Don't ever call her again?
So, here's the scenario. When I was in Okinawa I went out with the same girl for two years. We had a wonderful relationship - honest, trusting, fun - but we broke up when I moved back to Oz and she moved to San Francisco to study. That was about a year ago. Although the end was a little messy, we have remained in contact and are good friends.
I was going to stay with her for a few days in SF during my impending trip to the US, with no thoughts other than to have some fun with a friend and finally close off my feelings for her. I don't have strong feelings any more, but at the same time I never really got full closure either. I figured seeing her would enable me to finally say goodbye properly.
Today she told me that she has a new boyfriend, and that the three of us will have to hang out together. I don't have a problem with her boyfriend, that's up to her, but at the same time I'm not going there to hang out with her new guy. That just sounds like a recipe for disaster.
What would you do?
BTW, any of you live in SF or region?
Don't ever call her again?
Have dinner with them one night but stay somewhere else. Seeing her happy with another dude will be all the closure you'll be able to stand.
I used to live on Okinawa.
Hope that helps.
(j/k, I agree with Chump.)
Oh, and if it's at all possible, have sex with someone else in California before you see them. Take her to the dinner with you.
Or him, whatever.
When in Rome.....
gaylord forum.
I agree with Chump, and definitely do not stay there. Sucks that hotel prices are ridiculous in SF.
The XYZ bar at the W Hotel had some smokin women the last time I was in SF.
3some man
wtf were you doin in okinawa anyway?? u sex any japanese chicks?
Chump's got some great advice there.
What is closure anyway? Why does everyone need closure..
I taught English in a senior HS in Oki. The only person I slept with over there was her (she's Okinawan), although I got plenty of offers... Japanese women love foreign guys, it's not an urban myth. Foreign guys tend to treat them like human beings, as opposed to many Japanese men who treat them like chattels.
I think I'll meet up with her alone for a meal on the 31st and that will be that. I'm tossing up whether to stay in SF for NYE or get out of town...
After that, I will hop in my 2006 Mustang and get the fvck out of dodge. I'm thinking the Napa Valley for a night, up to the Redwood National Park, then back along the coast down to Big Sur. I have 5 nights and I like to drive.![]()
As for the sex part, that would be great although I've never been a pick-up guy. I'm sure there are plenty of guys who might like to pick me up in SF, but I'm not gay, so that kills that...
Shoogar - u military? Where did you live, and when? Is there really a bar called the XYZ, or were you inferring that SF is full of hot chicks?![]()
Last edited by RuffnReadyOzStyle; 12-13-2006 at 01:57 AM.
"Closure", wanky term that it is, just means being fully over someone emotionally.
I'm 99.99% of the way there with her, and I think seeing her one last time will probably make that 100%. We finished our relationship over long distance on the phone, so it's time to say goodbye in person.
If you hadn't already worked it out, and despite my demeanor in the political forum, I'm the sensitive type* when it comes to women, curse it all!
*ie. a sucker! What can you do?![]()
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That's cool.. I don't mean to pick on you. I was just honestly wondering if anyone ever really finds 'closure'.
I was an Army brat. My dad was stationed there in the late 60s (I was in first grade), and I have one sister who was born there.
Yes, there really is an XYZ bar in the W Hotel in SF, and it's pretty cool. Its right across the street from the Moscone Convention Center, so if you happen to be in that part of town at night, stop in.
Closure = bumpin' uglies one last time.
Denial isn't pretty. Man up and meet the guy she's screwing now. Sounds harsh but it will really help in the long run.I think I'll meet up with her alone for a meal
Then go to Reno for New Year's Eve and really celebrate a new beginning.
i am originally from the bay if that counts for anything
...and in roll the trolls...
CD, I know what you are saying, but I'm not in denial. She's been going out with him for a couple of weeks. She hardly knows him, so why should I meet him? Also, they are in the honeymoon phase... eeeuck. I really don't need to see that.
I'll go and say hi, have a chat, say g'bye, and that's that. I've realised in thinking about this today that I'm not hung up on her any more. , I'm single and about to go on the road for 6 weeks doing everything I love, and then back to uni for 4 years... things couldn't be much better!
Our lives have diverged, and it'll be nice to be able to say goodbye to her in person. But other than that, where's my interest in trying to involve myself in her life again? Time for us to tread our seperate paths for a while. We are friendsw to the core of our beings, and I'm sure we'll catch up one day, but right now we have little to offer each other but the past.
Anyone got suggestions about where to go in SF on NYE (what's the "going out" part of town called - not the tourist areas like Fisherman's Wharf, the real SF nightlife)??? If not, I think I'll
hit the XYZ!![]()
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