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  1. #1
    Student of Liberty Galileo's Avatar
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    Obama died and met our Founding Fathers

    When Obama died, George Washington met him at the Pearly Gates. He slapped him across the face and yelled, "How dare you try to destroy the Nation I helped conceive?"

    Patrick Henry approached, punched him in the nose and shouted, "You wanted to end our liberties but you failed."

    James Madison followed, kicked him in the groin and said, "This is why I allowed our government to provide for the common defense!"

    Thomas Jefferson was next, beat Obama with a long cane and snarled, "It was evil men like you who inspired me to write the Declaration of Independence."

    The beatings and thrashings continued as George Mason, James Monroe and 66 other early Americans unleashed their anger on the radical, socialist, leader.

    As Obama lay bleeding and in pain, an Angel appeared. Obama wept and Said, "This is not what you promised me." The Angel replied, "I told you there would be 72 VIRGINIANS waiting for you in Heaven. What did you think I said?"....."You really need to listen when someone is trying to tell you something!"

    http://www.trapshooters.com/cfpages/...Yes&SortBy=ASC


  2. #2
    Believe. The Cougar's Avatar
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    bah there's a reason our pres was supposed to be elected by an elite electoral college

  3. #3
    Alleged Michigander ChumpDumper's Avatar
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    James Madison said "I owned a bunch of people who looked like you never set them free."

  4. #4
    dangerous floater Winehole23's Avatar
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    At bottom, the joke is a *patriotic* death fantasy about Obama getting an Old Dominion style comeuppance in heaven.

    George Washington apparently pacified his outraged honor with a mere face slap. Patrick Henry with a punch in the nose. The next two slave owners in line indulged their taste for violent assault, which soon became the general trend according to the joke, in a (joke) heaven where the angels -- erstwhile Virginians -- ventilate hatred and visit the (funny, ha ha) pains of on Obama within spitting distance of (joke, ha ha) heaven. That's telling on a lot of levels...
    Last edited by Winehole23; 04-18-2010 at 05:26 AM.

  5. #5
    dangerous floater Winehole23's Avatar
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    My question is, what happens after the 72 Virginians penalize Obama? Has Obama inadvertently been admitted to heaven? Did the angel say:

    72 Virginians will be waiting up on you at the gates of heaven...
    Or did he say:

    ...in heaven?
    Last edited by Winehole23; 04-23-2010 at 03:01 PM.

  6. #6
    Who the Fuck are Man Utd?
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    "see wtf i did, sigh." said Abraham Lincoln, face palmed...

  7. #7
    Student of Liberty Galileo's Avatar
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    The sad reality is that we know more about the childhoods, youth, and education of most of our Founding Fathers, than we do about Obama.

  8. #8
    Believe. admiralsnackbar's Avatar
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    The sad reality is that we know more about the childhoods, youth, and education of most of our Founding Fathers, than we do about Obama.

  9. #9
    Veteran jack sommerset's Avatar
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    Jefferson put a long hair wig on Obama and ed him.

  10. #10
    Veteran
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    "we know more about the childhoods, youth, and education of most of our Founding Fathers, than we do about Obama."

    You Lie.

    The FFs are obscured in hagiographic myth-making. Like every religion has its creation myths, all tribes and countries have their ancestor/founding myths.

    eg, the Boston Tea Party was against the tea-monopolizing East India Company, not against the King, and was agitated for by the wealthy colonialists/merchants. ie, the moneyed merchants and capitalists agitated for the insurrection, just like the corps and capitalists are duping the teabaggers today, to distract from the culpability of the corps and capitalists from ing up America.

    "Even with the Townshend duty in effect, the Tea Act would allow the East India Company to sell tea more cheaply than before, undercutting the prices offered by smugglers."

    "The protest movement that culminated with the Boston Tea Party was not a dispute about high taxes. The price of legally imported tea was actually reduced by the Tea Act of 1773."

    "Colonial merchants, some of them smugglers, played a significant role in the protests. Because the Tea Act made legally imported tea cheaper, it threatened to put smugglers of Dutch tea out of business"

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boston_tea_party

  11. #11
    Student of Liberty Galileo's Avatar
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    "we know more about the childhoods, youth, and education of most of our Founding Fathers, than we do about Obama."

    You Lie.

    The FFs are obscured in hagiographic myth-making. Like every religion has its creation myths, all tribes and countries have their ancestor/founding myths.

    eg, the Boston Tea Party was against the tea-monopolizing East India Company, not against the King, and was agitated for by the wealthy colonialists/merchants. ie, the moneyed merchants and capitalists agitated for the insurrection, just like the corps and capitalists are duping the teabaggers today, to distract from the culpability of the corps and capitalists from ing up America.

    "Even with the Townshend duty in effect, the Tea Act would allow the East India Company to sell tea more cheaply than before, undercutting the prices offered by smugglers."

    "The protest movement that culminated with the Boston Tea Party was not a dispute about high taxes. The price of legally imported tea was actually reduced by the Tea Act of 1773."

    "Colonial merchants, some of them smugglers, played a significant role in the protests. Because the Tea Act made legally imported tea cheaper, it threatened to put smugglers of Dutch tea out of business"

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boston_tea_party
    Name even one myth regarding James Madison that occurs in the history books. Just one.

    The real NWO agenda is to tear down the Founding Fathers with bull .


  12. #12
    The Sean Marks Dance Duff McCartney's Avatar
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    Name even one myth regarding James Madison that occurs in the history books. Just one.

    The real NWO agenda is to tear down the Founding Fathers with bull .

    I can name one of all the founding fathers. They never believed all men are created equal, or maybe they did...they just never saw blacks as real men.

  13. #13
    Student of Liberty Galileo's Avatar
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    I can name one of all the founding fathers. They never believed all men are created equal, or maybe they did...they just never saw blacks as real men.
    Show me where it says Madison said that, or are you just talking out of your ass. The British and the Dutch started the discrimination, and the Americans ended it.

  14. #14
    Believe. admiralsnackbar's Avatar
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    Show me where it says Madison said that, or are you just talking out of your ass. The British and the Dutch started the discrimination, and the Americans ended it.
    Americans ended it, but not the founders. Sorry, Charlie -- he got you.

    And exactly what is it that you don't know about Obama? We know where he was born, where he went to school, where and how he's lived, worked, worshiped.

    If you're a birther, it's because you don't accept the evidence, not because the evidence doesn't exist... in the same way I imagine you don't accept evidence for anything that flies in the face of your assumptions about seemingly every event in modern history... which I guess raises the question: what kind of evidence do you require to convince you that you may be wrong?

  15. #15
    Student of Liberty Galileo's Avatar
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    The Founders banned slavery in the Nortwest territory at a time when slavery was legal almost everywhere else in the world. In 1787, the Confederation congress did this.

    The NW territory is huge, covering the land of Ohio, Indiana, Michigan, Wisconsin, and Minnesota.

    You don't know about history. Then later, many of the Founders helped get rid of slavery in the northern states when it was still legal all over the world.

    You ignored my James Madison challenge as well.

    FAIL.

  16. #16
    lol banned DUNCANownsKOBE2's Avatar
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    Name even one myth regarding James Madison that occurs in the history books. Just one.

    The real NWO agenda is to tear down the Founding Fathers with bull .


    You have no proof it's a myth. Some bat crazy conspiracy theory you read somewhere can't be interpreted as fact.

    One day, someone like Galileo will find himself in control of nuclear weapons. I just hope that day comes after I die.

  17. #17
    Student of Liberty Galileo's Avatar
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    You have no proof it's a myth. Some bat crazy conspiracy theory you read somewhere can't be interpreted as fact.

    One day, someone like Galileo will find himself in control of nuclear weapons. I just hope that day comes after I die.
    You hate America.


  18. #18
    2nd Verse Same as the 1st Oh, Gee!!'s Avatar
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    hey, that a really @!#!* funny joke. ha-ha. guffaw. *spits milk out of his nose*

  19. #19
    Believe. admiralsnackbar's Avatar
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    The Founders banned slavery in the Nortwest territory at a time when slavery was legal almost everywhere else in the world. In 1787, the Confederation congress did this.

    The NW territory is huge, covering the land of Ohio, Indiana, Michigan, Wisconsin, and Minnesota.

    You don't know about history. Then later, many of the Founders helped get rid of slavery in the northern states when it was still legal all over the world.

    You ignored my James Madison challenge as well.

    FAIL.
    Do you even know how to read? "We hold these truths to be self-evident: that all men are created equal." That doesn't apply to the Northwest territories, that applies to everywhere. Unless it doesn't.

    And I don't pretend to know much about Madison, but a cursory googleization of the question yields:

    MYTH: James Madison said, "We have staked the whole of our political ins utions upon the capacity of mankind for self-government, upon the capacity of each and all of us to govern ourselves, to control ourselves, to sustain ourselves according to the Ten Commandments of God."
    FACT: This quote appears nowhere in the writings of Madison. It was debunked years ago by Madison scholars and even many Religious Right leaders have admitted that the quote can't be substantiated. This inaccurate Madison Ten Commandments quote was circulated among the Religious Right chiefly by David Barton, a Texas man who peddles a revisionist history arguing that the United States was founded as a "Christian nation." In 1996, Barton admitted that the quote is bogus and recommended that people stop using it.

    http://www.gainesvillehumanists.org/myths.htm


    That answered, what exactly is it that you don't know about Obama just so we're all clear.

  20. #20
    dangerous floater Winehole23's Avatar
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    The (joke) heaven in the OP bears a superficial resemblance to that of Tertullian (sic? ES?), which is separated from by a low wall where angels loiter, watching the torments of the damned.

    Only in this case the angels go over the wall to participate. I guess it wouldn't really be a sweet, sweet heaven if you were forbidden to torture your enemies.
    Last edited by Winehole23; 04-24-2010 at 06:03 AM.

  21. #21
    dangerous floater Winehole23's Avatar
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    One day, someone like Galileo will find himself in control of nuclear weapons.
    Very, very low on this wino's list of worries.

  22. #22
    Damn The Man Mr. Peabody's Avatar
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    Oh . . . I get it . . . because he's a Muslim . . . Well-played sir, well-played indeed.

  23. #23
    Student of Liberty Galileo's Avatar
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    Do you even know how to read? "We hold these truths to be self-evident: that all men are created equal." That doesn't apply to the Northwest territories, that applies to everywhere. Unless it doesn't.

    And I don't pretend to know much about Madison, but a cursory googleization of the question yields:

    MYTH: James Madison said, "We have staked the whole of our political ins utions upon the capacity of mankind for self-government, upon the capacity of each and all of us to govern ourselves, to control ourselves, to sustain ourselves according to the Ten Commandments of God."
    FACT: This quote appears nowhere in the writings of Madison. It was debunked years ago by Madison scholars and even many Religious Right leaders have admitted that the quote can't be substantiated. This inaccurate Madison Ten Commandments quote was circulated among the Religious Right chiefly by David Barton, a Texas man who peddles a revisionist history arguing that the United States was founded as a "Christian nation." In 1996, Barton admitted that the quote is bogus and recommended that people stop using it.

    http://www.gainesvillehumanists.org/myths.htm


    That answered, what exactly is it that you don't know about Obama just so we're all clear.
    No modern, well researched biography on Madison uses that quote.

    Show me one that does.

    All modern well researched biographies are sourced and that quote has no source.

  24. #24
    Believe. admiralsnackbar's Avatar
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    No modern, well researched biography on Madison uses that quote.

    Show me one that does.

    All modern well researched biographies are sourced and that quote has no source.
    Keep shifting the goalposts, buddy.

    Meanwhile, you haven't answered my question.

  25. #25
    Student of Liberty Galileo's Avatar
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    Keep shifting the goalposts, buddy.

    Meanwhile, you haven't answered my question.
    All you do is beat the strawman.

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