I Cant Stand

[batman2883]

1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time.... I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?



2. People who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire room for the T.V. remote because they refuse to walk to the T.V. and change the channel manually.



3. When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". Damn right! What good is cake if you can't eat it?



4. When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they? Gonna Kick their asses!



5. When people say while watching a film "did you see that?". No Loser, I paid $12 to come to the cinema and stare at the damn floor.



6. People who ask "Can I ask you a question?".... Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?



7. When something is 'new and improved!'. Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it, couldn't be new.



8. When people say "life is short". What the hell?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!! What can you do that's longer?



9. When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus come yet?" . If the bus came would I be standing here, dumbass?

[angel_luv]

... people who take things so literally



Hahahaha! J/K

= )

[usckk]

I can't stand girls with arm-pit hair.

[Gatita]

I can't stand worthless threads..... :rolleyes

[samikeyp]

with stolen material. :p

[Gatita]

with stolen material. :p

:lol BUSTED!!!

Batman, are you really named Carlos Mencia?? :lol

[Solid D]

... people who take things so literally



Hahahaha! J/K

= )

Boo yeah! :smokin

I tolerate but don't understand why...upon being asked how something is progressing, that person says "I'm working on it as we speak" (which really isn't true because they are talking to me, not working on it).

[Cant_Be_Faded]

I can't stand girls with arm-pit hair.


this girl in one of my classes has armpit hair that is about 2 inches long

its nasty!

[midgetonadonkey]

this girl in one of my classes has armpit hair that is about 2 inches long

its nasty!

I used to work to with a chick from Africa named Mbong and she had a shitload of chest hair. I found that very strange.

[Kori Ellis]

Back in the day when I used to be part of corporate America, I used to share an office with a woman who didn't shave her armpits or legs. She'd wear pantyhose and all her long leg hair would be smashed up against her hose and her legs looked so nasty :vomit

I lobbied to switch offices and be with the chainsmoker instead :lmao

[TheTruth]

I can't grow armpit hair.
It's weird.

[ALVAREZ6]

Batman, I don't get how you can't stand these things....none are a big deal.

[Gatita]

Batman, I don't get how you can't stand these things....none are a big deal.


stolen material

[2Blonde]

The too much hair on girls is gross, but something I don't get is the no hair look on guys. That grosses me out. My daughter and all her little teenager friends love the guys with no hair on their legs or chest. They guys who shave or wax their legs are sexy. I always thought they were just gay. :lol But apparently it's just the new trend. It's not just for swimmers and bikers anymore. They don't even like armpit hair on guys. :rolleyes Whatever.

[Mixability]

with stolen material. :p

I thought I had heard these before... cmon batman, at least mix up the order to throw us off! :lol

[Shelly]

Back in the day when I used to be part of corporate America, I used to share an office with a woman who didn't shave her armpits or legs. She'd wear pantyhose and all her long leg hair would be smashed up against her hose and her legs looked so nasty :vomit

I lobbied to switch offices and be with the chainsmoker instead :lmao

I remember going to a CompUSA in San Bruno and the chick that worked in Customer Service had a beard. Nothing like Grizzly Adams, but very noticeable.

[Shelly]

I thought I had heard these before... cmon batman, at least mix up the order to throw us off! :lol

It's an email forward!

[Cant_Be_Faded]

The too much hair on girls is gross, but something I don't get is the no hair look on guys. That grosses me out. My daughter and all her little teenager friends love the guys with no hair on their legs or chest. They guys who shave or wax their legs are sexy. I always thought they were just gay. :lol But apparently it's just the new trend. It's not just for swimmers and bikers anymore. They don't even like armpit hair on guys. :rolleyes Whatever.


Well except for the guys that have naturally no chest hair, this trend is called Metrosexuality.

It's all the rage amongst upper middle and upper class high school girls.

[Mixability]

It's an email forward!

maybe that should have been in the original post? :shootme

[2Blonde]

I remember going to a CompUSA in San Bruno and the chick that worked in Customer Service had a beard. Nothing like Grizzly Adams, but very noticeable.
It's always kind of creepy when you try to talk to a woman with a 5 o'clock shadow. :lmao

[Marklar MM]

Metrosexuality is defined very graphically in the epically popular tv show, South Park.

[Cant_Be_Faded]

Metrosexuality is defined very graphically in the epically popular tv show, South Park.


They did it to the extreme though.

Technically, guys who spend more than 30 minutes getting ready or preparing themselves are Metro.
Here's a transcript from an email I received a while back from one of my friends who is Metro:




In the morning if my face is a little puffy I'll put on an ice pack while doing stomach crunches. I can do 1000 now. After I remove the ice pack I use a deep pore cleanser lotion. In the shower I use a water activated gel cleanser, then a honey almond body scrub, and on the face an exfoliating gel scrub. Then I apply an herb-mint facial mask which I leave on for 10 minutes while I prepare the rest of my routine. I always use an after shave lotion with little or no alcohol, because alcohol dries your face out and makes you look older. Then moisturizer, then an anti-aging eye balm followed by a final moisturizing protective lotion.

[Gatita]

It's all the rage amongst upper middle and upper class high school girls.

Keeping in mind that they are not middle or upper class....their parents are.

[mookie2001]

yeah just like there is no such thing as a poor kid

their parents are

[2Blonde]

Keeping in mind that they are not middle or upper class....their parents are.
Great point !!!!!!

[Gatita]

yeah just like there is no such thing as a poor kid
their parents are

Nah! Your a broke muthafucka till you get a job. :lol

[Cant_Be_Faded]

the parents need to have money to supply the boys with all those metrosexual products, such as almond-skin balm and mint-leaf gel scrub

[mookie2001]

sorry I must disagree


if youre a kid who lives in a gated community
big ass house
gets driven to school in an H2
an Ipod
a laptop
wireless blog
a trashcompactor
a boiling hot water faucet
has $180 shoes
and Ambercrombie prefrayed everything
goes skiiing

youre rich
whether you have a dime to your name or not

[Marklar MM]

I cant stand this movie...

http://imdb.com/title/tt0100079/

[mookie2001]

if you live in El Torreon Apartment complex, share a room with 2 brother
have never left town
wears white tshirts everyday
laughs when he hears the word
"ski"
"ipod"
or "ambercrombie"
and has 90 Cents in a shoebox, 800% more than a dime

youre poor

[Cant_Be_Faded]

sorry I must disagree


if youre a kid who lives in a gated community
big ass house
gets driven to school in an H2
an Ipod
a laptop
wireless blog
a trashcompactor
a boiling hot water faucet
has $180 shoes
and Ambercrombie prefrayed everything
goes skiiing

youre rich
whether you have a dime to your name or not

Don't forget if they have an upstairs AND a downstairs bar.

[Mixability]

sorry I must disagree


if youre a kid who lives in a gated community
big ass house
gets driven to school in an H2
an Ipod
a laptop
wireless blog
a trashcompactor
a boiling hot water faucet
has $180 shoes
and Ambercrombie prefrayed everything
goes skiiing

youre rich
whether you have a dime to your name or not

:tu

i absolutely hate all that pre-frayed crap, but i guess when you're rich, you can pay for everything to be done for you, even "breaking in" your clothes! :lol

[mookie2001]

I have three bars
upstairs
downstairs

and sea level

[Cant_Be_Faded]

:tu

i absolutely hate all that pre-frayed crap, but i guess when you're rich, you can pay for everything to be done for you, even "breaking in" your clothes! :lol


LOL
That's a quotable quote.
A publishable observation.

[Gatita]

Stop whining! Your grown ups now, while legally anyhow. If you had the money you would have the same damn things!

[mookie2001]

yeah

i'm just jealous of those boiling hot water faucets


those are BAD!

[NZHayden]

i cant stand...
my phone ringing, when i go to pick it up they hang up, so i have to call them back.

[Mixability]

Stop whining! Your grown ups now, while legally anyhow. If you had the money you would have the same damn things!

Ipod? no thanks
Skiing? no thanks, Mexicans don't belong in snow, we're like cats in water!
Abercrombie? :vomit
$180 shoes? I'll stick to my $60 DC's unless they were an unopened pair of Jordan XI's! :lol

[Cant_Be_Faded]

Does anyone in this forum
have an extra faucet
at their sink, that when activated,
instantly provides you with 100 degree
boiling hot water?

[Shelly]

i cant stand...
my phone ringing, when i go to pick it up they hang up, so i have to call them back.

That's the beauty of caller ID!

[2Blonde]

Does anyone in this forum
have an extra faucet
at their sink, that when activated,
instantly provides you with 100 degree
boiling hot water?
My sister does. It's pretty cool.

[Gatita]

Ipod? no thanks
Skiing? no thanks, Mexicans don't belong in snow, we're like cats in water!
Abercrombie? :vomit
$180 shoes? I'll stick to my $60 DC's unless they were an unopened pair of Jordan XI's! :lol

*sniff, sniff* I smell bullshit. :lol

J/K

[mookie2001]

Skiing? no thanks, Mexicans don't belong in snow
got that right when it snowed in Victoria, CBF and I got together to compare exploded chodes

[mookie2001]

no fucking way that waters 100 degrees

its gotta be closer to 200

[Mixability]

*sniff, sniff* I smell bullshit. :lol

J/K

seriously, you like Abercrombie?

[Cant_Be_Faded]

I had never seen snow before. At least not the kind that falls from the sky.

I made a very compact snowball and nailed my cousin in the crotch.

[Cant_Be_Faded]

no fucking way that waters 100 degrees

its gotta be closer to 200


I was going to say 120, my mental picture is saying 120 or 180.

But then i thought, if its that hot, wouldn't it all be steam?

That just means those things are that bad ass, to deliver enough water so that its not all evaporated yet

[2Blonde]

no fucking way that waters 100 degrees

its gotta be closer to 200
Oh, I don't know the temperature... I just meant that she has one of those faucets at her sink that gives you hot boiling water for coffee, teas, soups, whatever....

[mookie2001]

LOL

you know somebody on ST has one too



elpimpo did until last month
I would call him and he'd be playing with it

[2Blonde]

We're building a new house but I decided I could still microwave a cup of water for tea. I didn't want to spend an extra 200-300 for that.

[Gatita]

seriously, you like Abercrombie?

No, but I do love me some Ralph Lauren. :tu

[Gatita]

Oh, I don't know the temperature... I just meant that she has one of those faucets at her sink that gives you hot boiling water for coffee, teas, soups, whatever....

Water boils at a 100 degrees.

[mookie2001]

not it doesnt

its 100 for like three straight months!

100c

[CosmicCowboy]

Water boils at a 100 degrees.


:lmao

I don't think these kids comprende celsius.

[Clandestino]

Ipod? no thanks
Skiing? no thanks, Mexicans don't belong in snow, we're like cats in water!
Abercrombie? :vomit
$180 shoes? I'll stick to my $60 DC's unless they were an unopened pair of Jordan XI's! :lol

i was talking to some general once when i was in the army.. he was doing his walk-thru of our section where they bs with the soldiers type thing.. anyway, he asked me.. so, you been skiing lately(i was stationed near the bavarian alps). and i was like, "mexicans don't ski!" he busted out laughing.. all his little assistants were all scared at first...they couldn't believe i told the general that..

[Gatita]

:lmao

I don't think these kids comprende celsius.

I hope you weren't insinuating me. Would you like it in Kelvin as well?! :lol

[bigzak25]

i can't stand quitters, haters, and malcontents.


i hate those muthafukkas....but i'm trying real hard to stop...i'm just so pissed off about it...


:angel


armpit hair on a woman?

how hot is she otherwise?

if your gonna buy condoms, shavers are just an aisle down...:tu :p

[Spam]

Cantstandya!

[ZStomp]

http://www.funnyjunk.com/pages/annoy.htm


People who point at their wrist while asking for the time. I know where my watch is buddy, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the bathroom is?

People who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire room for the TV remote because they refuse to walk to the TV and change the channel manually.

When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". Screw off. What good is a goddamn cake if you can't eat it? What, should I eat someone else's cake instead?

When people say "It's always in the last place you look". Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they?


When people say, while watching a movie "Did you see that?" No dicknose, I paid $9.00 to come to the theatre and stare at the frigging ceiling up there. What did you come here for?

When something is "new and improved", which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it.

When a cop pulls you over and then asks if you know how fast you were going? You should know *******, you frigging pulled me over.

When people say "Life is short." What the hell?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!! What? Are they going to do something that's longer?

When people ask "Can I BORROW a piece of paper?" Sure, but please don't return the favor! It's one god damn piece of paper!

When you are waiting for the bus and someone ask you "Did the bus come yet?" If the bus came I would not be standing here a-hole!

People who ask "Can I ask you a question?" Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya buddy?


I'll give credit where credit is due. ;)

[Mr Dio]

Nah! Your a broke muthafucka till you get a job. :lol

Oh my GOSH!
The mouth on you Gatita!













I just PM'd you my cell #.

[Mr Dio]

The too much hair on girls is gross, but something I don't get is the no hair look on guys. That grosses me out. My daughter and all her little teenager friends love the guys with no hair on their legs or chest. They guys who shave or wax their legs are sexy. I always thought they were just gay. :lol But apparently it's just the new trend. It's not just for swimmers and bikers anymore. They don't even like armpit hair on guys. :rolleyes Whatever.


When did the Bandidos, Hells Angels or Outlaws wax?????

[Gatita]

Oh my GOSH!
The mouth on you Gatita!













I just PM'd you my cell #.

I am sending my neighbor's dog over (I would send my own, but he is too good for you). Remember, just do what you did last time. Have the jar of peanut butter handy. :tu

[Gatita]

When did the Bandidos, Hells Angels or Outlaws wax?????

Don't you remember? The brazilian wax?!

[Mr Dio]

I am sending my neighbor's dog over (I would send my own, but he is too good for you). Remember, just do what you did last time. Have the jar of peanut butter handy. :tu


I have the extra crunchy this time because the honey was too easy to get off.
Hey G, I done did your dog & it is now my bitch.

[Gatita]

I have the extra crunchy this time because the honey was too easy to get off.
Hey G, I done did your dog & it is now my bitch.

Really, that explains why he said that his asshole has never felt tighter.

[Mr Dio]

He was tight, once. :lol
He & I have many things in common including our fave position.

[Gatita]

He was tight, once. :lol
He & I have many things in common including our fave position.

You like it in the ass too?! :lol

[MannyIsGod]

:lmao @ so many things in this thread.

Ah, funny funny.

[Mr Dio]

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^hey baby!

[bigzak25]

now now girls....:lol

[Mr Dio]

You like it in the ass too?! :lol


You don't remember?

[Mr Dio]

now now girls....:lol


Heeeyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!

[1Parker1]

:lmao........I have that bad habit of always asking........"Can I ask you a question?" as a way of jump-starting a conversation I am un-sure about or is serious or something...

[slayermin]

In the morning if my face is a little puffy I'll put on an ice pack while doing stomach crunches. I can do 1000 now. After I remove the ice pack I use a deep pore cleanser lotion. In the shower I use a water activated gel cleanser, then a honey almond body scrub, and on the face an exfoliating gel scrub. Then I apply an herb-mint facial mask which I leave on for 10 minutes while I prepare the rest of my routine. I always use an after shave lotion with little or no alcohol, because alcohol dries your face out and makes you look older. Then moisturizer, then an anti-aging eye balm followed by a final moisturizing protective lotion.

That's from the movie "American Psycho." Christian Bale played the metrosexual, Wallstreet serial killer. Isn't funny that the American Psycho became Batman which I finally saw last night. It was incredible. Christopher Nolan is one helluva director.

[Gatita]

You don't remember?

Yeah, my strap on is still full of your shit!

:lmao

[Mr Dio]

Yeah, my strap on is still full of your shit!

:lmao


You mean it was full of shit.
You lick dildo almost as good as you do the real thing! :lol

[Gatita]

You mean it was full of shit.
You lick dildo almost as good as you do the real thing! :lol

Psst! So do you according to Paki.

[Mr Dio]

You got that right, don't hate.....congratulate!

[ALVAREZ6]

http://www.funnyjunk.com/pages/annoy.htm


People who point at their wrist while asking for the time. I know where my watch is buddy, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the bathroom is?

People who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire room for the TV remote because they refuse to walk to the TV and change the channel manually.

When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". Screw off. What good is a goddamn cake if you can't eat it? What, should I eat someone else's cake instead?

When people say "It's always in the last place you look". Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they?


When people say, while watching a movie "Did you see that?" No dicknose, I paid $9.00 to come to the theatre and stare at the frigging ceiling up there. What did you come here for?

When something is "new and improved", which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it.

When a cop pulls you over and then asks if you know how fast you were going? You should know *******, you frigging pulled me over.

When people say "Life is short." What the hell?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!! What? Are they going to do something that's longer?

When people ask "Can I BORROW a piece of paper?" Sure, but please don't return the favor! It's one god damn piece of paper!

When you are waiting for the bus and someone ask you "Did the bus come yet?" If the bus came I would not be standing here a-hole!

People who ask "Can I ask you a question?" Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya buddy?


I'll give credit where credit is due. ;)
:lmao :owned :owned :owned


Nice work Z Stomp!!

[Cant_Be_Faded]

That's from the movie "American Psycho." Christian Bale played the metrosexual, Wallstreet serial killer. Isn't funny that the American Psycho became Batman which I finally saw last night. It was incredible. Christopher Nolan is one helluva director.


LOL, well I'm glad someone besides mookie got that joke.

Mookie can almost repeat that movie verbatim. My girlfriend gave me the first edition book for my birthday. The actual book version of that monologue is like 5 times longer. The entire 2nd chapter is called "morning" and is one big chapter-long paragraph describing his morning routine.

It owns!!!!!

[batman2883]

its not stolen material its a fowarded email

[Mixability]

its not stolen material its a fowarded email

sorry, i didn't read that in your original post :rolleyes

[Horry For 3!]

1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time.... I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?
Nope
2. People who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire room for the T.V. remote because they refuse to walk to the T.V. and change the channel manually.
Yes, why get up everytime to change the channel when you can just sit there and change it easily from your chair
3. When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". Damn right! What good is cake if you can't eat it?
Nope
4. When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they? Gonna Kick their asses!
Many people say this :lol
5. When people say while watching a film "did you see that?". No Loser, I paid $12 to come to the cinema and stare at the damn floor.
Check
6. People who ask "Can I ask you a question?".... Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?
Check
7. When something is 'new and improved!'. Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it, couldn't be new.
:lmao
8. When people say "life is short". What the hell?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!! What can you do that's longer?
I have no idea
9. When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus come yet?" . If the bus came would I be standing here, dumbass?
:lmao good one

[Gatita]

its not stolen material its a fowarded email

And it only took you 4 pages later to respond. :lol

[batman2883]

i dont post after 5 pm sorry