Owner: Bump.

Whott truly is an X-Factor in the true sense of the word. He is known for his sometimes douchebaggy comments that are inflammatory, both on and off the court, but the man has some serious douche talent. When he is on, he can be the biggest douche in the DBA.

This will truly be a DBA finals to remember. I never bet against the biggest Douche in a series, and since the Cuckolds have Blake:

My Pick: Cuckolds in 7

[sook]

PG: Ghazi
SG: Lakaluva
SF: TheMACHINE
PF: DeadlyDynasty
C: 21_Blessings

Coach: DrHouse
GM: KBP
Owner: tlongII

epic :lmao

[mavs>spurs2]

where's SD in all that doucheness?

[DPG21920]

No way is SD in there. Leonard is in the DBA D League, so SD will be in there soon enough. SD is just Leonard's nickname along with Peter Parker aka Spiderman aka my nephew.

[mavs>spurs2]

what about mrchug and atxrocker?

[mavs>spurs2]

there are some seriously talented free agents out there just waiting to be signed

[DPG21920]

They are in the league, but this is the DBA finals. Why you worrying about those guys? You have 2 time D-Bag MVP Blake vs Lakaluva!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It is a dream final!!!!!!!!!!!

That would be like having Kobe and Lebron in the finals and you are worried about Amare and Kenyon Martin.

[DPG21920]

There will be a D-Bag FA frenzy in 2010. A lot of big douches available and a lot of teams clearing room to sign them. Should be a great and exciting year for the DBA!

But next year, you might see some blockbusters with teams looking for a pure douche dump to get ready for 2010. It will be a buyers market and you have to see which Douche GM's will be ready to pounce.

[dirk4mvp]

sons who are the Mexico City Sausage Smokers looking to pick up in the off season?

[DPG21920]

sons who are the Mexico City Sausage Smokers looking to pick up in the off season?

My sources have told me that they are in the market for a prime time SF. Rumor has it they are looking for a sign-and-trade with the Memphis Manpleasers for Ducks.

The Smokers would receive Ducks and the Manpleasers in a pure douche dump to prepare for 2010 would receive the expiring contracts of EricB and Sequ along with cash. They would just be bought out and retire.

[DUNCANownsKOBE2]

My sources have told me that they are in the market for a prime time SF. Rumor has it they are looking for a sign-and-trade with the Memphis Manpleasers for Ducks.

The Smokers would receive Ducks and the Manpleasers in a pure douche dump to prepare for 2010 would receive the expiring contracts of EricB and Sequ along with cash. They would just be bought out and retire.

:lmao:lmao:lmao:lmao:lmao


I take it the Sausage Smokers team captain Gino?

[lil_penny]

Still can't believe the fairbanks log handlers got knocked out in the first round.

[DPG21920]

sons who are the Mexico City Sausage Smokers looking to pick up in the off season?


My sources have told me that they are in the market for a prime time SF. Rumor has it they are looking for a sign-and-trade with the Memphis Manpleasers for Ducks.

The Smokers would receive Ducks and the Manpleasers in a pure douche dump to prepare for 2010 would receive the expiring contracts of EricB and Sequ along with cash. They would just be bought out and retire.

After an amazing final, that saw the Ass Pirates defeat the Cuckolds in 7 intense games, we have the first major piece to fall this off-season.

In the first major move of the year, the Mexico City Sausage Smokers have added Cobbler via trade with The Dumb Cunny's. After a deal could not be worked out with the Manpleasers for Ducks, the Smokers immediately moved to their next target, Cobbler.

Cobbler, an electrifying douche and 3 time DBA All-Star, fills the Smokers SF need. They now feel that they have all the "tools" to compete for the D-Bag O'brien. They were not happy with their first round exit and vowed to bring in "a douche that could turn this franchise in the right direction". They truly feel they have accomplished this by adding Cobbler.

Cobbler's former team, The Dumb Cunny's, are looking to rebuild and received some salary relief along with a future 1st rounder and the young douche Miami Heat. Not a bad coupe for a team that is rebuilding; many believe Miami Heat has potential to be a multiple douche all-star. The coach of the Cunny's had this to say about Cobbler:

"He was the ultimate douche in his time with the Cunny's. You cannot coach the kind of pure douche talent Cobbler had and he will be missed."

Stay tuned for more...

[DPG21920]

Lakaluva, just because you are coming off an outstanding year that saw your team holding the D-Bag O'brien and where you were the MDP of the series, don't get content. You are no longer the favorites and many teams will be gunning for you.

You seem like Paul Pierce right now. Win a title, get the MVP and get cocky. You are an amazing douche, but you also had a lot of talent around you.

[Allanon]

After a long summer, I've arrived in the DBL camp fit and ready for the new season. Looking forward to making the DBL All-Star team this year.

Some stiff competition this year, but I'll break out some 83 win ecstasy in a couple of weeks to seal the deal.

[DPG21920]

After a long summer, I've arrived in the DBL camp fit and ready for the new season. Looking forward to making the DBL All-Star team this year.

Some stiff competition this year, but I'll break out some 83 win ecstasy in a couple of weeks to seal the deal.

Many have written you off my friend. We will see if you have it in you to push forward.

[da_suns_fan]

you could just say the Lakers for the West and I don't think you would get much of an argument. I was watching a game last week and they had Kobe, Pau, Sasha, Luke Walton and Shannon Brown all on the court at the same time. If they put Adam Morrison in it would have been dancing with the stars.

:lol:lol:lol

[Allanon]

Many have written you off my friend. We will see if you have it in you to push forward.

See....that's what I get for taking off for the summer. Get written off and shit.

I'll try my best to push forward, kind Sir. :lol

[Brazil]

This thread has a serious potential of greatness

[Brazil]

This thread has a serious potential of greatness

damn I killed the thread :lol

[Indazone]

Didn't anyone get the note? KBP was fired. He is however, now the starting GM for the Greek National Team.

[DPG21920]

Going into the season, the league was looking for more parity. There was a lot of douche talent all piled up at the top, but now there are a ton of quality teams. These are like fantasy rosters folks.

The depth of the league is just outstanding and there will be some serious competition for the trophy this year. Only one team was happy with the way last year ended and you can tell no one is resting on past accomplishments. Here are my power rankings entering the start of the season:

1) The Ass Pirates:
PG: Allanon
SG: Lakaluva
SF: TheMACHINE
PF: DeadlyDynasty
C: 21_Blessings

X-Factor: Lebomb
Coach: DrHouse
GM: Indazone
Owner: tlongII

Key Additions: None
Key Subtractions: KBP

Coming off of their recent title, the Pirates feel good about the team they have. With recent MDP Lakaluva, they feel they have a few good title runs left in them with this current roster. The biggest addition came in the front office. Indazone has replaced one of the douchiest GM's in KBP. Indazone, the newest GM in the DBA has been quoted as follows: "I have been begging for an opportunity to break into the DBA, I feel that my whole life has prepared me for this moment and I am looking to add to the complete and total doucheability of this proud franchise". It will be interesting to see what it will be like to have such an active douche GM in this league.

2) The Cuckolds:
PG: Blake
SG: Thunder Dan
SF: Bump
PF: Poop
C: TD21

X-Factor: Whott
Coach: Dickface
GM: Greg Oden
Owner: Bump.

Key Additions: TD21
Key Subtractions: BenJarvus

After a disappointing loss in the finals the Cuckolds seem right on track. It has been a strange season for the Cuckolds to say the least. BenJarvus, a key douche last year for the Cuckolds became involved in some weird douche activities involving High School Musical and Whippets. After his disappearance the DBA granted the Cuckolds an amnesty clause and that allowed for the team to pick up the young up and comer TD21. This provides the shot of youth in the arm of this team that could propel them to the title. TD21 is thrilled to be a part of a team that just made it to the finals: "The genesis of the team is mind-boggling" says TD21. They are a team to watch out for.

3) Mexico City Sausage Smokers:
PG: B2B
SG: Mookie
SF: Cobbler
PF: 4cc
C: Gino

X-Factor: Fans
Coach: Kareem
GM: Mitch Kupchak
Owner: Jerry West

Key Additions: Cobbler
Key Subtractions: Miami Heat

Known for having the best crowds in the game, the Smokers are on fire alright. They have landed the marquee player everyone believes could push them over the top in Cobbler. I have them ranked at 3, but don't be surprised if these Sausage Smokers are the Douches of the year. Getting rid of the talented, yet troubled douche in Miami Heat is a talent loss, but should be better from a team chemistry point. Everyone was depressed that dealt with Miami Heat, but now that he is gone, they can move forward.

4) Memphis Manpleasers:
PG: Ducks
SG: EricB
SF: Sequ
PF: LOL
C: Leonard

X-Factor: EricB
Coach: Michael Jordan
GM: Mark Cuban
Owner: Tpark

Key Additions: EricB, Sequ
Key Subtractions: None

After a strange turn of events this summer, the Manpleasers might have other teams on their knees. After problems all summer with Free Agent Ducks, the MP's have reached an agreement to extend him into the foreseeable future after both sides had a change of heart. Then unexpectedly, veterans EricB and Sequ were released and latched onto the team's roster. This gives them a wide array of douche weapons and could be the mix of old and new that leads this team to the promise land. New douche owner Mark Cuban is known for his douchey antics, but no one can deny his drive to be the best douche he can be. It will be interesting to see how this team gels.

That's it folks, those are your top teams for this year. Stay tuned to see how this plays out and I am certain there will be many more moves to come!

[Ditty]

fagbourne should be somewhere on that 1st team

[DeadlyDynasty]

With a little luck and some D-bagness I might be able to hold down my starting spot at the 4

[DPG21920]

fagbourne should be somewhere on that 1st team

Culburn is the logo:

http://www.dba.org.uk/aboutdba/images/dba-logo.jpg
http://www.sccs.swarthmore.edu/users/06/adem/photoshop/tutorials/nba-logo/nba-logo-3.png

[Culburn369]

Culburn is the logo:

http://www.dba.org.uk/aboutdba/images/dba-logo.jpg
http://www.sccs.swarthmore.edu/users/06/adem/photoshop/tutorials/nba-logo/nba-logo-3.png

He still rang/sans Daddy.

tee, hee.

[Mavs_man_41]

I guarantee if you guys dont already hate me, you will soon enough

I'm taking home the MVP this year

[carrao45]

:lmao:lmao:lmao Wow...this was incredibly creative and insightful..lol...may be the post of the week...LOL!! Only thing that keeps me from saying it definitely is the post of the week is Lakaluva's already infamous "There's your MVP!" thread...epic.

That was the thread title?

[Mavs_man_41]

You're not gonna grab that trophy as long as those Rockets fools are still around here, no matter how pathetically their team are expected to suck next season with only a bunch of nipple suckers around tracy's tits.

:lmao Rocket fans suck

[Allanon]

Speaking of KBP, what happened to him? I missed it.

Came back, next thing I know, KBP's posts are gone.

[Chieflion]

Speaking of KBP, what happened to him? I missed it.

Came back, next thing I know, KBP's posts are gone.
I heard he was banned. If he is unbanned, he will show up once Denver faces off against Partizan.

[Brazil]

Speaking of KBP, what happened to him? I missed it.

Came back, next thing I know, KBP's posts are gone.

apparently timvp took care of him

[Allanon]

apparently timvp took care of him


I heard he was banned. If he is unbanned, he will show up once Denver faces off against Partizan.

Hahah faces off vs "Partizan" :D

Thanks for the info guys. Now, if TimVP could just ban Brazil, ST would be perfect.

[j-money24]

I want some consideration for taking the MVP this year, im going to have a break-out year, im in my prime bitches !

[Kobe™]

Womp Womp Womp