PlaneFast
08-10-2007, 12:07 AM
While looking for places in Oakland/Berkeley to watch Spurs games this coming season, I found this posting on a Denver Nuggets Forum (http://www.nuggets.proboards1.com/index.cgi?board=nba&action=display&thread=1131477174) (wtf?). It's old (2005) but funny. Could use an updated roster. Delete if it's been posted here before.
Still looking for a good place to watch Spurs games in the east bay though.
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Re: The Official Spurs thread
« Reply #5 on Nov 8, 2005, 3:44pm » by briggs
I was reading and article in the Economist ( actual magazine so no link) and it had information about a poll of the South American countries in respect to hating the good ol USA. Argentina was hands down the leader in hatred of all things American. I just bet that Manu and Oberto were wishing they could have been at the South American Summit anti-usa rally holding hands with Hugo Chavez and Diego Maradonna and chanting death to America. So that got me thinking that the Spurs could actually be an anti American terrorist cell bent on destroying American basketball with boring play and excessive flopping, holding and fouling to demoralize the American public. For that to happen they also need additional operatives on the team, please consider the following:
Tony Parker: He is French which obviously means he holds America in contempt and would be a willing cohort.
Nazr Mohammed : Rumor has it he is in a sleeper cell with Mahmoud Abdul Rauf
Bruce Bowen: He went to Cal State Fullerton, now I’m not sure exactly where that is but its close enough to Berkeley to brand him a red pinko socialist and obvious anti American conspirator.
Tim Duncan: I can’t even remember what Island he is from but I do remember listening to a lot of reggae when I was stoned and a lot of it was anti american. Therefore Duncan is a revolutionary who wants to get all of Americas youth stoned and apathetic paving the way for the Rastafarian takeover.
Beno Udrih and Rasho Nestorvic: Both from former soviet block countries and most likely KGB plants
Nick Van Exel : He hates everyone, possibly brought in to be the ring leader. Second motive would be that he upset that LA, Denver, Dallas and Portland did not recognize his Jordanesqe superstar status and he wants to destroy the league because they did not love him.
Robert Horry: He has develop cult icon status in the world of slackers, the whole not wanting to show up until the playoffs thing has shown the youth of America its OK to not try. I would guess he will start a cult of slackers when he leaves basketball and it would grow faster if he could bring the country into a tailspin, at the very least he is suspect.
Brent Barry: If he is not Irish he aspires to be and is covert agent for the IRA.
Sean Marks: he is from New Zealand, just ask any of the Aussies on the board those guys are always causing trouble so he joined up out of a spirit of general contempt for all things not all black.
Popovich: As an alum from Air Force I don’t think it’s a stretch to say he has a grudge against this country for not supplying Fisher Deberry with enough black athletes to beat TCU. So as revenge he has assembled this team to destroy black Americas favorite sport.
Michael Finley: Well they needed a consistent outside threat off the bench who could play D.
I think this analysis shows the Spurs are indeed evil and Anti American. Someone please contact homeland security as this easily warrants a threat level of elevated burnt sienna.
Still looking for a good place to watch Spurs games in the east bay though.
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Re: The Official Spurs thread
« Reply #5 on Nov 8, 2005, 3:44pm » by briggs
I was reading and article in the Economist ( actual magazine so no link) and it had information about a poll of the South American countries in respect to hating the good ol USA. Argentina was hands down the leader in hatred of all things American. I just bet that Manu and Oberto were wishing they could have been at the South American Summit anti-usa rally holding hands with Hugo Chavez and Diego Maradonna and chanting death to America. So that got me thinking that the Spurs could actually be an anti American terrorist cell bent on destroying American basketball with boring play and excessive flopping, holding and fouling to demoralize the American public. For that to happen they also need additional operatives on the team, please consider the following:
Tony Parker: He is French which obviously means he holds America in contempt and would be a willing cohort.
Nazr Mohammed : Rumor has it he is in a sleeper cell with Mahmoud Abdul Rauf
Bruce Bowen: He went to Cal State Fullerton, now I’m not sure exactly where that is but its close enough to Berkeley to brand him a red pinko socialist and obvious anti American conspirator.
Tim Duncan: I can’t even remember what Island he is from but I do remember listening to a lot of reggae when I was stoned and a lot of it was anti american. Therefore Duncan is a revolutionary who wants to get all of Americas youth stoned and apathetic paving the way for the Rastafarian takeover.
Beno Udrih and Rasho Nestorvic: Both from former soviet block countries and most likely KGB plants
Nick Van Exel : He hates everyone, possibly brought in to be the ring leader. Second motive would be that he upset that LA, Denver, Dallas and Portland did not recognize his Jordanesqe superstar status and he wants to destroy the league because they did not love him.
Robert Horry: He has develop cult icon status in the world of slackers, the whole not wanting to show up until the playoffs thing has shown the youth of America its OK to not try. I would guess he will start a cult of slackers when he leaves basketball and it would grow faster if he could bring the country into a tailspin, at the very least he is suspect.
Brent Barry: If he is not Irish he aspires to be and is covert agent for the IRA.
Sean Marks: he is from New Zealand, just ask any of the Aussies on the board those guys are always causing trouble so he joined up out of a spirit of general contempt for all things not all black.
Popovich: As an alum from Air Force I don’t think it’s a stretch to say he has a grudge against this country for not supplying Fisher Deberry with enough black athletes to beat TCU. So as revenge he has assembled this team to destroy black Americas favorite sport.
Michael Finley: Well they needed a consistent outside threat off the bench who could play D.
I think this analysis shows the Spurs are indeed evil and Anti American. Someone please contact homeland security as this easily warrants a threat level of elevated burnt sienna.