I am a historian

[I. Hustle]

I come from a long line of historians. My father was a historian, his father was a historian as was his and so on and so forth. I travel the land constantly researching and observing. I was born in the year of our Lord 1843 and have been able to remain with the living by feeding my brain knowledge of track, American football and of course horrible music.
My mission in life is not only to learn about history but to rewrite it. In this time my name is I. Hustle... in another time my name is RaZor. The world stays the same but the times are completely different. I can't tell you what the future holds unless I have already changed the past... or you ask me tomorrow.
As a hobby I search and destroy trolls... TROLLS... TTTTTRRRRROOOLLLLSSSSS HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

[I. Hustle]

This is my portrait

http://www.cenacle.com.au/userimages/user-8037928_1167901426.jpg

[cantthinkofanything]

^ Doodystache!

[I. Hustle]

That is not a moustache... it's my cigar... my hands were full...

[cantthinkofanything]

That is not a moustache... it's my cigar... my hands were full...

what???? oh...no..I was talking about your hat. Classic Doodystache.

[mrsmaalox]

This is my portrait

http://www.cenacle.com.au/userimages/user-8037928_1167901426.jpg

Whoa. Opulence, you have it!

[Cyrano]

Is there some reason you wear your anal beads on your hat?

[I. Hustle]

Is there some reason you wear your anal beads on your hat?

Each strand is a conquest. Historically speaking of course

[cantthinkofanything]

Is there some reason you wear your anal beads on your hat?

I'm more concerned about the anal star on the hat

[Cyrano]

And why are you using coconut macaroons for buttons?

[Avante]

You gotta love "internet mentality". Here I am talking Lon Myers, Sylvester Weaver, Eulace Peacock, Georgia Tech 222 Cumberland 0 and I'm not an historian? Totally into/up on the histories of football, track and them blues but I'm not an historian:rolleyes The first black sprinter to hold a sprint world record was Howard Drew. The first 1000 yard rusher in NFL history was Beattie Feathers but I'm not an historian? Would anyone believe that Michigan once went three seasons and gave up only 12 points? In those three years they scored over 80 points in 6 games, once beat Buffalo 128-0, but I'm not an historian.

Ya gotta love it:hat

How how those prewar Alabama blues? Jaybird Coleman, Ed Bell, Walter Roland, Bullet Williams, Lucille Bogan, Daddy Stovepipe, hell no no historian here.

[cantthinkofanything]

You gotta love "internet mentality". Here I am talking Lon Myers, Sylvester Weaver, Eulace Peacock, Georgia Tech 222 Cumberland 0 and I'm not an historian? Totally into/up on the histories of football, track and them blues but I'm not an historian:rolleyes The first black sprinter to hold a sprint world record was Howard Drew. The first 1000 yard rusher in NFL history was Beattie Feathers but I'm not an historian? Would anyone believe that Michigan once went three seasonws and gave up only 12 points? In those three years they scored over 80 points in 6 games, once beat Buffalo 128-0, but I'm not an historian.

Ya gotta love it:hat

You're a histrioran.

[Avante]

You're a histrioran.

It's cool to be able to talk with anyone about something, knowing you have it totally covered.

[cantthinkofanything]

It's cool to be able to talk with anyone about something, knowing you have it totally covered.

I bet.

[Clipper Nation]

You gotta love "internet mentality". Here I am talking Lon Myers, Sylvester Weaver, Eulace Peacock, Georgia Tech 222 Cumberland 0 and I'm not an historian? Totally into/up on the histories of football, track and them blues but I'm not an historian:rolleyes The first black sprinter to hold a sprint world record was Howard Drew. The first 1000 yard rusher in NFL history was Beattie Feathers but I'm not an historian? Would anyone believe that Michigan once went three seasons and gave up only 12 points? In those three years they scored over 80 points in 6 games, once beat Buffalo 128-0, but I'm not an historian.

Ya gotta love it:hat

How how those prewar Alabama blues? Jaybird Coleman, Ed Bell, Walter Roland, Bullet Williams, Lucille Bogan, Daddy Stovepipe, hell no no historian here.
Damn, Google's servers are getting overloaded by this cat... :lol

[Avante]

Damn, Google's servers are getting overloaded by this cat... :lol

Let's try reality, I have the books, the music. 50 years of experience.

[cantthinkofanything]

"Beattie Feathers"...lol. Made up name.

[Avante]

"Beattie Feathers"...lol. Made up name.

Care to wager 30 days self bannisment?

[cantthinkofanything]

Care to wager 30 days self bannisment?

No, you've probably already created a fake entry in Wikipedia.

[Avante]

No, you've probably already created a fake entry in Wikipedia.

Here ya go...

paste


No one before Beattie Feathers had ever gained 1,000 yards rushing in a season, and no one repeated his feat for another thirteen seasons, until Steve Van Buren of the Philadelphia Eagles gained 1,008 yards in 1947. But he rushed for over 1,000 yards in 1934 and broke a barrier many thought impossible at that time. He was the star halfback on this historic team and was the main reason Coach George Halas moved the famed Red Grange primarily to wide receiver. Hall of Famer Bronko Nagurski said of Beattie: "Watching him run reminded me of watching a jackrabbit in a cornfield with a hound chasing him. He would change his pace and his direction all the time. He also stayed close to his interference. Beattie would stay with you as long as you could do him some good then he'd make his cut and go off on his own. "


Are these fake names?

Fair Hooker
Mozelle Ellerbe
Handsome Wearing
Hiawatha Francisco
Ivory Crockett
Haven Moses

[cantthinkofanything]

My counter:

Wilson Magoo laced up his shoes that cold winter day. His retirement from professional football looming three hours away, he had no expectations of becoming the first man to rush for over 1,000 yards. However, his coach, Johnson Filipetti, had other ideas. Over the next 60 minutes of game time, Magoo carried the ball an astonishing 47 times, racking up an improbable 375 yards in rushing. The crowd went wild as the final gun went off, leaving Wilson Magoo as the first man to have rushed for over 1,000 yards during the season. History will always remember the number 1,002. Magoo's season total.

Read more: www.Avantesucksballs.com

[Clipper Nation]

Here ya go...

paste


No one before Beattie Feathers had ever gained 1,000 yards rushing in a season, and no one repeated his feat for another thirteen seasons, until Steve Van Buren of the Philadelphia Eagles gained 1,008 yards in 1947. But he rushed for over 1,000 yards in 1934 and broke a barrier many thought impossible at that time. He was the star halfback on this historic team and was the main reason Coach George Halas moved the famed Red Grange primarily to wide receiver. Hall of Famer Bronko Nagurski said of Beattie: "Watching him run reminded me of watching a jackrabbit in a cornfield with a hound chasing him. He would change his pace and his direction all the time. He also stayed close to his interference. Beattie would stay with you as long as you could do him some good then he'd make his cut and go off on his own. "
http://bleacherreport.com/articles/444947-beattie-feathers-a-forgotten-legend

:lol Bleacher Report

[Avante]

My counter:

Wilson Magoo laced up his shoes that cold winter day. His retirement from professional football looming three hours away, he had no expectations of becoming the first man to rush for over 1,000 yards. However, his coach, Johnson Filipetti, had other ideas. Over the next 60 minutes of game time, Magoo carried the ball an astonishing 47 times, racking up an improbable 375 yards in rushing. The crowd went wild as the final gun went off, leaving Wilson Magoo as the first man to have rushed for over 1,000 yards during the season. History will always remember the number 1,002. Magoo's season total.

Read more: www.Avantesucksballs.com (http://www.Avantesucksballs.com)

I can't blame ya, everytime you mess with me two things come out of it. One is you don't know shit, the other is you can stand it that I do.

Here ya go little fella...

He was known as Blind Dawg Jones, yep a blind running back for Blufton State. After he got the ball his QB (a tall white cat named Billy Bob Bodine) would yell out where he was to run. At 256 pounds Blind Dawg was a load. He also had 4.5 speed. He was twice the league MVP nd is still that schools all time leading rusher.

True or false?

[cantthinkofanything]

I can't blame ya, everytime you mess with me two things come out of it. One is you don't know shit, the other is you can stand it that I do.

I suppose you've never heard of Clancy Dinglesnoot either?

[Avante]

I suppose you've never heard of Clancy Dinglesnoot either?

You work way too hard at trying to be cute/funny. It backfires, trust me!

[cantthinkofanything]

so that's a "no". Got it!

[Avante]

so that's a "no". Got it!

I don't know when you bring the comedy bit I really don't pay any attention.

Make silly faces in a mirrow for a half hour or so before doing this get all that silly shit out of your system.

[cantthinkofanything]

I don't know when you bring the comedy bit I really don't pay any attention.

Make silly faces in a mirrow for a half hour or so before doing this get all that silly shit out of your system.

Ah...there's the problem. Ok, every time before I bring the comedy bit, I'll go, "DING!". And that will let you know that hilarity is just around the corner.

[Avante]

Ah...there's the problem. Ok, every time before I bring the comedy bit, I'll go, "DING!". And that will let you know that hilarity is just around the corner.

Why all the bullshit dude? Just act like a grown up with a brain..ok? You seem to have this need for others reading this stuff to think you are funny...why? Clowns are funny in the circus not so funny standing at your door.

[Clipper Nation]

:lol Bleacher Report plagiarist
:lol "Historian" who steals his material from the world's shittiest sports website

[cantthinkofanything]

Why all the bullshit dude? Just act like a grown up with a brain..ok? You seem to have this need for others reading this stuff to think you are funny...why? Clowns are funny in the circus not so funny standing at your door.

or lurking in the sewers

[Avante]

:lol Bleacher Report plagiarist
:lol "Historian" who steals his material from the world's shittiest sports website

How about I own a lot of books? Have a ton of experience.

[Clipper Nation]

Bleacher Report sells books now? They must be picture books tbh...

[Avante]

Bleacher Report sells books now? They must be picture books tbh...

Dude, it's not working..ok? You might be some punk kid, I'm not. Grow up!

[I. Hustle]

I have many leather bound books as well and my apartment smells of rich mahogany. We should get together for a drink and discuss long jumpers.

[cantthinkofanything]

I have many leather bound books as well and my apartment smells of rich mahogany. We should get together for a drink and discuss long jumpers.

Hey...that's my porn name..."Rich Mahogany".

[Avante]

I have many leather bound books as well and my apartment smells of rich mahogany. We should get together for a drink and discuss long jumpers.

Great idea, we could start with those 26 plus footers who played in the NFL.

Eric Metcalf..Browns/Texas..his dad Terry a 25-10 guy while at LBSt
James Lofton...Packers/Stanford
James McAlister...Eagles/UCLA
Vance Johnson...Broncos/Arizona
Chris Sanders...Titans/Ohio St
Latin Berry...Rams/Oregon
Bo Roberson...Raiders/Cornell...1960 Oly silver medalist
Johnny Hector..Jets/Tex A&M
Paul Warfield...Dolphins/Ohio State

[cantthinkofanything]

Great idea, we could start with those 26 plus footers who played in the NFL.

Eric Metcalf..Browns/Texas..his dad Terry a 25-10 guy while at LBSt
James Lofton...Packers/Stanford
James McAlister...Eagles/UCLA
Vance Johnson...Broncos/Arizona
Chris Sanders...Titans/Ohio St
Latin Berry...Rams/Oregon
Bo Robinson...Raiders/Cornell...1960 Oly silver medalist
Johnny Hector..Jets/Tex A&M
Paul Warfield...Dolphins/Ohio State

hey jackass...it's Bo Roberson.

and why they all got to be black?

[Clipper Nation]

Dude, it's not working..ok? You might be some punk kid, I'm not. Grow up!

:lol Insisting that it's not working
:lol Proving that it actually is
:lol Bleacher Report historian

[Avante]

hey jackass...it's Bo Roberson.

and why they all got to be black?

I agree...EL DUHO! Robinson???

A white long jumper in the NFL..hmmm?

We did see white world class hurdlers...Richmond Flowers Tenn and Jerry Tarr Oregon. White 9.3 sprinter John Roderick out of SMU. All three of them did..0.

Been ages since we've seen a great white American long jumper.

[cantthinkofanything]

I agree...EL DUHO! Robinson???

A white long jumper in the NFL..hmmm?

We did see white world class hurdlers...Richmond Flowers Tenn and Jerry Tarr Oregon. White 9.3 sprinter John Roderick out of SMU. All three of them did..0.

Been ages since we've seen a great white American long jumper.

Perhaps you were thinking of Bo Jackson then Jackie Robinson and ended up with Bo Robinson.

But I don't know about any white long jumpers.

[johnsmith]

LOL, so now the great gambler has proven that he doesn't know how to read odds and he steals his info from bleacher report.

Good job jackass.

[Avante]

Perhaps you were thinking of Bo Jackson then Jackie Robinson and ended up with Bo Robinson.

But I don't know about any white long jumpers.

Jackie Robinson was a 25 footer while at Pasadena City, he also jumped offer 25 at UCLA. Little known fact is that his older brother was a 1936 Olympic 200m medalist, Mack Robinson. He was an Oregon Duck.

[Avante]

LOL, so now the great gambler has proven that he doesn't know how to read odds and he steals his info from bleacher report.

Good job jackass.

The Bleacher Report? What would I need to know from there?

What do you do besides whimper?

[cantthinkofanything]

Jackie Robinson was a 25 footer while at Pasadena City, he also jumped offer 25 at UCLA. Little known fact is that his older brother was a 1936 Olympic 200m medalist, Mack Robinson. He was an Oregon Duck.

another semi famous Mac who was also a duck...Mac Wilkins.

[Clipper Nation]

You copy/pasted a Bleacher Report article in this very thread to "prove your knowledge" about something tbh...

[Avante]

You copy/pasted a Bleacher Report article in this very thread to "prove your knowledge" about something tbh...

I just went looking for something. Bleacher Report....ok

It would be cool if I didn't have to prove things, but as we know it can't be like that.

I'm having a ball with this however. When you really are what you say you are it's so cool. All this...you have to Google...and shit like that is fun-knee. How long before you people finally figure it our? Long time footbal/track/blues freak here.

[I. Hustle]

Being what you say you are IS the best. I love it is well.
It's like... people... just don't get it. I just am what I am.
As for you all that are attacking Ava... that's all I can stands, I can't stands no more

[I. Hustle]

Lets talk about Spanish cheeses.

[Spartacus]

I am Spartacus!

[redzero]

lol historian who needs Bleacher Report and Wikipedia.

[The Reckoning]

looks like a picture of vlad the impaler aka dracula tbh...the savior of europe and destroyer of the muslim turks

[Avante]

lol historian who needs Bleacher Report and Wikipedia.

You really don't get that?

I don't need anything off the net but if I want to show somebody something.......

Getting it now?

If I want you to hear Alabama bluesman Ed Bell here comes youtube.....right?

If I want you to learn about footballer Tank Younger here comes some article off.....

Now think, how do I know what to look for....well? Do you honestly believe I just picked football/track/blues to lie about...hahahahaha!!!!!!!!!

I just can't be a long long time fan/historian can I, when I've proven that I am.

Now you're getting comical, everything I say..."nope it can't be that way",,,hahahaha!!!!!

Here ya go try and Google this....

In high school what two sprinters beat the great Bob Hayes?

[Slomo]

looks like a picture of vlad the impaler aka dracula tbh...the savior of europe and destroyer of the muslim turks

http://www.cikava.com/gallery/albums/Smack/ding_ding_ding.jpg

[Clipper Nation]

:lol Bleacher Report historian

[Avante]

:lol Bleacher Report historian

Talk to me about Speed City.

[I. Hustle]

Forget about the trolls Ava, let's talk about Nov. 12th 1892 and how Pudge Heffelfinger changed life as we know it (or at least was a huge part of that change).

[Clipper Nation]

Talk to me about Speed City.
:lol Wikipedia/Google/Bleacher Report historian

[Avante]

Forget about the trolls Ava, let's talk about Nov. 12th 1892 and how Pudge Heffelfinger changed life as we know it (or at least was a huge part of that change).

What gets lost is just how good those Ivy League and the military schools were way back then. Where did you learn about Heffelfinger from?

[Avante]

:lol Wikipedia/Google/Bleacher Report historian

That's funny for a second...ok?

Now let's talk about San Jose and Speed City, can you?

[Clipper Nation]

That's funny for a second...ok?

Now let's talk about San Jose and Speed City, can you?

:lol Only wants to talk about random shit he just Googled

[cantthinkofanything]

What gets lost is just how good those Ivy League and the military schools were way back then.

Can you believe that U.C. Berkeley ever played in the Rose Bowl? Well it's true. What if I told you that a player for Berkeley has a 69 yard run but his team still had to punt? Well it's true.

[Avante]

:lol Only wants to talk about random shit he just Googled

Who in the fuck thinks...I think I'll Google Speed City......hahahaha!!!!! Dude, do you think at al before posting?

I grew up in Cali, I'm a big speed freak and have been since the early 60's...ok? I don't Google anything "unless" I;m showing somebody something...got it?

[Avante]

Can you believe that U.C. Berkeley ever played in the Rose Bowl? Well it's true. What if I told you that a player for Berkeley has a 69 yard run but his team still had to punt? Well it's true.

What if I told a high school once went three seasons without allowing the opposition in their territory?

[cantthinkofanything]

What if I told a high school once went three seasons without allowing the opposition in their territory?

What if I told you that a football team once sewed brown football shaped patches on their jerseys to confuse the other team? And the other team responded by dying the balls to match their jersey color!?!?!!!?

[Clipper Nation]

Talk to me about Bleacher Report :lol

[Avante]

What if I told you that a football team once sewed brown football shaped patches on their jerseys to confuse the other team? And the other team responded by dying the balls to match their jersey color!?!?!!!?

What if I told you St Augustine college once had a fullback who led that league in rushing for 8 years.

[cantthinkofanything]

What if I told you St Augustine college once had a fullback who led that league in rushing for 8 years.

What if I told you that a field goal was once blocked? BY A PLAYER JUMPING OVER THE CROSSBAR?????

[I. Hustle]

What if I told you that I had an 18 inch... antenna on the back of my truck? To detect alien signals

[Avante]

What if I told you that a field goal was once blocked? BY A PLAYER JUMPING OVER THE CROSSBAR?????

RC Owens!

What if I told you Gale Sayers had a brother faster than he was?

[Avante]

What if I told you that I had an 18 inch... antenna on the back of my truck? To detect alien signals

Any success?

[cantthinkofanything]

RC Owens!

What if I told you Gale Sayers had a brother faster than he was?

What if I told you that a player once made a great touchdown saving tackle in the Cotton Bowl? COMING FROM OFF THE FIELD!??!?!!?

[cantthinkofanything]

What if I told you that I had an 18 inch... antenna on the back of my truck? To detect alien signals

hahahha. you're looking in the wrong place.

[I. Hustle]

What gets lost is just how good those Ivy League and the military schools were way back then. Where did you learn about Heffelfinger from?

I went to school with him. I used to date his sister Louise and tell her that I had a helluvafinger for her. By date I mean we just had a lot of sex.

[Avante]

What if I told you that a player once made a great touchdown saving tackle in the Cotton Bowl? COMING FROM OFF THE FIELD!??!?!!?

I am holding that picture of Tommy Lewis tackling Dickie Moegle in my hand.

[Avante]

I went to school with him. I used to date his sister Louise and tell her that I had a helluvafinger for her. By date I mean we just had a lot of sex.

A lot of people didn't know that they were twins. They were adopted you know. Years later Louise found out her mother was a cherokee princess. Her father had stolen her, her tribe finally found her after she had the twins, they killed the father.

[I. Hustle]

hahahha. you're looking in the wrong place.

What are you talking about? Texas is a hotbed for alien activity. Why just two weeks ago I received a transmission from some unidentified location. I've come close to breaking it down mathematically but I am still not able to decode it completely.
It didn't sound hostile and as a matter of fact it almost sounded like a distress signal.

[I. Hustle]

A lot of people didn't know that they were twins. They were adopted you know. Years later Louise found out her mother a cherokee princess. Her father had stolen her.

Don't know about any of that but his sister Mary Ellen gave the best darn dome I ever received up to that point. I was still only about 103 or 115 years old then.

[cantthinkofanything]

What are you talking about? Texas is a hotbed for alien activity. Why just two weeks ago I received a transmission from some unidentified location. I've come close to breaking it down mathematically but I am still not able to decode it completely.
It didn't sound hostile and as a matter of fact it almost sounded like a distress signal.

I mean that they are already here. At least from a cross breeding standpoint Others will say that 100% aliens are on the planet and are able to shapeshift into human form. Which I'm not ready to buy into.

There's also those who think that there maybe be intelligent life deep below the sea. If some sea life evolved and moved on to land to eventually become humans, who's to say that some sea life didn't move the other way and adapt in to some intelligent life?

Anyway, my point being that if there is concern about alien life interacting with humans, we should start looking very hard at human DNA and the great technological leaps we've made throughout history. I would highly recommend the show "Ancient Aliens" if you are interested in further research on the matter.

[cantthinkofanything]

^ further thinking...

I do believe that the Greys that are visiting and cross breeding with humans are actually the evolution of humans.

[I. Hustle]

Balderdash! I've lived for over 3 centuries and I think that I would have come across an alien or two during my time on this planet. I like your ideas but the one about aliens coming from the sea? LOL I started that one in a snug. It was over a few drops of whiskey with the towns priest. Funny how that is still going.

[cantthinkofanything]

Balderdash! I've lived for over 3 centuries and I think that I would have come across an alien or two during my time on this planet. I like your ideas but the one about aliens coming from the sea? LOL I started that one in a snug. It was over a few drops of whiskey with the towns priest. Funny how that is still going.

Obviously you're too self absorbed to notice that they walk among us. And again, I don't think they are the aliens themselves but rather humans that have been engineered with alien DNA. You can't explain evolution from a single cell organism in the sea to a human that plays video games for fun. Or even from a monkey. You must have some sort of alien intervention to explain it. Once you get over that hurdle, everything falls in to place.

[spurs_fan_in_exile]

This is my portrait

http://www.cenacle.com.au/userimages/user-8037928_1167901426.jpg

Jim Croce faked his death and now spends his days posting as I. Hustle. This is all starting to make sense.

[cantthinkofanything]

Jim Croce faked his death and now spends his days posting as I. Hustle. This is all starting to make sense.

Nice call. Perhaps you also saw Billie Squire in the scientist thread. This all goes to further enforce my theory about aliens. In the old days, being a scientist or historian meant that you got all the chicks so obviously, those are professions that an alien shapeshifter would choose. Over time, the musicians became the babe magnets so they moved to these positions. It explains the shocking resemblance between the historian/scientist and Croce/Squire. Obviously, the historian alien had far less sexual ambitions than the scientist alien. Who oddly enough had very homosexual overtones later in his career. Which there's nothing wrong with.

[I. Hustle]

Jim Croce faked his death and now spends his days posting as I. Hustle. This is all starting to make sense.

Lol I remember those days. I've been others since then.

[spurs_fan_in_exile]

OK, so I checked out that "I am a scientist" thread and it's all clear now. Jim Croce and Billy Squire have been trying to cut each other's heads for centuries.

[cantthinkofanything]

OK, so I checked out that "I am a scientist" thread and it's all clear now. Jim Croce and Billy Squire have been trying to cut each other's heads for centuries.

sounds like something we can solve on Spurstalk

[I. Hustle]

OK, so I checked out that "I am a scientist" thread and it's all clear now. Jim Croce and Billy Squire have been trying to cut each other's heads for centuries.

There must be only one.