ITT I will prove my life coaching abilities and worthiness to the Club

[BacktoBasics]

I like B2B too. Just that, he's no life coach.

I see that my skills are being called in to question so I propose a challenge. You as the high quality Club contributing posters that you are have two options in this thread.

1. Post legitimately bad advice that I have given in the past. Sans the sarcasm. I'm talking real world applicable advice that was truly in poor judgment. I will either admit that it was bad advice or defend it.

2. Post a question. A serious one. I will provide (free of charge. A 9,487.99 dollar value) high quality life coaching advice.

I'm willing to put my trade, my craft, on the line for display right here today for all to see.

[TDMVPDPOY]

antoine walker, mike tyson and all the bankrupts out there, where were you b2b in a time of need?

[BacktoBasics]

antoine walker, mike tyson and all the bankrupts out there, where were you b2b in a time of need?All they had to do was pick up the phone.

[I. Hustle]

http://www.cosmicbuddha.com/blog/archives/images/robomoron.gif

[Dr. Gonzo]

http://www.e-imagesite.com/Files2/14304514.gif

[mrsmaalox]

B2B doesn't need to prove anything to anyone.



http://www.e-imagesite.com/Files2/14304514.gif

I think I may vomit.

[angel_luv]

I have a question for you.


I strongly suspect that a family member of one of my closest friends is addicted to prescription drugs and I am not sure how to best handle the situation.
For the sake of clarity, I will call the addicted person Chris though that is not the person's real name.

Chris might really have a legitimate illness or Chris might have a far less serious condition Chris is using as an excuse to heavily medicate. It is very hard to discern because all that is known of Chris' illness is what Chris tells people about Chris' illness and what Chris claim the doctors have to say about it.
It should be noted that Chris goes from doctor to doctor, claiming that none of the doctors want to treat Chris and that no doctor will take Chris seriously.


Something else: Chris has symptoms that come and go though Chris claims the condition is permanent. An example of this is memory loss.

While Chris does seem to have some serious ailments, it is not clear whether the person is suffering more from actual body infirmity or from the side effects of the numerous medications they are taking.
And, it is unclear what medications Chris is taking because they have so many and Chris is always switching them.

The more my friend talks to me about Chris' plight, the more I am convinced that the Chris truly has an addiction issue in addition to some other serious, longterm emotional issues.

My friend knows something is amiss with the Chris. However my friend and the rest of Chris' family have been conditioned for a long time by Chris to cater to Chris. Now whatever Chris says is automatically law, no matter what the request. And this seems perfectly natural to the majority of Chris' family. If anyone in Chris' family are aware that Chris is forcing them all to live in a way that is unbalanced and unhealthy, it appears they are to scared to speak up.

I have met Chris. Chris can be incredibly charming. Chris is also not above using manipulation and can be very convincing.

I am concerned that unless/ until Chris family corporately puts their foot down that nothing will change.

And so in the meantime I don't know what my friend can do other than be aware and keep a distance from the danger and heartache Chris is exposing everone to.


This situation has taken a toll on me as well because my friend and I are very close. Chris' drama has both strained and hindered my friend's and my relationship because Chris is so demanding and my friend struggles with feeling obligated to take care of Chris


So I would like to know the following:

How can I be a good support system for my friend?

What are some signs of addiction that my friend should be aware of when it comes to Chris?

If my friend wanted to approach other family members regarding Chris addiction, what is the best way to do that? The situation is especially delicated in regards to Chris' significant other, who is devoted to Chris and who constantly enables Chris- oftentimes without regard for the rest of Chris' family.

If Chris family were willing to intervene, how could they go about it? What resources would you recommend?

Thanks for the advice.

I really care about my friend and so want to help my friend.
Also I would like to know for future reference in case I ever encounter this situation in my own family.

[Drachen]

I have a question for you.


I strongly suspect that a family member of one of my closest friends is addicted to prescription drugs and I am not sure how to best handle the situation.
For the sake of clarity, I will call the addicted person Chris though that is not the person's real name.

Chris might really have a legitimate illness or Chris might have a far less serious condition Chris is using as an excuse to heavily medicate. It is very hard to discern because all that is known of Chris' illness is what Chris tells people about Chris' illness and what Chris claim the doctors have to say about it.
It should be noted that Chris goes from doctor to doctor, claiming that none of the doctors want to treat Chris and that no doctor will take Chris seriously.


Something else: Chris has symptoms that come and go though Chris claims the condition is permanent. An example of this is memory loss.

While Chris does seem to have some serious ailments, it is not clear whether the person is suffering more from actual body infirmity or from the side effects of the numerous medications they are taking.
And, it is unclear what medications Chris is taking because they have so many and Chris is always switching them.

The more my friend talks to me about Chris' plight, the more I am convinced that the Chris truly has an addiction issue in addition to some other serious, longterm emotional issues.

My friend knows something is amiss with the Chris. However my friend and the rest of Chris' family have been conditioned for a long time by Chris to cater to Chris. Now whatever Chris says is automatically law, no matter what the request. And this seems perfectly natural to the majority of Chris' family. If anyone in Chris' family are aware that Chris is forcing them all to live in a way that is unbalanced and unhealthy, it appears they are to scared to speak up.

I have met Chris. Chris can be incredibly charming. Chris is also not above using manipulation and can be very convincing.

I am concerned that unless/ until Chris family corporately puts their foot down that nothing will change.

And so in the meantime I don't know what my friend can do other than be aware and keep a distance from the danger and heartache Chris is exposing everone to.


This situation has taken a toll on me as well because my friend and I are very close. Chris' drama has both strained and hindered my friend's and my relationship because Chris is so demanding and my friend struggles with feeling obligated to take care of Chris


So I would like to know the following:

How can I be a good support system for my friend?

What are some signs of addiction that my friend should be aware of when it comes to Chris?

If my friend wanted to approach other family members regarding Chris addiction, what is the best way to do that? The situation is especially delicated in regards to Chris' significant other, who is devoted to Chris and who constantly enables Chris- oftentimes without regard for the rest of Chris' family.

If Chris family were willing to intervene, how could they go about it? What resources would you recommend?

Thanks for the advice.

I really care about my friend and so want to help my friend.
Also I would like to know for future reference in case I ever encounter this situation in my own family.

I have an opinion, but will save it since this is B2bs test. When he responds, so will I.

[marini martini]

I have an opinion, but will save it since this is B2bs test. When he responds, so will I.

Oh double dog ditto for me as well!!!:toast

[angel_luv]

Thanks guys!

This thread is a God-send as the situation has been heavily on my mind this week.

[Al Koholik]

I have a... friend. This friend has a drinking problem. He has tried to quit but the memory of the whore that left him is too painful. So I tell this cousin that maybe he should lay off the booze a little. Well he gets mad and starts pissing all over my carpet and takes a dump in my fishtank. Do I need to get help for my neighbor or does he just need a few more drinks to erase that slut bitch that took my car and best friend away?


-Bummed in Boston-

[BacktoBasics]

So I would like to know the following:

How can I be a good support system for my friend?

What are some signs of addiction that my friend should be aware of when it comes to Chris?

If my friend wanted to approach other family members regarding Chris addiction, what is the best way to do that? The situation is especially delicated in regards to Chris' significant other, who is devoted to Chris and who constantly enables Chris- oftentimes without regard for the rest of Chris' family.

If Chris family were willing to intervene, how could they go about it? What resources would you recommend?

Thanks for the advice.

I really care about my friend and so want to help my friend.
Also I would like to know for future reference in case I ever encounter this situation in my own family.Last question first and first question last.

The signs are already there. The switching of meds and doctors is definitely a red flag. However more information is required. Lots of people move from doctor to doctor improperly diagnosed. Tread lightly until you know more.

You're already a good support system for your friend by not being an overbearing know it all ass. The real question that needs to be answered is whether or not the friend has the same inklings as you do about the situation that Chris is in. You said she knew that something was "amiss". You got to establish exactly how she feels. Is she simply turning the cheek because she doesn't want the confrontation/doesn't know how to handle it/is scared of Chris or does she really believe that Chris has health issue and that they've just learned to live with it?

If she shares the same sentiments as you do she may just need a nudge in the right direction to actually do something about. She may have been wanting to do something about it all along but never had the support she needed to proactively make a stand. The first step is for both of you to sit down and begin documenting the behavioral patterns of Chris and draw the appropriate correlations to textbook addictions. Its important here to do the due diligence pertaining to Chris's illness. You can't just follow a hunch. More info is required. You're friend either already knows the details or needs to find them out.

Then create a short list of people that play a significant role in Chris's life. You'll have to objectively look at the list of friends and family and determine who would most likely be willing to indulge in your research of addiction and how it translates to Chris's life. Approach them first. If your case is a strong one reasonable friends and family will likely listen. Once you bring two or three people over to your side the tougher ones will almost be forced to listen to your concerns. There are power in numbers. Once you have a handful of people on board you can confront him. Its tough even for an egotistical dick to ignore a stand of 5 or more good friends and family members.

Flip Side.

If your friend doesn't see things like you do then you're out of luck. If go behind her back to other friends and family you risk souring the relationship. Possibly forever. You'll have to bite your tongue and bear it until she begins to see things your way. Could take years. Could take an overdose. Who knows she may never see things your way.

Are you willing to ruin the friendship on the possibility that it might help Chris? A slim possibility no less. Sometimes it really just is "none of your beeswax".

[BacktoBasics]

I have a... friend. This friend has a drinking problem. He has tried to quit but the memory of the whore that left him is too painful. So I tell this cousin that maybe he should lay off the booze a little. Well he gets mad and starts pissing all over my carpet and takes a dump in my fishtank. Do I need to get help for my neighbor or does he just need a few more drinks to erase that slut bitch that took my car and best friend away?


-Bummed in Boston-All he needs is a fresh piece of ass to distract him. A fun new hobby and some unattached sex likely fixes everything.

[z0sa]

igotnokock shouldn't be taken seriously

[angel_luv]

Thanks very much for the advice B2B. You were very helpful. I have plans to visit with my friend later this week and I will implement your advice.

[I. Hustle]

Hey! That's my job!

[thispego]

yeah, not funny when either of you do it. not even the first time was it funny

[thispego]

wish i could take credit

[I. Hustle]

wish i could take credit

that's sad

[thispego]

lil'mo is a legend around these parts

[I. Hustle]

lil'mo is a legend around these parts

When you said these parts were you motioning to your junk?

[mrsmaalox]

lil'mo is not a funny troll either, thispego

:wow Whoa! lil' mo is thispego? If it's true I guess it makes sense. They are both very clever :tu

[thispego]

:lol hopefully i'm more clever than a cow. lil'mo is not me though, i don't think.

[thispego]

When you said these parts were you motioning to your junk?

like he's a legend around my junnk or he has legendary junk?

[I. Hustle]

like he's a legend around my junk or he has legendary junk?




I forgot about this thread

[CosmicCowboy]

I really like to hunt, fish, drive fast, drink, smoke cigars, and flirt with hot women. My wife says I should grow up and be a good father. Actually that was 25 years ago. Now I'm supposed to grow up and be a good Grandfather.

Personally, I like my life just the way it is. what should I do oh great life counselor?

[BacktoBasics]

I really like to hunt, fish, drive fast, drink, smoke cigars, and flirt with hot women. My wife says I should grow up and be a good father. Actually that was 25 years ago. Now I'm supposed to grow up and be a good Grandfather.

Personally, I like my life just the way it is. what should I do oh great life counselor?
For some people their absolute freedom supersedes anything else. Chances are if she's still with you after 25 years of you being who you are she'll probably tolerate it for a lifetime. I'd keep on keeping on.

Otherwise you should find a respectable middle ground. For some people setting an example for their grandchildren and being a good husband take precident over fast times and self centered "me-time".

You would have to define your priorities before ultimately deciding what path to take.

[CosmicCowboy]

For some people their absolute freedom supersedes anything else. Chances are if she's still with you after 25 years of you being who you are she'll probably tolerate it for a lifetime. I'd keep on keeping on.

Otherwise you should find a respectable middle ground. For some people setting an example for their grandchildren and being a good husband take precident over fast times and self centered "me-time".

You would have to define your priorities before ultimately deciding what path to take.

Hmmm....I dunno. My kids turned out pretty damn good. I know some "perfect" husbands that ended up raising a house full of Asshbeighs.

[BacktoBasics]

Hmmm....I dunno. My kids turned out pretty damn good. I know some "perfect" husbands that ended up raising a house full of Asshbeighs.As long as they participate heavily on an unemployment networking site I think you did okay.

In all seriousness I'm sure you're more than accommodating and considerate to close family. You got one shot at life and there isn't any good reason to remold who you are and what you enjoy for what little pleasure it brings to others. I do what I need to do to make sure my family is happy and taken care of but I don't sacrifice my personality for it.

[mrsmaalox]

Hmmm....I dunno. My kids turned out pretty damn good. I know some "perfect" husbands that ended up raising a house full of Asshbeighs.

Umm, maybe the kids turned out okay in spite of you and not because of you. A lot of men give themselves too much credit and not enough to their childrens' mother.



:lol

[CosmicCowboy]

Umm, maybe the kids turned out okay in spite of you and not because of you. A lot of men give themselves too much credit and not enough to their childrens' mother.



:lol

Naaa. Especially my son. His mother would have killed him in High School if it hadn't been for me.

[I. Hustle]

I heard alvarez = lil mo

[Bender]

so what happened to b2b anyway, did I miss something?

[I. Hustle]

so what happened to b2b anyway, did I miss something?

I heard thispego=B2B

[lil'mo]

what the fuck is this happy horse shit? who gives a shit about b2b aka Sancha