How many times you wipe after you poop?

[InRareForm]

At least 4/5.

[Darth_Pelican]

till the tp no longer turns brown

[Pauly D]

It wasn't a lot of blood, not even a whole drop, but by the 6th wipe or so there would be a little red there on the toilet paper! At some point you have to just call your losses and leave a little brown deep in the crack. I'll live


nah. I'm about 6'1 215 lbs. I may be slightly overweight but that has nothing to do with it. Maybe it's just cause I have a hairy ass and the poop rubs off on it as it's going out?



the hairy asshole part just comes with the conversation. For me and my friends it mostly starts with us talking about an annoying shit or nice epic shit and then we'd say something like "yeah, it was great, but I still had to wipe like 100 times"

you know, something like that

This is an important topic so a quick update from my old thread, I've learned the most efficient angles to minimize the number. Wet wipes never worked well with me. Also, shaving my asshole actually made my number go up almost every sitting. I don't understand why.

[cantthinkofanything]

till the tp no longer turns brown

bingo.

[InRareForm]

Using a damp tp as your finisher does a good job on sending you on your way.

[DisAsTerBot]

a damp tp? do you shimmy over to the sink? ever heard of a wet wipe?

[Koolaid_Man]

At least 4/5.

Depends are we talking using our hands like the Turkish or regular tp.....:lol

[Koolaid_Man]

till the tp no longer turns brown

2 wipes for me...I swipe the first time....and then one final swipe using sanitizing wet ones...I use wet ones to keep my ass sanitized and shiney new..never know when I'm gonna run into a butt munching white slut :lol

[cantthinkofanything]

2 wipes for me...I swipe the first time....and then one final swipe using sanitizing wet ones...I use wet ones to keep my ass sanitized and shiney new..never know when I'm gonna run into a butt munching white slut :lol

I'm surprised. I figured you and your boyfriend hold your shits until you can hook up and poop on each other's faces. And dual buttlick each other until all is clean.

[The Gemini Method]

Until I wreck a coniferous forest tbh.

[MultiTroll]

https://encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRm8npJmN_xylYdZgjmaVaJLg4ea9NrD czWhiHyesLEI-6Y9IFdfg

[Blake]

Lol

[ChumpDumper]

https://encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRm8npJmN_xylYdZgjmaVaJLg4ea9NrD czWhiHyesLEI-6Y9IFdfgYou are an especially shitty person.

[MultiTroll]

Fuck does your ass just explode every time?
RumpHumper-Blake posting within 60 seconds after mention of my ass is made. :toast

"Never". Not a one in a million chance, not a one in a billion chance.

[ChumpDumper]

RumpHumper-Blake posting within 60 seconds after mention of my ass is made. :toast

"Never". Not a one in a million chance, not a one in a billion chance.I believe you have never wiped your ass.

You're an especially shitty person.

[Infinite_limit]

till the tp no longer turns brown
After brown is yellow. Need to get that also

[Ignignokt]

Blake and Rumphumper have each other, they don't need toilet paper imho

[ChumpDumper]

gtown's dream is to be attached to my ass Human Centipede style.

[Ignignokt]

gtown's dream is to be attached to my ass Human Centipede style.

Why are you the only one on record stating that fantasy?

[ChumpDumper]

Why are you the only one on record stating that fantasy?Jesus you're sensitive these days. I stated it because you want it. No thanks tho.

Why do you state hundreds of homosexual fantasies about me?

[Avante]

This is why I feel so damn superior.

A thread about how many times you wipe your ass. And nobody is...."who cares?"' That says it all

I'm leaving now no way I'm posting in a thread this damn stupid.

[MultiTroll]

Why are you the only one on record stating that fantasy?
RumpHumper is really on the defensive, going into his spin cycle.
:lol Comes in less then 60 seconds after he hears mention of my ass.

[ChumpDumper]

RumpHumper is really on the defensive, going into his spin cycle.
:lol Comes in less then 60 seconds after he hears mention of my ass.lol Fabbs really wants me to want his ass.

No thanks. gtown might be interested tho.

[SupremeGuy]

till the tp no longer turns brownThis. As many as it takes.

[RD2191]

No wiper. I'm that good.

[cantthinkofanything]

No wiper. I'm that good.

If you eat right and take care of yourself, one obligatory wipe is all you need. Even though you could get by with none at all.

[Koolaid_Man]

I'm surprised. I figured you and your boyfriend hold your shits until you can hook up and poop on each other's faces. And dual buttlick each other until all is clean.

You have mind blowingly awesome fetishes :lol

[cantthinkofanything]

You have mind blowingly awesome fetishes :lol

LOLZ

[chunticakes]

How do the blind know how many times to wipe? That has always fascinated me...

[Blake]

How do the blind know how many times to wipe? That has always fascinated me...

Lol

[DJR210]

This. As many as it takes.

By any means necessary.

[InRareForm]

Taco bell usually requires a full roll or immediate shower

[Ignignokt]

Jesus you're sensitive these days. I stated it because you want it. No thanks tho.

Why do you state hundreds of homosexual fantasies about me?


tthssttapppppppp!!.

[Koolaid_Man]

By any means necessary.


So who's the black bull behind you in your avatar?

[Pauly D]

So who's the black bull behind you in your avatar?

The fact that you're asking about that is so telling. Drop the "pounding pussy" act and embrace your black, homosexual fetishes. We've all been waiting

[DJR210]

So who's the black bull behind you in your avatar?

It's actually your boy Technique with the white pants around his ankles, and the black bull is Samuel

[DJR210]

.

[spurraider21]

This is why I feel so damn superior.

A thread about how many times you wipe your ass. And nobody is...."who cares?"' That says it all

I'm leaving now no way I'm posting in a thread this damn stupid.
So you came into this thread to post about how you aren't going to post in this thread.

Makes sense

[Franklin]

it depends on whether you take a shower right afterwards imho.

[Mr Hanky]

Who the hell counts!?!? Just wipe till the job is done.

[Strange Love]

I bet OP uses the Sheryl Crow technique. :lol

[~O~]

Its better to take a shower immediately afterwards.

[Biernutz]

Another shity SpursTalk thread.......

[TDMVPDPOY]

i love it when ur mom or sister licks my ass, saves me water and toilet paper

[Salad Tosser]

No matter what there is always that ever present pungency that is a delight to some.

[MultiTroll]

Anyone of you splatterers tried psylium husk?
Metamucil or similar?

[FuzzyLumpkins]

http://www.businessinsider.com/review-dollar-shave-clubs-one-wipe-charlie-butt-wipes-2013-6

[cantthinkofanything]

anyone use, Shittens?

https://www.getshittens.com/

http://www.incrediblethings.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/02/shittens-mittens-toilet-paper.jpg

[Tom,Dick&Harry]

Stop once all is clear.

[InRareForm]

just used a whole roll... smh

[Spur|n|Austin]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vGCIGEUB32M

But seriously, if you're not using these or an equivelant - your asshole is probably disgusting

http://g-ecx.images-amazon.com/images/G/01/aplus/detail-page/B00I3MV4KC_5lg.jpg

Would you go pick up a piece of shit or dip your hand in diarrhea, then only use some TP to wipe it off? We've got bidet's in our toilets at work, and I'm seriously considering buying one off Amazon and installing it here at the crib. It's a bit of a surprising feeling at first, but now it's one of the nicest parts of my day.

[Pauly D]

I went to wet wipes for a while and it didn't make a fucking difference. I had to wipe as much as with regular and with regular I still go till I don't see anything so I don't get it. Also, when I shower I make sure to get good down there

[Spur|n|Austin]

I went to wet wipes for a while and it didn't make a fucking difference. I had to wipe as much as with regular and with regular I still go till I don't see anything so I don't get it. Also, when I shower I make sure to get good down there

Well you don't ONLY wipe with the wet ones, you start with reggie TP, then finish with the wets.

[Pauly D]

Well you don't ONLY wipe with the wet ones, you start with reggie TP, then finish with the wets.

I think in Cahoots with Big Toiletry. They've lined your pockets

[InRareForm]

Also, when I shower I make sure to get good down there

This is critical

[DMC]

More faggotry, dudes asshole shopping on ST just days after the decision.

[Bobby Junk]

More faggotry, dudes asshole shopping on ST just days after the decision.

Lebron opting out of the last year of his contract?

[lefty]

Wipe then hot water

[Thread]

Using a damp tp as your finisher does a good job on sending you on your way.


Yep, then a length of Bounty folded over until it make a nice square (2 x 2), dampen it, make sure the design side is out & shove it in tight against the hole. The tightness of your buns hold it in place. If not, it'll fall out and perhaps a couple days later you'll come across it in your travels: house, store, driveway. Then it's so gd flat it's like roadkill.

[tlongII]

Gotta have a Toto!

http://reviewbidets.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/02/neorest600_function2.jpg

[2pac > Kobe]

i feel like we've had this discussion before, i think i learned the damp toilet paper tactic here tbh would recommend to friends and family

[Jacob1983]

Not enough.

[HI-FI]

Horses for courses. If I'm fortunate to have an efficient shit then I don't need a lot. Usually I go overboard though. Good to see I'm not the only one OCD about it. Growing up I never understood how people can be cool with shit streaks.

[Jacob1983]

I strain way too much. I miss having a shower that had a sprayer on it. I saved a ton of toilet paper with that thing. I would just take a shit and then hop in the shower and wash my shit off down the drain. Good times.

[G.Q.]

I haven't worn a white pair of skivvies in decades. Just in case.

[Franklin]

Guess how many rolls of paper this bitch needs after...

http://i.imgur.com/RMACK6E.gif

[FuzzyLumpkins]

That looks more like chocolate frosting than shit.

Anyway if I have to wipe more than twice its shower time. Anything more than that and you ain't getting it all and that is unacceptable to walk around with shit particulates hanging around.

[Millennial_Messiah]

2 wipes + wipe with water + shower is ideal, tbh

[Millennial_Messiah]

+1

[SpursforSix]

This is easy peasy. I wipe 'til there's no brown.

And as a sidenote...the better you eat, the easier the poops come out and require less wiping.

If I've been on a binge, whether it be alcohol or crappy food (usually a combination), it takes a lot more wipes to get to the "clean point". And even then, I can usually force the tp up a bit and find more brown.

Believe it...if you're eating right, it should only take one wipe (and maybe a second as confirmation) that you took care of business.

[Millennial_Messiah]

This is easy peasy. I wipe 'til there's no brown.

And as a sidenote...the better you eat, the easier the poops come out and require less wiping.

If I've been on a binge, whether it be alcohol or crappy food (usually a combination), it takes a lot more wipes to get to the "clean point". And even then, I can usually force the tp up a bit and find more brown.

Believe it...if you're eating right, it should only take one wipe (and maybe a second as confirmation) that you took care of business.
I agree with all of that. Even when I'm on a long streak of "eating right" (i.e. salads, balanced meals and lots of fiber) though I'll do a third small wipe with some warmish water on the TP and force the TP up into the inner part of my anus to make sure no poop got up in the rims. Sometimes over-wiping gives me hemorrhoids, though. That's why a couple wipes and a shower is ideal.

[Spurminator]

Got one of these. I still wipe a couple times first though. Then finish it off with a good spray.

https://cdn.shopify.com/s/files/1/0881/2654/t/319/assets/og-image.jpg?v=16522769173277577416

[SpursforSix]

Got one of these. I still wipe a couple times first though. Then finish it off with a good spray.

https://cdn.shopify.com/s/files/1/0881/2654/t/319/assets/og-image.jpg?v=16522769173277577416

No fucking way. Some drunk goes into my bathroom not knowing what it is and turns the knob and leaves it on.

And again...that's just telling someone..."hey it's OK to poop in here". I don't care how messy someone's ass is. That's their problem.
I just don't need your anal vapors wafting around my house.

[Chucho]

This is easy peasy. I wipe 'til there's no brown.

And as a sidenote...the better you eat, the easier the poops come out and require less wiping.

If I've been on a binge, whether it be alcohol or crappy food (usually a combination), it takes a lot more wipes to get to the "clean point". And even then, I can usually force the tp up a bit and find more brown.

Believe it...if you're eating right, it should only take one wipe (and maybe a second as confirmation) that you took care of business.

I dunno, but the mother-in-law was a charge nurse back in her day and said that consistent pooping is a good sign of not worrying about colon cancer and other bunghole-related illness.

[Millennial_Messiah]

I dunno, but the mother-in-law was a charge nurse back in her day and said that consistent pooping is a good sign of not worrying about colon cancer and other bunghole-related illness.

Correct. Chronic constipation, alcohol abuse, and smoking (very often some combination of those three) account for over 99% of colon cancer cases. The first can be mitigated by simply eating more vegetables, especially the green and fibrous ones... (contrary to popular belief, red meat doesn't cause colon cancer, but red meat plus the absence of healthy vegetables [e.g. potatoes don't count] can cause constipation and lead to colon cancer). The other thing is that unhealthy carcinogenic stuff like eating meat way overcooked and burnt potatoes and burnt food in general. All of that causes constipation and irritable bowel problems which lead to GI tract illness, from heartburn in the esophagus to rectal issues.

Eat a balanced diet... meat is fine, but eat plenty of vegetables... supplement with vitamins C and D if you can... eat a dark, leafy salad at least every other day... avoid consuming large amounts of eggs and dairy aside from naturally fermented yogurt... Eat under 1500 calories a day; lower your % calorie intake of simple sugar and starch to below 15%... don't smoke, drink sparingly. The keys to living to over 100.

[SpursforSix]

I dunno, but the mother-in-law was a charge nurse back in her day and said that consistent pooping is a good sign of not worrying about colon cancer and other bunghole-related illness.

I'm not sure what you mean by "consistent". I know that when I'm eating healthy and exercising, I normally have a clean poop every morning (one wipe with a second confirmation). And I don't need to poop until the next morning.
The stools themselves are not hard or painful to evacuate. Nor are they so loose and mushy that I feel like it's a mess down there.

I'll add that drinking enough water is key.

[Millennial_Messiah]

I'm not sure what you mean by "consistent". I know that when I'm eating healthy and exercising, I normally have a clean poop every morning (one wipe with a second confirmation). And I don't need to poop until the next morning.
The stools themselves are not hard or painful to evacuate. Nor are they so loose and mushy that I feel like it's a mess down there.

I'll add that drinking enough water is key.
100% agree. Tea and diluted soft beverages including sports drinks are OK, provided the sugar (or fake sugar) intake isn't insane. Coffee should be limited to 8-12oz max per day and only in the mornings because sleep cycle is important for overall long term health and longevity. Milk and cream should be avoided as a beverage, except for that occasional time you're eating, say, Chinese food and you accidentally bit down on the wrong pepper chunk.

[Millennial_Messiah]

One poop a morning is my usual regimen when I'm eating right as well. Usually about an hour or two of work, about a quart of watery drink, then a nice poop and a couple wipes and immediately thereafter, a shower. :tu

[Millennial_Messiah]

Healthy Calorie intake breakdown:

-should be between 500 and 1500 per day
-40% of calories = mono-unsaturated fat (i.e. olives, olive oil, you get quite a bit of this in meats and most veggies etc
-10% of calories = poly-unsaturated fat (try to maintain as close to 50-50 balance of omega-3 vs. omega-6; buy canola oil and NOT vegetable oil)
-5% of calories = saturated fat, but avoid trans fat (some stearic acid, found in meats, is not unhealthy)
-20% of calories = proteins
-20% of calories = complex carbs, from veggies, whole grains et al. (i.e. limit simple sugar and amylopectin starch from white foods like white bread, rice, pasta, white crackers and potatoes)
-5% of calories = bad stuff (simple sugar, starch, trans fat, etc)
-Fiber: doesn't count as calories, but you should strive for at least 15 grams per day if possible

[Spurminator]

No fucking way. Some drunk goes into my bathroom not knowing what it is and turns the knob and leaves it on.

And again...that's just telling someone..."hey it's OK to poop in here". I don't care how messy someone's ass is. That's their problem.
I just don't need your anal vapors wafting around my house.

Of course, I'd never put one in a guest bathroom. I don't poop in those either. This is strictly for the master bath.

[FkLA]

Healthy Calorie intake breakdown:

-should be between 500 and 1500 per day
-40% of calories = mono-unsaturated fat (i.e. olives, olive oil, you get quite a bit of this in meats and most veggies etc
-10% of calories = poly-unsaturated fat (try to maintain as close to 50-50 balance of omega-3 vs. omega-6; buy canola oil and NOT vegetable oil)
-5% of calories = saturated fat, but avoid trans fat (some stearic acid, found in meats, is not unhealthy)
-20% of calories = proteins
-20% of calories = complex carbs, from veggies, whole grains et al. (i.e. limit simple sugar and amylopectin starch from white foods like white bread, rice, pasta, white crackers and potatoes)
-5% of calories = bad stuff (simple sugar, starch, trans fat, etc)
-Fiber: doesn't count as calories, but you should strive for at least 15 grams per day if possible

lol 500-1500 calories per day

Are you a manlet?

p.s. start the week 16 thread already, I need fantasy advice again tbh

[Millennial_Messiah]

lol 500-1500 calories per day

Are you a manlet?

p.s. start the week 16 thread already, I need fantasy advice again tbh
oh shit, it's wednesday already :lol

[SpursforSix]

100% agree. Tea and diluted soft beverages including sports drinks are OK, provided the sugar (or fake sugar) intake isn't insane. Coffee should be limited to 8-12oz max per day and only in the mornings because sleep cycle is important for overall long term health and longevity. Milk and cream should be avoided as a beverage, except for that occasional time you're eating, say, Chinese food and you accidentally bit down on the wrong pepper chunk.

I'm not a big coffee drinker but there's been recently studies pointing to 4 cups of coffee being beneficial to warding off dementia. (I think it's 4 cups).

[Millennial_Messiah]

I'm not a big coffee drinker but there's been recently studies pointing to 4 cups of coffee being beneficial to warding off dementia. (I think it's 4 cups).
I would drink 1 cup a day in the morning along with my daily morning excedrin pill but anything more gives me that awful daytime crash coma feeling.

[Millennial_Messiah]

lol 500-1500 calories per day

Are you a manlet?


yeah, 5'8" and around 130-135 pounds depending on when I late ate/pooped.

But my wife is tall, dark and beautiful so it doesn't matter. She's like 6' and 180 and only a little over a month post-partum.

https://i.imgur.com/SDtGrLN.jpg

[Millennial_Messiah]

If we ever have a son together I'm gonna make him into the next Mahomes, except he won't throw picks because he'd be my kid

[Capt Bringdown]

https://images-na.ssl-images-amazon.com/images/I/612N0%2B609kL._SL1000_.jpg

[Millennial_Messiah]

https://images-na.ssl-images-amazon.com/images/I/612N0%2B609kL._SL1000_.jpg

Hand held? I bet you get poopy water all over the toilet, toilet seat and carpet. :lol

[lefty20]

3-5 times then I just jump in the shower. My bowel movements always occur an hour or so before bed time and I never go to bed without having taken a recent shower, so it works out perfectly.

On the odd occasion where traveling/stomach issues fuck up my timing I'll just keep wiping till the tp stays white.

[SpursforSix]

3-5 times then I just jump in the shower. My bowel movements always occur an hour or so before bed time and I never go to bed without having taken a recent shower, so it works out perfectly.

On the odd occasion where traveling/stomach issues fuck up my timing I'll just keep wiping till the tp stays white.

LOL...what? That's wasteful as fuck.

If you're literally going from the toilet to the shower, that should be a two wipe maximum. If I feel I've had a clean poop, I've even gone with zero wipes.

[lefty20]

LOL...what? That's wasteful as fuck.

If you're literally going from the toilet to the shower, that should be a two wipe maximum. If I feel I've had a clean poop, I've even gone with zero wipes.

Idk m8, just feels wrong to not wipe at least 3 times.

[Millennial_Messiah]

LOL...what? That's wasteful as fuck.

If you're literally going from the toilet to the shower, that should be a two wipe maximum. If I feel I've had a clean poop, I've even gone with zero wipes.
Zero wipes and a shower or zero wipes and undies back on?

[Millennial_Messiah]

Idk m8, just feels wrong to not wipe at least 3 times.
First wipe gets the motherload
Second wipe gets most that remains
Third wipe (ideally, wet) scours it

I won't put my pants back on until I've either used a wipe with soap (i.e. for public restrooms) or showered with a heavy focus on shower head to anus (at home). I just won't.

[Millennial_Messiah]

also, who the fuck showers at night? ya must be a baldy :lol

[Millennial_Messiah]

+1.

[SpursforSix]

Zero wipes and a shower or zero wipes and undies back on?

Zero wipes and straight from toilet to shower. Underwear stays on floor.

[Millennial_Messiah]

Zero wipes and straight from toilet to shower. Underwear stays on floor.

The floor? Wtf? You don't put it somewhere decent like on a table or other platform? Even the top of the tank of the toilet is better than the floor.

[chunticakes]

I'm telling you guys just use ass wipes. I wipe both ways until my butthole is clean enough for Jay's mom to eat out of.

[Millennial_Messiah]

I'm telling you guys just use ass wipes. I wipe both ways until my butthole is clean enough for Jay's mom to eat out of.
If I have to buy them, nah, too unnecessarily expensive

[tlongII]

https://splashesonline.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/04/washlet2.jpg

Only way to go.

[Millennial_Messiah]

https://splashesonline.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/04/washlet2.jpg

Only way to go.

But what happens when you poop on that nozzle? That sounds disgusting tbh.

[phxspurfan]

twice or three times, 4 squares each. Sometimes with a courtesy flush in the middle.

Not counting the dreaded forever wipe situation. Which always happens when youre late for something ofc

[SpursforSix]

The floor? Wtf? You don't put it somewhere decent like on a table or other platform? Even the top of the tank of the toilet is better than the floor.

Put my underwear on a table???? Who the fuck does that.
When I'm done with my shower, I grab my dirty clothes and take them to the washroom.

[SpursforSix]

twice or three times, 4 squares each. Sometimes with a courtesy flush in the middle.

Not counting the dreaded forever wipe situation. Which always happens when youre late for something ofc

Mother fucking this. And you know as soon as your done pooping that it's gonna be that.

[Millennial_Messiah]

Put my underwear on a table???? Who the fuck does that.
When I'm done with my shower, I grab my dirty clothes and take them to the washroom.

I make sure to do thorough pee wiping such that I don't need to change underwear for about a week.

[phxspurfan]

tVA1i26SkKE

[leemajors]

https://splashesonline.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/04/washlet2.jpg

Only way to go.

:tu had one for 4 years now

[InRareForm]

I usually take a shower now right after. I can't stand poop being there when walking.. But if I can't I, still do do 4 or 5 wipes