If Jesus Became an NBA Player Upon his Return, Which Team?

[DMC]

Nevermind Jesus Shuttlesworth or Black Jesus Jordan, who would Jesus H Christ play for were he to return and play in the league? He's got long hair so teams like SA might not want him, then again he'd be a Bible beater so he might be a Spur, or would he be part of the monkeyballers? He's got holes in his hands so expect some turnovers, and those feet could cause some time on the bench (plus he's a white Jew).

Tough call.

[HI-FI]

probably Lakers because LA has so many phony douchebag fans who need to turn from taking loads in their ass and repent tbh

[timvp]

Jazz.

/thread

[Bynumite]

lol spurfans and their inferiority complex :lol

[ElNono]

Jazz.

/thread

You might be onto something there... White, son of god coming to America, never had a beer...

[apalisoc_9]

http://gifsoup.com/webroot/animatedgifs3/1582326_o.gif

http://itsalwayssunnyindetroit.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/Stoudemire_Battier_GIF.gif

[DMC]

http://media.theonion.com/images/articles/article/1996/Jesus-Dunking_jpg_600x1000_q85.jpg



http://www.theonion.com/articles/christ-returns-to-nba,1996/

[Brunodf]

Bobcats

[Mori Chu]

LOL what is that GIF from, the one of Jesus getting dunked on?

[lefty]

Jesus is black so not Minnesota

[BRHornet45]

sons Jesus wouldn't play or take part in a third rate league/sports entertainment racket like the NBA. he would head straight to the NFL and be the leading wide receiver for Drew "by God" Brees.

[baseline bum]

http://gifsoup.com/webroot/animatedgifs3/1582326_o.gif


Nig_as got no D. That TOSB would be lucky to make the Toros.

[Venti Quattro]

If Jesus was a player, he'd probably be a chucker because he's too holy to get physical inside. He'll just settle for miracle outside shots.

Not a good player to have on your team.

[irishock]

The grammar in the title..... sheessh

[Baseline]

If Jesus was a player, he'd probably be a chucker because he's too holy to get physical inside. He'll just settle for miracle outside shots.

Not a good player to have on your team.

Of course a Laker fan would say this. See, it would be a sin to not pass the ball to a guy who has a better shot.

But Laker fans don't understand this, because for over a decade they've watched their own Messiah jack up horrible shot after horrible shot, while passing up open shooter after open shooter.

[Venti Quattro]

Of course a Laker fan would say this. See, it would be a sin to not pass the ball to a guy who has a better shot.

But Laker fans don't understand this, because for over a decade they've watched their own Messiah jack up horrible shot after horrible shot, while passing up open shooter after open shooter.
Do you not trust Jesus to make a miracle?

[FkLA]

http://assets.sbnation.com/assets/570639/IMG_8656_-_Copy_medium.JPG

[Trainwreck2100]

Jesus would have joined the spurs and class ball would become bibleball