PDA

View Full Version : Honest Synopsis That Should put an empty feeling in your stomach



F_U_Buddy
01-03-2010, 03:16 PM
This Synopsis is for Western Conference Pretenders -- the Eastern Conference coming soon...


The Dallas Mavericks
Erick Dampier (http://sports.espn.go.com/nba/players/profile?playerId=181) - Less than avg center only used for filler
Drew Gooden (http://sports.espn.go.com/nba/players/profile?playerId=1711) - Just happy to have been picked up no real game changer here
Josh Howard (http://sports.espn.go.com/nba/players/profile?playerId=2006) - Weed-aholic that hates America and the national anthem can’t get his head right ; emotionally unstable
Jason Kidd (http://sports.espn.go.com/nba/players/profile?playerId=429) -- Good in his prime but a bit over the hill and will be over paid going forward. Expect declining productivity over the next few months let along years.
Shawn Marion (http://sports.espn.go.com/nba/players/profile?playerId=510) -- His desire should be called into question, extremely inconsistent may be secretly hurt he didn’t get a max deal and this could be affecting his performance.
Dirk Nowitzki (http://sports.espn.go.com/nba/players/profile?playerId=609) – Already showing signs of slowing down how long will he last and can he lead a team to a championship
Jason Terry (http://sports.espn.go.com/nba/players/profile?playerId=841) -- One of the those players that’s hot and cold as the wind blows. Has a childish mentality on the court.
F_U's Diagnosis: this team lacks discipline, toughness, and determination to ultimately get the job done.
F_U's Prognosis: Will make the play-offs and be entertaining for a round or two


The San Antonio Spurs
Tim Duncan (http://sports.espn.go.com/nba/players/profile?playerId=215) -- Still a good PF but clearly aging and not as mobil or effective as in previous years. Sliding down hill offensively and suspect on the defensive end of the ball . (he’s lucky he didn’t play in the Hakeem Olajuwon era because if he did we wouldn’t know his name)
Michael Finley (http://sports.espn.go.com/nba/players/profile?playerId=242) -- A golden girl. Living out his pre-retirement fantasy. Can get excited every 15 games or so and surprise you with nice 3 point shots…
Richard Jefferson (http://sports.espn.go.com/nba/players/profile?playerId=1006) – Despite being in the closet he was a surprisingly decent pickup but has no real fight or manhood about himself. Will thrill the Spur fans (with gay like delight) when the teams plight seems darkest. Will occasionally show mild bravado to throw the fans off…When it counts though he runs scared.
Antonio McDyess (http://sports.espn.go.com/nba/players/profile?playerId=530) – Just happy he’s still in the league.
Manu Ginobilli – Inconsistent, has lost several steps and has even lost a flopping step. Suspect mentally…
Tony Parker (http://sports.espn.go.com/nba/players/profile?playerId=1015) – Of all the spurs I actually like this guy the most as a basketball fan. The only real bright spot in Spurland in my opinion. Just too soft at times everytime I turn around it seems he’s hurt or something.
F_U's Diagnosis: old, inconsistent although playing ok as of late. Either this team is coasting to the play-offs (doing just enough) or they have serious X’s and O’s issues that need to be worked out. Doesn’t seem focused…
F_U's Prognosis: will make the play-offs but lack of killer instinct during the regular season will come back to haunt this team during the play-offs..

The Denver Nuggets

Chris Andersen (http://sports.espn.go.com/nba/players/profile?playerId=1135) -- All tatted up and chest get’s all puffed out because he’s playing with black guys who are self-proclaimed thugs…Chris however seems like he’s a secret Neo Nazi…ok defensively and lacks focus and consistency…

Carmelo Anthony (http://sports.espn.go.com/nba/players/profile?playerId=1975) -- a great offensive player but doesn’t seem to have much IQ in other areas of the game. He seems as if he focuses strictly on proving he’s in the same class as Lebron, Duncan and Wade…(notice I didn’t mention Kobe because Kobe is currently in MJ’s class)

Chauncey Billups (http://sports.espn.go.com/nba/players/profile?playerId=63) – Plays for the big shot but not very consistent at it…Hot and Cold…kind of flakey…

Nene Hilario (http://sports.espn.go.com/nba/players/profile?playerId=1713) – doesn’t know who he is…a decent big man..

Kenyon Martin (http://sports.espn.go.com/nba/players/profile?playerId=515) -- nothing makes me laugh harder than when he shoots jumpers..he actually shoots them like he has a pure shot…

J.R. Smith (http://sports.espn.go.com/nba/players/profile?playerId=2444) – NBA resident thug and murderer..but has a dam good shot when he’s on…also likes to dance like Lebronze…He did the funky chicken last year against LA during the play-offs after a Nugget win…Kobe said afterwards that the dance was nice…need I say more…


F_U's Diagnosis: Zero discipline mainly due to their head coach. Doesn’t seem to know how to approach the game seriously low IQ as a TEAM. Although the addition of Billups raised their collective IQ’s…
F_U's Prognosis: As Kobe previously stated …after the Lakers meet them for the 3rd yr in a row it will have been 3 straight years. (you get the reference)

Notable Mentions:

Houston Rockets -- They're scrappy and play hard and they believe...they have team pride and spirit but let's face it -- not title contenders. They'll be distracted by T-MAC this year and then when Ming comes back and go's down again the distractions will start all over. Their owner seems smug as well...and the fans seem like drunk racists...

Phoenix Suns look good but I think they know in their heart of hearts their window closed years ago. Nash will do his whirling and twirling act for another season to nowhere and then Stoudamire will wind up in LA where he's always wanted to be.

NO. Hornets -- Just wanted to say hello to Chris Paul...and I send my condolences on the season. ( I see you Hornet's fans do your thing) :hat

Findog
01-03-2010, 03:22 PM
All this effort for something I scrolled past and didn't bother to read.

Venti Quattro
01-03-2010, 03:23 PM
I didn't bother to read. Too long and too nonsense.

badfish22
01-03-2010, 03:26 PM
good read. I read it thoroughly.

z0sa
01-03-2010, 03:29 PM
tldr

Mavs_man_41
01-03-2010, 03:31 PM
"notice I didn’t mention Kobe because Kobe is currently in MJ’s class" :lol

blkroadrunners
01-03-2010, 03:36 PM
Wow, I can see you'll be having a career w/ ESPN writing very shortly.:lol

DAF86
01-03-2010, 03:46 PM
Manu Ginobilli – Suspect mentally…

:wtf

Venti Quattro
01-03-2010, 03:49 PM
:wtf
He's accusing Many of being mentally deranged

F_U_Buddy
01-03-2010, 03:49 PM
:wtf


mentally suspect....mentally weak...

DAF86
01-03-2010, 03:53 PM
mentally suspect....mentally weak...

I know what you mean, that's why I put the :wtf

Are you crazy or just haven't seen Manu enough?

Greg Oden
01-03-2010, 03:55 PM
lol at this guy being butthurt over someone talking bad about Manu.

DAF86
01-03-2010, 04:03 PM
lol at this guy being butthurt over someone talking bad about Manu.

Did you enjoy the Bills game?

F_U_Buddy
01-03-2010, 04:04 PM
I know what you mean, that's why I put the :wtf

Are you crazy or just haven't seen Manu enough?

listen I didn't say he was a scrub I said he was weak mentally and if I'm not mistaken he even recently hinted as much himself...and being weak mentally will cost you games that's why Laker Brass should be trying hard as hell to get rid of Farmar and Vujacic, and Walton...

Smooth Criminal
01-03-2010, 04:11 PM
:wtf

That one threw me off too

Greg Oden
01-03-2010, 04:11 PM
Did you enjoy the Bills game?

Yes. As a Bills fan, any win is enjoyable.

DPG21920
01-03-2010, 04:16 PM
DAF, there is nothing to question because he is just saying thing to get a rise out of people. Quit falling for it.

DAF86
01-03-2010, 04:17 PM
listen I didn't say he was a scrub I said he was weak mentally and if I'm not mistaken he even recently hinted as much himself...and being weak mentally will cost you games that's why Laker Brass should be trying hard as hell to get rid of Farmar and Vujacic, and Walton...

Calling Manu a scrub would have been less ridiculous than calling him mentally weak.

DAF86
01-03-2010, 04:18 PM
DAF, there is nothing to question because he is just saying thing to get a rise out of people. Quit falling for it.

Maybe you're right, if that's the case good job buddy (but I don't think he is though)

DPG21920
01-03-2010, 04:22 PM
Trust me. He is.

Chieflion
01-03-2010, 06:02 PM
Son, are you one of those Laker nuthuggers on ESPN or other sports network?

F_U_Buddy
01-03-2010, 06:26 PM
Son, are you one of those Laker nuthuggers on ESPN or other sports network?


in case you haven't noticed BSPN is not on the Lakers or Kobe's side..and no my opinions only get a rise out of those those who can't think independently or whose so blind to the obvious they see all criticisms through the cynism lens...but I understand....Laker hate can have that effect one you...



and no not all Laker fans agree with me or my style...that's cool...because take note of this and perhaps add it to your sig: "All Laker fans that disagree with me substantively are reminiscent of the chair of the republican party - Michael Steele. Sometimes you just need a token face to advance your cause." -- F_U Buddy...:married:

Agloco
01-04-2010, 12:19 AM
5th grade reading comprehension test flashback.

jag
01-04-2010, 12:33 AM
I feel like you just watched ESPN, heard some shoddy analysis and then slapped this thread together. You basically tried to create an analytical thread without actually analyzing a single player.

There are so many things you could have criticized with each of these teams...yet you practically missed all of them and chose to provide irrelevant garbage. Your opinions are pretty revealing when it comes to your overall lack of any kind of basketball knowledge.

ElNono
01-04-2010, 12:35 AM
Is this guy supposed to be funny or insightful?
And please, somebody just post the digest version. Too much junk to read....

tlongII
01-04-2010, 12:39 AM
What? No synopsis of the Blazers? :lol

jag
01-04-2010, 12:40 AM
Is this guy supposed to be funny or insightful?
And please, somebody just post the digest version. Too much junk to read....

He mentioned how Tim Duncan has obviously lost a step (i assume since last season) and then he mentioned how Tony Parker is the bright spot this season.

jag
01-04-2010, 12:42 AM
Gotta love player analysis from posters who don't know dick about the players. Dirk is obviously showing signs of slowing down...even though his stats are practically identical to last years.

Dunc n Dave
01-04-2010, 12:43 AM
http://images.icanhascheezburger.com/completestore/2009/5/25/128877553980112094.jpg

Smooth Criminal
01-04-2010, 12:49 AM
I feel like you just watched ESPN, heard some shoddy analysis and then slapped this thread together. You basically tried to create an analytical thread without actually analyzing a single player.

There are so many things you could have criticized with each of these teams...yet you practically missed all of them and chose to provide irrelevant garbage. Your opinions are pretty revealing when it comes to your overall lack of any kind of basketball knowledge.

Pretty much this.

Leetonidas
01-04-2010, 01:27 AM
http://i22.photobucket.com/albums/b331/pwnjoo1/failedThread.jpg

MiamiHeat
01-04-2010, 01:30 AM
leetonidas lmao i love that comic strip

would be great if it was a real series

Findog
01-04-2010, 01:39 AM
Dirk is obviously showing signs of slowing down...even though his stats are practically identical to last years.

:lol

Oh yeah, he's slowing down alright...when any Mavs fan could tell you he's playing the best ball of his career, even better than 2006-2007.

Findog
01-04-2010, 01:40 AM
He mentioned how Tim Duncan has obviously lost a step (i assume since last season) and then he mentioned how Tony Parker is the bright spot this season.

So in other words, he was within 180 degrees of a good take.

jag
01-04-2010, 01:47 AM
So in other words, he was within 180 degrees of a good take.

:lol

Basically. He would have been right if he said the exact opposite of what he actually said.

Findog
01-04-2010, 01:48 AM
:lol

Basically. He would have been right if he said the exact opposite of what he actually said.

What's hilarious is that he's a troll trying to get a rise out of other posters and make them angry, but he ends up just owning himself.

RuffnReadyOzStyle
01-04-2010, 02:04 AM
5th grade reading comprehension test flashback.

That's the putdown I was looking for! :tu :lmao

That people waste their time writing crap like this amazes me... I mean, if you are in the least bit funny or insightful, go for it! But when you're as sharp as a sledgehammer, as tedious as an episode of [insert name of any 'reality' TV show here], and apparently committed to disastrously mixing metaphors and ignoring any form of syntax, keep your thoughts in your head. :nope

Trainwreck2100
01-04-2010, 02:32 AM
i got an empty feeling in my stomach, but it was one of those "dear God this is so stupid how can humanity floutish with such stupidity existing" feelings, like one would get watching a Jared commercial. Or most recently those awful pocket commercials

MiamiHeat
01-04-2010, 02:39 AM
http://www.bunrab.com/yummychow/Reviews/reviewimages/MiGrullense/migru_tacos.jpg


I had about 5 of these and about 3 hours later it sure gave me an empty feeling in my stomach

TinTin
01-04-2010, 02:43 AM
What? No synopsis of the Blazers? :lol

LMAO :lol

Guessing ESPN didn't do their story

DUNCANownsKOBE2
01-04-2010, 10:19 AM
This guy creates too many threads. He should join Cubby on the banned list.

Why So Serious
01-04-2010, 10:25 AM
:troll

RuffnReadyOzStyle
01-04-2010, 08:24 PM
i got an empty feeling in my stomach, but it was one of those "dear God this is so stupid how can humanity floutish with such stupidity existing" feelings, like one would get watching a Jared commercial. Or most recently those awful pocket commercials

News flash - humanity is not "flourishing". Sure, it looks like it is, but that's all an illusion because we are doing it unsustainably. Most of our "prosperity" comes from environmental systems that we have consumed or destroyed, not to mention the house of cards financial system we've become locked into. These matters will catch up with us all very soon... you can already see it happening if your eyes are open.

BadOdor
01-04-2010, 10:54 PM
News flash - humanity is not "flourishing". Sure, it looks like it is, but that's all an illusion because we are doing it unsustainably. Most of our "prosperity" comes from environmental systems that we have consumed or destroyed, not to mention the house of cards financial system we've become locked into. These matters will catch up with us all very soon... you can already see it happening if your eyes are open.

Son, here you go again gaying up this thread. Go post your green nonsense in the political forum, you aussy homo.