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Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
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Kevin Garnett is not particularly charming. He's as cuddly as a cactus. Garnett is so intense it sometimes seems he has blood vessels the size of garden hoses. Before the seventh game of a 2004 playoff series against the Kings, Garnett noted that the game would be war, adding, "I'm sitting in the house loading up the pump; I'm loading up the Uzi; I've got a couple of M-16s." The assembled reporters nervously chuckled, mostly sure Garnett was kidding. Mostly.
Garnett is under no obligation to be a softie. His job is to play basketball, and no one on the planet is better at that than Garnett, a player envied by shooting guards (for his athleticism) and centers (for his height) alike. He has been in the prime of his career for the past three years, averaging 23.1 points (on better than 50 percent shooting), 13.6 rebounds and 5.6 assists during that span. The only thing that has kept him from widespread recognition is the Timberwolves' failure to put a championship-caliber team around him, thanks to some managerial fumbles (most notably the Joe Smith fiasco). Judging by the current shape of Minnesota's roster, Garnett's ringlessness is not about to change.
This week, after four years on the job, I am packing up my NBA media guides and changing my role. I'm not leaving the Sporting News, of course -- who else would have me? -- but I'll be handling different stories and no longer will be on the pro hoops beat. That's what has me thinking about Garnett.
Of all the things I wish I had seen in the four short years I handled this beat, No. 1 is Garnett winning an NBA championship. Oh, but I have a whole list of other things.
2. Jerry Sloan clones on every bench. It is one of the great mysteries of my profession that Sloan has managed to coach in Utah for 17 years without being voted Coach of the Year. He has a system and demands every player stay within it, contract size or draft position be darned (which, believe me, is not the word Sloan would use). Sloan has the luxury of job security, which enables him to coach his way, but it sure would be nice if every coach in the league took the same approach.
3. The Jerry Buss girlfriend calendar. At Staples Center, it's always fun to have a peek at whichever wonder of modern cosmetic surgery the good doctor is sitting with. Why not put them in calendar form?
4. Tim Duncan, ratings star. Ours is a country that extols the virtues of hard work and humility. But we don't like to watch those virtues on TV. Duncan is a magnificent player with three championships and career averages of 22.5 points and 12.2 rebounds. He is also, basically, a dork :rolleyes . Duncan once was so upset over a call by referee Dick Bavetta that he bet Bavetta a hamburger he had blown the call. A hamburger! Because Duncan does not so much as jaywalk, fans don't tune in to watch him.
5. Larry Bird, a Celtic again. Danny Ainge is doing an excellent job running the Boston organization. He has added youth and created a style that defines the Celtics. But, deep down, every Celtics fan knows it should be Bird calling the shots.
6. Being Jeff Van Gundy. Why doesn't this guy have a reality show -- just about Van Gundy doing everyday things? Something would go annoyingly wrong at every turn, causing Van Gundy to furrow his brow in frustration, like Paul Giamatti in American Splendor. Think of the possibilities: Jeff Van Gundy watches game film, and the VCR starts eating the tape. Jeff Van Gundy is out mowing the lawn, and his shoelace gets stuck in the blade. Jeff Van Gundy goes for a haircut and must listen to the barber drop a string of jokes along the lines of, "Well, this shouldn't take very long!" Hilarious.
7. The Charles Oakley Celebrity Poker Bonanza. OK, another reality show. But the best part of an Oakley poker tournament would be watching Chuck collect his winnings from the losers after the tourney. Ask Tyrone Hill how that would feel.
8. The Bulls playing out the string. One of the great things about the NBA from 1980-98 was the cycle of dynasties -- the Celtics, then the Lakers, then the Pistons, then the Bulls. One of the pleasures was watching the new dynasty lose to the old a few times before finally toppling it and winning a championship. But we never got to see that with the Bulls, never got to see the transition from a Bulls dynasty to a Lakers dynasty. That was a blow to the league.
Sean Deveney is a staff writer for Sporting News. E-mail him at [email protected]
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
That is misleading.
Tim Duncan actually said "I'll bet you anything that wasnt the right call"
and the ref said "I dont bet money, I don't bet"
Duncan was like "well what will you bet"
and he was like "A hamburger"
then duncan was like "Okay I'll bet you a hamburger that wasnt the right call"
If thats all they can come up with to diss duncan then he's about to have a monster year...
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
I think "goober" might be more accurate.
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
Sean Deveney, the accidental journalist.
Can't you just picture Tim saying...
"I know you are but what am I?
or
standing at CiCi's Pizza counter and yelling "Hi, welcome to CiCi's!!!!!!!! heheheheh"
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
I don't think he meant it as an insult... He's saying he wishes Duncan captured the public's interest.
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kori Ellis
rofl he looks like useruser666
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
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Sean Deveney, the accidental journalist.
:lmao
Quote:
rofl he looks like useruser666
preparing for the wrath of Spurswoman in 5....4....3.... :lol
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
I don't think Deveney meant it as an insult. I think he was merely stating a wide public opinion. A lot of people think probably think Tim is not very "cool." The way he talks, laughs, claps his hands ... I mean, he is kind of a geek.
That takes nothing away from him as a basketball player. He is the best power forward to have played the game of basketball EVER. He is a perennial all-star, multiple MVP, and world champion.
Deveney's comment was more to the point that it's sad that not more people outside of San Antonio appreciate what Tim Duncan is doing in his career because he is a little bland. And, I agree. More people should try to watch Tim Duncan more and appreciate how great a basketball player he is.
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
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I don't think Deveney meant it as an insult. I think he was merely stating a wide public opinion. A lot of people think probably think Tim is not very "cool."
I agree that's what he was doing.
But Deveney has written so much crap about the Spurs in the last few years, (i.e. Accidental Champions) that people are quick to point out when he says something.
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
Like Huey Lewis said
"It's hip to be square"
I hope duncan starts wearing a mask or glasses and gets buck teeth so it'll look even funnier when he totally owns someone like Shaq or Ben Wallace
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
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Originally Posted by Cant_Be_Faded
Like Huey Lewis said
"It's hip to be square"
I hope duncan starts wearing a mask or glasses and gets buck teeth so it'll look even funnier when he totally owns someone like Shaq or Ben Wallace
Hahaha! And after each play he'll say, " Did I do that?" :lol
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
Far be it from to defend this piece of media dung but the tone of the article is stuff he'd like to see, as in Tim Duncan getting more attention for his game.
Again, who cares?
Three in seven, mofos!
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
That a-hole and the rest of the Sporting news can go to hell.
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
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Originally Posted by samikeyp
preparing for the wrath of Spurswoman in 5....4....3.... :lol
Actually....he kind of does, only a not-so-chubby head and blonde.....and waaaaay less dorky. :wow :lol
And they have something else in common, too.....they've both responded to me when I've *talked* to them. :spin
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
Betting a hamburger and it being trashed by a FORMER-NBA journalist.
I'm sorry but I'm one of those people that think saying "I'll bet you a hamburger", is much more acceptable for the youth to model themselves after moreless here, rather than "What the F ref GDit", or "BULLSHITOHHHHH", and numerous other things.
Anybody see where this is going?
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
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Originally Posted by Cant_Be_Faded
I hope duncan starts wearing a mask or glasses and gets buck teeth so it'll look even funnier when he totally owns someone like Shaq or Ben Wallace
YOMANK!! :lmao :lmao
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
Perhaps we aren't really defining "Dork" properly. Where's Mr. Dictionary when you need him?
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
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Originally Posted by Brutalis
I'm sorry but I'm one of those people that think saying "I'll bet you a hamburger", is much more acceptable for the youth to model themselves after moreless here, rather than "What the F ref GDit", or "BULLSHITOHHHHH", and numerous other things.
Anybody see where this is going?
haha good point
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
Well, I'm not Mr. Dictionary...but I should at least get a little credit for my grammar anal-retentiveness... :lol
2 entries found for dork.
dork ( P ) Pronunciation Key (dôrk)
n.
1. Slang. A stupid, inept, or foolish person: “the stupid antics of America's favorite teen-age cartoon dorks” (Joshua Mooney).
2. Vulgar Slang. The penis.
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
Well, there you go, then. I'd say Sean Deveney is spot-on, as usual. I can see his point. :rolleyes
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
New VISA Commercial:
Being called a dork in a "Weekly Reader" 3.50
Betting a ref a Hamburger...(potentially) 7.00
Wearing three rings and holding up the Finals MVP trophies...PRICELESS
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
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Originally Posted by SpursWoman
Actually....he kind of does, only a not-so-chubby head and blonde.....and waaaaay less dorky. :wow :lol
:lol told you
when i first saw the picture in my off-centered vision i thought kori was scoffing user
i was like wha-whaaaat
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
Heck, how many dorks you know got 3 rings and 3 MVPs? TD looks cool with those rings!
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
I think he was going for more of the "nerd" connotation of dork.
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
Duncan IS a dork. It's the truth.
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
Thank God that TSN finally figured out this dipshit knows ZIP about hoops, and is re-assigning him. Dave D'Allesandro (TSN's previous NBA beat writer) wrote circles around this clown.
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
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Originally Posted by tlongII
Duncan IS a dork. It's the truth.
Duncan HAS 3 rings...It's the truth!
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
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Originally Posted by Kori Ellis
He looks like Samwise the hobbit to me. Maybe Sean Astin is moonlighting as a sportwriter. :)
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
:lmao @ he looks like User.
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
:lmao I actually that that was a funny reponse by Tim....
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
I wouldn't mind being a dork with three rings than look cool with nothing to show for it.
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
he's a dork with real bling!!!
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
A dork is a whale's penis. That's what it says in my Webster's dictionary.
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
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Originally Posted by Cant_Be_Faded
rofl he looks like useruser666
:lol Except Useruser666 is MUCH cooler
:)
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
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Originally Posted by ALVAREZ6
A dork is a whale's penis. That's what it says in my Webster's dictionary.
So...........you're a dork too? :angel
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
tim duncan
is a dungeon & dragons addict
likes to be called Merlin
owns alot of knives and decorative swords
fav. hobbie is video games.
uhm. yes he is a dork.
But we love him :makeout anyway - since he;s also the best PF ever and had 3 rings, 2 MVP's and 3 finals MVP's.
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
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Originally Posted by hussker
New VISA Commercial:
Being called a dork in a "Weekly Reader" 3.50
Betting a ref a Hamburger...(potentially) 7.00
Wearing three rings and holding up the Finals MVP trophies...PRICELESS
Actually, Tim won that bet. :lol There was an excerpt about it from Bavetta's book. The next time he ref'd a game in SA, he drove through McDonald's and picked up a happy meal for Tim. He had a towel boy take it to Tim in the locker room and when Tim came out on the floor he said something like "I'm eating good tonight!"
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
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Originally Posted by tlongII
Duncan IS a dork. It's the truth.
At it again Charlie Murphy.
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
^darkness everyone darkness is here
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
Aren't all geniuses considered dorks?
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
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Originally Posted by nkdlunch
Aren't all geniuses considered dorks?
fucking ay!
stephan hawking is a huge dork. he loves star trek (so do I :angel) - he was even guest star one episode.
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
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Originally Posted by ObiwanGinobili
tim duncan
is a dungeon & dragons addict
likes to be called Merlin
owns alot of knives and decorative swords
fav. hobbie is video games.
uhm. yes he is a dork.
I think in the pantheon of name-calling, Duncan is more of a "geek" than a "dork." "Dork" implies something more like social ineptitude, a la Kwame Brown.
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
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Originally Posted by hussker
New VISA Commercial:
Being called a dork in a "Weekly Reader" 3.50
Betting a ref a Hamburger...(potentially) 7.00
Wearing three rings and holding up the Finals MVP trophies...PRICELESS
More like Highlights for Children Sports. :lol
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
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Originally Posted by Extra Stout
I think in the pantheon of name-calling, Duncan is more of a "geek" than a "dork." "Dork" implies something more like social ineptitude, a la Kwame Brown.
Kwame Brown strikes me as more of a "loser" or "tard" personally.
but yeah.. I'd give TD "geek".
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
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Originally Posted by 1Parker1
So...........you're a dork too? :angel
I guess so...
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
I think if Duncan was in the spotlight more it would really help the self esteem of many of the nerds, dorks, and weenies in the world. Look kids, it is possible to be a fan of D&D, video games, and Merlin and not be a social pariah! Just hit the gym and work on a bank shot.
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
he's the King of all Dorks and we're all dorklings!
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
I think it's pretty dorky to be sweating in your file photo.
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
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Originally Posted by Summers
Actually, Tim won that bet. :lol There was an excerpt about it from Bavetta's book. The next time he ref'd a game in SA, he drove through McDonald's and picked up a happy meal for Tim. He had a towel boy take it to Tim in the locker room and when Tim came out on the floor he said something like "I'm eating good tonight!"
Hahaha! That is great.
I have never thought Tim was a nerd or anything remotely like that. Timmy's my type of people- a peculiar treasure. = )
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
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Originally Posted by Sportcamper
TD might be a dork. But this man would piss his pants before calling him a dork to his face :lol
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
i don't normally say this but.. i refuse to accept that timmy is a "dork" so.. fuck him to hell..!!
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
He can't diss D-Rob, cause he knows God will strike him down with a bolt of lightening. Next best thing? Insult Tim Duncan for engaging in the gambling of a hamburger. Tim Duncan, not a bad boy, not a thug? I though gambling was one of those seven deadly sins. Surely this will add some edge to such a Dork? I always though a Dork was someone that use ignorance in place of logic to define the world around him. You might want to look in the mirror Mr. Denevey.
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Re: Deveney: Duncan "a dork"
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Originally Posted by Kori Ellis
:lmao