This is not as laughable as you seem to think.
Jesus understood the truth in that material things are transitory and meaningless in the end. You can't take it with you, and God doesn't give a rat's ass how much you are worth at the end of your life, merely that you were good and decent while living.
That said:
You have sadly, once again, missed the underlying concept. Not only that you have tried to set up a straw man. Sorry, I ain't gonna let you get away with that logical fallacy.
Jesus understood intuitively what you do not: "marginal income".
What the rich gave meant little to them. They had what they needed to live and thrive and then some. They gave of this excess.
There is an income level for any country at any time at which you have all the food, shelter, clothing that you need to physically survive. Beyond this point, you are going to add things that are not 100% necessary for sustaining life. Any income earned over that is "marginal", that is you will not be buying shoes , or enough food, you will be buying better shoes, better food, better shelter.
This is what progressive income taxes are based on. People making substantially more than they need to survive are taxed based on this concept.