wants a raise

[ObiwanGinobili]

I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for

the following reasons:

1. I do physical labor.

2. I work at great depths.

3. I plunge head first into everything I do.

4. I do not get weekends or public holidays off.

5. I work in a damp environment.

6. I work in a dark area that has poor ventilation.

7. I work in high temperatures.


Dear Penis,

After assessing your request, and considering the
arguments you have raised, the management denies your
request for the following reasons:

1. You do not work 8 hours straight.

2. You WORK IN SHORT SPURTS AND fall asleep after EACH

brief work period.

3. You do not always follow the orders of the

management team.

4. You do not stay in your designated area, and are

often seen visiting other locations.

5. You do not take initiative - you need to be

pressured and stimulated in order to start working.

6. You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of

your shift.

7. You don't always observe necessary safety

regulations, such as wearing the correct protective clothing.

8. You will retire LONG before you are 65.

9. You are unable to work double shifts.

10. You sometimes leave your designated work area

before you have completed the assigned task.

11. And if that were not all, you have constantly been

seen entering and exiting the workplace carrying two

su ious-looking bags.

Sincerely, The Management

[50 cent]

Welcome to 1996.

[1369]

wants a raise?

Lose the balck bar.

[DarkReign]

Welcome to 1996.

So what? I thought it was hilarious.

[ObiwanGinobili]

wants a raise?

Lose the balck bar.

1369.. the only club poster to yet discover the magical workings of Velcro.

[Mr. Dictionary]

Vel·cro
Trademark.
a brand of fastening tape consisting of opposing pieces of fabric, one with a dense arrangement of tiny nylon hooks and the other with a dense nylon pile, that interlock when pressed together, used as a closure on garments, luggage, etc., in place of buttons, zippers, and the like.

Dictionary.com Unabridged (v 1.1)
Based on the Random House Unabridged Dictionary, © Random House, Inc. 2006.

Velcro
1960, proprietary name (Britain), from Fr. vel(ours) cro(chÈ) "hooked velvet."

Online Etymology Dictionary, © 2001 Douglas Harper

velcro
noun
1. nylon fabric used as a fastening
verb
1. fasten with velcro; "velcro the belt"

WordNet® 2.1, © 2005 Princeton University

[Mixability]

Best sig sequence ever!

Looks like the fat kid's employee got his "raise".

[1369]

1369.. the only club poster to yet discover the magical workings of Velcro.

Ha ha.

Wait, what?