I hope you are happy, Mr Luva

[Pepe'sTowing]

Halberto... what should I do? I got this married Mexican chic whose husband drives a tow truck, and his shifts vary, but on Sunday night he's out late working graveyard. This is always the window of opportunity for me to tax that ass. Should I...



a. Not go get the pussy just to play with you clowns



b. Respect their marriage and leave her alone



c. Keep the pussy on tap until the well runs dry



You are a soulless bastard, Mr. Luva.

Im a hardworking and God-fearing man that had a rough life. I grew up in Juarez Mexico in a poor family. Sometimes we would starve and never knew where the next taco was gonna come from. I had to see many of mi amigos, how do you say, fall victim to the cartels. They thought they would get rich, but it never happen and they only found the grave and a an eternity in Hell. I never gave into temptation and always prayed to God for strength and guidance.

I come here in summer 2000 with 10 pesos to my name. I start small. Washing a gabacho's tow truck for 1.00 at a time. after months of washing his truck and cleaning his office, he start to trust me enough to where he show me how the business work. he then, in an act of kindness that I thank God for to this day, pay for me to go to the community college night school in Riverside to learn business.

I save and save and save for 8 years before I had enough to put a down payment on my truck and pay to advertise my towing company. I also have enough money to send for Gina, mi amor, and get her out of Ciudad Juarez.

I start to live what you Gringos call the American Dream. I undercut the gabachos and gueros and offer a tow at 3 times less the price. Mexicanos are simple people and we don't need all the plasma tv, xbox, mercedes benz, diamond shoes, ermine furs, and gold teeth bullshit that you gabachos desire. Give us a roof, a taco, and a Bud light and we are happy.

Now, today, with your confession and Gina telling me the truth about how she love you and want a divorce, I'm close to losing everything I worked for. You can never understand what I'm about to lose.

You are no "Santo de Pakistani" as my Gina calls you. You are a diablo, Mr Luva.

And you will burn in hell like one, as God as my witness, you will burn.

[Goran Dragic]

:lmao

[himat]

:lol:lol:lol:lol:lol

[BoricuaCJA]

Ha HA!

[BadOdor]

:rollin

[Pepe'sTowing]

This is no laughing manner. Mr Luva has taken mi corazon por vida away from me. My beautiful Gina...

http://www.raqui.com/pictures_appearances/BehindTheFat-Documentary/DocumentaryBehindTheFat%20001.jpg

[Sisk]

:lmao

[usdane]

:lol:lmao

[scanry]

This has got to be the same dude that trolled Luva & Koolaid to death a month ago. :lol








Hi mono!!:toast

[ulosturedge]

Luva u home wrecker :depressed

[rayray2k8]

Luva likes them big. :lol

[Spursfan092120]

wow...that was just amazing.

[HarlemHeat37]

:lol Luva viewing the thread, thinking hard, trying to come up with a clever retort..

[scanry]

Not bad luva, but you could've done better!!!

[LnGrrrR]

:lol

[TheLakaluvaLibrary]

You know, the Camaro is an amazing car. My personal favorite is the 67... she's mother fucker. I got my first one in 96. A fucking redneck sold me what I thought was a deal. The tranny in that bitch gave out in less than a year. I bet you he don't know who stole the sounds in that CHEVY K-5 of his till this day. Never buy a sports car from a young redneck! That car never did run right. Eventually, Chevy announced they weren't making any more Camaro's after 2002... liars, so what I do, go out and get me one clean off the fucking lot. Limited Edition, six speed, 5.7L, with t-tops, and leather interior. I went out and slapped some dubs on that bitch the same day I drove it off the lot. This was going to be my keeper, I'd keep it for a classic, and show up at the car shows 20 years later.

I still got that car today, only 65k miles on her, rarely drive her, but when I do, I swear there is always some fucking redneck in a Mustang wanting to race. I race em, but I always cheat, every single fucking time. Did you know Henry Ford was a racist? Remember that the next time you feel stupid and go out and tow you one of those racist Mustangs. I always get people asking me "how fast is she?" I just rev my engine and keep pushing. But your old lady ask me those exact words a few months back one Sunday night. I'm over at the Mai Tai bar in Long Beach hoping to catch me a straggler... you know, a drunk bitch that needs a ride home, but we ain't going home.:lol

Gina texts me, "my old man is working late tonight, how fast can you get here, he'll be home in an hour and thirty?" I'm thinking, shit, it takes an hour just to get to Riverside from Long Beach, and that 91 HWY is a bitch, even on Sunday nights. Before I can tell her not tonight, she text'd me a picture of one of the wetest pussies you ever laid your eyes on. I jump on that 405 to the 605 to the 91 and it's on, I'm pushing a 100mph all the way. Then all of a sudden some fucking gook cuts me off in one of those souped up Asian cars. You know, the ones with those loud fucking mufflers. I got on his fucking ass with my high beams doing a hundred. That little short mother fucker didn't let up because before you know it I'm doing 140 mph, on a fucked up free way!

That fucking gook finally pumped his brakes and got off the freeway, but not before I tossed a hand full of nickles, dimes, and pennies out my t-tops at his windshield, but I'm damn there doing a 150 mph at the time. That fucking engine was screaming, then I notice I'm only in 5th gear, and I got six. I shifted that bitch into to sixth gear for the first time since I owend her, and I swear this fucking Camaro felt like the Mothership. I've never felt that kind of power in my life!!! I fucking passed you guys exit up by accident and I didn't have time to waste. Then I look at the clock and notice that I've reached my destination in thirty fucking minutes... that's 30 fucking minutes, son. You could have called me Sancho The Bandit that night. From Long Beach to Riverside in 30 fucking minutes. That left me more than 45 minutes to fuck your old lady. Guess who put in work that night.:toast

The real trooper was my Camaro. That bitch hauled fucking ass that night. Don't you ever underestimate a Camaro, son. Every time you tow one, you salute her.

Your most ambitious work yet. It will indeed make a very worthy addition. The only question is where to file it?

813.436 (American Literature/Fiction/Short Stories) would seem the most obvious choice, but I don't think the most obvious choice is necessarily the best here. Your latest work is less fiction and more sociological examination.

So yes, I think 177.671 (Ethics of social relations/Adultary-Consequences of/Destroying the marriage of a beaner, ruining his towing company, and having him condemn you to an eternity in Hell) is the proper place for this one.

It will make an effective cauntionary tale for our patrons.

Thank you for yet another contribution.

Regards,

TheLakaluvaLibrary

[picc84]

lakaluva library :lmao

[Malice]

Fucking Lakaluva library? Epic posts man lol. But, please stop, Im at work man! LMAO

[badfish22]

Before this, I was thinking Pepe'sTowing was Culburn. But now Im not sure.

[The Gemini Method]

Wait, you were at Mai Tai's and you went to chase pussy in Riverside? Must've been a slow night ath the Tai's, because there is some bomb ass strange up in that joint. Have you been to Kavika's or whatever the hell that is called?

[lakaluva's mom]

Mai Tai is always loaded, but Gina sucks a mean cock, son.:toast I went with the for sure thing that night. Kavika's is cool, very nice. You get more of a Latin flavor up in there, which is alright with me, but for some reason Mai Tai has become "The Pick-Up Spot." Its amazing what they've done to LB these last 10 years. They doing the same thing downtown LA, it's getting nice down there. All-star will be off the fucking hook this year.

Look at luva, pretending he knows what he's talking about. 7,000 posts per year, makes it seem like he doesn't have time for women

[The Gemini Method]

Mai Tai is always loaded, but Gina sucks a mean cock, son.:toast I went with the for sure thing that night. Kavika's is cool, very nice. You get more of a Latin flavor up in there, which is alright with me, but for some reason Mai Tai has become "The Pick-Up Spot." Its amazing what they've done to LB these last 10 years. They doing the same thing downtown LA, it's getting nice down there. All-star will be off the fucking hook this year.

Yeah, It sure is alot better than LBC of the past. I have had a great time with Mai Tai's. I wasn't allowed in to Kavika's for wearing shorts last weekend. Sevilla's is also a crackin' spot for that Latina lovin...

[SomeCallMeTim]

150 MPH on the 91 fwy? Sure, I believe that.

I also believe that the US economy is in full recovery mode and we'll likely see home prices making 40% annual gains again these next several years.

Good times!

[Pepe'sTowing]

Mai Tai is always loaded, but Gina sucks a mean cock, son.:toast I went with the for sure thing that night. Kavika's is cool, very nice. You get more of a Latin flavor up in there, which is alright with me, but for some reason Mai Tai has become "The Pick-Up Spot." Its amazing what they've done to LB these last 10 years. They doing the same thing downtown LA, it's getting nice down there. All-star will be off the fucking hook this year.

I shoulda known. The signs were there but I didnt want to admit the truth, la verdad, to myself.

At the community college they teach us about Dr Freud and his theories. Gina's tacos always used to be big, healthy, and full of carne asada, guacomole, frijitos, arroz, you name it, dumped in to the biggest fried flour tortilla there was.

Then suddenly she start making tacos with corn tortillas, muy pequeno, very small. I tole her why you using these? I tow all day and I need a big taco to fill me up and give me energy for more towing at the night shift. She try to say she want to lose weight. At that time I just thought the gabacho culture and living in Southern CA with all the women trying to look like actors had finally got to her and make her feel bad about her looks.

But now I realize it was not that. It was, how do you say, Freudian. The small tacos were a symbolic manisfestation of her sexual desires. You see despite, how do you say, stereotype, Mexicanos are are well endowed peoples, and everytime me and Gina would make love, hacer el amor, she complain I was too big and it hurt her.

I see this show on the Spike TV the other day call Manswers. They talk about the races with the smallest pepitos and say India is number 1. At the community college, I learn geography and know that Pakistan next to India, so they share many ancestors.

Now with Mr Luva coming along, the man who my Gina call, "Santo de Pakistani" I understand why the tacos went from mucho grande to muy, muy pequeno.

[TheLakaluvaLibrary]

I shoulda known. The signs were there but I didnt want to admit the truth, la verdad, to myself.

At the community college they teach us about Dr Freud and his theories. Gina's tacos always used to be big, healthy, and full of carne asada, guacomole, frijitos, arroz, you name it, dumped in to the biggest fried flour tortilla there was.

Then suddenly she start making tacos with corn tortillas, muy pequeno, very small. I tole her why you using these? I tow all day and I need a big taco to fill me up and give me energy for more towing at the night shift. She try to say she want to lose weight. At that time I just thought the gabacho culture and living in Southern CA with all the women trying to look like actors had finally got to her and make her feel bad about her looks.

But now I realize it was not that. It was, how do you say, Freudian. The small tacos were a symbolic manisfestation of her sexual desires. You see despite, how do you say, stereotype, Mexicanos are are well endowed peoples, and everytime me and Gina would make love, hacer el amor, she complain I was too big and it hurt her.

I see this show on the Spike TV the other day call Manswers. They talk about the races with the smallest pepitos and say India is number 1. At the community college, I learn geography and know that Pakistan next to India, so they share many ancestors.

Now with Mr Luva coming along, the man who my Gina call, "Santo de Pakistani" I understand why the tacos went from mucho grande to muy, muy pequeno.


Even though Lakaluva did not write this, it will definitely be added to our collection since it gives us more of an idea about the overall (or lacktherof, snicker, snicker) being and character of Lakaluva.

No other place to file this, really. 611.628 (Medical Sciences/Human Anatomy/Small penises).

Thank you for contribution.

Sincerely,

The Lakaluva Library.

[LnGrrrR]

I'm enjoying this Luva Library troll :lol

[picc84]

I shoulda known. The signs were there but I didnt want to admit the truth, la verdad, to myself.

At the community college they teach us about Dr Freud and his theories. Gina's tacos always used to be big, healthy, and full of carne asada, guacomole, frijitos, arroz, you name it, dumped in to the biggest fried flour tortilla there was.

Then suddenly she start making tacos with corn tortillas, muy pequeno, very small. I tole her why you using these? I tow all day and I need a big taco to fill me up and give me energy for more towing at the night shift. She try to say she want to lose weight. At that time I just thought the gabacho culture and living in Southern CA with all the women trying to look like actors had finally got to her and make her feel bad about her looks.

But now I realize it was not that. It was, how do you say, Freudian. The small tacos were a symbolic manisfestation of her sexual desires. You see despite, how do you say, stereotype, Mexicanos are are well endowed peoples, and everytime me and Gina would make love, hacer el amor, she complain I was too big and it hurt her.

I see this show on the Spike TV the other day call Manswers. They talk about the races with the smallest pepitos and say India is number 1. At the community college, I learn geography and know that Pakistan next to India, so they share many ancestors.

Now with Mr Luva coming along, the man who my Gina call, "Santo de Pakistani" I understand why the tacos went from mucho grande to muy, muy pequeno.

i cant take much more of this :rollin

[MavDynasty]

I'm enjoying this Luva Library troll :lol

:tu

[Pepe'sTowing]

No Mijo, you see in my culture, we don't eat those fucking burro tacos. That's the problem with you Messicans, you eat too much. Besides, I never really had much time to enjoy a big meal, and fuck Gina. She always made sure that I was leaving out the side door just as you were coming in the front door. I swear, those fucking muts of yours almost got poisoned plenty of nights for making all that gotdamn racket.

You know, Gina told me you studied a few classes at the JC. They teach you the difference between Indies and Pakis? No, not Religion jackass, it's Karma Sutra. Before I came to the States, I used to import exotic spices from across the Indian border in to Pakistan, a little town called Cease Fire, just north of Dras. They had this little whore house right there at the border. I tell ya, you could go in there with 10 Rupees and fuck all night, son. There was this one whore I took a liking to... Abhay, means fearless, and fearless she was.

She told me there was 64 Karma Sutra positions to conquer a mans love. I said, well how many are there to conquer a woman's love? She says...ONE! I'll tell you something Mijo, that Indian blew my mind 69 times that night, but there was one particular move she taught me that I used on your old lady that changed her life forever, the Full Nelson Indian Squat...I substitute Paki for Indian, but it's all the same. After putting this move on Gina, I discovered something more valuable than a Messican for hire with a valid Green Card. "It ain't the size of your taco, it's the technique in which you serve it.":toast

http://i857.photobucket.com/albums/ab138/lakaluva58/304.gif

You are a devil and a liar, Mr Luva.

I know you sleep with my Gina. She came clean to me. But there no way you do Indian Full Nelson on her. My Gina is too big and healthy for such a disgusting position that would surely make all the angels in heaven weep and give Jesus himself the cancer. If you tried that with her, you legs would break off at your knees, Mr Luva. It would be like me trying to tow a semi truck with flat tires.

I make her tell me what you two do. She tell me that to keep you from getting confused and putting your pepito in one of her, how do you say, rolls, that you cover her in baby powder and try to find the wet spot.

I never got confused like you, Mr Luva. I love my Gina, la senora toda, the whole woman. I know every part of her beautiful body. While all you care about is the "wet spot."

That's the difference between a good man like me and a diablo like you, Mr Luva.

[ezau]

LMAO Santo de Pakistani. Fuck, I can't stop laughing huawahahahahaha

[ezau]

I shoulda known. The signs were there but I didnt want to admit the truth, la verdad, to myself.

At the community college they teach us about Dr Freud and his theories. Gina's tacos always used to be big, healthy, and full of carne asada, guacomole, frijitos, arroz, you name it, dumped in to the biggest fried flour tortilla there was.

Then suddenly she start making tacos with corn tortillas, muy pequeno, very small. I tole her why you using these? I tow all day and I need a big taco to fill me up and give me energy for more towing at the night shift. She try to say she want to lose weight. At that time I just thought the gabacho culture and living in Southern CA with all the women trying to look like actors had finally got to her and make her feel bad about her looks.

But now I realize it was not that. It was, how do you say, Freudian. The small tacos were a symbolic manisfestation of her sexual desires. You see despite, how do you say, stereotype, Mexicanos are are well endowed peoples, and everytime me and Gina would make love, hacer el amor, she complain I was too big and it hurt her.

I see this show on the Spike TV the other day call Manswers. They talk about the races with the smallest pepitos and say India is number 1. At the community college, I learn geography and know that Pakistan next to India, so they share many ancestors.

Now with Mr Luva coming along, the man who my Gina call, "Santo de Pakistani" I understand why the tacos went from mucho grande to muy, muy pequeno.

:lmao:lmao:lmao

[z0sa]

:lmao

[fo'shizzle]

LOL at this thread

[The Gemini Method]

I like the part where Pepe goes from Tow-truck operator to quoting Freudian terms...lol...

[Pepe'sTowing]

I like the part where Pepe goes from Tow-truck operator to quoting Freudian terms...lol...

I pay attention to what they teach at the college.

To live peacefully among the gabachos, you got to learn and understand their customs.

We don't need all that stuff in Mexico. We are a simple people. Have no use for Freudian theories, quantum physics, string theory, existentialism, and all that. We put our lives in the hands of God almighty and say a novena to a Santo should we need guidance. We don't see the purpose in laying down in some gabacho's office and giving him mucho dinero just to sit there and listen to our problems. Why do that when you can go to Priest and do the same for free?

[The Gemini Method]

I pay attention to what they teach at the college.

To live peacefully among the gabachos, you got to learn and understand their customs.

We don't need all that stuff in Mexico. We are a simple people. Have no use for Freudian theories, quantum physics, string theory, existentialism, and all that. We put our lives in the hands of God almighty and say a novena to a Santo should we need guidance. We don't see the purpose in laying down in some gabacho's office and giving him mucho dinero just to sit there and listen to our problems. Why do that when you can go to Priest and do the same for free?

This is truth. You are wise beyond your car towing ways, Pepe. So what's next for the spurned husband?

[Pepe'sTowing]

This is truth. You are wise beyond your car towing ways, Pepe. So what's next for the spurned husband?

I will let God sort out all this infidelity, Full Nelson Indian Squat, behavior. I have no place to judge my Gina and this Pakistani. They have to atone to Him for their sins, and only He can grant them forgiveness.

Me and Gina will stay married. I do not turn away from my vows to her and to God. And I will not let her break hers. She can continue her sinful business with Mr Luva and I will continue to work hard and give people a tow at a good price.

In the end, only God can decide our places in eternity. But I know that when we stand before Him, that I have been the better and bigger man than the so called "Santo de Pakistani."

[The Gemini Method]

I would say go and get yourself a hot Pakistani woman to ply your own sort of revenge, but I'm not sure if there are any in the world. But, I say you get yourself some nice little latina on the side to show that "Santo de Pakistan."

[Pepe'sTowing]

I would say go and get yourself a hot Pakistani woman to ply your own sort of revenge, but I'm not sure if there are any in the world. But, I say you get yourself some nice little latina on the side to show that "Santo de Pakistan."

I understand your thinking, but I am a God fearing man and to break my vows would be a sin.

By staying, how do you say, righteous, I show Gina and Mr Luva that my will cannot be broken. The pleasures of the flesh and the satisfaction of revenge are short lived compared to an eternity in His grace.