Homeland Security
09-14-2012, 10:13 AM
So anyway due to some total homeland security collapses, a Muslim terrorist cell is able to smuggle a nuke into Detroit and detonate it. The scene is horrific.
Meanwhile, in the New York Times newsroom, everyone has heard the news and are now weeping uncontrollably. An intern walks in and sees everyone crying.
"I know," she says, "this is horrible. I can't believe we've been attacked!"
"No, it's not that," the editors wail.
"Then it must be the human tragedy, the terrible loss of life," she replied.
"No, it's not that," the editors sob.
Confused, she says, "Then it must be how frightening it is to know we and our families are not safe, especially here in New York."
"No, it's not that," the editors moan.
Furrowing her brow, she asks, "Is it knowing that soon the whole world probably will be at war?"
"No, it's not that," the editors whine.
"Then what is it? What are you crying about?"
"Now Romney's gonna win Michigan! WAAAAAAAAA!"
Meanwhile, in the New York Times newsroom, everyone has heard the news and are now weeping uncontrollably. An intern walks in and sees everyone crying.
"I know," she says, "this is horrible. I can't believe we've been attacked!"
"No, it's not that," the editors wail.
"Then it must be the human tragedy, the terrible loss of life," she replied.
"No, it's not that," the editors sob.
Confused, she says, "Then it must be how frightening it is to know we and our families are not safe, especially here in New York."
"No, it's not that," the editors moan.
Furrowing her brow, she asks, "Is it knowing that soon the whole world probably will be at war?"
"No, it's not that," the editors whine.
"Then what is it? What are you crying about?"
"Now Romney's gonna win Michigan! WAAAAAAAAA!"