With your current basketball skills, which current NBA team would you fit in?

[Venti Quattro]

The Lakers. Not being biased here but...


I can play point and shooting guard. Small forward sometimes if the other team's SF's are small.
As a reinforcement to bullet point number one, I can honestly assess that I have good court vision.
I can and will shoot better than Sasha Vujacic given the right training + adjustment.
I can play as a boost off the bench or start.
The Lakers need bodies who can play and come in cheap. They can get me for cheap. $100k and we have a deal. Plus I can play.

[JoeTait75]

The Jazz. I'm white and can set a moving screen like nobody's business.

[TDMVPDPOY]

NYK, nothing beats sitting at the end of the bench being a fkn bum while getting paid

[Xylus]

I'm kind of like a destitute man's Ginobili. Or a poor man's Goran Dragic.

-I shoot well from the outside and from midrange, but like to take it to the rack with no regard to my own life.
-I rebound well for my height
-I'm usually the quickest guy in any pick-up game... like 90% of the time.
-I play much, much better when I'm angry.

If I was good enough to play at the NBA level, I'd fit right into Ginobili's role.

[monosylab1k]

The Mavericks. I'm a player in the same mold as Keith Van Horn, Austin Croshere, and Tim Thomas. I've got pretty good size, I enjoy jacking up 3's, and every once in a while I'll pull down a rebound.

[Muser]

New Jersey, I suck.

[ginobili's bald spot]

Any team where I can camp out at the 3 point line and wait for someone to drive and kick. I can hit spot up jumpers all day but that's about it. :lol

[Thunder Dan]

the suns or warriors because I'm fast but don't play defense. I'm white though, so probably the Suns

[DUNCANownsKOBE2]

Indiana cause I'm a white guy who's all hustle. I'd say Utah but they hate Jews over there. I've got good size, can D up like crazy, but offensively not much more than someone who can hit wide open shots.

[Xylus]

DOK, when are we gonna meet up and the UA rec and dominate bitches?

[Venti Quattro]

I can also play in New York's helter-skelter pace but D'Antoni would probably bench me, so no.

[The Gemini Method]

The Warriors

I'm 5'11 and can shoot from distance and mid-range with ruthlessness. I played OLB in HS and for some reason I can't get it done in the paint. I guess I could be like Andrew Bynum...but nearly a foot shorter lol. I am a pretty solid rebounder, though. I'm a better face-to-basket player than back-to-basket...

[DUNCANownsKOBE2]

DOK, when are we gonna meet up and the rec and dominate bitches?


I haven't played at the rec in forever. I always played late, last semester I only got the chance to play once because those cheap fuckers close the place at ten now :depressed. But yeah, as long as you and the other 3 people take care of all the scoring, I'm in!

[biziofromdowntown]

CLand, i'm a good "pass to LBJ" man.

[Xylus]

I haven't played at the rec in forever. I always played late, last semester I only got the chance to play once because those cheap fuckers close the place at ten now :depressed. But yeah, as long as you and the other 3 people take care of all the scoring, I'm in!

I can take care of the scoring load no problem. All I ask is that you play solid D. I can't stand playing with fuckers that don't give a shit and leave their man open on every other play.

I usually go between 6-10pm, almost every day.

[Indazone]

The Fort Wayne Mad Ant's Ballboy. Yeah I can rebound the ball and throw it to the player with the best of em. Joey Meyer would love me!

[DUNCANownsKOBE2]

I can take care of the scoring load no problem. All I ask is that you play solid D. I can't stand playing with fuckers that don't give a shit and leave their man open on every other play.

I usually go between 6-10pm, almost every day.

I'm basically a white Kendrick Perkins. The guy I'm guarding will never be open and will never get offensive rebounds, and I'm a good lane clogger. Offensively, I can post up if I have a 7 inch height advantage, but if a guy my own size is guarding me, I'm fucked.

[badfish22]

i suck at everything except rebounding, but I am a great rebounder.

I used to be a great shooter, but I don't really play much at all anymore.

As for what team, the answer is none. I don't even think many High School teams would want me lol


EDIT: wow post 1,000 already. This is easily the fastest I have gotten to 1k in any online forum. Probably because I have a lot of post that are just :lmao, or just from some of the arguments I get into.

[Venti Quattro]

i suck at everything except rebounding, but I am a great rebounder.

I used to be a great shooter, but I don't really play much at all anymore.

As for what team, the answer is none. I don't even think many High School teams would want me lol
The Lakers might want you because Bynum can't rebound shit

[sonic21]

I'm a good scorer and an above average passer. I suck at defense. So i'm like 60% of the nba PG.

[Xylus]

I can guard speedy, athletic wing players pretty well.

I can't guard anyone who has any skill in the post. I'm 5'11" and 145 lbs., so anyone trying to muscle me inside will have great success.

[DUNCANownsKOBE2]

I can guard speedy, athletic wing players pretty well.

I can't guard anyone who has any skill in the post. I'm 5'11" and 145 lbs., so anyone trying to muscle me inside will have great success.


Well good cause I'm the opposite, the only players I can't guard are the extremely quick ones. I'm 6'2" 210, the only time I've ever really been out muscled in the post was when I was guarding that 325+ pound fatass who plays at the rec.

[monosylab1k]

I'm 6'2" 210, the only time I've ever really been out muscled in the post was when I was guarding that 325+ pound fatass who plays at the rec.

:lol I hate those assholes, the guy who just uses all his blubber to shove you aside in a completely illegal manner, but you can't do anything about it because it's a bitch move to call offensive fouls.

[Venti Quattro]

A problem with me is that I'm slow for a guard. How do I increase my speed and lateral quickness? Should I try those strap weights or should I just hit the pool?

[ffadicted]

Anybody who is interested on a 3 point sharpshooter who can defend the 1 and 2 very well, good passing skills, can run the pick and roll but sucks at isolation offense and doesn't like handling the ball and running the offense.

[DUNCANownsKOBE2]

:lol I hate those assholes, the guy who just uses all his blubber to shove you aside in a completely illegal manner, but you can't do anything about it because it's a bitch move to call offensive fouls.


It's not even basketball. In addition to offensive fouls it's really bush to call 3 in the key but fatasses like that just camp and never leave the paint. My experience with those guys is the best thing to do is swat the entry pass, they're always too slow and lazy to make an extra effort to secure the ball when it's thrown to them.

[Findog]

I'm a Battier/Prince type.

[Venti Quattro]

It's not even basketball. In addition to offensive fouls it's really bush to call 3 in the key but fatasses like that just camp and never leave the paint. My experience with those guys is the best thing to do is swat the entry pass, they're always too slow and lazy to make an extra effort to secure the ball when it's thrown to them.
You could front them. Fatasses as big as that don't have much mobility

[JamStone]

None. Right now, I'm out of shape and haven't balled in a long time.

So I'll think of myself like 10 years ago when I was still playing basketball for 2-3 hours basically every day.

I was a point guard who could score a little but I was also pretty good at getting teammates involved and I felt like I played pretty smart, so I think I could fit on pretty much any team if I had the size and athleticism. But, my ideal situation would probably be as a back-up PG on the Orlando Magic. I was pretty good at breaking down my defender off the dribble, pretty good finisher in traffic, but still looked for kick-outs for open jump shooters when the defense collapsed, and Orlando has a lot of guys that shoot jumpers and that's SVG's gameplan. I also like pushing the ball when I think it's to my team's advantage. And, I love playing with a big man. We all know D12 is still raw offensively, but that's the type of big man I like trying to make better. I think Orlando would suit my skills really well where I could actually help them... again if I had the size and athleticism.

[DUNCANownsKOBE2]

You could front them. Fatasses as big as that don't have much mobility


The problem there is he'd be right in the paint to grab any offensive rebound given he's 2-3 inches taller than me and is really thick. Keeping those guys out of the paint is a must but it sucks energy out of you and requires a constant effort.

[KidCongo]

I'm like Mo Williams with (much) less handling and less shooting. Put me next to a star that likes to kick the ball out when driving to the hoop aka LeBron or Wade.

[monosylab1k]

It's not even basketball. In addition to offensive fouls it's really bush to call 3 in the key but fatasses like that just camp and never leave the paint. My experience with those guys is the best thing to do is swat the entry pass, they're always too slow and lazy to make an extra effort to secure the ball when it's thrown to them.

I just hack the shit out of them. If they're gonna cheat then so am I.

[JamStone]

Lol, this was years ago, but I was playing pick-up in college one day and my team was five guys all about the same height 5'9 to about 6'0. The other team had a grad student who played division III basketball player who was 6'11. Everyone on my team was being a bunch of pussies, so I ended up picking him up. Tall as shit, but wasn't very strong or mobile. I fouled him a lot and he grabbed quite a few boards, but considering I'm 5'10, I did a decent enough job where my team won the pick-up game.

[KidCongo]

I just hack the shit out of them. If they're gonna cheat then so am I.

+ Show them up when you have the ball.

[Venti Quattro]

The problem there is he'd be right in the paint to grab any offensive rebound given he's 2-3 inches taller than me and is really thick. Keeping those guys out of the paint is a must but it sucks energy out of you and requires a constant effort.
Yeah and it requires reading the guy who's making the entry pass to the post.

[The Gemini Method]

Last Christmas, we played a 4-on-4 pick-up game against a team of former HS/College players and managed to win one game out of three. Winning one game, luck or whatever, isn't much, but it sure was to us a rag tag team consisting of 2 Filipinos, 1 White guy, and 1 Mixed guy...

[Venti Quattro]

Last Christmas, we played a 4-on-4 pick-up game against a team of former HS/College players and managed to win one game out of three. Winning one game, luck or whatever, isn't much, but it sure was to us a rag tag team consisting of 2 Filipinos, 1 White guy, and 1 Mixed guy...
Flips are so passionate about basketball but it's too bad they don't have the height for it

[Kamnik]

I think I would fit in well with Blazers, Mavericks or Raptors because they all need some low post scoring, tougness and strength under the rim.

I have a great hook shot which usually can't be blocked. I can defend PFs or centers that are much taller than. I am quite a "must-win" maniac and I am not afraid to play as hard as it is needed so toughness wise I would fit in well. (i don't play dirty though...)

I am not a great rebounder though so I would probably make the Raptors the worst rebounding team in the history of the NBA. :lol

Offcourse my 188cm (6-3) would need at least a 20 cm upgrade for me to be able to do anything. :toast

[The Gemini Method]

I have one Filipino friend who'd be pretty good in the Phillipines, but he's too short for the game here. Speed and range like crazy he is the same exact height/weight as Manny Pacquiao...

[DUNCANownsKOBE2]

I just hack the shit out of them. If they're gonna cheat then so am I.


Idk why I don't do that.


I'm not sure how much of a problem this is in Texas :lol, but Asians completely ruin pickup basketball whenever they play. Their offense consists of lowering their head, running at the rim while taking a good 4-5 steps after they stop dribbling, and calling a foul whenever they don't make the shot or get blocked, regardless of whether or not they were actually fouled. On defense, they don't hesitate to hack the shit out of you and call traveling when half the time it wasn't traveling.

[JamStone]

When I was at Tulane, the Men's basketball team would come into the gym in the spring time after their season was over. This was in the late 90s. It was not uncommon for a group of the CURRENT varsity men's basketball team to lose to some of the pick-up teams at the gym. And, I'm dead serious. Not former college players. Current college players. Tulane sucked bad during that time.

[Pero]

I can guard speedy, athletic wing players pretty well.

I can't guard anyone who has any skill in the post. I'm 5'11" and 145 lbs., so anyone trying to muscle me inside will have great success.

You're about my height and weight haha.

For myself I suck a lot right now so I can't see myself on any team. :lol
Practically didn't touch the basketball for 3 years. The years before that I went through periods, first the only thing I knew was to shoot threes, then I suddenly developed a post game, and lastly I was good at dribbling & penetration (but not that good at finishing, I remember my friends cursing how I can dribble everyone, get to an easy layup and then miss...)

Unfortunately when I was in one period I seemed to forget what I was able to do in another period. :lol

[The Gemini Method]

I once had the fortune of being picked up on a team with Ed O'Bannon, Cameron Dollar, and some other guy from UCLA...I never had to do a thing lol except putbacks and pass lol...I'm a USC guy through and through, but I never had the opportunity to play with the USC bball players...

[Venti Quattro]

I have one Filipino friend who'd be pretty good in the Phillipines, but he's too short for the game here. Speed and range like crazy he is the same exact height/weight as Manny Pacquiao...
Exactly the way the Filipino game goes. Plus they pattern their games to the NBA instead of the Euroleague or FIBA where they can compensate for their lack of height with solid fundamentals.

[Pero]

I'm not sure how much of a problem this is in Texas :lol, but Asians completely ruin pickup basketball whenever they play. Their offense consists of lowering their head, running at the rim while taking a good 4-5 steps after they stop dribbling, and calling a foul whenever they don't make the shot or get blocked, regardless of whether or not they were actually fouled. On defense, they don't hesitate to hack the shit out of you and call traveling when half the time it wasn't traveling.

:lol

[jonnybravo]

I can guard speedy, athletic wing players pretty well.

I can't guard anyone who has any skill in the post. I'm 5'11" and 145 lbs., so anyone trying to muscle me inside will have great success.


You might want to head on over to the Lakers training facility in El Segundo. We can use a defender at the 1. You can't possibly be worse than the trash we have there now on defense.

[DPG21920]

Xylus, aren't you Asian?

[BadOdor]

Sons, I suck bad at basketball. I've been watching for several years now, ever since I came to the U.S, but only started playing a year ago. I got no handles, and I shoot like Joakim Noah.

I could do as good a job as vuyachich does though.

[Mavs_man_41]

i'm the white version of jason terry but with a little less shooting capabilities and a lockdown defender. same streakiness and everything. I can hit 10 in a row from nba range or go 1-10 on any given day. although i can play college division II but never nba level

[Xylus]

Xylus, aren't you Asian?

No sir, white as bread.

[23LeBronJames23]

I can make about 70% of the threes I shoot if you give me time to practice
I got handles still need work on em though
Im 6ft and 160 pounds
i look pretty weak like kevin durant and kind of play like him too.
And Im a SG probably.
and i have no doubt that im better than vujiajijch or whatever his name is
and i would love too play for Cavs or Minnesota

[Chieflion]

It is hopeless. I will never be in the NBA. If I am, I will be just like Earl Boykins literally.

[TIMMYD!]

I'm not biased but I play like Tim. I'm 5'11" and can post you up and finish with a hook shot off the glass but if you leave me open, I will hit that open 15 footer.

[Pero]

Guys who are saying you're better than Vujacic, basically you're saying you could average more than 10ppg in a season in the NBA. Get real.

[Spursfan092120]

Whatever team needs a guy who can't run for shit anymore, but can hit spot up 3 pointers like nobody's business...damn, I need to get back into shape.

[IronMexican]

The Nuggets:

Just let me get a couple tats and they will accept me.

[namlook]

Guys who are saying you're better than Vujacic, basically you're saying you could average more than 10ppg in a season in the NBA. Get real.

The only chance anyone here has to best Sasha is by posting up the gatorade cooler and distributing uncontested drinks to the players.

[gaKNOW!blee]

whichever team likes guys who are lazy and never hustle.

[namlook]

It is hopeless. I will never be in the NBA. If I am, I will be just like Earl Boykins literally.

Can you bench press 315 lbs like Earl too?

[Chieflion]

Can you bench press 315 lbs like Earl too?
That doesn't matter when you are 5 foot 6. Of course I can't.

[hater]

:lmao :lmao :lmao :lmao :lmao :lmao :lmao :lmao


what a stupid thread


these fat motherfuckers coulnt even break into a special olympics team

[23LeBronJames23]

Guys who are saying you're better than Vujacic, basically you're saying you could average more than 10ppg in a season in the NBA. Get real.

vujajich is not avereging 10 ppg

[BadOdor]

vujajich is not avereging 10 ppg

He did at one point, dumb shit.

[23LeBronJames23]

He did at one point, dumb shit.

we are not talking about the past foo

[BadOdor]

we are not talking about the past foo

Do you have reading comprehension problems, lebron-nut hugger?

At one point, he averaged 10 ppg in the NBA. You think any of the posters here could do it, fuckface? :bang

[23LeBronJames23]

do you have reading comprehension problems, lebron-nut hugger?

At one point, he averaged 10 ppg in the nba. You think any of the posters here could do it, fuckface? :bang

we are not talking about the past

[BadOdor]

we are not talking about the past

Talk to me again when you graduate from highschool.

[spursfan1000]

New York, I am great at throwing bad shots up

[Unholy Turkey]

I'd be wonderful with the Vipers.

[iggypop123]

it would have to be with a title contender like the lakers. they are desperate and cash strapped so their 15th guy cant be expensive. thats where i come in. i can compete on practice and work on my sitting skills during games. then i have the honor of being the human victory cigar and i make one 3 a month

[jacobdrj]

The Lakers, because they don't need me.

[Rogue]

I'm a Nash/Barea type player, except shorter and slower. I've also got awesome vision of the court and equally great shooting as Nash if not better. I'm restricted to PG due mainly to my size but I'm too slow for run-and-gun form like the Suns with the exorbitant weight i've gained over the past 2 years and a half. Hence the Mavs should be the team i fit best I suppose, and that's a big reason why I love the boys in blue this hard.

[FkLA]

this thread is fucking retarded...should be more like with your current skills what jv high school team would you fit in.

[Rummpd]

Lakers at least I am not soft like their entire bench.

[BUMP]

The only team i'd fit in with is the Cavs or Lakers

I'd just walk the ball up and hand it to Lebron or Kobe the whole time. If they pass back then i'll dump it into Shaq or Gasol :toast

[Killakobe81]

Honestly? The spurs (the ones with Bowen), the Celts (though not a douche), ROX or Cavs
Players i have been compared to: Mike Cooper, Raja Bell, Bruce Bowen, Gary Payton and Alonzo Mourning I think GP & Zo are most accurate ... On dfense iF someone trashtalked me I was GP ...in your face yapping sticking to you like a glove ...on offfense Ugly jump hooks, but a nice Tim duncan bank shot ....
Zo probably captures me best all around though a "mini" version or wait a righjty Josh smith I had hops ...a shaky jumper but great defense not a great FT shooter either but I could steal, board and dunk off a lob (HS/College) Now? my game is more Ron artest with less power ...

[lefty]

Spurs/ 3rd (backup) PG / clutch scorer

- I'm small

- My ball handling is steady PG like, I can't crossover NBA style wothout traveling....wait, they don't call those in the NBA, so I can definitely do crossover dribbles in the NBA

- My mid-range shooting is good, but my 3 pt shooting is average

- I can miss 1000 shots in a game, airball and shit, but I always make tough spectacular game-winning shots

[Killakobe81]

I used to ball with filipinos all the time quick lots of hearty and some had crazy hops my HS PF was a flip and he was badass but no college offers ...I played in t he SF valley a few few years ahead of Gilbert Arenas and we used to beat his ass .... pickup and official games ...