Gimmick No. 3: Otherworldly assets.
Look at Wells’s Dec. 31 balance sheet, and you’ll see a $109.8 billion line item called “other assets.” What’s in that number? For that breakdown, you need to go to a footnote in Wells’s financial statements. And here’s where it gets comical.
The footnote says the largest component was a $44.2 billion bucket that Wells labeled as “other.” Yes, that’s right:
The biggest portion of “other assets” was “other.” 
And what did this include? The disclosure didn’t say. Neither would Bernard.
Talk about a black box. That $44.2 billion is more than Wells’s tangible common equity, even using the bank’s dodgy number. And we don’t have a clue what’s in there.