Aggies

[Hook Dem]

A Texas Tech graduate, a University of Texas grad and a Texas Aggie were
sitting in a bar in San Antonio. The view of the river was fantastic; the
beer was ice cold and the food exceptional. "But", said the guy from Tech,
"I still prefer the beer joints back in Lubbock. There's one place where
the owner goes out of his way for the locals. When you buy 4 beers, he will
buy the 5th."

The Longhorn said "Well, at my local bar in Austin, the owner will buy your
3rd drink after you've bought 2."

"Hell, that's nothin'," the Aggie responded. "Back in College Station
there's this bar where the moment you set foot in the place they'll buy you
a drink and keep them coming all night. Then when you've had enough to
drink, they take you upstairs and see that you get laid. And it's all on the
house."

The Red Raider and the Longhorn immediately doubted the Aggie's claims.

"And this actually happened to you?" asked the Tech grad.

"No, not myself personally," admitted the Aggie. "But it did happen to my
sister."

[Jimcs50]

Q. Why doesn't USC have ice on the sidelines?

A. The guy with the recipe graduated.

Anyway, I'm hoping it rains on the Rose Bowl, something that hasn't happened in a half-century. Rain might slow down the Trojans.

You know what else slows down USC? Classes!


Q. Why did USC disband its water polo team?

A. All the horses drowned.

A guy in a bar leans over to the guy next to him and asks, "Wanna hear a USC joke?" The guy next to him replies, "Well, before you tell that joke, you should know something. I'm
6 feet tall, 200 pounds and I'm a USC graduate. The guy sitting next to me is 6-2, 225 and he's a USC graduate. The fella next to him is 6-5, 250 and he went to USC. Now, you still wanna tell that joke?" The first guy replies, "Naw, not if I'm gonna have to explain it three times."