"Keep your problems to yourself. Your moms not being a bitch today, don't ruin that." [Archive]

SpursWoman

12-12-2005, 10:37 PM

You obviously haven't heard me at the drop off at my kids' schools.

:lmao

I was at the grocery store with my daughter and she was seriously acting up ... I had asked her to help me unload the stuff so she started throwing it onto the conveyer thingy, half of the stuff landing on the other side by the cashier. After about 5 times of very nicely (ie. quietly, between clenched teeth) to stop it, I told her a little too loudly to knock it the hell off or I'd beat her ass in front of God and everyone.

So she stomps off, and I hear this weird lady run after her ... "Oh, it's okay sweetheart...it wasn't your fault..."

WTF? :lol

It happens...anyone who tells you differently either has the patience of Mother Theresa or is lying like a mofo. :lol

Chris & I took 4 kids to the grocery store one time...and even he had to remove himself from the situation before he unloaded, and he does have the patience of Mother Theresa. :wow :lol

Zombie

12-12-2005, 10:42 PM

What happened to the day where you would see a kid getting his ass whooped in the grocery store?
Good times, Good times. :smokin

SpursWoman

12-12-2005, 10:49 PM

I'll let you know the next time we go.... :lol :lol

Chris

12-12-2005, 11:03 PM

BRING BACK CORPORAL PUNISHMENT! Spare the rod and spoil the child.

SpursWoman

12-12-2005, 11:06 PM

My children are spoiled...that's why I have to use the rod. :fro

Shelly

12-12-2005, 11:07 PM

:lol

Going to the grocery store with your kids is pure HELL! If I take one of them, they're fine. But the both of them together is excruciating. Why is the grocery store the place they decide to punch each other?

And if you bought a bag of smashed chips, I apologize. You have my 10 year old to thank.

Duff McCartney

12-12-2005, 11:20 PM

Kids can be twats when they go to the any store.

But even kids pale in comparison to adults that throw fits at stores.

Trooper 2112

12-12-2005, 11:24 PM

And if you bought a bag of smashed chips, I apologize. You have my 10 year old to thank.
:lol

1369

12-12-2005, 11:27 PM

that's why I have to use the rod. :fro

You're gonna wear that boy out SW.

spurs=bling

12-12-2005, 11:37 PM

:lmao

I was at the grocery store with my daughter and she was seriously acting up ... I had asked her to help me unload the stuff so she started throwing it onto the conveyer thingy, half of the stuff landing on the other side by the cashier. After about 5 times of very nicely (ie. quietly, between clenched teeth) to stop it, I told her a little too loudly to knock it the hell off or I'd beat her ass in front of God and everyone.

So she stomps off, and I hear this weird lady run after her ... "Oh, it's okay sweetheart...it wasn't your fault..."

WTF? :lol

It happens...anyone who tells you differently either has the patience of Mother Theresa or is lying like a mofo. :lol

Chris & I took 4 kids to the grocery store one time...and even he had to remove himself from the situation before he unloaded, and he does have the patience of Mother Theresa. :wow :lol
:lmao

pseudofan

12-13-2005, 12:28 AM

Kids can be twats when they go to the any store.

Okay, paid up or not..... you're a shit hole for calling kids twats :rolleyes

T Park

12-13-2005, 12:31 AM

What do you expect.

Class A Shitface.

Not suprising.

Kids 10 years from now are gonna show how fucked up their hippie parents were.

1369

12-13-2005, 12:33 AM

TPark, do yourself a favor and pick up one of Nigella Lawson's cookbooks, your girl won't be disappointed.

Jekka

12-13-2005, 01:03 AM

A couple of Quotes of the Day have come from my dad, like:

Mom: I tried to talk to you at 3 this morning.
Dad: Yeah, I usually ignore you then.
Mom: But your hand moved...
Dad: Was it making a gesture?

Now there is a relationship example to follow, that's some awesome parenting.

In all seriousness though, they love each other (we think), but they are pretty ridiculous sometimes. They kept me and my sister too petrified of embarassing them in public that we were usually pretty quiet when we went out, at least until my sister reached her teenage years and my mother told her she was dressing like a "sexpot" and let her go out anyways.

Jekka

12-13-2005, 01:04 AM

TPark, do yourself a favor and pick up one of Nigella Lawson's cookbooks, your girl won't be disappointed.

:tu The Domestic Goddess is a good one, now that's comfort food.

T Park

12-13-2005, 01:27 AM

do yourself a favor and pick up one of Nigella Lawson's cookbooks, your girl won't be disappointed.

lol

Did my relationship thread jump over to here??

I dont know if there will be a second date or not.

Its up in the air right now.

T Park

12-13-2005, 01:30 AM

In all seriousness though, they love each other (we think), but they are pretty ridiculous sometimes. They kept me and my sister too petrified of embarassing them in public that we were usually pretty quiet when we went out

My parents did the same.

I was so petrified of them and what would happen back at home, i just sat and wasn't heard.

I constantly heard the saying

"Little boys are to be seen and not heard."

Didn't want to push that theory what so ever.

Trainwreck2100

12-13-2005, 01:35 AM

Okay, paid up or not..... you're a shit hole for calling kids twats :rolleyes

Twats was kinda strong, how about little bastards high on sugar. (bastards ain't a stretch in this day and age either.) I just hate how parents leave their kids at the toy/video game store, so they can go out shopping, leaving the tv/clerks as a free babysitter. When I worked at the movies these parents had their kid see some kids movie while they went to see Blade II, he had to wait an hour in the lobby by himself for them to get out. Some parents need classes so they ain't so shitty.

Lesson 1
If your kid talks back slap him/her across the face.

David Bowie

12-13-2005, 01:57 AM

In fourth grade, I guess this girl who was a year above me got suspended or something. And they called her mom to come into the school. ANd the mom came into the school with some sort of a strap , ad started ebating her daughter really hard. There was a lot of screaming and yelling and the teachers had to restran the moher , I guess.

Mixability

12-13-2005, 02:03 AM

I once saw what had to be a 9 year old in a stroller with a pacifier! WTF!?!?! :wtf

It's not the childs fault for that, but cmon, when you're a parent and you get as many "dirty looks" as that lady did that day, you think you'd get the hint!

kris

12-13-2005, 02:37 AM

I was in line picking up dinner today and I heard a dad telling that to his 11 year old daughter in line. That's super parenting there.

Share ridiculous parenting stories here.

That was by far the funniest thing I have ever read on this forum. Kori nice encore as well.

I think it should be ok for kids to get old fashion spankings - not beatings, but just legitimate spankings. I really don't like how that spankings became code for child abuse. In the store is a different story, that's just embarrassing all the way around.

I think kids need some threat of a fearful punishment to keep them in line. I was never fearful of timeouts, but if I heard the word licks, that was all I needed to hear.

CosmicCowboy

12-13-2005, 09:59 AM

What do you expect.

Class A Shitface.

Not suprising.

Kids 10 years from now are gonna show how fucked up their hippie parents were.

Don't you just love it when single adults with no children have such strong opinions on our parenting skills?

Mijo

12-13-2005, 10:09 AM

Don't you just love it when single adults with no children have such strong opinions on our parenting skills?
No shit. It's easy to sit back and watch it going on and comment on the wacked out parenting skills. It's a whole different situation after you've spawned a few of 'em and they collectively pick a moment to act up in public.

MannyIsGod

12-13-2005, 10:12 AM

When I have some, I'm going to shackle them and keep them downstairs where they can shovel coal into a furnace for fun.

travis2

12-13-2005, 10:13 AM

I've been tempted at times...:lol

CharlieMac

12-13-2005, 10:28 AM

No shit. It's easy to sit back and watch it going on and comment on the wacked out parenting skills. It's a whole different situation after you've spawned a few of 'em and they collectively pick a moment to act up in public.

Although, I'm betting it's pretty easy to not tell your kid that his/her mother is a bitch and to keep their problems to themselves. That's just me I bet.

SpursWoman

12-13-2005, 10:36 AM

In the store is a different story, that's just embarrassing all the way around.

I prefer to just not take them. But if I want to have groceries in the house, sometimes I have no choice. And it's not because they are bad, unruly kids ... but sometimes they have crappy days, too...and I think having all of that cool *stuff* around them is just too overwhelming and they haven't quite got that self-control thing down very well yet. :lol

Don't you just love it when single adults with no children have such strong opinions on our parenting skills?

If childless people aren't criticising parents having to resort to some kind of discipline in public, they are critcising how badly the kids are behaving and the parent's apathy about it. Toddlers can get nasty and throw the worst temper tantrums imaginable, but pre-adolescents have the distinct ability to push even the most calm person right over the edge. In my experience, kids that never act up from time to time are the exception, not the rule. And I don't think it's all necessarily the parent's lack of discipline, but the kids individual personality...my daughter is the epitome of "Type A". Even when she was little and I even said the words "time out", she'd just laugh at me.

:fro

Someone I know says *they* never acted up in public either....maybe it's an only child thing?

desflood

12-13-2005, 10:54 AM

I have been known to scream "Touch that and die!" at my kid(s) from all the way down the aisle in the grocery store.

MosesGuthrie

12-13-2005, 10:58 AM

Don't you just love it when single adults with no children have such strong opinions on our parenting skills?

I don't need to be a parent to know that when a kid is in Walmart and yells at his mother "you need to buy me some candy!" that the kid is rude..or (in the same store on the same day) a kid was running through the boys clothes section and taking clothes off the racks and throwing them to the floor...while mom just giggled and thought it was soooo cute. Then again...the parents are just as to blame because they allow and give into the behavior.

samikeyp

12-13-2005, 11:02 AM

no shit.

I do agree with Cosmic to a point. A child might be crying because they are not feeling well and the parent may have had no choice to bring them out into public. I also don't agree with when people say something to a parent for punishing their child. I do think that there are somethings that kids do that even non-parents know is bad. And while I rarely agree with Duff...he is right...Adults can be even worse.

easjer

12-13-2005, 11:06 AM

I'll agree it is very difficult for people who don't have kids to know how hard it is to control kids in an environment like a store, in public, where the kids know they can get away with more because there is an audience, and there is way more temptation around them. I don't have kids, but I've taken young children to the store before and it's hell (worse when they think you are a teen mother).

But it's still pretty obvious when there are problems with parenting: parents ignoring their kids beating the crap out of each other, parents laughing at expressly wrong behavior (opening boxes of food, throwing products on the ground, demanding toys or candy), parents screaming (not warning them - red in the face, spit flying, cursing and threatening) at their kids.

But adults throwing temper tantrums are the worst. . .

SpursWoman

12-13-2005, 11:09 AM

while mom just giggled and thought it was soooo cute. Then again...the parents are just as to blame because they allow and give into the behavior.

I don't see that nearly as much as I see parents looking like they are about to pop a blood vessel from trying to control their rage...but are too worried about all the righteous busy-bodies calling CPS on them.

I told my daughter if she wanted to call CPS on me she'd better be ready for the shit-storm...because if I'm going to jail, it's going to be for a very good reason....and there will definitely be enough evidence to convict me. :)

Mijo

12-13-2005, 11:11 AM

Although, I'm betting it's pretty easy to not tell your kid that his/her mother is a bitch and to keep their problems to themselves. That's just me I bet. Fair enough. Sorry, I wasn't meaning to single you out.

samikeyp

12-13-2005, 11:12 AM

:lol I can see you doing that too, SW!

I agree with you about the "busy-bodies"....hey, you gave birth you that child...you have the God-given right to pop that child on the butt!

easjer

12-13-2005, 11:21 AM

Oh, as for the original question: The worst thing I ever saw was a girl from the class above me when I was in high school. She had her baby when I was in eigth grade, so she was 14? Anyway, I saw her when I was 16, so she was 17 and her daughter was 3-ish. It was Christmas time and we were all shopping. I saw her with her daughter in the cart, and they were with her father (the grandfather of the 3 year old). The 3 year old started whining for some toy or other, which the mother then gave her. The grandfather took it away, saying that she could not have it, she had not behaved herself and didn't get a treat. The child started crying, but the mother was the worst. She threw a screaming, crying temper tantrum because her father wouldn't buy her daughter the toy. By the end, even the child was staring in wonder. It was the biggest trainwreck I've ever seen (so uncomfortable to witness, but couldn't stop watching).

SpursWoman

12-13-2005, 11:51 AM

Fair enough. Sorry, I wasn't meaning to single you out.

Me, neither ... that would definitely have turned my head, too. .

But I can't be that judgemental...I'm sure some terrible things have slipped out over the last 10 years or so that I regret saying. I just have to take comfort in the fact that there were an infinite number of terrible things I could have said but managed to refrain. Times I could have (and wanted to) just beat the living hell out of them, but didn't. I guess I'm a lost cause and have pretty much given up on the fact that I'll never be as perfect a human being as so many others apparently (or un-parently ? ) are. :spin

Ed Helicopter Jones

12-13-2005, 12:08 PM

My son likes to eat as we shop so it's all good. He's usually satisfied to sit in the seat on the shopping cart as long as he's allowed to sample the merchandise. It's pretty funny at the checkout, though, as I hand the cashier open boxes of cereal, open milk containers, open bags of pretzels, open bags of cheese, etc., the list goes on. The first time he tried Frosted Flakes I had to literally pry the box from his white-nuckled kung-fu grip so the cashier could scan the box! :lol Chopper Jr. loves him some grub!!

I'm not opposed to parents getting after their kids in a store. Discipline is a good thing. What I don't like is when I see a parent slap a child upside the head for acting up when the little one is no more than three or four years old. My guess is that stuff like that does more harm than good. There's a right and a wrong way to discipline.

Guru of Nothing

12-13-2005, 12:09 PM

I don't beat, spank or scream. I just give'em a look, nod my head and say "okay." ... It seems to stir a fear of the unknown inside them.

Ed Helicopter Jones

12-13-2005, 12:17 PM

When I have some, I'm going to shackle them and keep them downstairs where they can shovel coal into a furnace for fun.

You must have bought my new book "Parenting Made Easy -- How to turn your children into financial assets". That's right out of chapter three: "Saving Money On Energy Costs". Look for it on Amazon.com.

CosmicCowboy

12-13-2005, 12:45 PM

We never physically punished the kids and they both turned out fine...

Most of the posts in here refer to the little ones. Just wait till they are teenagers...:lol

My wife and I had diametrically opposite ways of dealing with the kids and this may have helped...I was always the cool/calm/collected one and gave detailed explanations of what was acceptable, what wasn't acceptable, and tried to be rational and logical with them...kids are smarter than you give them credit for and I considered "why" to be a reasonable question in a non life threatening situation and never considered "because I said so" to be an acceptable answer...

Their mother on the other hand was the screamer...and once she turns the switch on she throws away the key...

I definitely relate to the dad that told the kid to deal with it and not to piss off the mother.

I would do that all the time...It would be...uhhh...you know your mother told you to clean your room today before she left, right?...uuuh yeah...And you know she told me to make sure you did it, right?...uhhh yeah...and you know she's gonna be home in an hour, right?...uhhh yeah...and you know what's gonna happen to both of us if your room isn't clean, right?...uhhh yeah...so what are you gonna do?...uhhhh clean my room?...Thanks...neither one of us needs the grief...(kid cleans room)

The closest I ever got to getting physical with my son was when he was probably 17...I came home from work one day and He and my wife were nose to nose screaming at each other...I walked through the door just as he called her a "mean bitch"...(She can be but damned if I was gonna let HIM say it..LOL)...I walked up to him and picked him up by the shirt collar with one hand and slammed him against the wall and held him there...got nose to nose with him and said very quietly "don't EVER call her anything like that again"...I held him there for about 15 seconds staring at him...I thought he was gonna pee his pants...LOL...then I dropped him and said "Y'all both quit screaming and work this out"...As far as I know he never raised his voice to his mother again.

CosmicCowboy

12-13-2005, 12:55 PM

The difference between your kids and my stepkids are when I say "so what are you gonna do?"

They say "were gonna watch you clean the room so mom doesn't get all mad at you have fun."
:lol

The son basically tried that once...I checked in on him and watched him play video games for about 15 minutes, then unplugged the Nintendo right in the middle of the game, boxed it up, and took it to my office for about six weeks...:lol

easjer

12-13-2005, 12:57 PM

SpursWoman

12-13-2005, 01:00 PM

The son basically tried that once...I checked in on him and watched him play video games for about 15 minutes, then unplugged the Nintendo right in the middle of the game, boxed it up, and took it to my office for about six weeks...:lol

I love watching Chris in action ... he has no problem whatsoever doing things like this. :tu :lol

2Blonde

12-13-2005, 01:00 PM

Someone I know says *they* never acted up in public either....maybe it's an only child thing?

It's definitely not an only child thing. My daughter has certainly had her share of acting up in public too.

1369

12-13-2005, 01:19 PM

The closest I ever got to getting physical with my son was when he was probably 17...I came home from work one day and He and my wife were nose to nose screaming at each other...I walked through the door just as he called her a "mean bitch"...(She can be but damned if I was gonna let HIM say it..LOL)...I walked up to him and picked him up by the shirt collar with one hand and slammed him against the wall and held him there...got nose to nose with him and said very quietly "don't EVER call her anything like that again"...I held him there for about 15 seconds staring at him...I thought he was gonna pee his pants...LOL...then I dropped him and said "Y'all both quit screaming and work this out"...As far as I know he never raised his voice to his mother again.

If I ever did something like that, My father would have cold cocked me where I stood.

I won't stand for that from my son either (now I have no idea how I'll handle my daughter).

Duff McCartney

12-13-2005, 01:37 PM

It's easy to sit back and watch it going on and comment on the wacked out parenting skills.

Fun too.

CosmicCowboy

12-13-2005, 01:38 PM

I love watching Chris in action ... he has no problem whatsoever doing things like this. :tu :lol

And the key is making sure it's something that REALLY hurts and don't EVER tell them it's for a fixed time period...(two weeks, etc.) Just tell them they will get it back when they have earned the right to get it back...and they have short attention spans...don't let them forget you have it...After a couple of weeks I gave him a picture of it sitting on my desk...:lol

SpursWoman

12-13-2005, 01:39 PM

If I ever did something like that, My father would have cold cocked me where I stood.

I won't stand for that from my son either (now I have no idea how I'll handle my daughter).

Funny ... my dad never laid a finger on me (my mom had no such reservations, however), except that one time...when I was 17....and I called my mother a bitch. I vaguely remember getting picked up off my feet...after that it just becomes somewhat of a blur. :spin

easjer

12-13-2005, 01:39 PM

OK, now that is smart.

Slomo

12-13-2005, 01:40 PM

The son basically tried that once...I checked in on him and watched him play video games for about 15 minutes, then unplugged the Nintendo right in the middle of the game, boxed it up, and took it to my office for about six weeks...:lol
I hope you don't mind if I print this out and pin it on my white board. I think this is the kind of advice that might come handy one day.... :tu

Slomo

12-13-2005, 01:41 PM

And the key is making sure it's something that REALLY hurts and don't EVER tell them it's for a fixed time period...(two weeks, etc.) Just tell them they will get it back when they have earned the right to get it back...and they have short attention spans...don't let them forget you have it...After a couple of weeks I gave him a picture of it sitting on my desk...:lol
OK I'm printing this too.

Are you done? I don't believe in wasting paper :lol

SpursWoman

12-13-2005, 01:42 PM

And the key is making sure it's something that REALLY hurts and don't EVER tell them it's for a fixed time period...(two weeks, etc.) Just tell them they will get it back when they have earned the right to get it back...and they have short attention spans...don't let them forget you have it...After a couple of weeks I gave him a picture of it sitting on my desk...:lol

And told him that you beat his high score at just about every game he had? :lmao

CosmicCowboy

12-13-2005, 01:44 PM

Fun too.

Duff, people like you serve a very valuable purpose in child rearing too...

I would point them out in Wal Mart, get a very serious look on my face and say...

"You don't want to grow up and be like THAT do you?'...:lol

Slomo

12-13-2005, 01:46 PM

People like you serve a very valuable purpose in child rearing too...

I would point them out in Wal Mart, get a very serious look on my face and say...

"You don't want to grow up and be like THAT do you?'...:lol

I knew this one! :tu

SpursWoman

12-13-2005, 01:49 PM

"You don't want to grow up and be like THAT do you?'...:lol

Funny ... I use stuff like that as an example, too.

"That's what you'll look like if you don't eat your green beans...."

"That's what you'll look like if you don't pay attention in school......"

"That's who you'll marry if you don't work on your attitude......"

"You don't want to take a bath? .... remember how that guy smelled in line at Exxon? That's how you smell."

:lol

easjer

12-13-2005, 01:49 PM

::snicker::

ShoogarBear

12-13-2005, 02:05 PM

I constantly heard the saying

"Little boys are to be seen and not heard for one year."

Fixed. :)

SpursWoman

12-13-2005, 02:22 PM

:lmao

Mijo

12-13-2005, 02:32 PM

Fun too. Considering the fact that you practically are one of those children... I remember GIG posting a link to your blog on myspace and you wrote something to the effects of you were really pissed off because your parents didn't make supper for you.....

valluco

12-13-2005, 02:53 PM

Children… Too Funny

Sent by Pat Miller, September 22, 2000
Jump to navigation

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
This is dedicated to everyone that has been embarrassed by a child’s words or action. Have you ever asked your child a question too many times? I hope you remember my story when they start getting frustrated!

My three year old son had a lot of problems with potty training; and I was on him constantly. One day we stopped at Taco Bell for a quick lunch in between errands. It was very busy, with a full dining room. While enjoying my taco, I smelled something funny, so of course I checked my seven month old daughter, and she was clean. Then I realized that Matt had not asked to go potty in a while, so I asked, and he said “No.” I kept thinking, “Oh Lord, that child has had an accident and I don’t have any clothes with me.”

Then I said, “Matt, are you sure you did not have an accident?” “No,” he replied. I just knew that he must have had, because the smell was getting worse. So… I asked one more time, “Matt, did you have an accident?”

This time he jumped up, yanked down his pants, bent over and spread his cheeks and yelled… “SEE MOM, IT’S JUST FARTS!!” While 100 people nearly choked to death on their tacos, he calmly pulled up his pants and sat down to eat his food as if nothing happened. I was mortified… but some kind elderly people made me feel a lot better, when they came over and thanked me for the best laugh they had ever had!!!

link (http://www.ookingdom.com/laughs/016)

SpursWoman

12-13-2005, 02:56 PM

:lmao :lmao :lmao :lmao

That sounds about right. :lol

Shelly

12-13-2005, 03:42 PM

:lmao My youngest always anounced to the world when he farted.

CosmicCowboy

12-13-2005, 03:50 PM

Shelly has video of her boys doing the "fart dance"...:lol

Shelly

12-13-2005, 03:54 PM

:lol

To this day, that cracks me up! Pharts are phunny!

Ed Helicopter Jones

12-13-2005, 04:05 PM

:lol

To this day, that cracks me up! Pharts are phunny!

My little guy loves to phart. He lets out some whoppers! Man, I never knew someone with such small intestines could hold that much air!!

He's cute though. He'll let one fly, and then he'll grin and say "I too-ded!" Cracks me up everytime he does it! His mom is working hard to get him to say "excuse me", so every once in a while he'll fart and say "too-ded, cuse me". I can't help but laugh. . .and then rip a few myself to show him how it's done.

Shelly

12-13-2005, 04:20 PM

My little guy loves to phart. He lets out some whoppers! Man, I never knew someone with such small intestines could hold that much air!!

He's cute though. He'll let one fly, and then he'll grin and say "I too-ded!" Cracks me up everytime he does it! His mom is working hard to get him to say "excuse me", so every once in a while he'll fart and say "too-ded, cuse me". I can't help but laugh. . .and then rip a few myself to show him how it's done.

It's the silent, but violent ones that are killer. As I've said many times before on this here forum, if you ever needed to clear a room, just let my oldest rip a silent one. I love when he tries to deny it. It's like, "dude, nobody has farts that smell like yours."

cherylsteele

12-13-2005, 05:01 PM

"Little boys are to be seen and not heard."

Is that the Michael Jackson theory?:D

ShoogarBear

12-13-2005, 05:05 PM

From The Merck Manual of Diagnosis and Therapy, an actual medical reference:

Flatulence, which can cause great psychosocial distress, is unofficially described according to its salient characteristics: (1) the "slider" (crowded elevator type), which is released slowly and noiselessly, sometimes with devastating effect; (2) the open sphincter, or "pooh" type, which is said to be of higher temperature and more aromatic; (3) the staccato or drumbeat type, pleasantly passed in privacy; and (4) the "bark" type (described in a personal communication) is characterized by a sharp exclamatory eruption that effectively interrupts (and often concludes) conversation. Aromaticity is not a prominent feature. Rarely, this usually distressing symptom has been turned to advantage, as with a Frenchman referred to as "Le Petomane," who became affluent as an effluent performer who played tunes with the gas from his rectum on the Moulin Rouge stage.