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Obviously a copy/paste. Not enough grammatical errors to be Jim's words.
I received a phone call from a gorgeous ex-girlfriend who This morning called 'out-of-the-blue' to see if I was still around.
We lost track of time, chatting about the wild, romantic times we used to enjoy together.
I couldn't believe it when she asked if I'd be interested in meeting up and rekindling a little of that "old magic".
"Wow!" I was flabbergasted. "I don't know if I could keep pace with you now", I said, "I'm a bit older and a bit grayer than when you last saw me. Plus I don't really have the energy I used to have."
She just giggled and said she was sure I would "rise to the challenge".
"Yeah." I said. "Just so long as you don't mind a waistline that's a few inches wider these days! Not to mention my total lack of muscle tone...everything is sagging, my teeth are a bit yellowed and I am developing jowls like a Great Dane!"
She laughed and told me to stop being so silly. She teased me saying that tubby, gray haired, older men were cute, and she was sure I would still be a great lover.
Anyway, she giggled and said, "I've put on a few pounds myself!"
So I told her to off.
Obviously a copy/paste. Not enough grammatical errors to be Jim's words.
Obviously...I am still a stud....
That part sold you out. Ain't you a dentist?
Hate to be the bearer of bad news.
But buddy...
You may have ed up royally.
I have an old girl friend, too.
Whenever she comes into town, we get together have lunch.
When we talk on the phone, she always complains that she has put on a few pounds.
Yeah--she did.
She went from 110-115!
Women are pretty sensitive. Your ex may have been in the same situation and have put on 5-10 pounds.
But equally as possible--
She may have simply told you that to go along with your joke!
If you really did pass this opportunity by--
YOU MAY ED UP ROYALLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hate to be the bearer of bad news.
But buddy...
You may have ed up royally.
I have an old girl friend, too.
Whenever she comes into town, we get together have lunch.
When we talk on the phone, she always complains that she has put on a few pounds.
Yeah--she did.
She went from 110-115!
Women are pretty sensitive. Your ex may have been in the same situation and have put on 5-10 pounds.
But equally as possible--
She may have simply told you that to go along with your joke!
If you really did pass this opportunity by--
YOU MAY ED UP ROYALLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
That reply was funnier than Jim's joke....
Don't you know that Jims as full of as a Christmas turkey?
Do you mean have lunch or "have lunch"?
That reply was funnier than Jim's joke....
Don't you know that Jims as full of as a Christmas turkey?
Obviously...I am still a stud....
A legend in your own mind.......yeah baby!
There is an element of dating truth to this story.
I also will receive calls from old girlfriends periodically that I have not heard from in some time. The common factor in these calls: they usually just broke up with some guy (or had a bad fight) and they are calling up some of their old boyfriends for support and to weigh their options.
LOL you should have changed the ending!!
Obviously...I am still a stud....
Epic fail.Hate to be the bearer of bad news.
But buddy...
You may have ed up royally.
I have an old girl friend, too.
Whenever she comes into town, we get together have lunch.
When we talk on the phone, she always complains that she has put on a few pounds.
Yeah--she did.
She went from 110-115!
Women are pretty sensitive. Your ex may have been in the same situation and have put on 5-10 pounds.
But equally as possible--
She may have simply told you that to go along with your joke!
If you really did pass this opportunity by--
YOU MAY ED UP ROYALLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I had an ex-girlfriend from my freshman year of college called me last fall. She was always a high-strung, potty-mouthed hottie freak, but now she sounds as if she's slid all the way into crack- status.
She kept if we could pick up where we left off 20 years ago. She said she was planning to visit my home town in the coming weeks. I could tell she was drunk and/or high during our conversation. I told her there was a Mrs. Chopper, and she responded with "I won't tell if you won't." She told me I was the best she'd ever had, to which I responded "yeah, I hear that alot."
I tried to be as polite as I could but realized there may be no getting rid of this woman if I don't do something to finalize the situation...so I asked her for her email address.
The next day I emailed her a picture of Mrs. Chopper with Chopper Jr.
She emailed me back and said I had a beautiful wife and family, and that was the last I heard from her.
BTW, she did have fat girl voice on the phone. Actually she sounded a little like one of Marge Simpson's sisters which frightened me more than a little bit.
Did someone ask "what's fat girl voice"? It's someone struggling to speak because the cellulite in their cheeks is pressing against the sides of their mouth resulting in a slightly garbled delivery...kind of like someone drowning in a pool...of their own fat.
But these days beggars can't be choosers........
* cue 70's porn music *
I actually have a story like this except we did rekindle our relationship( oh yeah and both of us were in better shape than the first time around) and it was good for a while. However the moral of the story should be, they are an ex for a reason. The 2nd time around more than likely won't work.I received a phone call from a gorgeous ex-girlfriend who This morning called 'out-of-the-blue' to see if I was still around.
We lost track of time, chatting about the wild, romantic times we used to enjoy together.
I couldn't believe it when she asked if I'd be interested in meeting up and rekindling a little of that "old magic".
"Wow!" I was flabbergasted. "I don't know if I could keep pace with you now", I said, "I'm a bit older and a bit grayer than when you last saw me. Plus I don't really have the energy I used to have."
She just giggled and said she was sure I would "rise to the challenge".
"Yeah." I said. "Just so long as you don't mind a waistline that's a few inches wider these days! Not to mention my total lack of muscle tone...everything is sagging, my teeth are a bit yellowed and I am developing jowls like a Great Dane!"
She laughed and told me to stop being so silly. She teased me saying that tubby, gray haired, older men were cute, and she was sure I would still be a great lover.
Anyway, she giggled and said, "I've put on a few pounds myself!"
So I told her to off.
Jimcs a lesbian?
I had an ex-girlfriend from my freshman year of college called me last fall. She was always a high-strung, potty-mouthed hottie freak, but now she sounds as if she's slid all the way into crack- status.
She kept if we could pick up where we left off 20 years ago. She said she was planning to visit my home town in the coming weeks. I could tell she was drunk and/or high during our conversation. I told her there was a Mrs. Chopper, and she responded with "I won't tell if you won't." She told me I was the best she'd ever had, to which I responded "yeah, I hear that alot."
I tried to be as polite as I could but realized there may be no getting rid of this woman if I don't do something to finalize the situation...so I asked her for her email address.
The next day I emailed her a picture of Mrs. Chopper with Chopper Jr.
She emailed me back and said I had a beautiful wife and family, and that was the last I heard from her.
And I still stand by that comment today
Copypasta senses tingling...
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