So, a neutron walked into a bar...

[Woo Bum-kon]

...and said "I’d like a beer, please."
After the bartender gave him one, he said "How much will that be?"
"For you?" said the bartender "No charge."

:lol:lol:lol:downspin::toast:king

[russellgoat]

make me yours

[Trainwreck2100]

a photon checks into a hotel the guy at the desk asks if he needs help with his luggage
the photon replies
"no thanks i'm travelling light

[redzero]

Two atoms are sitting in a bar. One says to the other, "I think I've lost an electron." The other asks "Are you sure?" To which the first replies, "I'm positive."

[baseline bum]

You can talk to Martians, talk to The Planet of the Apes, tell the apes to gather some gas in a jar, and say ‘Hey apes! When PV=0 then T=-273!'

[FkLA]

sin(x), cos(x), and e^(x) go to party. sin(x) and cos(x) are having a great time but they notice that e^(x) is sitting in a corner by himself so they go up to him and ask 'whats wrong, why dont you integrate like us?', to which e^(x) replies 'it wouldnt make a difference.'

[Giuseppe]

Pete & Repeat went down to the Red River. Pete fell in, dumb fuck that he is. ? What the fuck is left?

[Trainwreck2100]

there's 10 kinds of people in this world, those that know binary and those that don't

[resistanze]

a photon checks into a hotel the guy at the desk asks if he needs help with his luggage
the photon replies
"no thanks i'm travelling light

i actually chuckled, smh.

[baseline bum]

Q: Why did the topologist's marriage fail?
A: Because he thought that arbitrary unions were open.

[resistanze]

How many moles are in a guacamole? Avocado's number.

[baseline bum]

http://www.jokelibrary.net/yyDrawings/math/math5c-number-sm.jpg

[Trainwreck2100]

A student asks his stats teacher if he know any statistics jokes
the teacher replied "probably"

[FkLA]

How many moles are in a guacamole? Avocado's number.

:lol

[redzero]

http://home.netcom.com/~swansont/flipacoin.jpg

[Trainwreck2100]

det schrodinger goods

[Trainwreck2100]

http://equinto.math.tufts.edu/students/205.jpg

[DMC]

So this woman was frying up some mackerel patties in the kitchen and her husband was in the living room cursing at the television. Later, the husband makes his way into the kitchen and beats her unconscious. Isn't that right Dale?

[Trainwreck2100]

http://i.imgur.com/dWhOY.jpg

[DeadlyDynasty]

How do you kill 50 flies?

Hit an Ethiopian in the face with a shovel.

[Venti Quattro]

Students nowadays are so clueless, the math professor complains to a colleague. "Yesterday, a student came to my office hours and wanted to know if General Calculus was a Roman war hero."

[jeebus]

What's the difference between a park bench and a black man?

The park bench can support a family of 4.

[baseline bum]

How did this thread turn from math/science jokes into racist jokes? :lol

[Trainwreck2100]

this is a joke thread for smart people

[Linsanity]

Why do black people stink?

So blind people can hate them too.

[DeadlyDynasty]

Why can't Stevie Wonder read?


Because he's black.

[jeebus]

Why do black people only have nightmares?


Because the last one to have a dream was shot.

[baseline bum]

^ God damn :lmao

[Venti Quattro]

Why do black people only have nightmares?


Because the last one to have a dream was shot.

:lmao :lmao :lmao :lmao :lmao

[Trainwreck2100]

http://i.imgur.com/ucOQh.jpg

[pass1st]

23 chromosomes
http://blacksportsonline.com/home/wp-content/gallery/hope-alexa/hope-alexa-dwight-howard-6.jpg

24
http://www.sciencephoto.com/image/256038/530wm/M1400324-Down_s_syndrome_woman-SPL.jpg

[ElNono]

Why do black people only have nightmares?


Because the last one to have a dream was shot.

:lol

[TE]

Why do black people only have nightmares?


Because the last one to have a dream was shot.

:lmao

[slick'81]

Why do black people only have nightmares?


Because the last one to have a dream was shot.


me and wife wont stop laughing smdh:lol

[Flintstones32]

Albert Einstein arrives at a party and introduces
himself to the first person he sees and asks, "What is
your IQ?" to which the man answers "241." "That is
wonderful!" says Albert. "We will talk about the Grand
Unification Theory and the mysteries of the universe.
We will have much to discuss!"

Next Albert introduces himself to a woman and asks,
"What is your IQ?" to which the lady answers, "144."
"That is great!" says Albert. "We can discuss politics
and current affairs. We will have much to discuss!"

Albert then goes to another person and asks, "What is
your IQ?" to which the man answers, "51." Albert
ponders this for a moment, and then says, "GO
REDSKINS!"

[silverblk mystix]

How many existentialists does it take to change a lightbulb?
Two. One to change the lightbulb and one to observe how the lightbulb symbolizes an incandescent beacon of subjectivity in a netherworld of Cosmic Nothingness.

How many Marxists does it take to change a lightbulb?
None. The lightbulb contains the seeds of its own revolution.

How many Episcopalians does it take to change a light bulb?
Six. One to change the bulb, and five to form a society to preserve the memory of the old light bulb.

[silverblk mystix]

How many particles does it take to change a light bulb?
Depends on how "excited" they are about the job.

[gambit1990]

how many waitresses does it take to change a light bulb?
three. two to bitch about it and one to get the manager.

[DeadlyDynasty]

How many Vietnam vets does it take to screw in a light bulb?

You don't know, man! You weren't there!