cantthinkofanything
10-16-2012, 11:45 AM
was driving down old I20 this morning when Lucy (my car) starting making a strange noise. Pulled over and poppsed the hood to take a look. I don't know anything about cars so I decided to replace the motor. Made a quick call to Stu (he's the man when it comes to combustion engines) and within minutes he showed up with a new engine. Holy fuck...I'm not as young as I used to be and this thing was f'ing heavy. It took both of us to take out the old engine and put the new one in. Anyhow, while I was tightening up the connections, a white 'Vette pulled up on the side of the road. I glanced over my shoulder in time to see a long leggy thing sliding out of the driver's seat. High heels, short skirt...strutting over to me. I'm covered with engine grease and bad intentions and open for anything. I tell Stu, "get lost...I've got it from here". Stu takes off. Legs walks up to my side. I don't give her the time of day...I'm busy replacing the engine and making connections. Legs leans over. Whiskers against my ear. Now I'm having trouble concentrating. Boobs against my head. Now, I see an obvious bulge beginning to form in the skirt. Battery...check. Engine cord...check. Wiper fluid...check. Bulge pressed up against the back of my thigh. As she whispers in my ear, her braces tug at my hair. Pain yet pleasure. I slam the hood down...open the door and put Lucy in neutral. I push her down the embankment, turn...shrug my shoulders. Hell...I'll find another cars. Maybe even claim Lucy on my insurance policy. Who cares. I jump kick the tranny in the face and run to the Vette...hop in and drive away. Later I end up in jail for running redlights and shooting my pistol out the window. But fuck it. I was just going to by some Doritos anyway.