Funerals

[benefactor]

I'm pretty sure I don't want one tbh. I want to be cremated too. It's a helluva lot cheaper. If my family really wanted to do something I'd want them to just have a get together with some friends and have some food and just visit with each other.

The thing I hate the most about funerals is people talking about the dead person. "He looks so good." No, he doesn't. He looks dead with some makeup on. I don't really care to have a bunch of people staring at my dead, made up body.

[leemajors]

Wake.

[SA210]

I'm not surprised to see Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson at Whitney's funeral. Al Sharpton seriously gets on my nerves.

[TDMVPDPOY]

how about ppl who dont plan for their funeral, and want the best etc = money

fkn if you cant afford it, or no one willing to gift money to make one....go the cremation way or something that fits ur budget....

[DMC]

I want to be put on a wooden raft and set afloat on the sea, then by an archer from afar, set ablaze like a barn up ol' Sasquatch.

After I die, of course.

[resistanze]

I could give a fuck what they do with my corpse after I'm dead. Entomb me in solid gold or throw me in a pool of piranhas - WGAF.

[DeadlyDynasty]

Have you ever seen a pamphlet with funeral/casket options? It goes from like Mahogany all the way down to cardboard box...i shit you not.

[TDMVPDPOY]

feed to stray dogs?

thats what they do with champion horses lol

[Wild Cobra Kai]

I'm pretty sure I don't want one tbh. I want to be cremated too. It's a helluva lot cheaper. If my family really wanted to do something I'd want them to just have a get together with some friends and have some food and just visit with each other.

The thing I hate the most about funerals is people talking about the dead person. "He looks so good." No, he doesn't. He looks dead with some makeup on. I don't really care to have a bunch of people staring at my dead, made up body.

tbh, at that point, you won't even care.

Funerals aren't for the dead, they're for the living, so that they can accept the death and move on.

[Technique]

I went to the funeral of Yelena, the girl that was murdered by Max Gelman. She was my high school classmate. Pretty depressing.

[DeadlyDynasty]

I went to the funeral of Yelena, the girl that was murdered by Max Gelman. She was my high school classmate. Pretty depressing.

Yeah those funerals can be real downers.

[DesignatedT]

Get together at a bar for my death. Everyone gets wasted. Send me out right.

[Wild Cobra]

I'm not surprised to see Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson at Whitney's funeral. Al Sharpton seriously gets on my nerves.
I wish they weren't invited. Makes me lose a bit of respect for the family.

[Wild Cobra Kai]

I wish they weren't invited. Makes me lose a bit of respect for the family.

Selfish much? They obviously wanted them there. Who gives a shit what you want?

[FuzzyLumpkins]

I wish they weren't invited. Makes me lose a bit of respect for the family.

They are black, therefor you had no respect for them to begin with or is it that you do not trust black doctors but respect them anyway?

[CubanSucks]

Get together at a bar for my death. Everyone gets wasted. Send me out right.

Snatch style with the funeral for Mickey's mum

M4HZjMMJ9WE

[Al Sharpton]

I'm not surprised to see Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson at Whitney's funeral. Al Sharpton seriously gets on my nerves.

If I showed up at your funeral I'd be the only one so STFU.

[marini martini]

Get together at a bar for my death. Everyone gets wasted. Send me out right.

You buying???:toast

[Eddie Murphy]

You buying???:toast

no he ain't buyin muthafuckra, he dead

[benefactor]

tbh, at that point, you won't even care.

Funerals aren't for the dead, they're for the living, so that they can accept the death and move on.
So I shouldn't have any say on how MY death is celebrated? Bullshit.

If you can't move on without some big ceremony to help you then you have bigger issues you should be dealing with. I don't mind them doing something in my honor, I just don't want the big church funeral with open casket and all the rest of the traditional crap. Get together, eat, drink and share some stories about me. That's all I'd want at the most.

[Saved By Zero]

So I shouldn't have any say on how MY death is celebrated? Bullshit.

If you can't move on without some big ceremony to help you then you have bigger issues you should be dealing with. I don't mind them doing something in my honor, I just don't want the big church funeral with open casket and all the rest of the traditional crap. Get together, eat, drink and share some stories about me. That's all I'd want at the most.

Do your Will and you wont have to worry about it. Not that it matters since you'll be dead.

[Giuseppe]

"Death is just around the corner. If only it would stay there."

[ElMuerto]

So many people are just dying for a funeral.

[Giuseppe]

U.S. President Thomas Jefferson died on July 4, 1826, the 50th anniversary of the ratifcation of the Declaration of Independence. He died five hours before John Adams. Jefferson's last words were:

"Is it the fourth?"

[mrsmaalox]

I really couldn't care less what happens to me after I'm dead, I've told my husband and kids that they can cremate or donate or dispose of me as they see fit; I believe the after death rituals are for the comfort of the living and I have no expectations as to how they choose to celebrate me----if they choose to do it in their minds only it's fine with me.

But I think that whatever it is you have in mind for your disposition, you MUST make sure that EVERYONE who has an opinion be made aware of your wishes. There can be a BIG generational and cultural disconnect within a family that can be made really ugly by things like funerals. My husband's adult nephew passed away 11 years ago from a brain tumor. He gave his wife instructions on what he wanted, bury him next to his dad in a plain box, no services, rent their favorite pub for the evening, invite anyone he ever knew and serve all his favorite food (including fast food) and tap a couple of his favorite kegs. The relationship between his wife and mother had always been "polite" at best, but both were at his bedside when he passed. Mom was pretty shocked a short while later when wife started planning the "party'. All hell broke loose with accusations of "you must be glad he's gone" and "he didn't tell you his plans because you are such a controlling bitch", etc. Lots of feelings were hurt but my sympathy is for the 2 little kids who have no contact with any of their paternal family since that day. Very sad situation that could have been avoided if only he had made his wishes known to all, in advance.

[WeNeedLength]

So many people are just dying for a funeral.

:td

[baseline bum]

I want the Folgers can + ocean + windy day option.

[Viva Las Espuelas]

I want to put fun back in funerals.

[SA210]

If I showed up at your funeral I'd be the only one so STFU.

And I'd wake up from my death to slap you with your stupid hair, then bury it in your under tit area, and tape your man boob over it!

[The Reckoning]

either shoot my body off into space to be worked on by aliens

or cremate me and send me off into the ocean as fish food.

depends how much $ i can fish out of hemann's pockets.

[Dex]

I want the Folgers can + ocean + windy day option.

:tu

http://endlesspicdump.com/original/spraying%20ashes.gif (http://endlesspicdump.com/spraying-ashes.html)

[Dex]

Just because I have (unfortunately) had some recent experience with this subject....

My father passed away less than a month ago. He was terminally ill with cancer, and specifically requested to be cremated. He also made it known that he didn't want a whole lot of doom and gloom about his death; he didn't want people people grieving and mourning over him. He was a very humble man.

We had a nice service for him at a funeral home, which mostly consisted of a pastor speaking (my Dad wasn't greatly religious, but he was a Christian man), a slideshow of pictures that I put together, a few speakers (one of his colleagues, my brother, and myself), and after a few more words from the pastor, it ended with one of his favorite songs. My Dad always wore Hawaiian shirts, so that's what we all wore in remembrance of him instead of going the whole all black route. It was short, bittersweet, and comforting for all in attendance. After the service, we all went back to my parents house and had one last party in his honor...a celebration of his life, instead of a mourning of his death, as he would've wanted.

Personally, I was cursed with the knowledge that my father would be dying for the past year and a half. In my mind, the one thing that kept haunting me was thinking of him, all made up and laying in a casket. I had to force myself not to think about it. I just couldn't bare to see him like that. I was unaware that he had requested cremation, but I am grateful that I never had to face that moment. That day, and its memory, was much easier to get through when all I had to see were pictures of my dad smiling and laughing, how I remember him and prefer to always remember him. Plus I was able to get a keepsake with his ashes, which I can take with me forever, instead of having some grave somewhere that I would always feel the need to come and visit and care for. For that reason alone, I will go the same route. I don't want my loved ones, my kids, etc...to one day have to sit and stare upon my corpse.

On another note, being cremated also saved my mother a lot of money. His entire service was about $3500, which was less than my grandmother's casket cost alone. If you do the standard burial, after you pay for the casket, the lot, the burial, the service...you are easily looking at over 10 grand just to put you in the ground. Not a burden I would want to leave on my family, and even if you've got life insurance to cover it, I'm sure that money could be applied to much better means. In the eternal words of Walter, "just because we're bereaved doesn't make us saps!"

[SA210]

Just because I have (unfortunately) had some recent experience with this subject....

My father passed away less than a month ago. He was terminally ill with cancer, and specifically requested to be cremated. He also made it known that he didn't want a whole lot of doom and gloom about his death; he didn't want people people grieving and mourning over him. He was a very humble man.

We had a nice service for him at a funeral home, which mostly consisted of a pastor speaking (my Dad wasn't greatly religious, but he was a Christian man), a slideshow of pictures that I put together, a few speakers (one of his colleagues, my brother, and myself), and after a few more words from the pastor, it ended with one of his favorite songs. My Dad always wore Hawaiian shirts, so that's what we all wore in remembrance of him instead of going the whole all black route. It was short, bittersweet, and comforting for all in attendance. After the service, we all went back to my parents house and had one last party in his honor...a celebration of his life, instead of a mourning of his death, as he would've wanted.

Personally, I was cursed the knowledge that my father would be dying for the past year and a half. In my mind, the one thing that kept haunting me was thinking of him, all made up and laying in a casket. I had to force myself not to think about it. I just couldn't bare to see him like that. I was unaware that he had requested cremation, but I am grateful that I never had to face that moment. That day, and its memory, was much easier to get through when all I had to see were pictures of my dad smiling and laughing, how I remember him and prefer to always remember him. Plus I was able to get a keepsake with his ashes, which I can take with me forever, instead of having some grave somewhere that I would always feel the need to come and visit and care for. For that and that alone, I will go the same route. I don't want my loved ones, my kids, etc...to one day have to sit and stare upon my corpse.

On another note, being cremated also saved my mother a lot of money. His entire service was about $3500, which was less than my grandmother's casket cost alone. If you do the standard burial, after you pay for the casket, the lot, the burial, the service...you are easily looking at over 10 grand just to put you in the ground. Not a burden I would want to leave on my family, and even if you've got life insurance to cover it, I'm sure that money could be applied to much better means. In the eternal words of Walter, "just because we're bereaved doesn't make us saps!"

Sorry about your father. Sounds like a wonderful service you had for him.

[ChumpDumper]

I'm not surprised to see Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson at Whitney's funeral. Al Sharpton seriously gets on my nerves.


I wish they weren't invited. Makes me lose a bit of respect for the family.I bet there were black surgeons there too!

[SA210]

I bet there were black surgeons there too!

What does black have to do with it?

[Giuseppe]

Last words:::

- "Let me die in my old uniform. God forgive me for ever having put on another."

- Benedict Arnold

------

- "I must go in, the fog is rising."

- Emily Dickinson

------

- "Thomas Jefferson still survives."

- John Adams - U.S. President

[redzero]

Shut the fuck up, Dale.

[ploto]

Just because I have (unfortunately) had some recent experience with this subject....

I am very sorry for your loss and am glad that you were able to fulfill your father's wishes.

Do you mind my asking how you might have felt had his request been the opposite? What if the person wants a large church service and a big funeral procession?

In big Catholic family tradition, we sort of have both. There is always a church service with a vigil, the Mass, and the graveside service... But then there is always afterward a large gathering that turns into laughter and celebration.

[The Reckoning]

Shut the fuck up, Dale.


lame trolling on this forum is lame

[Dude]

I'm gonna be cremated.

[JudynTX]

In big Catholic family tradition, we sort of have both. There is always a church service with a vigil, the Mass, and the graveside service... But then there is always afterward a large gathering that turns into laughter and celebration.

Yep, that's how we do it. Burying my mother was the hardest thing to do, I didn't think I would ever get through it. But it's true what they say, family and friends get you through the rough moments in your life. That, and time.

On a totally different related note, aren't people suppose to bring US food when someone passes away? It's a good thing we catered, otherwise we wouldn't have eaten. :lol

[Viva Las Espuelas]

Yep, that's how we do it. Burying my mother was the hardest thing to do, I didn't think I would ever get through it. But it's true what they say, family and friends get you through the rough moments in your life. That, and time.

On a totally different related note, aren't people suppose to bring US food when someone passes away? It's a good thing we catered, otherwise we wouldn't have eaten. :lol

You need new friends, Judy :lol wow

[JudynTX]

You need new friends, Judy :lol wow

Don't get me wrong, a "few" people brought dishes, but by the time we got back to my mom's house, almost all the food was gone. The hell?

Oh well, it was all for my mom. :)

[Viva Las Espuelas]

Don't get me wrong, a "few" people brought dishes, but by the time we got back to my mom's house, almost all the food was gone. The hell?

Oh well, it was all for my mom. :)

Shame on your mom's friends :)

[Mog]

Yeah, we always chow down after a funeral.

[mrsmaalox]

For my mom's services in October, we did the traditional Catholic thing too, because that is what my father wanted. My parents had burial insurance, but hadn't made any actual plans, so it all came about at the most difficult time, the day after her death. My brother and I would have probably opted for something a bit simpler but we honored my dad's wishes and it was pretty heavy on the rituals. As far as cost went, I have to admit I was pleasantly surprised; my dad went what I would call "upscale" and after his insurance ($5000) he paid about $1500 out of pocket---I know it's all relative to each family, but it's what he wanted and afforded it easily, I never felt that we were being gouged or steered out of our range.

I was worried that the rituals would be a bit much, but again, it was what Dad wanted (or I should say "needed"). The open casket was not an issue for me---I don't know about others, but I was never "forced" to stare at a corpse, and if anyone else felt that way, it was of their own mind because we certainly didn't expect it of anyone.

And as Judy said, its the friends and family that gets you thru. I am still overcome with warmth and emotion when I think of the family and friends who dropped $1000 each to fly in that week or those who drove all night to be there with us, neighbors who fed us for the entire week, and my brother's old high school friends who cleaned the house for us and got ready for guests, and the TONS (;) Judy) of food and drinks that were provided for the weekend long get together that we ended up having.

The hardest part is that without prior arrangements it's really tough to have to plan things like that at such a rotten time----pre planning is definitely a gift to your family. The tributes from friends added so much, we ended up with a musical tribute, a video tribute, poetry readings, a bagpipe (Amazing Grace) tribute, release of a flock of doves, and even high school football game dedicated to her memory with all the players wearing my Mom's initials on their helmets----all things that were lovely but we would have never thought of on our own under those circumstances but that thoughtful individuals were motivated to contribute and for which I am eternally greatful.

[clambake]

i wanna be buried in the political forum.

[CosmicCowboy]

When my sister died she was immediately cremated. Then we set a date about a month later for the "service". This allowed out of town guests (she had friends all across the country) to get reasonably priced airfare. I rented a church (right across the street from my house) including their parking lot, sanctuary, party/wedding room, etc. for the day.

We had about 150 people there...we did a non-religious "celebration of Liz" day, I MC'd it...all we talked about was good things and funny memories...had several of her friends speak about their memories with her...took about 30 minutes "upstairs"

Then went "downstairs"...I had done a bunch of BBQ (smoked beef tenderloin, smoked lamb, and BBQ chicken) and the rest of the meal was catered...had a slide show set to music of pictures of her over her life running while everyone ate...

Then let the old folks leave and moved the party with her friends and my sisters etc. to my house where I had tables set up under the oak trees (it was spring) and had a bar, beer, cases of wine, etc. ready...let the caterer/cleaning people i had hired clean up and pack up at the church...

I had done some really nice "photo books" of some of my sisters photography (she was an amateur photographer and had done several photo safaris/world trips) and gave those out to her friends...

A lot of wine and good memories were shared and everyone gradually drifted off as it got dark...

I thought it was by far the coolest "funeral" i'd ever been to...

[clambake]

i'm gonna have cc take care of my arrangements.

[Dex]

I am very sorry for your loss and am glad that you were able to fulfill your father's wishes.

Do you mind my asking how you might have felt had his request been the opposite? What if the person wants a large church service and a big funeral procession?

In big Catholic family tradition, we sort of have both. There is always a church service with a vigil, the Mass, and the graveside service... But then there is always afterward a large gathering that turns into laughter and celebration.

We would've honored my father's wishes, whatever they might have been, regardless of cost or our own personal opinions about them.

Personally, I would've made it through, but I feel like I would've had a lot harder time doing so. I've never been a big fan of open casket affairs, and I think that seeing my father lying there like that would've been a bit overwhelming. It's a sight that I'm glad I won't have burned in my memory going forward...seeing him deteriorate over the past few months and watching him pass in the hospital was quite enough. He was the type of guy where I don't think he wanted people sitting and looking at him in that state either.

[JudynTX]

And as Judy said, its the friends and family that gets you thru. I am still overcome with warmth and emotion when I think of the family and friends who dropped $1000 each to fly in that week or those who drove all night to be there with us, neighbors who fed us for the entire week, and my brother's old high school friends who cleaned the house for us and got ready for guests, and the TONS (;) Judy) of food and drinks that were provided for the weekend long get together that we ended up having.

LOL @ tons of food. My mom's funeral was paid for already, just the arrangements needed to be made. That was the 2nd worst part to get through. The worst part for me was having to go through her stuff and find her Will. :(

[Giuseppe]

I remember my father directing my brother (on the phone) as to the particulars of the his imminent funeral and service. What was to be served and the placement setting, etc.. It was an out of body experience. Thank goodness my brother was strong enough. I could not have made those calls.

[=RTM=]

"Rent" a Church!?

[CosmicCowboy]

"Rent" a Church!?

What would you call it if you told the preacher "I'll make an X amount dollar amount donation to the church to use all the facilities but I don't need you for the service, OK?"

[=RTM=]

What would you call it if you told the preacher "I'll make an X amount dollar amount donation to the church to use all the facilities but I don't need you for the service, OK?"

I call it "money talks".

[CosmicCowboy]

I call it "money talks".

Meh...don't get me wrong...this was just a neighborhood church (400+/- seats) that needed the money...It wasn't one of those 1604 mega churches where the preachers wipe their butt with hundred dollar bills. It was a high 3 figure donation plus paying the cleaning people and tipping the "helpers" that came with the deal. We were all satisfied with the result.

[TDMVPDPOY]

hey guys does it really matter how you like to go out on your own terms? compared to staying in the hospital on oxygen/life support, or live out the remaining days at home with ur family and love ones??...

my granddad +80yrs old has been on life support for the last 2 weeks in the hospital...family doesnt know whether we should pull the plug or bring him home to live out the remaining time he has left...(a couple of years ago he had the same problem also, he survive that)....

[CosmicCowboy]

hey guys does it really matter how you like to go out on your own terms? compared to staying in the hospital on oxygen/life support, or live out the remaining days at home with ur family and love ones??...

my granddad +80yrs old has been on life support for the last 2 weeks in the hospital...family doesnt know whether we should pull the plug or bring him home to live out the remaining time he has left...(a couple of years ago he had the same problem also, he survive that)....

I have sworn everyone close to me that if I get that way and haven't already killed myself they better get my ass in hospice and figure out a way to OD me with the morphine without it being obvious.

[CosmicCowboy]

I swear, I'm going out with a morphine bloody mary at sunrise in a place thats special to me outside with prior arrangements for the crematorium to pick me up.

[ididnotnothat]

It is called a living Will.

[CosmicCowboy]

It is called a living Will.

Pffft...

Been there, done that. It's not that easy.

[Viva Las Espuelas]

hey guys does it really matter how you like to go out on your own terms? compared to staying in the hospital on oxygen/life support, or live out the remaining days at home with ur family and love ones??...

my granddad +80yrs old has been on life support for the last 2 weeks in the hospital...family doesnt know whether we should pull the plug or bring him home to live out the remaining time he has left...(a couple of years ago he had the same problem also, he survive that)....

If it were me, I'd have him hime. I'd want my grandfather to be at ease and surrounded by his loved ones in his own home instead of a cold hospital. No visiting hours to bother with. My Mom did that for my grandmother so she could be comfortable with at least one thing in her last days.