Worst first date experiences

[InRareForm]

She showed up with a raging cough, sneezing, probably had a terrible cold/flu.

She looked 25 pounds heavier than her online picture.

Date ended in about 20 minutes after I told her you should go home get some rest lol. I had to pay for the half drank margaritas.

[cantthinkofanything]

blind date set up by my ex girlfriend. said she had a friend that had a lot in common with me.

I was nervous so was drunk well before the date started. We met at some dive over in Dallas with cool live music. Date seemed OK looking, tall, athletic build. Long hair. Had similar tastes in music. My ex and her date bailed so it was just me and
this chick. Had a few beers and then started doing shots which was always my downfall. Didn't matter how drunk I was, I had to end the night with rounds of straight tequila.

I guess the bar food didn't agree with me because when we started to leave, I just had a giant diarrhea attack in the bar. I got to the bathroom quick but it was already all though my underwear and leaked onto my jeans. Cleaned up as much as I good with the new goal just saying good night and getting to the car.

We got outside and she asked if everything was OK and not to be embarrassed and she invited over to her place. Normally, I would have just called it all off and never want to see her again no matter how hot. But I was super drunk and I guess at that point thought she was cool or what did I have to lose or whatever.

Got to her place and walked in the door and there was like 5 or 6 naked people, most girls, in her living room doing orgy stuff and also peeing and shitting on each other and on this big plastic tarp spread across the floor. At that point, I started to back out but she grabbed my hand and pulled me in. That kind of stuff totally disgusts me but I guess at that point, I was so drunk that I was willing to find out what the big deal was.

As I got into the room and the people started to become clearer, I realized that they all had dicks. Some were trannies with nice boobs and some were just dudes. But everyone in the room had a penis. I looked at my date who someone did a Superman strip and was standing their naked. Yep...she was a he. I'm not into that at all but I guess I was so drunk that nothing was making any sense. And he had nice breasts and long hair.

At some point I passed out. I woke to the sound of someone pounding on the door. I was the only one left in the room. All covered in dried shit. Then the door busts down and it's the police. They threw me down on the ground and then tore up the room looking for something. I started vomiting all over the place. They left after 20 minutes or so. I felt like shit. I was naked, covered in vomit and shit and my ass was bleeding.

My clothes were gone. So I had to put on one of the dresses and call a cab to take me back to my car. On the way home, I ran over a biker and got arrested for DUI.

[The Reckoning]

girl told me she had an abortion after getting knocked up by the exiled prince of jordan.

[Avante]

Never had a bad first date or other than.."you're married???"..a bad time with any female. I am very very picky.

[The Gemini Method]

I thought your first date was with a fine denizen of the Philippine Islands?

[cantthinkofanything]

Never had a bad first date or other than.."you're married???"..a bad time with any female. I am very very picky.

http://attackthestacks.files.wordpress.com/2012/04/chris-hansen.jpg

[Avante]

I thought your first date was with a fine denizen of the Philippine Islands?

That's because you're stupid. So I never went to the prom? So by 19 I'd never had a date? You really this dumb?

[The Gemini Method]

That's because you're stupid. So I never went to the prom? So by 19 I'd never had a date? You really this dumb? Calm down Chester.

[Blake]

....and call a cab to take me back to my car. On the way home, I ran over a biker and got arrested for DUI.

I fell for your story up until this point. Your car keys would have been with your clothes.

[lebomb]

I met a blind date at a Chilis off of 1604. The girl was mixed.....looked like hispanic and black. She was like a 5.875 out of a 10, so not all that but doable. Well as soon as she grabbed the menu, I saw her busted up fingernails. It looked like she had her fingernails as a appetizer before she left the house to roll into Chilis. I mean the girls nails were eaten up to the quick. They were shredded and bleeding. As she was having a drink, she would occasionally stop to munch on her fingertips and nails. This shit really freaked and grossed me out. By the time we ordered, I had completely lost my appetite. All I could think about was this damn cannibal sitting in front of me. When our food arrived, (not that she could be hungry at this point) I played it off like I got free Spurs tickets on my cellphone. I kindly told ol girl that I had to leave and she could take my food in a doggie bag to munch on later, after her fingers of course. She seemed kinda stunned, but took it in stride and accepted. Thank god I had an out, the Spurs were actually playing that night.

[benefactor]

Does waking up beside a chick that you had to sneak away from count? That's really the only thing I had that I would consider a bad date. I didn't really do a lot of "dating" tbh. It was more like meeting up with someone who you either met at the club or met through mutual friends and fucking a few times. Most of the time it was understood by both parties that's as far as it was going.

The person you meet through a mutual friend is the best. Lots of times you don't see them for a while then they happen to show up at a club or a party you are at and you have someone you can fuck without having to put any work into it.

[Blake]

Does waking up beside a chick that you had to sneak away from count? That's really the only thing I had that I would consider a bad date. I didn't really do a lot of "dating" tbh. It was more like meeting up with someone who you either met at the club or met through mutual friends and fucking a few times. Most of the time it was understood by both parties that's as far as it was going.

The person you meet through a mutual friend is the best. Lots of times you don't see them for a while then they happen to show up at a club or a party you are at and you have someone you can fuck without having to put any work into it.

Exactly that.

And the waking up next to naked sprawling passed out beer google chick where you try to sneak out was the worst.

[cantthinkofanything]

I fell for your story up until this point. Your car keys would have been with your clothes.

yeah...that's right. except when I used to have a car with the keypad, I'd always leave my keys locked inside. So...that's probably what happened.

[Avante]

Calm down Chester.

Why act retarded little fella?

[cantthinkofanything]

Why act retarded little fella?

He means like in "Chester the Molester".

[mojorizen7]

:lol

[mojorizen7]

blind date set up by my ex girlfriend. said she had a friend that had a lot in common with me.

I was nervous so was drunk well before the date started. We met at some dive over in Dallas with cool live music. Date seemed OK looking, tall, athletic build. Long hair. Had similar tastes in music. My ex and her date bailed so it was just me and
this chick. Had a few beers and then started doing shots which was always my downfall. Didn't matter how drunk I was, I had to end the night with rounds of straight tequila.

I guess the bar food didn't agree with me because when we started to leave, I just had a giant diarrhea attack in the bar. I got to the bathroom quick but it was already all though my underwear and leaked onto my jeans. Cleaned up as much as I good with the new goal just saying good night and getting to the car.

We got outside and she asked if everything was OK and not to be embarrassed and she invited over to her place. Normally, I would have just called it all off and never want to see her again no matter how hot. But I was super drunk and I guess at that point thought she was cool or what did I have to lose or whatever.

Got to her place and walked in the door and there was like 5 or 6 naked people, most girls, in her living room doing orgy stuff and also peeing and shitting on each other and on this big plastic tarp spread across the floor. At that point, I started to back out but she grabbed my hand and pulled me in. That kind of stuff totally disgusts me but I guess at that point, I was so drunk that I was willing to find out what the big deal was.

As I got into the room and the people started to become clearer, I realized that they all had dicks. Some were trannies with nice boobs and some were just dudes. But everyone in the room had a penis. I looked at my date who someone did a Superman strip and was standing their naked. Yep...she was a he. I'm not into that at all but I guess I was so drunk that nothing was making any sense. And he had nice breasts and long hair.

At some point I passed out. I woke to the sound of someone pounding on the door. I was the only one left in the room. All covered in dried shit. Then the door busts down and it's the police. They threw me down on the ground and then tore up the room looking for something. I started vomiting all over the place. They left after 20 minutes or so. I felt like shit. I was naked, covered in vomit and shit and my ass was bleeding.

My clothes were gone. So I had to put on one of the dresses and call a cab to take me back to my car. On the way home, I ran over a biker and got arrested for DUI.

:married:

[Franklin]

I met a blind date at a Chilis off of 1604. The girl was mixed.....looked like hispanic and black. She was like a 5.875 out of a 10, so not all that but doable. Well as soon as she grabbed the menu, I saw her busted up fingernails. It looked like she had her fingernails as a appetizer before she left the house to roll into Chilis. I mean the girls nails were eaten up to the quick. They were shredded and bleeding. As she was having a drink, she would occasionally stop to munch on her fingertips and nails. This shit really freaked and grossed me out. By the time we ordered, I had completely lost my appetite. All I could think about was this damn cannibal sitting in front of me. When our food arrived, (not that she could be hungry at this point) I played it off like I got free Spurs tickets on my cellphone. I kindly told ol girl that I had to leave and she could take my food in a doggie bag to munch on later, after her fingers of course. She seemed kinda stunned, but took it in stride and accepted. Thank god I had an out, the Spurs were actually playing that night.
Bitch is Lebron's sister maybe, the Great Satan Lebron has the same habit (munching on his own fingertips and nails).

[Franklin]

It's another fake story by CTOA imho, dude never feels bored of polluting the site with his gross fake stories and topics, and most times his topics are related to shit, literal shit. But let us pretend it was true for a minute... it was a date set up by your ex, so it's really no surprise that it turned out to be a bad date imho.

[PizzaFace]

First date?

[Thebesteva]

She showed up with a raging cough, sneezing, probably had a terrible cold/flu.

She looked 25 pounds heavier than her online picture.

Date ended in about 20 minutes after I told her you should go home get some rest lol. I had to pay for the half drank margaritas.

:lol I genuinely laughed reading this. What kind of whack ass bitch shows up to a date sick?

[Koolaid_Man]

I have a few....

1. She showed up to my condo....i had a stomach virus *aka* diarrhea....i was trying to hurry....I heard a door bell buzz followed by a knock..I'm spraying Febreeze all over the restroom....I'm still feeling like shit....now I'm spraying febereeze as I head to the front door..i yell through the door to give me a minute but then I run back to the rest room....she's probably freaking out by now...I finish up but I'm very uncomfortable I need to shower....I go back to the front door and tell her I'm sick and we need to postpone of course she didnt believe me and thought I was with another bitch...

[Koolaid_Man]

2nd...this the chic is the reason I dont like James Harden....but thats another story altogether....she's a hot blond we went on our first date after endless flirting back and forth....so its a high end high dollar restaurant.....She met me there at the bar....after 5 min chit chat we head over to our table....things started out cool but then some strage shit happened that made me think she snorts cocaine....we're sitting there when all of a sudden snot starts to slowly trickle from her nose....no big deal because she's gonna wipe it right? Hell no she didnt. I started to turn away as it dripped down her nose touched her lip and then onto her plate....this snot was moving at a snails pace and I said to myself I know this bitch feels that shit....it was very uncomfortable...i finally handed her a napkin and she was like ohh...

I hung around long enough to fuck her a few times and that was it..she was sort a lame fuck...not very good in bed....

[Koolaid_Man]

Took this chic out dusky brunette...,to a high end restaurant...she was one of the prettier girls in my stable...we get to the spot and people are rude by nature so they stare how dare she be with this black man....anyway....they sit us in between an older grey head but sophisticated looking black man and his wife and in between a white couple...Im thinking ohh great couldnt they have found us a more private spot....anyway this chic is married and was about to leave her husband...so as were eating the convo quickly turn to sex...and apparently she gets a bit louder with each drink....she coming on to me and the black couple next to us at least the black lady looked disgusted at the fact I was with her...the other white couple was actually being nosey and listening in....when all of a sudden she starts talking about her husbsnd saying: "Kool I dont know whats wrong with him because I can suck a mean dick."

She was so loud all I could do was fall out laughing...the black lady next to us about grabbed her husband to leave...as I was laughing my ass off....the dude seemed like he was enjoying our conversation....and the white couple on the other side surely was...but after I stopped laughing I said ok ok we'll have to see...and the white couple sitting on the other side of us started grinning from ear to ear...it was a fun date...

Me and this chic still sex buddies to this day...and yes she can suck the black off a dick :lol

[lebomb]

Took this chic out dusky brunette...,to a high end restaurant...she was one of the prettier girls in my stable...we get to the spot and people are rude by nature so they stare how dare she be with this black man....anyway....they sit us in between an older grey head but sophisticated looking black man and his wife and in between a white couple...Im thinking ohh great couldnt they have found us a more private spot....anyway this chic is married and was about to leave her husband...so as were eating the convo quickly turn to sex...and apparently she gets a bit louder with each drink....she coming on to me and the black couple next to us at least the black lady looked disgusted at the fact I was with her...the other white couple was actually being nosey and listening in....when all of a sudden she starts talking about her husbsnd saying: "Kool I dont know whats wrong with him because I can suck a mean dick."

She was so loud all I could do was fall out laughing...the black lady next to us about grabbed her husband to leave...as I was laughing my ass off....the dude seemed like he was enjoying our conversation....and the white couple on the other side surely was...but after I stopped laughing I said ok ok we'll have to see...and the white couple sitting on the other side of us started grinning from ear to ear...it was a fun date...

Me and this chic still sex buddies to this day...and yes she can suck the black off a dick :lol


Kool tha homewrecka!!!! Black Cock Down!!!! :lmao

[Brazil]

A long time ago when I was senior manager for PwC, I invited a cute trainee for a dinner after almost three days working night and day on a due diligence. That was a kinda thank you dinner for having worked her ass off to help me deal with the sorting of a bunch of archives.

She was young, big boobs, nice ass... good stuff tbh

What was supposed to happen happened, walking down the street along Seine river, I kissed her. From there she was on my appartment naked on my bed. I do enjoy licking some pussy for getting stuff rolling, I went there slowly but surely when I started to smell something weird a mix of dead cat and rotten fish... girl had a smelly pussy :depressed

Nasty tbh, I lost my erection almost immediately. I did not want to hurt her feelings so I went on the road of "you know I just broke up it's kinda hard etc..." she told don't worry babe and started sucking my dick, I forgot about the smelly pussy and went in her mouth... I never replied to her phone calls after

[Koolaid_Man]

I simply wont do it...i almost threw up on a bitchs pussy once....

Another time this bitch knew she was on her period and didnt care if I ate her bloody snatch....i didnt eat it at all but when i pulled out there was blood all over the condom and sheets....i was like fucking bitch she knew and wasnt gonna say shit if I ate it...some dudes like eating bloody pussy but not me...i know a mexican dude who eats his girl bloody pussy with tater tots..he calls it salty ketchup...

[Franklin]

A long time ago when I was senior manager for PwC, I invited a cute trainee for a dinner after almost three days working night and day on a due diligence. That was a kinda thank you dinner for having worked her ass off to help me deal with the sorting of a bunch of archives.

She was young, big boobs, nice ass... good stuff tbh

What was supposed to happen happened, walking down the street along Seine river, I kissed her. From there she was on my appartment naked on my bed. I do enjoy licking some pussy for getting stuff rolling, I went there slowly but surely when I started to smell something weird a mix of dead cat and rotten fish... girl had a smelly pussy :depressed

Nasty tbh, I lost my erection almost immediately. I did not want to hurt her feelings so I went on the road of "you know I just broke up it's kinda hard etc..." she told don't worry babe and started sucking my dick, I forgot about the smelly pussy and went in her mouth... I never replied to her phone calls after

How did you know the smell of dead cat if you have never been to china?

Seriously though, she had been working her ass off for the past a few days and supposedly she hadn't had the time for a shower or something, so it was really not her fault to have a smelly pussy. Any bitch would've smelt the same without washing her pussy in several days tbh.

And now I know more about the life at PwC, good riddance, indeed I kinda dodged a bullet thanks to my strict self discipline. :toast

[TDMVPDPOY]

Nasty tbh, I lost my erection almost immediately. I did not want to hurt her feelings so I went on the road of "you know I just broke up it's kinda hard etc..." she told don't worry babe and started sucking my dick, I forgot about the smelly pussy and went in her mouth... I never replied to her phone calls after

smelly pussy or bad breath? which do you prefer?...

[benefactor]

A long time ago when I was senior manager for PwC, I invited a cute trainee for a dinner after almost three days working night and day on a due diligence. That was a kinda thank you dinner for having worked her ass off to help me deal with the sorting of a bunch of archives.

She was young, big boobs, nice ass... good stuff tbh

What was supposed to happen happened, walking down the street along Seine river, I kissed her. From there she was on my appartment naked on my bed. I do enjoy licking some pussy for getting stuff rolling, I went there slowly but surely when I started to smell something weird a mix of dead cat and rotten fish... girl had a smelly pussy :depressed

Nasty tbh, I lost my erection almost immediately. I did not want to hurt her feelings so I went on the road of "you know I just broke up it's kinda hard etc..." she told don't worry babe and started sucking my dick, I forgot about the smelly pussy and went in her mouth... I never replied to her phone calls after
Nice save tbh. :tu

[Brazil]

How did you know the smell of dead cat if you have never been to china?

Seriously though, she had been working her ass off for the past a few days and supposedly she hadn't had the time for a shower or something, so it was really not her fault to have a smelly pussy. Any bitch would've smelt the same without washing her pussy in several days tbh.

And now I know more about the life at PwC, good riddance, indeed I kinda dodged a bullet thanks to my strict self discipline. :toast

We did not go directly to the dinner, we left the office around 6 / 7 pm and we met at the restaurant after 9 IIRC so she had time to shower tbh... that was not a "bad day" kinda smell tbh... plus she was a fountain girl, you put a finger and it's already a water fall... surely not her fault, probably nobody have had the courage to tell her.

Other than she is cute and smart but that was a deal breaker

[Brazil]

smelly pussy or bad breath? which do you prefer?...

:lol both are pretty bad but if I had to choose I'll go with the bad breath and focus on the pussy and avoid the kissing

[Brazil]

Nice save tbh. :tu

:lol yup

good girl

[Trill Clinton]

I met a blind date at a Chilis off of 1604. The girl was mixed.....looked like hispanic and black. She was like a 5.875 out of a 10, so not all that but doable. Well as soon as she grabbed the menu, I saw her busted up fingernails. It looked like she had her fingernails as a appetizer before she left the house to roll into Chilis. I mean the girls nails were eaten up to the quick. They were shredded and bleeding. As she was having a drink, she would occasionally stop to munch on her fingertips and nails. This shit really freaked and grossed me out. By the time we ordered, I had completely lost my appetite. All I could think about was this damn cannibal sitting in front of me. When our food arrived, (not that she could be hungry at this point) I played it off like I got free Spurs tickets on my cellphone. I kindly told ol girl that I had to leave and she could take my food in a doggie bag to munch on later, after her fingers of course. She seemed kinda stunned, but took it in stride and accepted. Thank god I had an out, the Spurs were actually playing that night.

http://i60.tinypic.com/245mqhf.gif

[Trill Clinton]

Took this chic out dusky brunette...,to a high end restaurant...she was one of the prettier girls in my stable...we get to the spot and people are rude by nature so they stare how dare she be with this black man....anyway....they sit us in between an older grey head but sophisticated looking black man and his wife and in between a white couple...Im thinking ohh great couldnt they have found us a more private spot....anyway this chic is married and was about to leave her husband...so as were eating the convo quickly turn to sex...and apparently she gets a bit louder with each drink....she coming on to me and the black couple next to us at least the black lady looked disgusted at the fact I was with her...the other white couple was actually being nosey and listening in....when all of a sudden she starts talking about her husbsnd saying: "Kool I dont know whats wrong with him because I can suck a mean dick."

She was so loud all I could do was fall out laughing...the black lady next to us about grabbed her husband to leave...as I was laughing my ass off....the dude seemed like he was enjoying our conversation....and the white couple on the other side surely was...but after I stopped laughing I said ok ok we'll have to see...and the white couple sitting on the other side of us started grinning from ear to ear...it was a fun date...

Me and this chic still sex buddies to this day...and yes she can suck the black off a dick :lol

:lol

[CitizenDwayne]

One time I went out with a girl and she didn't put out.

That would probably me my worst first date experience

[spurraider21]

i'm starting to legitimately feel bad for kool tbh :lol... his wild imagination teases him on the daily

[Infinite_limit]

I got AIDs

[Brazil]

I got AIDs

that would explain a lot

[TheRunningMan]

I've had to run out on of a few first dates when the experience was just simply unbearable.