Girlfriend's BDay + No Money = ???

[SoCalSpursFan]

Well, have no choice but to keep it cheap, but she means so much to me and I want it to be special and all...I know every female has recieved one of those "thought that counts" gifts that actually passed the test.....thoughts?

:makeout

[tlongII]

Well, have no choice but to keep it cheap, but she means so much to me and I want it to be special and all...I know every female has recieved one of those "thought that counts" gifts that actually passed the test.....thoughts?

:makeout

She might say "it's the thought that counts", but inside she's thinking "What a cheap bastard!"

:blah

[Spurminator]

Go "on a break" for a week or so.

[ShoogarBear]

No birthday nookie for you!

However, props for polling the wimmen on the "thought that counts" gifts. This should be interesting, after watching them all drool in the Diamonds thread.

[pache100]

On one of my birthdays, the guy I was dating was between jobs and really trying to save his money for bills, rent, etc. I kept telling him he didn't have to get me a present. But the day before my birthday, he convinced me that he needed to keep my car to go for a job interview and that his truck was not running good. So, I let him take me to work and keep the car. He spent all day detailing that sucker...waxing, shampooing the carpet and cloth seats, ArmorAll-ing everything. I had these seat covers that I'd made out of beach towels and he even washed and dried those and put them back on. That little Nissan Pulsar looked like a brand new one! That's probably one of the best birthday presents I ever got.

About three weeks later, after he'd gotten a job and his first pay check, he bought me some James Avery earrings and we had my birthday all over again. :eyebrows :oops :angel What a special year!

[ObiwanGinobili]

you can safely overcome the no$$ roadblock with a combination of any of the following:

oral sex - lots of it and high quality
cleaning - dishes, floors, laundry, bathrooms: everything. Even if you don;t live there.
cook her a lovely dinner (like 3 courses, IF you can cook, otherwise do nto attempt)
picnic w/ candles
massage - foot massage is great, so is all body massage.
Coupons - those cheesy made yourself coupns that are redemable later on for "cuddle time" "sex" "back rub" "shopping with out complaint" etc etc really do work. I've never met a girl that didn't go apeshit over those. They are thoughtfull

and what ever you do - try your best to set the stage.

even if you give her a homemade cake w/ homemade icing. try to pick some wild flowers to accent the table, put a nice cloth on it, etc etc.

the truth is it really is the thought that counts and it needs to be obvious that you put thought into whatever you do for her. If she;s a good girl she will ove it and will understand that you don;t have spare $$ right now.
If she is a meterialistic bitch however - there will be a fight.


good luck!

[Kori Ellis]

Picnic
Pedicure
Massage
Sex

Low cost, high fun.

[ObiwanGinobili]

On one of my birthdays, the guy I was dating was between jobs and really trying to save his money for bills, rent, etc. I kept telling him he didn't have to get me a present. But the day before my birthday, he convinced me that he needed to keep my car to go for a job interview and that his truck was not running good. So, I let him take me to work and keep the car. He spent all day detailing that sucker...waxing, shampooing the carpet and cloth seats, ArmorAll-ing everything. I had these seat covers that I'd made out of beach towels and he even washed and dried those and put them back on. That little Nissan Pulsar looked like a brand new one! That's probably one of the best birthday presents I ever got.

About three weeks later, after he'd gotten a job and his first pay check, he bought me some James Avery earrings and we had my birthday all over again. :eyebrows :oops :angel What a special year!


:tu thats a winner right there.

[1Parker1]

GF's Birthday + No Money= No Action for You.

:)

[1Parker1]

She might say "it's the thought that counts", but inside she's thinking "What a cheap bastard!"

:blah

:lol I'd never say that...

...Speaking of which, FYI, My birthday's coming also :eyebrows

[ShoogarBear]

GF's Birthday + No Money= No Action for You.

At last, honesty!


:lol I'd never say that...

...Speaking of which, FYI, My birthday's coming also :eyebrows

Give me your address, and I'll send you some coupons . . .

[Quadzilla99]

you can safely overcome the no$$ roadblock with a combination of any of the following:

oral sex - lots of it and high quality
cleaning - dishes, floors, laundry, bathrooms: everything. Even if you don;t live there.
cook her a lovely dinner (like 3 courses, IF you can cook, otherwise do nto attempt)
picnic w/ candles
massage - foot massage is great, so is all body massage.
Coupons - those cheesy made yourself coupns that are redemable later on for "cuddle time" "sex" "back rub" "shopping with out complaint" etc etc really do work. I've never met a girl that didn't go apeshit over those. They are thoughtfull

and what ever you do - try your best to set the stage.

even if you give her a homemade cake w/ homemade icing. try to pick some wild flowers to accent the table, put a nice cloth on it, etc etc.

the truth is it really is the thought that counts and it needs to be obvious that you put thought into whatever you do for her. If she;s a good girl she will ove it and will understand that you don;t have spare $$ right now.
If she is a meterialistic bitch however - there will be a fight.


good luck! That's a good point if you go through a huge amount of effort for a girl like that and she still bitches bacause you didn't spend any actual money. Well she's a cunt and you should dump her ASAP. Then fuck two of her friends.

[1Parker1]

Give me your address, and I'll send you some coupons . . .

Cheapo!!

[spurs_fan_in_exile]

Speaking as a guy who has been in this situation, I wholeheartedly recommend the massage and cleaning routes. These are also quality routes to go if you find yourself in a situation where you do have money, but don't have a clue what to buy. I used them and I wound up marrying the girl so that says all you need to know. Unless you don't want to marry this one, in which case you can do the cleaning and massage but do them very poorly.

[ShoogarBear]

I've never met a girl that didn't go apeshit over those.


We all just met one.

[ObiwanGinobili]

GF's Birthday + No Money= No Action for You.

:)


ya know - I don;t remember you complaining about all that free nookie i gve you last year on your b-day. :p

[Trainwreck2100]

Speaking as a guy who has been in this situation, I wholeheartedly recommend the massage and cleaning routes. .

Not the oral sex?????

[1Parker1]

We all just met one.

:lol :angel Please, if I wanted a rebate, I'd turn you in for a better model.

[CuckingFunt]

oral sex - lots of it and high quality
:tu

[ShoogarBear]

Not the oral sex?????


cleaning routes

[1Parker1]

ya know - I don;t remember you complaining about all that free nookie i gve you last year on your b-day. :p

:lol Waits for Shoog's head to explode....

[Mrs.Tlong]

She might say "it's the thought that counts", but inside she's thinking "What a cheap bastard!"

:blah


No, usually I call you a cheap bastard right to your face. :princess









Cheap Bastard.

[katyon6th]

Coupons - those cheesy made yourself coupns that are redemable later on for "cuddle time" "sex" "back rub" "shopping with out complaint" etc etc really do work. I've never met a girl that didn't go apeshit over those. They are thoughtfull

I think I had a boyfriend do that for me in the 6th grade and I think it made me cry it was so lame.

[spurs_fan_in_exile]

Not the oral sex?????

:lol I endorse that too, but without the cleaning and massage parts you're looking at an uphill battle just to deliver that gift.

[1Parker1]

No, usually I call you a cheap bastard right to your face. :princess









Cheap Bastard.

:lmao

[ShoogarBear]

Katy was getting oral sex in the 6th grade? Whoa.

[1Parker1]

I think I had a boyfriend do that for me in the 6th grade and I think it made me cry it was so lame.

:lmao :tu See? I'm not the only one who thinks it's lame. I think I used to give those "coupons" to my mom for her Birthday when she was little. "This coupon is good for one vacume and house cleaning job. Expires August 20th)"

[CuckingFunt]

I tried to think of an honest response for this, but it involved handcuffs, a spreader bar and a riding crop... too early in the morning to go there.

[ShoogarBear]

So under the Material Girls we have: 1Parker1, katy.

Damn, I better start saving some money.

[SpursWoman]

We all just met one.


Two of us ... oops, three .... it's sweet, but cashing them in can be tricky when it isn't your birthday anymore. :lol

And I don't think I'd like the cleaning thing, either. It is the thought that counts, but I'm very anal about cleaning ... and no one in my house cleans as thoroughly as I do, so I'd just get irritated and go back and redo it.

One thing Chris did for me at Valentine's Day that didn't cost a lot of money was he rented a helium tank from Party City and completely filled up my kitchen/dining room will a couple of hundred balloons. That was very unexpected and very awesome. Plus, he had to tie up all of those bastards himself. :makeout :)

[Extra Stout]

1Parker1: aspiring golddigger.

[katyon6th]

I don't even know what a spreader bar or a riding crop are.

Geez.

[ShoogarBear]

I think I used to give those "coupons" to my mom for her Birthday when she was little.

Now this is making my head explode.

[ShoogarBear]

Material Girls: 1Parker1, katy, SpursWoman, Mrs.Tlong

Cheap Guy's Dreams: ObiwonGinobili, pache100, Kori

Pain Girls: CuckingFunt

[Trainwreck2100]

I don't even know what a spreader bar or a riding crop are.

Geez.

It's that freaky S&M stuff

[katyon6th]

Katy was getting oral sex in the 6th grade? Whoa.

Who the fuck said anything about oral sex?

I was still wearing pigtails and babydoll dresses in the 6th grade, I didn't even know what oral sex was ... or a penis for that matter. Ew penis. :angel

[1Parker1]

1Parker1: aspiring golddigger.

:lol Now I ain't saying I'm a gold digger, but I ain't messin with no broke ....

[SpursWoman]

My daughter starts 6th grade next month ... y'all STFU. :cuss

[pache100]

One thing Chris did for me at Valentine's Day that didn't cost a lot of money was he rented a helium tank from Party City and completely filled up my kitchen/dining room will a couple of hundred balloons. That was very unexpected and very awesome. Plus, he had to tie up all of those bastards himself. :makeout :)

This is hilarious! My sister and her co-workers filled up their boss' office with black balloons on his birthday. It was very funny when he opened the door and they just came floating out into the hallway! I have always wanted to do that, but our building/offices are not conducive to it.

[katyon6th]

:lol Now I ain't saying I'm a gold digger, but I ain't messin with no broke ....

:lmao

[pache100]

Material Girls: 1Parker1, katy, SpursWoman, Mrs.Tlong

Cheap Guy's Dreams: ObiwonGinobili, pache100, Kori

Pain Girls: CuckingFunt

:lol

[1Parker1]

Now this is making my head explode.

Ewwwwwwwwww, Shoog that's nasty, you offically lost points for even thinking that.

[tlongII]

:lol I'd never say that...

...Speaking of which, FYI, My birthday's coming also :eyebrows

I have a nice gift for you, but you will have to come out here to pick it up. :smokin

[katyon6th]

My daughter starts 6th grade next month ... y'all STFU. :cuss

Hey now, I'm trying to preserve the innocence of 6th graders everywhere. I swear I didn't know what oral sex was.

[ShoogarBear]

My daughter starts 6th grade next month ... y'all STFU. :cuss

Make sure she understands . . . No Coupons From Boys.

[Mrs.Tlong]

Material Girls: 1Parker1, katy, SpursWoman, Mrs.Tlong

Cheap Guy's Dreams: ObiwonGinobili, pache100, Kori

Pain Girls: CuckingFunt


I'm not asking for the world. Just whole grain organic oats and alfalfa. Not that Costco shit.
:lol

[1Parker1]

One thing Chris did for me at Valentine's Day that didn't cost a lot of money was he rented a helium tank from Party City and completely filled up my kitchen/dining room will a couple of hundred balloons. That was very unexpected and very awesome. Plus, he had to tie up all of those bastards himself. :makeout :)

:lol That's sweet. My brother in law did the same exact thing for my sister...except he blew up the balloons over night and filled the bedroom with it and rose petals and stuff. So when she woke up the morning of her birthdya thtere were a couple hundred balloons and rose petals everywhere.

[SpursWoman]

Material Girls: 1Parker1, katy, SpursWoman, Mrs.Tlong



I'm far from a material girl ... I'd be happy with a picnic that I didn't have to cook and lots of sex. :)

[ShoogarBear]

Ewwwwwwwwww, Shoog that's nasty, you offically lost points for even thinking that.

Um, read what you said again.

[tlongII]

:lmao :tu See? I'm not the only one who thinks it's lame. I think I used to give those "coupons" to my mom for her Birthday when she was little. "This coupon is good for one vacume and house cleaning job. Expires August 20th)"

Was her birthday August 20th?

[Trainwreck2100]

Hey now, I'm trying to preserve the innocence of 6th graders everywhere. I swear I didn't know what oral sex was.


So did you call it "the capri sun???"

[1Parker1]

Um, read what you said again.

Well you loser, You KNOW i DIDN'T mean it like that!!! I explained that those coupons were for house cleaning and stuff....

yech, i think i may barf...

[Mrs.Tlong]

I have a nice gift for you, but you will have to come out here to pick it up. :smokin


RUN 1PARKER1 ! RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!!!

He'll have a shock stick and a crate around the corner - and he'll say "let me just show you this great gift I got you.. it's right here down this dark alley"

trust me.

[1Parker1]

Was her birthday August 20th?

:lol Yea.

[katyon6th]

It's that freaky S&M stuff

It fascinates me that you know this.

[ShoogarBear]

:rolleyes


I think I used to give those "coupons" to my mom for her Birthday when she was little.

Some people around here have such filthy minds.

[Trainwreck2100]

It fascinates me that you know this.

It's called google

[Sportcamper]

She might say "it's the thought that counts", but inside she's thinking "What a cheap bastard!"

:blah

http://www.lakersbrethren.com/LMAOlaMaoCat.jpg

[DisgruntledLionFan#54,927]

:rolleyes



Some people around here have such filthy minds.


I'm trying to figure out that dynamic.

[katyon6th]

It's called google

You killed my fascination, you suck.

[Trainwreck2100]

You killed my fascination, you suck.

I do have a coupon

[katyon6th]

I do have a coupon

Something tells me you wouldn't know what to do with it.

[SpursWoman]

You killed my fascination, you suck.


You can always replace the fascination with wonder. As in, "I wonder when he'll ever get to use all of this knowledge...". :lol

[timvp]

I gave Kori coupons once. I cut out like 50 squares, wrote the info on each one and then made an envelope to hold them all. Turned out to be a two hour craft job.

That was like four years ago and Kori never redeemed one damn coupon :lol :cry

So yeah, the coupon route is not something I would recommend.

[ShoogarBear]

I gave Kori coupons once. I cut out like 50 squares, wrote the info on each one and then made an envelope to hold them all. Turned out to be a two hour craft job.

That was like four years ago and Kori never redeemed one damn coupon :lol :cry

So yeah, the coupon route is not something I would recommend.

PWNT! :lmao :lmao

[Jimcs50]

thoughts?

:makeout


Ummm, you are a loser?


:)

[PinkBunny]

trainwreck: officially the internet's most sexed out virgin.

[PinkBunny]

I gave Kori coupons once. I cut out like 50 squares, wrote the info on each one and then made an envelope to hold them all. Turned out to be a two hour craft job.

That was like four years ago and Kori never redeemed one damn coupon :lol :cry

So yeah, the coupon route is not something I would recommend.


If she finds that envelope and turns them all in tonight I predict you'll be on life support by morning.

[Kori Ellis]

I gave Kori coupons once. I cut out like 50 squares, wrote the info on each one and then made an envelope to hold them all. Turned out to be a two hour craft job.

That was like four years ago and Kori never redeemed one damn coupon :lol :cry

So yeah, the coupon route is not something I would recommend.

Why would I need to use those coupons when you do me everyday without me asking?

I'm saving them for when you are old ... or less interested or something.

[Trainwreck2100]

Something tells me you wouldn't know what to do with it.

Once again that's what google's for, I'm gonna need a laptop, a flashlight, and dental floss????

[jman3000]

Why would I need to use those coupons when you do me everyday without me asking?

I'm saving them for when you are old ... or less interested or something.
lmfao...

i hate when i get all sexed up and nobody asks : (


or for that matter... nobody is around

:depressed

[katyon6th]

I just couldn't imagine asking for sex. What a concept.

[Kori Ellis]

I gave Kori coupons once. I cut out like 50 squares, wrote the info on each one and then made an envelope to hold them all. Turned out to be a two hour craft job.

That was like four years ago and Kori never redeemed one damn coupon :lol :cry

So yeah, the coupon route is not something I would recommend.
And just so you know, I know exactly where the coupons are ... four years later. They are in the top drawer of the tall bureau in our room, inside my sunglasses case.

[Extra Stout]

I would never try the coupon thing. Of course, I have plenty of $$$$$$$ and would never have to resort to that.

[tlongII]

lmfao...

i hate when i get all sexed up and nobody asks : (


or for that matter... nobody is around

:depressed

That's what Google is for.

[ShoogarBear]

And just so you know, I know exactly where the coupons are ... four years later. They are in the top drawer of the tall bureau in our room, inside my sunglasses case.

Yeah, the next time you check, they will be replaced by a bunch of jman coupons . . .

[Kori Ellis]

Yeah, the next time you check, they will be replaced by a bunch of jman coupons . . .


:lmao

[Trainwreck2100]

That's what Google is for.


http://mywits.com/images/uploads/googleoo.jpg

[Extra Stout]

Yeah, the next time you check, they will be replaced by a bunch of jman coupons . . .
jman already knew where they were... he tries to be discreet.

[jman3000]

:rollin:rollin

but i'd be too lazy to make my own... i'd probaby just cross out items in existing coupons and put my name on it... so you could buy me once and get 50% off or whatever.

novel concept

[Kori Ellis]

http://mywits.com/images/uploads/googleoo.jpg

Where's Buttaface's nipples?

[ShoogarBear]

Where's Buttaface's nipples?

:lmao

I had to go back and look at the post to confirm she was a buttaface.

[katyon6th]

Thank you for posting the link, Kori.

One of my co-workers just told me I shouldn't be looking at that kind of stuff. Geezus.

[Trainwreck2100]

Look I just found the pick I'm not going on a nipple hunt

[katyon6th]

I would never try the coupon thing. Of course, I have plenty of $$$$$$$ and would never have to resort to that.

You drive me crazier with every keystroke you make.

Ugh.

[Mrs.Jimcs50]

Ummm, you are a loser?


:)


Jim bought me a set of golf clubs once for my birthday.
I said, "Honey, I know we've only been married 10 years, but I don't golf". He said, "Well, we don't want these to go to waste!"

:flipoff

[Kori Ellis]

:lmao

I had to go back and look at the post to confirm she was a buttaface.

I can find the beauty in almost anyone, but she epitomized buttaface to me.

[Kori Ellis]

You drive me crazier with every keystroke you make.

Ugh.

Are you masturbating to his posts again?

[katyon6th]

Are you masturbating to his posts again?

It's unfortunate I'm at work. This white linen skirt is feeling clingy.

[SpursWoman]

Are you masturbating to his posts again?


Holy crap. deja vu! :wow :lmao

[SoCalSpursFan]

maybe I should just give her a print out of this thread.

a gift that keeps on giving. :lol

[timvp]

I almost forgot about this thread. (http://spurstalk.com/forums/showthread.php?t=8017)

Giving a pedicure isn't the easiest thing to do in the world. Especially for someone who can't color within the lines.

But I enjoyed the time with my client.

:smokin

[Extra Stout]

You drive me crazier with every keystroke you make.

Ugh.
Since I didn't use any big words in that post, you're just blatantly golddigging.

[Extra Stout]

Are you masturbating to his posts again?
If she read a William F. Buckley column, would she self-asphyxiate?

[katyon6th]

If she read a William F. Buckley column, would she self-asphyxiate?

Cum ...

... bustible.

[ShoogarBear]

Since I didn't use any big words in that post, you're just blatantly golddigging.

It was the "$$$$$$$$$" that got her wet.

[mcornelio]

lj u idiot... u should expirations on those coupons... now when your 70 kori's gonna pull em out and get you... you better steal them while u have the chance.

[Mixability]

lj u idiot... u should expirations on those coupons... now when your 70 kori's gonna pull em out and get you... you better steal them while u have the chance.

what are you doing in a "girlfriend" thread?

[1Parker1]

:lmao I completely missed that Timvp/Anniversary thread. Good Times :tu

[mcornelio]

what are you doing in a "girlfriend" thread?
:lol

[Gatita]

I gave Kori coupons once. I cut out like 50 squares, wrote the info on each one and then made an envelope to hold them all. Turned out to be a two hour craft job.

That was like four years ago and Kori never redeemed one damn coupon :lol :cry

So yeah, the coupon route is not something I would recommend.


Aww.... que sweet. :spin

The best gift I have recieved that didn't require dinero was a love letter. :makeout

[2Blonde]

Aww.... que sweet. :spin

The best gift I have recieved that didn't require dinero was a love letter. :makeoutThat's all I ever ask for. My husband writes me a love letter for every birthday and anniversary. It has taken me over 9 years to get it through his head that this is really all I want.

I would prefer he just surprise me with gifts randomly when we aren't saving for something like the new house we're building. I would rather him take the money he was going to spend on a bday gift and put it in savings and write me a really great letter and plan a night of wild sex.:smokin

[Cant_Be_Faded]

Well, have no choice but to keep it cheap, but she means so much to me and I want it to be special and all...I know every female has recieved one of those "thought that counts" gifts that actually passed the test.....thoughts?

:makeout


aHAHAHAHAHAHHA, dude you are fucked!!! That thought that counts stuff is a myth!!!

rofl
let us know how it turns out

[CuckingFunt]

That thought that counts stuff is a myth!!!
No it's not.

Price/value is nowhere near as important to me as the thought behind it.



Then again, I'm easy to please. Bend me over and take me on the dining room table, and I'm yours forever.

[Cant_Be_Faded]

Another reason your femality is too good to be true.

thought that counts is a myth.

[katyon6th]

Another reason your femality is too good to be true.

thought that counts is a myth.

:lol :lol

[CuckingFunt]

Another reason your femality is too good to be true.
To quote the drunken man-whore:

whatever.

[Extra Stout]

Another reason your femality is too good to be true.

thought that counts is a myth.
CBF,

Are you familiar with the frustration many women experience when they find a man with all the character traits they want, only to find out he is gay?

[Shawn Carter]

Well, have no choice but to keep it cheap, but she means so much to me and I want it to be special and all...I know every female has recieved one of those "thought that counts" gifts that actually passed the test.....thoughts?

:makeout
sucks to be you

[furry_spurry]

I am a thought that counts person-- far better than an expensive gift with no thought. I can buy things for myself.

Does she have any particular cause or charity that is important to her? You could do something for it in her name- like volunteer.

And a man who actually takes the time to write something down to you-- priceless.

[Cant_Be_Faded]

CBF,

Are you familiar with the frustration many women experience when they find a man with all the character traits they want, only to find out he is gay?


no im not a chick nor am i gay

[Extra Stout]

no im not a chick nor am i gay
Ah, but CuckingFunt is both.

[Cant_Be_Faded]

melmart is a true lesbian, but cuckingfunt still has not convinced me. maybe its cuz melly posted a pic, and she was in on kori's 'girls got game' thingie

Rosario Dawson IS one of the hotter chicks these days..but thats something a guy would say.

[CuckingFunt]

melmart is a true lesbian, but cuckingfunt still has not convinced me. maybe its cuz melly posted a pic, and she was in on kori's 'girls got game' thingie

Rosario Dawson IS one of the hotter chicks these days..but thats something a guy would say.
Probably because you've been waiting for me to convince you that I'm a lesbian, when I'm not.

I'm bisexual.

50/50, straight down the middle, decidedly undecided, has no preference, bi.

[jman3000]

To quote the drunken man-whore:

whatever.
whatever

[TheRage]

Well, have no choice but to keep it cheap, but she means so much to me and I want it to be special and all...I know every female has recieved one of those "thought that counts" gifts that actually passed the test.....thoughts?

:makeout




BOx Wine + 1.00 French bread at HEB + random candle = " a night in Paris setting" and drunk happy gf

[ShoogarBear]

Probably because you've been waiting for me to convince you that I'm a lesbian, when I'm not.

I'm bisexual.

50/50, straight down the middle, decidedly undecided, has no preference, bi.
i.e., THREE-WAY CITY, BAYBEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[TheRage]

now that i think about it... you can just use the wine on her..... or if you are a true fuck up, drink the wine and when you are drunk just tell her the truth then pass out.

[katyon6th]

Rage, I love you!

[TheRage]

Thank you :)
I'm quite fond of you myself.