Talking to a sibling that is dying

[CosmicCowboy]

OK, we are all dying but a lot of you fuckers aren't getting it yet.

For those of you that remember another earlier post I made when I had my emotional fences down I have a sister that is dying of breast cancer. The shit is in her lungs, in her bones, and her lymph nodes.

If you roll that way thank you for your prayers but that isn't gonna change shit. She's on her last feasible chemo treatment regimen after all the others have failed and she and I know it's a potential change in weeks/months and not years. She still looks totally normal, has a vibrant life, and still traveling...in the last year she has been on photo safaris to the Far East and Africa.

I just hung up my cell after we just talked for 3 hours and said stuff we could never say before. Not at any crazy personal level but just things that brothers/sisters never talk about. End of life converstions get really deep.

Anyway...next time you see your brother/sister/mom/dad give them a big hug and start a conversation you would have never had with them.

Trust me, you won't regret it.

[CosmicCowboy]

She and I are so on the same track on this end of life shit.

She's moving to Oregon, establishing residence, and doing chemo and smoking legal medicinal dope till it's time to legally punch out on her terms....:toast

[duncan228]

Trust me, you won't regret it.

It's true, you won't regret it. My sister is a two-time survivor of breast cancer. I've had those conversations and I'm glad I did.

[Frenzy]

already done. didn't need that to happen to a loved one either. Best wishes...

[CosmicCowboy]

It's true, you won't regret it. My sister is a two-time survivor of breast cancer. I've had those conversations and I'm glad I did.

:toast

Cheers to you and your sister. Unfortunately my sister has the triple neg variety and there aren't any happy endings on that one after the first relapse.

[balli]

Sage advice. And I'm truly sorry to hear about that CC.

[TDMVPDPOY]

oi cosmic is this genetic pass down? you have a checkup also yet or what?

[JamStone]

I have a brother and sister that live in Texas and I'm here in Detroit. My brother is visiting now and leaves tomorrow morning. Just took him out to shoot some pool and shoot the shit. I never fail to appreciate the time with my immediate family members and hopefully never have regrettable moments from here on out. This is a good reminder from an unfortunate situation. My heart goes out to your sister, you, and your family. Thanks for the reminder. Sometimes it's easy to hold grudges, easy to forget to say "love ya," easy to not appreciate the simple things about someone you love.

I've lost distant cousins, grandparents I wasn't close to, acquaintances. I've never lost anyone from my immediate family, and I pray it will be a long, long, long time before I have to confront that. I get scared sometimes because my parents are getting up there in age. Corny and mush, but so poignant and true. Appreciate your loved ones and let them know you do...

[tlongII]

Peace be with ya CC. I've had family members with serious illnesses over the past couple of years myself. It kinda sucks that you wait until something like this happens to tell them what you feel, but at least you get it done. Hey, at least she's living in Oregon now! :tu

[CosmicCowboy]

Peace be with ya CC. I've had family members with serious illnesses over the past couple of years myself. It kinda sucks that you wait until something like this happens to tell them what you feel, but at least you get it done. Hey, at least she's living in Oregon now! :tu

naaa...she is still in Dallas talking about it. We are just working out details. Even with her being single with no kids things still get incredibly complicated... don't get me wrong...we have always talked and argued politics and gotten into deep conversations...

At this point in time it looks pretty clear that both of us will be there at the end smoking dope and wishing we had more time.

[marini martini]

CC, I for one will keep your sis, and family in my prayers. Sounds like she fought the good fight, and now has enough moxie to go out with dignity. Props to her!!! How lucky she has you for a bro.:tu

[BlackSwordsMan]

my family aint the talking/loving kind

[JoeChalupa]

Words of wisdom. I cherish every moment I have with my family and have a great relationship with my older sis and younger brother. I have an older brother though who I butt heads with all the time and we've never been real close but he just lost his wife back in May and she had been seriously ill for over 2 yrs. Sadly it took that for us to become closer and he has really stepped up to the plate this past month or so that I've needed his support.

[JudynTX]

CC....I will keep you and your entire family in my thoughts and prayers. Our family makes it a point to get together at least once a month. :tu Ever since losing my mother, my family has gotten even closer and that's exactly what my Mom would have wanted. :)

[LnGrrrR]

OK, we are all dying but a lot of you fuckers aren't getting it yet.

For those of you that remember another earlier post I made when I had my emotional fences down I have a sister that is dying of breast cancer. The shit is in her lungs, in her bones, and her lymph nodes.

If you roll that way thank you for your prayers but that isn't gonna change shit. She's on her last feasible chemo treatment regimen after all the others have failed and she and I know it's a potential change in weeks/months and not years. She still looks totally normal, has a vibrant life, and still traveling...in the last year she has been on photo safaris to the Far East and Africa.

I just hung up my cell after we just talked for 3 hours and said stuff we could never say before. Not at any crazy personal level but just things that brothers/sisters never talk about. End of life converstions get really deep.

Anyway...next time you see your brother/sister/mom/dad give them a big hug and start a conversation you would have never had with them.

Trust me, you won't regret it.

Good luck man.

[BacktoBasics]

I'm sorry CC. Hopefully there is time to exhaust the radically crazy non-medical voodoo out there. Stranger things have happened. I'm hoping for the best.

[clambake]

strong to the end, cowboy.

[I. Hustle]

I think it's awesome that she is at peace with everything. I would like to think that is how I would go out. I would love to just travel and see stuff I hadn't seen before and just have a positive attitude. What's the point in being down in the dumps and all depressed if there is nothing you can do about it? Might as well live it up while you can.
That is cool that you two are spending this time together beause you will always remember this.

[sonic21]

Good luck Cowboy!

My older sister had bone cancer in her right knee 4 years ago when she was 26. She has survived. I was living in England back then so we were on the phone everyday for hours. And it's true, we were talking about things we had never talked before during that time. Our conversation were kind of superficial before and we weren't really close.
But in times like this, it really opens our eyes about things that really matter.

[Bigzax]

Godbless her CC...

way ahead of you on the dope smoking.

[JoeChalupa]

Godbless her CC...

way ahead of you on the dope smoking.


My sister-in-law began asking for weed about a year ago since she had no appetite. They gave her the pills but they didn't work like smoking did. She said it made a huge difference on how she felt.

[JoeChalupa]

Not to hijack this thread but I myself have been doing some thinking and pondering about death lately.

[Ed Helicopter Jones]

I've lost loved ones suddenly from heart attacks, strokes or accidents, and slowly from cancer. For those of us still here, and for those dying I suppose, the slow route gives us a chance to say all the things we need to say, but that's a small consolation to someone having to suffer through illness. I'll never forget my last conversations with the people I've lost over the years. The whole "dying" part of life has never made a lot of sense to me.

CC, sorry brother.

[mrsmaalox]

The bitterest tears shed over graves
are for words left unsaid and deeds left undone.

~ Harriet Beecher Stowe ~

[lefty]

CC,

Thank you for sharing; as soon as I read your post, I started thinking about my loved ones

We're all behind you, stay strong

Stay strong

[SpursWoman]

I'm very, very saddened to hear about your sister. I feel for you & your family ... breast cancer has marked my family a few times. :(

[Spursfan092120]

My condolences...my mother is in remission. My father has had a terminal illness for 20 years now. Doctors gave him a max of 3 years to live...he's a fighter.

[Fpoonsie]

I'm really sorry, CC. I remember your earlier thread addressing the situation and hoped (maybe against hope) that things would start looking up for you and yours. I'm sure your sis appreciates your strength (along w/ your cooking).

[mingus]

:depressedsorry to hear that man. i never felt the stress i felt when my mom had BC a year ago. they caught it early on, and everything is good for now after the surgeries. it was a long, difficult thing to go through with the different evaluations and procedures they perform and not knowing how things are going to turn out.

hang in there, man

[travis2]

When our time is getting short, family is supposed to be the constant in our lives.

I'm happy you've been able to spend some quality time talking with your sister, although I hate the circumstances. I'll be praying for the both of you.

[JamStone]

I just donated a pound of Amy's blend at Caribou Coffee for their breast cancer awareness cause. I don't have anyone close going through this so if you'd like, I'll put up your sister's name on their honor board. What's your sister's name?

[angel_luv]

I prayed for you and your sister C.C. and the rest of your family also.