Spurs #2 in most off beat NBA rankings ever.

[Rummpd]

Pistons
Has anyone else noticed this team is comprised of nice role players who've joined forces to form Roletron, the most underrated weapon in the galaxy?
2 Spurs
Let me try to put how good this team really is in perspective for you. You ready? Bruce Bowen starts. You think about that.
If case you haven't had a chance to witness it, here's how Maggette gets his points: Clipps get the defensive rebound and outlet to a streaking Maggette and he either dunks it, lays it in or goes to the line? It's unfair. It's like the slant pattern to Cap Boso on Tecmo Bowl.
5 Warriors
If I had to guess, I'd say Baron and J-Rich have the highest combined vertical of any backcourt in the world.
6 Pacers
Brad Miller sure would be a good fit on this team. That's all I'm gonna say…
7 Mavs
Who'd you take in a Black Man Blaming contest, Dirk Nowitzki, Susan Smith or the Republican Party?
8 Cavs
They lost the first two games of a three game western swing. That's the true sign of a bullshit contender.
9 Heat
When Shaq missed games as a Laker, Kobe led the team to more wins than Wade has in Shaq absence. Now, if y'all wanna sit there and be mad at the facts, that's your damn business.
10 Suns
Shit. Steve Nash good. Let's just move on before I compliment his cracker ass…
11 T-Wolves
That organization ain't big enough for two Kevins. One has to go.
12 Bucks
*Trades TJ Ford and puts Maurice Williams on fantasy team*
13. Bulls
It's a cute little story and all, but they need a big man. Enough already. Tyson Chandler is a woman.
14 Nuggets
Best center in the NBA?
15 Hornets
I betcha Chris Paul could beat Hurricane Katrina in a fight. That's how good he is.

15 Hornets
I betcha Chris Paul could beat Hurricane Katrina in a fight. That's how good he is.
16 76ers
Iverson is having an historic season…for nothing.
17 Wizards
Etan's offense is as bad as his poetry.
18 Kings
Brad Miller sure can play some basketball. Only a fool would trade him…for Scott Pollard.
19 Magic
Prediction: Dwight Howard will finish his career as the NBA's all-time leading rebounder.
20 Nets
Kidd's heart isn't in it. Too bad, he's the only good player on that team with one.
21 Celtics
Paul Pierce is as sure to be traded as Celtic fans are sure to remain Nazis.
22 Lakers
Kobe takes a lotta shots and they lose. Kobe passes the ball and they lose. Kobe Bryant remains a three-time champion and his haters lose.
23 Sonics
Sure, maybe they should be ranked ahead of the Lakers, but Kobe has rings and Ray Allen doesn't.
24 Jazz
AK-47 needs to spend less time trying to block every damn shot that goes up and more time trying to put up his own shot. Knowing his dumb ass, he'd probably try to block his own shot.
25 Knicks
To have such a great coach, they sure lose a lot of close games.
26 Blazers
Why'd Nate McMillan leave Seattle? Seriously. These young boys love to lose.
27 Bobcats
The only thing Brevin Knight's great play is succeeding in doing is keeping Felton on the bench, because it damn sure ain't leading to wins.
28 Rockets
How do you say, "This shit ain't all my fault. Y'all muhfuckas must be crazy. My back is fine. I can't speak for some people. I ain't even gonna say no names, but y'all niggas know who the fuck I'm talking about" in Chinese?
29 Raptors
Sometimes I think Morris Peterson and Mateen Cleaves just call each other every night and laugh for a half an hour. No talking, just laughing. Oh, wait, I just got news that Charlie Bell is in the league. That's gotta be the funniest 3-way call in history.
29 Hawks
In 5 years, more people will choose Marvin Williams over Chris Paul…to grab something off the top shelf in the fucking supermarket. Billy Knight is a stupid Civil Rights bush havin' muhfucka. Damn! If he drafted as carefully as he applied that texturizer to his damn bush, the Hawks would be in business




(not that I agree with that above comment re Bruce, but some of these are a riot.)

Source:
http://fiyastarter.com/fs-pages/fs-sports-nbarank05-4.htm

[Tobias]

Let me try to put how good this team really is in perspective for you. You ready? Bruce Bowen starts. You think about that.
What's that supposed to mean? :pctoss

[Rummpd]

i asked the same damm thing and replied to the author that 90% of the teams in the league would benefit from him starting on their teams over current over-hyped one way players.

This guy is also a major Kobe lover, not that I do not admire most of his game, but enough is enough (recognize it is not without fault).

[Solid D]

Sometimes, a lack of insight can just soooo get in the way.

[Rummpd]

agreed.

[Horry For 3!]

Bowen is the best defender in the league and isn't he 2nd in the league in 3pt%?

[sprrs]

7 Mavs
Who'd you take in a Black Man Blaming contest, Dirk Nowitzki, Susan Smith or the Republican Party?


That made me chuckle, otherwise the article was stupid, uninformed, and biased

[ambchang]

i wish Pop could be as insightful as the author of the article and trade Bowen for some overhyped young forward who plays no defense, so that we can watch Rip Hamilton, Chauncey Billups, Ray Allen, Carmelo Anthony and QRich rip the Spurs in the playoffs.
And it is cute how the Warriors are ranked number 5 because their backcourt has the highest vertical leap in the league.

[gospursgojas]

I think he was trying to say that even with Bowen who is not in there to score, we are still winning.

[Tek_XX]

I still don't get it.

[The Artest Factor]

i asked the same damm thing and replied to the author that 90% of the teams in the league would benefit from him starting on their teams over current over-hyped one way players.

This guy is also a major Kobe lover, not that I do not admire most of his game, but enough is enough (recognize it is not without fault).
Uhhh, buddy....Bruce Bowen is the ultimate 1-dimensional player. The guys every bit as bad offensively as Ben Wallace. He's also a crap rebounder and passer.

[Rummpd]

neither do I but the guy puts it out there.

[101A]

I think he means this:

"No other team in the league has the luxury of having one of their swing players be completely dependent on other people creating his shot for him."

It's not a slam on the Spurs, or even Bruce - it just is. Most teams NEED more points from the 3 spot than Bruce is capable of delivering - because they ain't gonna get it from anywhere else.

[Extra Stout]

Thanks to the internets, people who are barely literate can get "published" and have others link to them. That is what those rankings tell me.

[Useruser666]

This is so Stuart Scott. :lol

Stuart Scott Caught Hiding In Broom Closet Practicing Ebonics

http://www.thebrushback.com/Archives/stuartscott_full.htm

BRISTOL, CT--In a rather embarrassing situation for the hip young ESPN anchor, Stuart Scott was caught hiding in a broom closet, apparently practicing ebonics for his nightly Sportscenter taping. Scott was discovered by a janitor, who had walked into the closet to get a new mop head.

“I just needed a new mop head, so I went into the supply closet, and there’s Stuart Scott, sitting on a little stool with headphones on,” said the janitor, Lee Stenson. “He didn’t hear me come in, so he just sat there and kept talking in this urban street slang. I think he was getting it from the headphones.”

Despite the accusations, Scott denies that he was listening to hardcore gangster rap in order to pick up on the latest urban slang and improve his “street cred”.

“Nah, it wasn’t like that,” said an embarrassed Scott. “I just like to go chill sometimes in the broom closet, kick back and listen to some Method Man or Jay Z or something. You know, its all quiet in there and shit, and it helps a brother get some rest. Y’all don’t know how much pressure we be under doin this shit, dog.”

According to Stenson, when Scott noticed that he was watching he attempted to cover himself by picking up the newspaper and pretending to read it.

CO-workers at ESPN were not surprised by Scott's actions. According to sources, many of Scott’s acquaintances are suspicious of his hip urban slang, pointing out that it varies drastically from his natural conversational tone. He seems to be able to “turn it on and off,”say CO-workers.

“That’s definitely an affectation of sorts,” said Dan Patrick, ESPN anchor. “When he first started working here, he spoke the king’s English. Then all of a sudden, he started saying things like ‘boo-yea’ during broadcasts. Then he started referring to everyone as ‘dog,’ and it just sort of snowballed from there.”

Indeed, in tapes of Scott’s early broadcasts, the sportscaster displays a style that is completely unlike his current manner of speaking. An excerpt from his first telecast:

“Greetings, ladies and gents and welcome to Sportscenter. Today the Boston Red Sox defeated the New York Yankees in a superlative match featuring as many twists and turns as a Dostoevsky novel. Alas, the Boston Red Sox emerged victorious on the wings of Clemens’ masterful and exquisite performance, which made one hearken back to the days of old Cy Young himself.”

Scott defended himself by saying that his style evolved naturally over the years, and that his natural transformation in tone and attitude should not be interpreted as a calculated image change.

“Dog, I just got a little hipper, that’s all. You printin this? Good. Make sure you put ‘dog.’”

When viewing Scott’s later work, the difference is obvious. An excerpt from last night’s broadcast: “Dog, da Braves be knockin da cover of the ball! Here comes my boy Chipper. Boo yea! That’s outta here, dog! Next inning, the 3-2 pitch from Gonzalez…boo yea! Sheffield’s in the hizzz-ouse!”

Many of his friends are confused with Scott’s attempts to sound more ‘urban.’ They say he should be happy who he is, and not try to use a hip slang to attempt to identify with a group of people he has nothing in common with.

“Look,” said one associate anonymously. “He went to University Of North Carolina and got a bachelor’s degree in speech communication. He grew up in a middle class neighborhood. He’s no ODB, that’s for sure. He’s more like Ted Koppel.”

[pache100]

Sometimes, a lack of insight can just soooo get in the way.

But, most of the time, it's just plain stupidity.


Bowen is the best defender in the league and isn't he 2nd in the league in 3pt%?

Yes.

[mikejones99]

Bruce bowen can score when he needs to. He should be an all star this year. He is a great 3pt shooter and of course the best defender. Go Spurs. This is the best roster ever assembled. PLease do not trade anyone.

[Samr]

I think this would be really funny to send to all your buds in your fantasy league. And then have them collectively rail your ass for being blindly ignorant to the realities of the league.

He's funny. And so are the Three Stooges. But everyone laughs if you flaten a guy's face with a frying pan and say "nigga!"

[mavsfan1000]

I laugh at whenever someone says that Bruce Bowen doesn't score enough points. His role isn't meant to be scoring alot. He starts because he can lock down other defenders and hit the open 3. Parker, Ginobili, and Duncan are the playmakers.