Things Woman should know about men.

[angel_luv]

I thought these were clever. :)

http://dating.personals.yahoo.com/singles/datingtips/16758/11-things-women-dont-know-about-men

1. Getting angry at us for not reading your mind is like getting angry at yourself for not being able to fly. It's not just futile, it's physically impossible.

2. Yes, we do think Jessica Alba is hot. Sometimes we're even dumb enough to admit it.

3. Don't ask us to understand your shoe fetish. Asking us to respect it is even sort of pushing it.

4. You do look good without makeup, just not as good as you look with it.

5. Ever notice how we don't fight with our male friends? That's why we get so frustrated when we fight with you.

6. You care what you're wearing infinitely more than we do. In fact, if you're naked when you open the front door, you won't hear an argument from us.

7. You don't like to get hit on in public, you don't want to date online and you don't want to be set up on blind dates. Tell us if sending messenger pigeons is an appropriate way of courting. Because if it is, we're all over it.

8. There should a statute of limitations on stupid things that we said that can come back to haunt us
There should a statute of limitations on stupid things that we said that can come back to haunt us. I propose 24 hours.

9. Cooking dinner for a man is like buying flowers for a woman, except it takes a lot more time, effort and thought for you to do it. Thanks. We appreciate it.

10. We actually like your girly pet-names for us, but please, not in front of the guys!

11. Just because we like looking at the women in Maxim doesn't mean we want to actually converse with the women in Maxim. Not for long, anyway.

12. Your nice guy friends are the most reliable source for telling you if your new boyfriend's a jerk. And he probably is. (By the way, you might want to consider marrying that nice guy who's giving you advice about the jerk.)


Evan Marc Katz is a dating coach and the author of two books: "I Can't Believe I'm Buying This Book - A Commonsense Guide to Successful Internet Dating" and "Why You're Still Single: Things Your Friends Would Tell You If You Promised Not to Get Mad." Reach him directly at evanmarckatz.com.

[timvp]

So you dropped Rasho just because he got benched? :nope

[T Park]

12. Your nice guy friends are the most reliable source for telling you if your new boyfriend's a jerk. And he probably is. (By the way, you might want to consider marrying that nice guy who's giving you advice about the jerk.)



oh god so much truth in THAT.

[angel_luv]

So you dropped Rasho just because he got benched? :nope

I never held Rasho so how could I drop him. :depressed

Thanks for the reminder, L.J. :(

:lol

Here are some more observations from the author.
http://dating.personals.yahoo.com/singles/datingtips/49647/10-secrets-about-men;_ylc=X3oDMTFsZnVqNG1yBF9TAzI3MTYxNDkEc2VjA2ZwX 3RvZGF5BHNsawMxMC1zZWNyZXRzLWFib3V0LW1lbgR6egNh
1. You don't want to be judged for your looks; we don't want to be judged
for our wallets. Unless we're ugly and have lots of money. Then it's OK.

2. You're not the only person who likes to be called "sexy."

3. Saying "I love you" is a major step in a man's life. That's why we wait for you to take that step first.

4. We are not being cheap when we make $35,000 a year and can't afford to pay every single date. We are merely being practical.

5. A guy who spends too much time in the gym is making up for something else that's lacking. Unfortunately, you can't figure out what it is until it's too late.

6. Don't get mad at us because we don't remember what you were wearing on our first date, or the angle of the light during our first kiss. We were probably drunk.

7. You're good in bed if you make us feel like stallions.

8. Jealousy isn't a sign that you love us more, it's a sign that you trust us less.

9. Hanging up on us is a surefire way to make sure we go to bed mad.

And my ( Angel's not author's) personal favorite...
10. We're sorry. Whatever it is, we're sorry.

[T Park]

These are fantastic.

Rock on bro.

[Jimcs50]

13. We only like to go shopping when we are going to get something cool for ourselves.

14. Yes, we can actually sit at a poker table for 8-10 hrs or watch sports on tv for 8-10 hrs and not get bored.

15. We will ask for directions, eventually, just let us decide when to do it.

16. We can not resist looking at cleavage, so do not get offended we you catch us doing so.

[marini martini]

17. We love to go shopping with you, and buy you what you want, because it makes you horny, and I get rewarded later that night.

18. I've been nice to all my customers at work today, and had to eat their sh@t,, so now I feel like giving you sh@t, to see you cry.

19. Honey, let's have make up sex.

[MrChug]

NOW HERE ALL THE REAL RULES:

Ladies, please (if you've seen these before, there's a reason why they're still around) read these, understand them and make them the bible for your peace in a relationship if you are in one (kinda tounge in cheek, but still...this is good shit :)) There's alot of truth in these:

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
down. You can handle it. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear
us complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Sunday = sports. It's like the full moon. Let it be.
1. Crying is blackmail.
1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one Subtle hints do not
work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it! :bang
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question. :)
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what
we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor. :dramaquee
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact,
all comments become null and void after 7 days.
1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to
act like soap opera guys.
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. :cooldevil
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done.
Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during
commercials.
1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do we.
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach,
for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no
idea what mauve is.
1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that. :hat
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like
nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the
hassle.
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you
don't want to hear.
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or monster trucks.
1. You have enough clothes.
1. You have too many shoes.
1. I am in shape. ROUND is a shape.:corn:
1. Thank you for reading this; Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch
tonight, but did you know men really don't mind that, it's like camping.

[boutons_]

'oh god so much truth in THAT."

So, t, what's your boyfriends' advice on your new boyfriend?

[angel_luv]

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
down. You can handle it. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear
us complaining about you leaving it down.

I actually really do agree with this rule. It makes perfect sense to me.

[angel_luv]

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.


1. Thank you for reading this; Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch
tonight, but did you know men really don't mind that, it's like camping.

:lol

I say thank God for men.

If the whole world thought like girls, this place would be too crazy.
Of course, the same thing would be true if the whole world thought like men.

[RuffnReadyOzStyle]

Nice one Angel. :)

And I agree with some of the extras posted by other people, but not with all of them.

The most interesting one is this: "Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!" Why must women communicate in hints? Why doesn't "speaking your mind" work for them? I have never understood that.


oh god so much truth in THAT.

Well, we certainly agree on that T Park. Not so much now, but when I was younger girls I was close to used to bitch to me all the time about their areshole boyfriends and I used to be nice and sympathise, but I was a young fool. These days I'm just straight with them and tell them that they shouldn't date fuckwits, and if they want to continue to do so I don't want to hear about it.

[angel_luv]

The most interesting one is this: "Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!" Why must women communicate in hints? Why doesn't "speaking your mind" work for them? I have never understood that.

You say that as if men are always receptive and obliging when a woman directly speaks her mind.


Consider that hints could be a woman's way of testing the waters to see if you are really listening and if will come through.


Not saying it is right or necessarily logical ( even though I have done it), but it is what it is.

[spurs_fan_in_exile]

12. Your nice guy friends are the most reliable source for telling you if your new boyfriend's a jerk. And he probably is. (By the way, you might want to consider marrying that nice guy who's giving you advice about the jerk.)
There was a stand up whose name escapes me that did a funny bit on that phenomenon.

"Imagine if you went into a job interview and the manager said, 'Wow, you have a great resume. You're perfectly qualified; hell, you're precisely what we are looking for. But we're not going to hire you. We are going to hang on to your resume and use it to gauge every other applicant we see before hiring someone much worse than you. They might not even meet half the criteria we're actually looking for! We will hang onto your contact info, however, so we can call you from time to time to complain about the guy we hired instead of you, but just so we're clear, you will never get this job.'"

[ploto]

If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you
don't want to hear.

The truest of all.

[fatsack]

If you want to know what we're thinking, just ask us.
Just be sure you want to really hear our answer.

[Fillmoe]

NOW HERE ALL THE REAL RULES:

Ladies, please (if you've seen these before, there's a reason why they're still around) read these, understand them and make them the bible for your peace in a relationship if you are in one (kinda tounge in cheek, but still...this is good shit :)) There's alot of truth in these:

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
down. You can handle it. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear
us complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Sunday = sports. It's like the full moon. Let it be.
1. Crying is blackmail.
1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one Subtle hints do not
work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it! :bang
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question. :)
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what
we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor. :dramaquee
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact,
all comments become null and void after 7 days.
1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to
act like soap opera guys.
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. :cooldevil
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done.
Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during
commercials.
1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do we.
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach,
for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no
idea what mauve is.
1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that. :hat
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like
nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the
hassle.
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you
don't want to hear.
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or monster trucks.
1. You have enough clothes.
1. You have too many shoes.
1. I am in shape. ROUND is a shape.:corn:
1. Thank you for reading this; Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch
tonight, but did you know men really don't mind that, it's like camping.


Did you not learn to count past 1 or something?

[Mixability]

Did you not learn to count past 1 or something?


I think they're numbered by order of importance.

[Fillmoe]

I think they're numbered by order of importance.


That would make sense..... :lol

[Shelly]

Quote:




1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
down. You can handle it. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear
us complaining about you leaving it down.




I actually really do agree with this rule. It makes perfect sense to me.

Nope...I live in a house full of testosterone. The day that they will be allowed to leave the toilet seat up will be the day they start cleaning the toilet.

Since none of them can be bothered to clean their 'misses', the seat better be down!!!

[1369]

Nope...I live in a house full of testosterone. The day that they will be allowed to leave the toilet seat up will be the day they start cleaning the toilet.

Since none of them can be bothered to clean their 'misses', the seat better be down!!!

Well, THAT makes sense.

Just give 'em a bigger target so they don't hit the floor?

[SpursWoman]

Nope...I live in a house full of testosterone. The day that they will be allowed to leave the toilet seat up will be the day they start cleaning the toilet.

Since none of them can be bothered to clean their 'misses', the seat better be down!!!


That's the only thing that bothers me about it. Otherwise, I'm usually inclined to turn the light on and look before I put my naked ass onto anything...so I wouldn't be getting any surprises, up or down, anyway. :fro

[easjer]

Well, in our house, the seat needs to be down so the lid can be down so the dog doesn't get into the toilet. If I can be bothered to put the lid down, so can he.

As for other things, some are funny, some I agree with and some I disagree with. I think I'm pretty lucky that I found a great guy that falls in line with the things I agree with and the things I disagree with. He's a pretty great catch. Fortunately, we didn't fall into the nice guy friend trap.

[angel_luv]

The author should have included a rule about how guys saying " I'll call" does not necessarily mean they will.

Because EVERYONE knows, a girl would so much rather a guy say he is going to call and then NOT instead of just being truthful upfront that he has no intention of phoning. :rolleyes

[jman3000]

girls are gay.

[CuckingFunt]

girls are gay.Well... the fun ones are.

[jman3000]

amen.

[SpursWoman]

amen.


Why? That's just a whole 'nother gender you have to compete with. :spin

[tlongII]

The author should have included a rule about how guys saying " I'll call" does not necessarily mean they will.

Because EVERYONE knows, a girl would so much rather a guy say he is going to call and then NOT instead of just being truthful upfront that he has no intention of phoning. :rolleyes

Angel, I think we should discuss this. I'll call you later.

[angel_luv]

Angel, I think we should discuss this. I'll call you later.

:lol T Long.

And FYI, I will no longer accept the phrase " I will call you later."

Later is too broad a term.

Someone told me this weekend they would call me later.
It is later ( two days worth!!!!) and I am still waiting.



So wrong number, please try again.

[RuffnReadyOzStyle]

You say that as if men are always receptive and obliging when a woman directly speaks her mind.

Consider that hints could be a woman's way of testing the waters to see if you are really listening and if will come through.

Not saying it is right or necessarily logical ( even though I have done it), but it is what it is.

I can only speak for myself, but yes, I've always far preferred women to directly speak their minds. However, I can understand that some men probably don't react well to it.

Oh, and as for the guys who say "I'll call you" but don't, I think that's a terrible way to behave too. I know guys who insist that you have to wait 4 days, and this and that and 'play the game' - I say forget that, if you like someone you call them the next day.


There was a stand up whose name escapes me that did a funny bit on that phenomenon.

"Imagine if you went into a job interview and the manager said, 'Wow, you have a great resume. You're perfectly qualified; hell, you're precisely what we are looking for. But we're not going to hire you. We are going to hang on to your resume and use it to gauge every other applicant we see before hiring someone much worse than you. They might not even meet half the criteria we're actually looking for! We will hang onto your contact info, however, so we can call you from time to time to complain about the guy we hired instead of you, but just so we're clear, you will never get this job.'"

Damn straight. That there sums up ages 16-24 for me. Thankfully that time in my life is long gone...

[angel_luv]

Oh, and as for the guys who say "I'll call you" but don't, I think that's a terrible way to behave too. I know guys who insist that you have to wait 4 days, and this and that and 'play the game' - I say forget that, if you like someone you call them the next day.



Exactly.

What is annoying to me about this situation is I keep hearing Greg Behrendt
( I've read all his books and used to watch his talk show when it was on t.v.) in my mind, quoting me his ( Greg's) signature line, " He just not that into you!"

And Greg's probably right, but no need to rub it in! :lol

[RuffnReadyOzStyle]

Sorry to hear that, Angel.

If this guy's not into you, then he's not worth it anyway, but I know the feeling when you like someone and they won't give anything back even though they give the impression they want to - sometimes they're not into you, sometimes their emotions are moving slower than yours, sometimes they're afraid of showing how they feel... in the end, you never know what's going on in people's heads, but their actions speak volumes.

[angel_luv]

Sorry to hear that, Angel.

If this guy's not into you, then he's not worth it anyway, but I know the feeling when you like someone and they won't give anything back even though they give the impression they want to - sometimes they're not into you, sometimes their emotions are moving slower than yours, sometimes they're afraid of showing how they feel... in the end, you never know what's going on in people's heads, but their actions speak volumes.


Thanks and vey true.

I have been way to obsessed about the whole no call thing anyways.

I get upset about silly stuff when I am tired. I am trying to get promoted at work and so have been putting in a lot of extra hours.
Better to focus my energy on that. :)

[Phenomanul]

Angel... I would call you on Friday, but I don't have your number... :spin

and unfortunately I also don't reside in San Antonio...

[angel_luv]

Angel... I would call you on Friday, but I don't have your number... :spin

and unfortunately I also don't reside in San Antonio...


Thank you. :)

I was thinking about something though- about how suddenly a phone call is just not a phone call.

I mean, I've had friends forget to call me or take several days to do so but I never obsessed about it.

So it seems a little unfair to the guy that I am putting so much significance on when he calls.

And I wonder, what makes me do that?

Are the rules I am forcing common sense and common decency or are they unreasonable, ill advised, and over dramatized?

I'm really not sure. Maybe a little of both is true.

And also, since men obviously do not think like women, how upset can I really be with a guy for not getting it?

My struggle is that I like for things to make sense and I get so annoyed when they don't and/ or when the information I want is not readily available to me.

And the greatest irony of all this is how complicated you men make things by not being complicated.
Way to go guys!
:dizzy :dizzy :dizzy

:lol

[MrChug]

The author should have included a rule about how guys saying " I'll call" does not necessarily mean they will.

Because EVERYONE knows, a girl would so much rather a guy say he is going to call and then NOT instead of just being truthful upfront that he has no intention of phoning. :rolleyes

My thought is that (and I'm quite guilty of this...):

If you're worried about the guy calling, shouldn't you invest a bit more time to ensure that the investment in ***** you gave away is going to have a return????

[TDMVPDPOY]

i like to tell my future wife or future gf grab me a beer when i want one, and when i want one, i mean i want it now, not 5mins later...oh fix me a sandwich while ur at it

[MrChug]

i like to tell my future wife or future gf grab me a beer when i want one, and when i want one, i mean i want it now, not 5mins later...oh fix me a sandwich while ur at it

Good luck with that whole "when I find a girl who'll like me and accept my views and do as I say" thing...











REALLY... :donkey

[2centsworth]

IMO, if a guy is into you he won't wait more than 8hrs to call you. I don't think I waited more than 3 hours to call my now wife. Before that, I used to not call in forever.

[TDMVPDPOY]

IMO, if a guy is into you he won't wait more than 8hrs to call you. I don't think I waited more than 3 hours to call my now wife. Before that, I used to not call in forever.

you can always divert calls to someone randomly

[MannyIsGod]

:lol @ the toilet seat debate. My best friends wife would always get pissed at me when I went over and didn't put it down. Jess has never bothered me about it, though.

I have told girls in the past that I would call them later with no intention of calling them ever again. Sorry, but as psycho as some girls are (and this goes both ways but I never dated men) there is no way I'd tell one that I wasn't calling; especially when asked right out.

Good luck to all you single people. Dating is nuts.

[ploto]

Seems to me if it is really going well, you are making plans for the next date before the night is even over, and no one is waiting for a phone call.