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GODADDYSA
12-09-2004, 10:37 AM
Dear Abby:

My husband is not happy with my mood swings.

The other day, he bought me a mood ring so he would be able to monitor my moods.

When I'm in a good mood it turns green.

When I'm in a bad mood it leaves a big fucking red mark on his forehead.

Maybe next time he'll buy me a diamond.

Sincerely,

Bitchy in Illinois

:lol
SpursWoman
12-09-2004, 10:38 AM
:lmao :lmao :lmao :lmao :lmao
travis2
12-09-2004, 10:43 AM
*spewing coffee all over my monitor*
AlamoSpursFan
12-09-2004, 11:32 AM
It was funnier as a Larry The Cable Guy joke...
GODADDYSA
12-09-2004, 11:53 AM
hmmm - hadn't heard that one
T Park
12-09-2004, 02:50 PM
"I tell you what I was madder than skinhead watchin the jeffersons"

"Lord I apologize...."


Larry the cable guy is a funny mfer. As is Rodney Carrington.
violentkitten
12-09-2004, 02:54 PM
tpark when are you going to post a picture of your fiance
bowlephant
12-09-2004, 03:33 PM
"I tell you what I was madder than skinhead watchin the jeffersons"

"Lord I apologize...."


Larry the cable guy is a funny mfer. As is Rodney Carrington.


"GIT-R-DONE"
SpursWoman
12-09-2004, 03:36 PM
"GIT-R-DONE"



Oh....that guy. He's funny :lol
CosmicCowboy
12-09-2004, 03:57 PM
he did this hilarious piece on being on a puddlejumper airline from Beaumont to Houston...lost an engine and the guy next to him was freaking out...hilarious stuff...
CosmicCowboy
12-09-2004, 04:03 PM
the guy next to him was freaking and wanted to know if the plane could fly on one engine...

"hell yeah it can fly on one engine...right to the damn crash site...It'll fly so well we'll probably beat the EMS by thirty minutes..."

:lmao
Useruser666
12-09-2004, 04:22 PM
Anybody ever see "The Amazing Johnathan" or whatever his name is? :lol
jalbre6
12-09-2004, 04:36 PM
the guy next to him was freaking and wanted to know if the plane could fly on one engine...

"hell yeah it can fly on one engine...right to the damn crash site...It'll fly so well we'll probably beat the EMS by thirty minutes..."
CC-

The guy you're talking about is Ron "Tater Salad" White, who'd funnier than the other three combined.
CosmicCowboy
12-09-2004, 04:46 PM
ahh...that sounds right...I heard it on a CD and couldn't stop laughing...another hilarious piece was about deer hunting...

he was talking about him always hitting deer with his truck and his cousin the deer hunter...his cousin bragging about his rifle and how many feet per second the bullet would go, dressing up in camo, putting deer piss on his boots etc...talking about how hard deer hunting is...

he was like.."you're going about this all wrong...your problem is that bullet is just goin WAY too fast...what you need to do is slow that sumbitch down to 55mph and put headlights on it and the fucking deer will just throw themselves in front of it!"...

seeeut...I got almost got beer up my nose on that one..:lmao
travis2
12-10-2004, 07:29 AM
ahh...that sounds right...I heard it on a CD and couldn't stop laughing...another hilarious piece was about deer hunting...

he was talking about him always hitting deer with his truck and his cousin the deer hunter...his cousin bragging about his rifle and how many feet per second the bullet would go, dressing up in camo, putting deer piss on his boots etc...talking about how hard deer hunting is...

he was like.."you're going about this all wrong...your problem is that bullet is just goin WAY too fast...what you need to do is slow that sumbitch down to 55mph and put headlights on it and the fucking deer will just throw themselves in front of it!"...

seeeut...I got almost got beer up my nose on that one..:lmao

hmmmmm...now THERE'S a thought...:lol