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xrayzebra
02-23-2006, 10:02 AM
I wouldn't normally post an email joke, but this one is just to good not
to post. Especially for the dimm-o-craps.

Political Test



Just a simple test to see where you fit in the political picture.



Are you a Democrat, Republican or Southern Republican?



Here is a little test that will help you decide. The answer can be found by posing the following question:



You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, an Islamic Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, praises Allah, raises the knife, and charges at you. You are carrying a Glock cal 40, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.



What do you do?




Democrat's Answer:



Well, that's not enough information to answer the question! Does the man look poor! Or oppressed? Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack? Could we run away? What does my wife think? What about the kids? Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand? What does the law say about this situation? Does the Glock have an appropriate safety built into it? Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children? Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me? Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me? If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me? Should I call 9-1-1? Why is this street so deserted? We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day and make this happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior. This is all so confusing! I need to debate this with some friends for few days and try to come to a consensus.







Republican's Answer:



BANG!




Southern Republican's Answer:



BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click.....
(Sounds of reloading).
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click


Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?



Son: Git-r-Dun Daddy! Can I shoot the next one!



Wife: Don't you even think about taking that to the Taxidermist!

SA210
02-23-2006, 10:05 AM
You can prove that you're tough by going to war.

JoeChalupa
02-23-2006, 10:06 AM
I've read that many times and have yet to laugh.

JoeChalupa
02-23-2006, 10:07 AM
But I guess the repugnacraps will get a laugh at.


See...I can play the name game too.

xrayzebra
02-23-2006, 10:13 AM
You can prove that you're tough by going to war.

You know you are very tiresome. Your post are all the same, hate filled and
name calling and accusatory. You life must be absolutely miserable. You
say you are not a female, but a male, but you speak as a small child. You
whine and tell everyone who disagrees with you that they are attacking you.

I have answered you dumb statement time after time. I see no need to
address it further.

SA210
02-23-2006, 10:20 AM
You know you are very tiresome. Your post are all the same, hate filled and
name calling and accusatory. You life must be absolutely miserable. You
say you are not a female, but a male, but you speak as a small child. You
whine and tell everyone who disagrees with you that they are attacking you.

I have answered you dumb statement time after time. I see no need to
address it further.
You don't need to address it because you don't like the question. Funny, that you post all that crap, and I haven't mentioned anything like that. Stick to the point, because you have not answered me. And the only thing close to what you said about me is I do call you a WIMP. Because that Is what you are.

You, Vashner and the other couple of guys wanna go around proving how tough and selfish yall are by making fun of liberals who want peace. You call us all these names for not wanting to support this illegal war, but yet, You and the rest won't go fight it, nor will you send your own kids to. And you, like gtown, can only call me a girl, because you are so tough. Your really impressing people. Wimp. :rolleyes

xrayzebra
02-23-2006, 10:21 AM
You don't need to address it because you don't like the question. Funny, that you post all that crap, and I haven't mentioned anything like that. Stick to the point, because you have not answered me. And the only thing close to what you said about me is I do call you a WIMP. Because that Is what you are.

You, Vashner and the other couple of guys wanna go around proving how tough and selfish yall are by making fun of liberals who want peace. You call us all these names for not wanting to support this illegal war, but yet, You and the rest won't go fight it, nor will you send your own kids to. And you, like gtown, can only call me a girl, because you are so tough. Your really impressing people. Wimp. :rolleyes

You prove me point. End of story.

Mr. Peabody
02-23-2006, 10:25 AM
Hasn't this joke been posted on this forum before. I swear that I have read it here previously.

JoeChalupa
02-23-2006, 10:25 AM
Hasn't this joke been posted on this forum before. I swear that I have read it here previously.

Many times.

SA210
02-23-2006, 10:27 AM
You prove me point. End of story.
And you prove mine.

Oh, Gee!!
02-23-2006, 10:48 AM
Xray, I'll give you a 2/10 for the effort. It would actually have been an 1/10 had you been under the age of 65.

xrayzebra
02-23-2006, 10:52 AM
:huh ^^??

Oh, Gee!!
02-23-2006, 10:54 AM
:huh ^^??


your post wasn't very funny, Xray. On a scale from 1 to 10, I ranked your post a two out of sympathy for the fact that you're an oldie moldy.

101A
02-23-2006, 11:19 AM
No, it's funny.

It's common knowledge, however, that the majority of liberals have no sense of humor.

Oh, Gee!!
02-23-2006, 11:23 AM
No, it's funny.

It's common knowledge, however, that the majority of liberals have no sense of humor.


Now that's funny. :rolleyes

101A
02-23-2006, 11:29 AM
Now that's funny. :rolleyes


I figured you wouldn't get it.

gtownspur
02-23-2006, 12:35 PM
"But, but, we got John Stewart and Bill Maher...."

Mr. Peabody
02-23-2006, 01:53 PM
"But, but, we got John Stewart and Bill Maher...."

I thought Bill Maher was a Libertarian....?

Peter
02-23-2006, 01:58 PM
Maher claims to be a libertarian but he's reached that from a left of center POV, so his views come with a tinge of government involvement in economic activity ( I recall him arguing for a national health care system, for example). Much like someone who's 'reached' libertarianism from the right will have views with a tinge of government involvement in personal affairs.

Spurminator
02-23-2006, 02:17 PM
I thought he was just a pompous douche.

Peter
02-23-2006, 03:19 PM
He is The Pomous Douche.

George W Bush
02-23-2006, 03:28 PM
The Pomous Douche.

At your service! :tu

xrayzebra
02-23-2006, 05:28 PM
^^Thought I flushed down the commode....turd