Should I tell my girlfriend that I find her weight gain unattractive???

[FalleNxWiZarDx]

Is there any point in telling my girlfriend the truth about my feelings about her weight gain?

My gf has put on about 40 lbs over the 6 months we've been together. She carries it very well, but it's definitely noticeable. Her legs and thighs are already bigger then mine, and her eating habits haven't changed....

She constantly asks me if I find it unattractive, and I have been reassuring her that I'm just as attracted to her as I was before.

But that's not true. While she definitely still turns my crank, I do find her new figure less attractive. Recently she tried on an old skirt and it didn't fit, which brought on an abortive fit of extreme dieting (lasted about a day).

I told her that she should come and work out with me (I am extremely active, playing basketball), that we can work together to come up with a sensible diet and exercise plan, and although she agrees, nothing really comes of it.

While she is very successful in life so far, she is an extremely lazy (if talented) person, and doesn't really do anything unless she has to. Should I nudge her more? Is there any point in telling her the truth when she asks? My feeling is that it will cause her +++++anxiety and trigger an irrational attempt at extreme dieting and exercise, not to mention insecurity about our relationship and herself.

[Dr. Gonzo]

Learn to love it because it sounds like she isn't changing.

[ToughActinTinactin]

Lazy AND successful? She's a keeper.

[FalleNxWiZarDx]

Lazy AND successful? She's a keeper.

tell me about it, she also plays Xbox live more then i do

[JudynTX]

How much do you weigh?

[Xylus]

Is your girlfriend's mom a big woman?

[IronMexican]

If this isn't thread of the week, I don't know what is.

[BlackSwordsMan]

tell me about it, she also plays Xbox live mroe then i do

my kinda woman

[mavs>spurs2]

tell her. there's no use spending the rest of your life married to someone you are totally unattracted to for the rest of your life just because you are too big of a pussy to do something about it. 40 pounds is VERY excessive and something should be done regardless of your relationship, if not for that then for her health. Even if she was a thin 125 before, 165 is too much for a young adult female, assuming she's around normal height and weight before the weight gain.

[Drachen]

There are two ways to go about this. If you really want her to lose the weight, tell her. She will lose it after she breaks up with you and decides that she wants to lose it to spite you and show you what you are missing.

If you want to stay with her, learn to love the woman inside the woman.

[dirk4mvp]

When I read this thread, I want more.

[Bukefal]

:lol You should be very careful when talking to your GF about her weight. There is almost no way to tell this in a sweet normal way, without getting a wave on you afterwards. What you can do is be silent on this, but take her out to do things, sporting together, jogging, snowboarding, swimming etc... And it's fun and it's good for exercise and losing weight.

[Sportcamper]

I find that honesty is always the best policy…If your girl asks; do these pants make me look fat? Tell her no, not anymore fat than you are…

And while some men find big rear ends & huge thighs attractive, you find it a bit repulsive…Girls would rather have honesty over flattery any day…

[mavs>spurs2]

:lol You should be very careful when talking to your GF about her weight. There is almost no way to tell this in a sweet normal way, without getting a wave on you afterwards.

So he should just keep his mouth shut and spend the rest of his days with a woman he's not attracted to and will probably only get bigger and bigger as time goes on? I know it's a sensitive subject, but is it really fair to the OP? If the chick feels that she can always fall back on the OP no matter what she looks like, she will never have any incentive to get back into any kind of shape but round.

[Blake]

Is there any point in telling my girlfriend the truth about my feelings about her weight gain?

My gf has put on about 40 lbs over the 6 months we've been together. She carries it very well, but it's definitely noticeable. Her legs and thighs are already bigger then mine, and her eating habits haven't changed....


wait another 3 months. If she loses anywhere from 7-8 lbs in one shot in a hospital bed, then it's probably something else, pops.

[760Spursfan]

How much do you weigh?


Did you ever answer this question???

I know you say your "active" and all but I have seen "active" people with a few extra lbs.

[mardigan]

Just stop banging her. She'll either get the hint or put on more weight, which gives you an even easier out.

[Xylus]

Just stop banging her. She'll either get the hint or put on more weight, which gives you an even easier out.

Or bang her daily, nightly, and ever-so-rightly. Good way to lose the weight is to fuck it away.

[JudynTX]

Did you ever answer this question???

I know you say your "active" and all but I have seen "active" people with a few extra lbs.

Nope, he hasn't answered this yet.

[angel_luv]

If the gf has bad eating habits she could quickly grow to an unhealthy weight.

The longer a bad habit continues, the harder it is to break.

If it were me, I would rather be told after I had gained 30 pounds then have people keep silent so I continue and end up 130 pounds overweight.

Some weight gain is to be expected with age and other factors such as childbirth.

But with the gf it sounds as if maybe she is eating due to stress or boredom and her weight gain can and ought to be managed better.

Be careful though in your approach. Weight comments, even those that are valid and kindly meant, are very hard to take.

The idea of planning out dates where fitness is involved seems a good one to me.
But make the dates something she would enjoy doing- like walking around an outdoor mall once a week if she likes to shop. Then go out to eat some where that has good healthy food.

[mardigan]

Or bang her daily, nightly, and ever-so-rightly. Good way to lose the weight is to fuck it away.

:lol
Touché

[Bukefal]

So he should just keep his mouth shut and spend the rest of his days with a woman he's not attracted to and will probably only get bigger and bigger as time goes on? I know it's a sensitive subject, but is it really fair to the OP? If the chick feels that she can always fall back on the OP no matter what she looks like, she will never have any incentive to get back into any kind of shape but round.

Yeah I know its a shitty situation. On one side you want to tell her and of course its good to tell and to be honest, but on the other hand, if he tells it, its indeed sensitive and he already has a feeling that it will trigger a anxiety, insecurity and extreme dieting, so if he does tell, maybe it will get so much worse and he would have regret it that he said it in the first place.

[I. Hustle]

Here is what you do. Leave a trail of twinkies from the bedroom to the street. Once she has picked up the scent and starts to devour them one by one start to follow her. Don't worry because she will be so into eating the twinkies that she won't even notice you. Once she is outside then quickly shut the door and lock it! Make sure you have a really heavy door or it is secured because more than likely she has grown a horn by now and will ram the door splitting it like paper.

[JoeChalupa]

Your love must not be thicker than her weight gain.

[mavs>spurs2]

Here is what you do. Leave a trail of twinkies from the bedroom to the street. Once she has picked up the scent and starts to devour them one by one start to follow her. Don't worry because she will be so into eating the twinkies that she won't even notice you. Once she is outside then quickly shut the door and lock it! Make sure you have a really heavy door or it is secured because more than likely she has grown a horn by now and will ram the door splitting it like paper.

:lmao

[angel_luv]

Your love must not be thicker than her weight gain.

:lol

Good one!

[FalleNxWiZarDx]

How much do you weigh?


im 6'2 weigh around 190 :toast

[Shaolin-Style]

This is one of those subtle kind of things you have to be careful with.

Try harder to get her to go work out with you and try some healthier food with you. Help her while helping yourself at the same time whether you need it or not and you'll come off less douchebaggy and is the best method imo.

[BacktoBasics]

Whoever said learn to live with it had it predominantly right. Some nudging might help but if you piss her off it'll just backfire and if you leave her it'll become her life mission to gain her hot figure back and fuck everything sight.

Its pretty much a failed mission no matter how you go about it. She has to be the one that wants to change.

It sounds like she doesn't work. You might consider starting a business just to give her something to do. It worked when my wife got fat from having the boy and now she's thin again and we have a some good income from the business.

This is what it takes to be a man friendo. You gotta move worlds and create businesses just to keep the womens from overflowing with lazy. There not as evolved as we are. Its all about how we compensate for their shortcomings.

[JudynTX]

im 6'2 weigh around 190 :toast

Are you hot? :lol

[Trainwreck2100]

http://imagemacros.files.wordpress.com/2009/11/no-fat-chicks1.jpg

you must consult the proper authorities

[ashbeeigh]

Have you brought up the health issues that her weight gain may cause? Is it an unhealthy weight gain or was she just really skinny before and now she's starting to get chubby (I say chubby but to you this is fat obviously).

Maybe this is a thyroid issue if her eating habits haven't changed. Lots of women have thyroid problems. Is she on the pill? Lots of girls gain weight because of the hormones in the pill.

Express your concern for her health and her future, if you do confront her. Don't just say, "Hey baby you're fat and it needs to change."

[Jekka]

Simple answer: no. Never tell a woman that her weight gain is unattractive if you have any idea that you might want to marry this woman or start a family one day, because that shit can lead to long term issues of security and trust. Telling a woman that you find her unattractive is a fast route to turning your girlfriend into a crazy person, and for good reason. Women grow up in a different world than men do, and more of our "worth" is placed in how we look, and no matter how progressive a woman might be, it still hits women a LOT harder to take a comment like that than it will most men.

If you're concerned more about how attractive she is than how healthy she is, then that's sort of a problem. That big of a weight gain in that much time is more unhealthy than anything else, and it seems smarter to continue to invite her out to physical activities that she would enjoy, and to be more proactive about healthy food choices (i.e. cook a healthy dinner for you both before anyone has a chance to pull leftover pizza out of the fridge).

Also, the sexercise diet is a great one :tu

[JoeChalupa]

The wife and I and the kids have been doing wii fit and walking more than ever before. I've never made a comment about my wife's weight gain over the past years as she still looks very hot to me!!

[I. Hustle]

OK I misread you it seems like you want to keep her. Here are some other ideas that might help.

- Everyday start placing her food bowl higher and higher so that eventually she is jumping to get to it. This will get her moving, stretching, and excercising thus helping her lose weight.

- Take her favorite food and strap it to the back of the car. Once she catches a whiff she will try her hardest to get to it. Start off going about 15 miles an hour and work your way up.

- Take some of those excercise bands and bolt them to the ground and place them over her forehead. Then take a hamburger and with a piece of string hang it from the ceiling so that it is right about where her knees are. She will keep struggling trying to get it and will eventually work off some of the weight or snap the band.

- Put some hotdogs on a wheel just out of her reach. As she goes for the hotdog the wheel will spin causing her to make a circular motion with her arms. If you put some ice next to her you will save on your cooling bill.

[BacktoBasics]

Come on guys he said he still issues her boners so he's obviously is still attracted to her even though she's plumping out.

You're going to have to create a diversion pal. Its the only thing that will work. You are going to have to create activities that are indicative of her slimming down. And you're gonna have to not be obvious about it.

[BacktoBasics]

Come on guys he said he still issues her boners so he's obviously still attracted to her even though she's plumping out.

You're going to have to create a diversion pal. Its the only thing that will work. You are going to have to create activities that are indicative of her slimming down. And you're gonna have to not be obvious about it.

[fraga]

Lock her in the basement...

[Xylus]

You should show her this thread, and shame her into dieting.

[The Reckoning]

ask her to run with you in the mornings or take her to the gym with you so yall can "spend some time together without focusing on work." girls usually find it attractive to hitch a ride with you to the gym.

if she doesnt want to, then you can say that yall never do anything together and split.

[ashbeeigh]

You should show her this thread, and shame her into dieting.


I was going to say the same type of thing. I hope his girlfriend doesn't know he goes online to some random message board to get advice on his girlfriend's weight. That sure would be anxiety inducing.

[bostonguy]

Here is what you do. Leave a trail of twinkies from the bedroom to the street. Once she has picked up the scent and starts to devour them one by one start to follow her. Don't worry because she will be so into eating the twinkies that she won't even notice you. Once she is outside then quickly shut the door and lock it! Make sure you have a really heavy door or it is secured because more than likely she has grown a horn by now and will ram the door splitting it like paper.

:lmao:lmao

[BacktoBasics]

I'm sure big pharma will create an "internet" pill to deal with the anxiety of being shamed publicly.

Millions to be made and stuff.

[Bukefal]

I was going to say the same type of thing. I hope his girlfriend doesn't know he goes online to some random message board to get advice on his girlfriend's weight. That sure would be anxiety inducing.

Lol yeah, you would get F*cked twice. Once for not telling her and not being honest and second for having a problem with her weight.

I hope for you she wont read this :lol

[ashbeeigh]

Lol yeah, you would get F*cked twice. Once for not telling her and not being honest and second for having a problem with her weight.

I hope for you she wont read this :lol

Fingers crossed he clears his cookies...and that there aren't any in the house.

[Blake]

im 6'2 weigh around 190 :toast

dude, you're Norbit.

[I. Hustle]

Here is what you do. Start randomly putting up mirrors all over the house. Now one of two things are going to happen. One, she will start to see herself more and more and get motivated to start losing weight so that she can admire herself instead of try to hide.
Or two, she will be angered by the presence of another female which will result in alot of broken glass around your place.

[Blake]

- Put some hotdogs on a wheel just out of her reach. As she goes for the hotdog the wheel will spin causing her to make a circular motion with her arms. If you put some ice next to her you will save on your cooling bill.

hell, hook her up with that wheel to the generator which runs the A/C unit.

maybe the energy company will actually buy back energy from you

[I. Hustle]

hell, hook her up with that wheel to the generator which runs the A/C unit.

maybe the energy company will actually buy back energy from you

That is an awesome idea. Just think of all the households that can be powered by this method just here in SA alone. We can call it Fatergy.

[JamStone]

I would tell her but it really depends on her. If she's an insecure person who can't take criticism, then it has to be done very tactfully. But, if she's a strong woman who appreciates honesty, then I really confront her about it. But, as many have suggested, get ready for a shit storm, including her telling you how small your dick is and possibly her breaking up with you.

Now when it comes to tactfully approaching her, I would definitely take the health angle. You don't have to tell her that she's starting to get unattractive with the added weight. But, you should definitely tell her that her weight gain in such a short amount of time concerns you when it comes to her health. 40 lbs. in 6 months sounds like an awful lot to me. And, when you make suggestions about her diet or her working out, you have to be more proactive about it. Set a date where she promises to go to the gym with you. Do something you both can do like raquetball or instead of playing basketball, do the treadmills or stairs with her at least for a while, so the two of you are doing it together. You can't just suggest her to do something without you at least pushing her a little bit. Some people need a little kick in the pants in order to get motivated. And, even if you don't eat all that healthy, if you want her to get healthy, then you should participate in the diet too.

If it's something that is or might become an issue, I think you have to confront the issue. You can be tactful about it, but if you really care about her, it's better to address it now than wait for it to get out of hand and it ultimately might be the cause of you two breaking up.

[Whisky Dog]

You can't be direct at all, you have to indirectly guide her to doing more stuff and eating better stuff by actually taking her by the hand and doing it. 99.8% or more of women do not understand language in the way we speak it. To us saying "I really love you but I'm just worried about a few extra pounds being unhealthy to you" sounds reasonable and logical, but once it gets filtered through her female brain it turns into "I hate you and how fat you've become so I'm going to fuck another woman". I don't know how it gets there, but it gets there. You can't communicate with language, you have to with action and body language. That's what women understand.

Here's the sad reality - with 99% of women you are going to have to lead. If you want something done you'll have to either do it or guide her in a way that it will happen. If you fuck up and say something that gets misinterpreted by her female brain to be anything like above she will nag you and completely go into bitch mode and harbor a grudge for months if not years. She will bring it up every so often even long after you forgot. You will have to deal with it ongoing with no end in sight.

Do not, ever, ever, ever try to communicate on a logical or rational level with a woman. Her brain will filter it to mean shit you had no intention of meaning and she will never forget it. You almost have to treat adult American women like little children - humor them, guide them, shelter them, and never argue with them. Let them think they're right or justified and just put it out of mind and move on. It's like if a 12 yr old gets all huffy believing they know everything - you don't argue you just nod and think "you have a lot to learn".

Last point - Dont ever let her get under your skin and get a negative emotion rise or outburst out of you. Once she see's she can get attention like this she will keep doing shit to piss you off to get the attention. Just rationally disect her actions and filter every attempt she makes to piss you off as cute. It's a fucking hard thing to master, but the closer you get the happier you will be as a man, guaranteed.

[JamStone]

Thank goodness those aren't the types of weak minded women I get involved with.

[JoeChalupa]

Maybe her weight just doesn't weigh as heavily on her mind as it does his.

[bus driver]

your skinny...she is oval and together you all make a 10! :toast

although an 11 is better :lol


show us the pics and we can judge

:ttiwwp:

[Stringer_Bell]

BRAHHHHH!

Every time I see this happen to RL people, I am dissapointed that YOU (the boyfriend) don't man the fuck up and say "Listen, woman, I notice you're concerned about your attractiveness and I ain't gonna lie to you, I love/like you the way you are...but I'm bringing you to the gym with me and we're gonna work on this. If you don't feel like the most beautiful woman in the world, what good is it to tell you that you're beautiful if you don't believe it for yourself? Whatever you need for YOU, baby, I need for ME. Let's do this thing, girl."

Do it and see what she says, and if she gets defense, go find someone else to turn your crank of whatever.

[Dro210]

Thank goodness those aren't the types of weak minded women I get involved with.

No shit.....

Forget all this beating around the bush bs... Honestly is the best policy my brotha, for you, and for her.

[FalleNxWiZarDx]

I really do appreciate all the comments everyone has posted... you guys are helping alot

I just text her to see if she wanted to go to the GYM with me just now, and she said she was sleepy and tired... (shes a legal assistant) :depressed

My reply was " ok babe, C U in a bit then "

When I get home, should I bring this up? or.... should I wait a little longer?


thanks :)

[Fat boy]

Thank goodness those aren't the types of weak minded women I get involved with.

Well, there sure are plenty of weak minded women in America.

[The Gemini Method]

Hmmm using "C" and "U" in the body of the text denotes someone of a younger age. However, I don't know if there is ever a correct way of telling someone they need to lost a little weight, nor should it really be your job to actually be the instigator for the life change. If you really like this girl and have a sense of humility, you can suggest, like you're doing, her to join you in physical activities like going to the gym, running, or bike riding. Don't make it seem like its a necessity for the relationship to work because that is entirely not a good way to approach things. This, amongst other things, needs to come from within her.

[ashbeeigh]

I really do appreciate all the comments everyone has posted... you guys are helping alot

I just text her to see if she wanted to go to the GYM with me just now, and she said she was sleepy and tired... (shes a legal assistant) :depressed

My reply was " ok babe, C U in a bit then "

When I get home, should I bring this up? or.... should I wait a little longer?


thanks :)

Not gonna lie. If I were a legal assistant the last thing I would want to do right after work is go to the gym (but I'm not your girlfriend either). Plan on this kind of stuff on a weekend or day off)...if you go to the gym on the weekend (day off) when it's not messing with her 'I'm lazy/I just got home from work schedule." Or say "Hey let's go to the gym and then grab something to eat (and then make in healthy)." You'll kill two birds with one stone

[Dro210]

It's a hard decision man, you know her best, you know how she'll react, or if you'll ever be able to convince her to get active or go to the gym without breaking her down first.... but if she's gained 40lbs in 6 months, if you don't think you can convince her to do those things the easy way, you've gotta do something man. If you care about her at least... that's so unhealthy. It should be more about her health than her attractiveness. Make sure she knows that, maybe it will ease the blow. Probably not tho, cause she doesn't seem to have much self-worth to begin with (no offense).

The way things are going is not good at all for either of you.... so forget all the, 'no easy way about it', 'no correct way to say it', 'don't ever tell a girl about her weight' comments... FUUUUUUCK all that... that's a disservice to both of you. Sometimes things aren't easy, but they still have to be done.

If she has any brains she'll realize you are trying to help her, and it's because you care... instead of getting mad and acting like a whiny bitch (age will have a lot to do with this I think)... you may have to go through that initially, but she should come around. If she doesn't, you're probably wasting your time anyway.




Also, walking around the mall, or going to the gym once/twice a week is not gonna get the job done.... DO NOT listen to these women if you want to actually make a real change. All those things will do is prevent it from getting worse.

[SpursFanFirst]

That's a tough one, Fallen. You're damned if you do, damned if you don't.

I think there were some really good ideas on here, though. AL hit the nail on the head.

Also, Chalupa's idea of having a Wii is a great idea for 2 reasons.
When you're overweight, going to a gym that's most likely a "meat market" is the last place you want to be. That might make her want to give up faster than anything.
And two, the Wii would be fun, you can do it together, and you don't have to leave the house. As Ash said, perhaps leaving the house isn't an appealing idea to her after working a long, hard day.

Now I want a Wii!

[DUNCANownsKOBE2]

I really do appreciate all the comments everyone has posted... you guys are helping alot

I just text her to see if she wanted to go to the GYM with me just now, and she said she was sleepy and tired... (shes a legal assistant) :depressed

My reply was " ok babe, C U in a bit then "

When I get home, should I bring this up? or.... should I wait a little longer?


thanks :)


Do something about it, you can't just let the situation fester like it has. You can't keep telling her an extra 40 Lbs is no big deal.

[Kamala]

I don't know your girlfriend's temperament. In my experience If you value your penis, testicles, and that general region of your body don't bring it up in a harsh way. If she's gained this much weight she is very aware of it and is not pleased about it.

Perhaps when eating you could model healthy eating habits and maybe start to enjoy that together in your relationship. Of course this is providing the weight gain is due to diet. If she has a thyroid issue she may not be able to control it. If this is a person you care for tread carefully and approach this in a way that shows you care about her well-being more than your physical attraction.

[Dro210]

I say the opposite... it's such a disservice to people to lie to them and try to make them think something is ok, or they're doing good when they're not. And it's even worse when it comes from somebody close (friend/family), cause they're more likely to believe you than anybody else in the world.

If you care about somebody, then tell them the truth... help them with it. Don't lie, and don't be a pussy about it, or it's only gonna get worse.

[Shelly]

I'm sure she's well aware that she's gained a few. I doubt she needs you to remind her of the fact. Believe me, if you do say something to her and the more you bug her about it, the more she'll be likely to resist.

But if she likes video games, I would suggest Wii active and do it with her so it's more like a game. My sister has it and says it's a great workout! Suggest going for walks, hikes, or whatever...something you both can do together without her feeling pressured into doing.

[ploto]

She knows that she has gained weight. She does not need you to tell her of that fact. She will do something about it when she decides to do it. Or not. Maybe she doesn't care. Maybe, she thinks you are in love with who she is not how she looks.

And yes, if you tell her, be prepared to learn just how small your penis is.

[baseline bum]

I think man will figure out dark energy, dark matter, and a unified field theory before he'll ever solve this problem.

[ploto]

Suggest going for walks, hikes, or whatever...something you both can do together without her feeling pressured into doing.

"Let's go to the gym" is not a good plan of action, especially if she is already uncomfortable with her weight gain.

[baseline bum]

Here is what you do. Leave a trail of twinkies from the bedroom to the street. Once she has picked up the scent and starts to devour them one by one start to follow her. Don't worry because she will be so into eating the twinkies that she won't even notice you. Once she is outside then quickly shut the door and lock it! Make sure you have a really heavy door or it is secured because more than likely she has grown a horn by now and will ram the door splitting it like paper.

ROFL :rollin

[PM5K]

I think you have to tell her, if she's smart she'll get your little hints and you'll still annoy her, don't beat around the bush with this shit. 40 pounds is wayyyy to much weight to gain unless she was anorexic to begin with.

[Dro210]

Like I said before, whatever you do... don't listen to the women.

[tlongII]

I'd dump her immediately. 40 lbs in 6 months??? You gotta be freakin kidding me! If you don't ditch this chick you'll soon find yourself living with the Goodyear Blimp.

[mavs>spurs2]

Also, the sexercise diet is a great one :tu

who wants to fuck a chick that's 40+ pounds overweight? I don't like your solution of basically just "deal with it." :td

[SpursWoman]

Good luck, whatever you decide to do. I really don't see that conversation ending well regardless, but then again I have no clue how sensitive she might be about it.

I'd recommend wearing a cup to the conversation, and to be prepared to fly solo for a while. :jack :lol

[holcs50]

dude, you're Norbit.

How is 6'2 190 skinny? I mean just wondering i'm the same height and bout 198, but when i was 190 i was bigger than most 6'2 guys. I guess it depends on how he's built and if he's just got a big belly and the rest is skinny or he actually is overall fit and works out...but 6'2 190 is a pretty damn healthy place to be at just by numbers.

And knowing myself I'd prob not tell her, just because I can be a pussy sometimes when it comes to shit like that.....but I think you SHOULD tell her before it becomes out of hand. Just all about the approach. All this get her active and eating better , but in a sneaky way is nonsense. Those are good ideas but a smart girl will pick up right away what your really trying to say.

[Pero]

Pay a stranger to walk up to her and tell her she's giant fat ass whale.

:lol

[JackLalanne]

Buying her a juicer would be a great gift that she will enjoy and you'll both reap the benefits.

[Jekka]

She knows that she has gained weight. She does not need you to tell her of that fact. She will do something about it when she decides to do it. Or not. Maybe she doesn't care. Maybe, she thinks you are in love with who she is not how she looks.

And yes, if you tell her, be prepared to learn just how small your penis is.
This was the first reaction of one of my non-forum friends who read this. Spot on.


who wants to fuck a chick that's 40+ pounds overweight? I don't like your solution of basically just "deal with it." :td
And I don't like pretty much everything that your chauvinist ass posts. I'm happy we're even.

[ShoogarBear]

Should I nudge her more?

Better do it now while you still can.

[MsMcGillyCutty]

If she has a mirror she knows what is going on.

[Leetonidas]

Get her addicted to coke. :tu

[Viva Las Espuelas]

I'd recommend wearing a cup to the conversation, and to be prepared to fly solo for a while. :jack :lol

:lol yeah. disneyland will be closed for a while if that bridge is crossed.

[mavs>spurs2]

And I don't like pretty much everything that your chauvinist ass posts. I'm happy we're even.

It's unfair to both parties in the relationship to continue on without addressing the problem. On one hand you have to ask yourself, why should the OP just keep his mouth shut and be with someone he isn't sexually attracted to? On the other hand, it's also unhealthy for the relationship and will only breed problems as time goes on and alienate the couple from eachother. It's not fair to the girl when it seems like the OP is growing more and more distant in their relationship and doesn't seem to love her as much as before because he simply isn't attracted to her and doesn't know how to say it. She will probably even grow insecure and ask herself why and think that it's her, when really it's him. It will just fester and cause insecurities for her and they will probably start fighting before long and the relationship will start to go downhill. The problem is one that should be addressed and not swept under the rug, I'm sorry if you feel that makes me some sort of chauvinist pig but it's the absolute truth and best for both parties.

[lefty]

Tell her she is fat

Are you still alive?

[CuckingFunt]

If I were you, I'd start by not being selfish. Rapid weight gain could be the result of physical and/or emotional issues, but you don't seem terribly concerned about that.

I don't know either of you personally, of course, so I don't know what her daily life is, but from your explanation it sounds like she works all day just to come home and veg out in front of the TV? Fun to do every now and then, I know from experience, but not particularly healthy or rewarding in the long term. Might not be a bad idea to tactfully and subtly urge her into new activities or hobbies that aren't necessarily joining you for a game of basketball. If weight hasn't ever been an issue for her previously, involvement in something engaging and rewarding would likely be enough to get her back on track in taking care of herself.

[tlongII]

Don't let this happen to you!
http://i46.photobucket.com/albums/f140/jmjosef/FatLadySkinnyGuy.jpg

[BackStabber]

Sometimes you just have to tell it like it is and then watch your back.

[David Bowie]

40+ pounds in 6 months is a very big weight gain. Has she gained a lot of weight before. Does she binge eat?

I think she may have a hormonal issue or is taking some kind of a pill that has hormones in it or prehaps induces more eating.

[ashbeeigh]

40+ pounds in 6 months is a very big weight gain. Has she gained a lot of weight before. Does she binge eat?

I think she may have a hormonal issue or is taking some kind of a pill that has hormones in it or prehaps induces more eating.

I said that a while ago and they ignored it. But, again...these are men we're talking about. :)

[Viva Las Espuelas]

I said that a while ago and they ignored it. But, again...these are men we're talking about. :)

Nah. I think it's just you.

[Richard Cranium]

Take her to Luby's and order her the Lu Ann platter.

[MANGINA]

Being told one is fat is bound to make one feel unattractive and become defensive so good luck.

[Wild Cobra]

I didn't read anything but the title. Here is my viewpoint. If her weight bothers you, it must be said. However, how things end up....

You know her better than probably everyone here. You must decide how to approach her on this. Just remember that women are hard to confront with some things.

[mrsmaalox]

I don't know OP, maybe it's time to just "move along". A big weight gain like that is not normal for most people, but for many women fluctuations (not this big, of course) are normal. If it's already happened, chances are it will happen again. Women gain weight with pregnancy and just age, and if you want to be with her long term you have to accept that this might happen. Of course it's possible she could make a realization for herself and make a major life change, who knows? What concerns me the most is your willingness to discuss the fact that she is sexually repulsive (she will see it this way) to you with strangers on a board, but also seem willing to lie to her that you are only concerned about her health. That it insincere and no one should be in a relationship like that. If the first concern you voiced was about her health it would be different. In a normal real love relationship, sexual attraction happens less and less in your eyes and more in your heart and mind. If you don't feel that is possible for you, why stick around, wasting both your time?

[FalleNxWiZarDx]

Iv decided to play the waiting game...

Based from the info iv gathered from weight gain, she might have some sort of disorder. I'm posting this via my blackberry in fear she might find this thread in my laptop....

I'm going to probe her a little, without hurting her feelings.

Any tips?

[holcs50]

If you under 200lbs and taller than 6', that is skinny.

Maybe for San Antonians/texans :rollin. I mean i guess if everyone avgs 5'8-5'10 240-250 lbs i guess it would be skinny

[Trainwreck2100]

change this song to the ringtone for when she calls you
jm4iFNqWbwI

[I. Hustle]

You obviously haven't taken any of my advice but here is some more just in case you want to really take care of this.
Weight gain isn't something that is easy to deal with the good thing though is that you are dealing with a woman. You see a female brain is only about half the size of a male brain. They are easy to manipulate and control once you have tamed them a bit. You are going to need a car battery and a pair of jumper cables. I am assuming that you are smart and have already chained up the refrigerator so that you alone have access. Connect the cables to the battery and connect the other ends to her two forks at the dinner table (again I am assuming that she shovels food in two forks at a time because of the rapid weight gain). Everytime she is allowed to sit down and eat she will pick up her forks and she will feel a shock. After about a month or so of this she will start to realize "Hey, if I eat I will get shocked". Now sometimes they figure out that it's the forks and will just pick up the food by hand. SO you will also need a spray bottle filled with lemon juice. Once she grabs a piece of her food spray the lemon juice in her face.
I know, women are a lot of hassle and almost seem like too much trouble but you have to remember that they have a vagina. So take your time and work with her. Hopefully she hasn't grown a horn yet due to her size but if she has then just grab the horn and direct her to your penis. This will give her the satisfaction of having something in her mouth as well as working off some of her neck fat.

[SpursStalker]

You really shouldn't listen to any of the advice in this thread ...

:lol

[spurster]

If you under 200lbs and taller than 6', that is skinny.

6' 2" and 190 lbs. is between 24 and 25 BMI, and 25 is the BMI overweight threshold. Yes, I know BMI has a lot of problems, but 24 is not skinny.

[Big P]

Any updates? :wakeup

[lefty]

I know !!!


You can email her this link: http://www.spurstalk.com/forums/showthread.php?t=113553

But be careful, she might stumble across the thread you have started about her

[tlongII]

Iv decided to play the waiting game...

Based from the info iv gathered from weight gain, she might have some sort of disorder. I'm posting this via my blackberry in fear she might find this thread in my laptop....

I'm going to probe her a little, without hurting her feelings.

Any tips?

Disorder??? LMAO! She eats like a pig and doesn't exercise! I didn't realize being a fat lazy slob was a disorder?

[DisgruntledLionFan#54,927]

Tell her? Of course not.

Continuing to lie to her always works in the long run.

Always.

[I. Hustle]

-You could rig your living room floor to be one huge treadmill. Just hook up the light switch as a start switch and when she goes to turn on the light the treadmill will start.

- put some healthy snacks in a tire and as she flips it over to play with it the snacks will fall out.

- Grease up a chicken and have her try to catch it. I can all but guarantee that after a few months of this she will eat lightnin' and crap thundah. Just be careful she doesn't eat it once she catches it.

- Put a bucket of wings at the top of a hill. Make sure there are fruits and veggies inside though and not actual wings. Once she sees what they are she won't touch them. Put one on the bottom once she reaches the top and just keep repeating. She will be so full of hope that at least once there will be wings that she will keep going for them.

- Put a tray of cupcakes in the middle of a pool and have her swim to it. Make sure you tie a rope to the tray and floatie though so that you can pull it as she gets closer.

[Oh, Gee!!]

tell her very bluntly--you shouldn't hide your feeling if you love her.

[clambake]

tell her to lose weight or you'll go back to your wife.

[JamStone]

Tell her? Of course not.

Continuing to lie to her always works in the long run.

Always.

Ok, say your girlfriend is extremely gorgeous. And, while that's not the only reason you're with her, it's undoubtedly a reason why you're so attracted to her. Say she's on the level of a Beyonce. Now, she starts gaining weight for whatever reason, and gets to the level of of Monique. Continuing to lie to her and telling her that you still find her attractive is going to work in the long run? I'm sorry, but if I started with Beyonce, no way in hell would I want to end up with Monique. And, having Monique would not work out in the long run for me. Looks aren't everything, but damn, come on.

[DisgruntledLionFan#54,927]

Jam, I wasn't being serious.

I'd have pulled the rip cord and ejected a few months ago.

[Blake]

-You could rig your living room floor to be one huge treadmill. Just hook up the light switch as a start switch and when she goes to turn on the light the treadmill will start.

- put some healthy snacks in a tire and as she flips it over to play with it the snacks will fall out.

- Grease up a chicken and have her try to catch it. I can all but guarantee that after a few months of this she will eat lightnin' and crap thundah. Just be careful she doesn't eat it once she catches it.

- Put a bucket of wings at the top of a hill. Make sure there are fruits and veggies inside though and not actual wings. Once she sees what they are she won't touch them. Put one on the bottom once she reaches the top and just keep repeating. She will be so full of hope that at least once there will be wings that she will keep going for them.

- Put a tray of cupcakes in the middle of a pool and have her swim to it. Make sure you tie a rope to the tray and floatie though so that you can pull it as she gets closer.

- dangle some tasty treats on a string as you circle around her tank at sea world

[ShoogarBear]

Jam, I wasn't being serious.

I'd have pulled the rip cord and ejected a few months ago.

And we all remember what you're willing to put up with.

[circ]

if you're the type that can lose weight easily, maybe you can gradually gain some weight yourself. Then, ask her if you're getting fat and that you're concerned about your own health. just hope she sees the light at that point. if she's good at the fps on xbox make up some bs and challenge her at paintball, then other games she plays but not in the virtual world... basketball, tag/tackle football yadda yadda.

[DisgruntledLionFan#54,927]

And we all remember what you're willing to put up with.

Well, her weight gain was definitely less than 40 pounds.

I wonder if he's a full blown she now.