Lol
Did you know that millions of people die every day?
Joey stared out the front window of his tattoo parlor hoping to manifest new customers walking in. But it was Saturday afternoon and he was the only person that walked through the door today. He stuffed his right hand down the front of his Zubaz and rubbed his gooch. Then pulled out his hand and gave it a long sniff. He thought he might take a shower later today if his hot water was working. He was only four weeks late on payment and ing Biden. It drove him nuts. Master hadn't been taking his calls so he was at a loss as how to proceed with the rest of the day and life in general. Plus those buttholes on Spurstalk were giving him grief. He daydreamed about being able to buy an AR-15 and shooting his computer screen. Why didn't Master answer his ing calls? Joey thought about taking an Uber to the Master's house but a quick look in his wallet confirmed that he couldn't afford it. Just one sleeve today...that's all I need. As if by providence, the phone rang. "Hey...Joey's tattoo parlor? Would you like a crappy tattoo?". There was a brief silence on the other end and then a robotic voice replied, "beep boop beep". Joey hung up the phone and masturbated at the thought of having a robot sex lover. No one came in for a crappy tattoo.
Lol
Did you know that millions of people die every day?
Spoiler alert: Waiting for early years details about alpha male foot to his neck.
Joey didn't recognize Chris's voice?
With Joey having coping issues associated with two alpha male dads and his IDGAF at ude on everything, he is definitely conflicted. So anything is possible, tbh.
koriwhat still Googling "manifest" so he can decide if you're a puto and you can ing die already and stop bugging him.
Chis moved to San Diego, remember?
this is a good replacement for the Judy Diary entries. SFS off to a great start in his third ST miniseries, much better than the Stan poems flop
Agreed, great start to this ST miniseries (2.5 stars out of 3 stars as he held back on trademarks "die" or "puto"), but can he pull off a spectacular second episode with so much material left unbent over?
WTF...man...I thought the Stan stuff (not the poems necessarily) had a ton of potential. In my head, I've written maybe a whole book about Stan having to deal with Russians building nuclear bombs in the U.S. It's funny as . But I'm too lazy to write it all out. Teaser...his best friend is named, "Jack Scrotum". Also, he punches out a shark. And he plays guitar and is an art expert. I have these chapters memorized. Plus while trying to deal with the Russians, he has side jobs as an assassin and trying to solve a case with Vietnamese people having their teeth unnecessarily removed by a rouge dentist.
You went too hard. You cannot saturate the market with a product still in the trial phase.
Went too hard on what? I'm not sure if you're talking about the Tattoo Chronicles or the Stan book (which will be called, "A Fistful of Stan, by Stan".)
Stan. Stan was promising but you didn't pick your spots. Live an learn bro. This one though could produce for you.
Tattoo Chronicles or Stan? Asking for a friend.
Tattoo Chronicles has all the elements for a blockbuster: intense drama, two dads, rage, comedy, high school struggles, loneliness, plenty of IDGAF (but not meaning it), masters, foots to neck, bad takes on life, job worse than shoe salesman, pretend gang member friends, hiding when confronted, regrets, and broken promises, plus calling people putos or wishing they died.
I see an Oscar for that screenplay or a Pulitzer for the book.
I guess. You guys severely underrated Stan. I'm probably too lazy to do anything anyway.
I thought Black Stan was very promising.
It was probably too erudite for most folks on ST. Here's his greatest works.....
If you like poetry, skip to the end parts.
Task Force Stan -by Stan
Chapter 1
Stan sat looking at the mirror. In the mirror there was Stan looking back at Stan. He was handsome and really strong looking. He used to be a Green Beret in the Marines in Vietnom and Korea.
He was the first black man to also fly jets in the military. Stan was responible for many covert operations and kills.
Now after those tough years he became a private detective and used his military skills to hunt down criminals that the police couldn't catch. While he was looking in the mirror, he answered the phone that just rang.
o this is Stan.
Stan, this is Mr. Johnson a detective with the Porterville Police.
This better be good. I'm about to be working on a case in France.
We have a missing child who we or the FBI can't find. We think he may be the only person in the America that can solve this Russian code.
Stan, I'm on it. Good bye. And Stan slams down the phone.
Good bye and thanks Stan says Mr. Johnson.
What's his name?
His name is Roobin Vladimer. He was adopted from Russia and went to school in Porterville.
Stan, I'm on it. Good bye.
Stan said and looked back at the mirror. Stan in the mirror looked back at Stan and nodded. And said you know what this means.
Stan stopped looking in the mirror and said Yes. Then he went and got his special military gun out of his safe in the closet in the upstairs of his manshun.
He ed the gun and went back down and shot the mirror.
Task Force Stan - by Stan
Chapter 2
Stan was late for his meeting with Johnson down at the Porterville PD. He intecommed June, who lived on the 4th floor of his mansion.
June, get the copter ready.
Stan walked into his back yard where the helicopter just landed. June his pilot was very foxy with a great body. Stan got in the helicopter.
June said where to?
To the police department.
They got in the air and while they were in the air June said to Stan : baby, why don't you want to get with me?
Stan said that my heart belongs to another
June said, it's not your heart I want
Stan smiled and then said : well come back here and show me
June got into the back seat and they had wild sex
When they got to the station, Stan parachuted down and landed on the roof and went in the door.
Mr. Johnson gave him a bunch of papers about the case and said that we're counting on you Stan
Stan said, I'm on it and without saying anything else, he got back on the helicopter.
As he was flying away, he shot the finger at Johnson.
Chapter 3
Stan decided that he would bring his sometime friend Larry in on the case. Larry was dumb as but he was good at running errands like getting food and picking up Stans champagne which he liked to have while on a case. Also Stan had a think for Larrys wife Judy. He couldn't put a finger on it but there was just something about her. It angered him sometimes about how Larry treated her. He seen her a couple of times with black eyes but he wasn't sure if Larry beat her or some other member of their crazy white family.
As the copter landed at Larry's, he could see that the car was gone. He landed anyway just to see Judy. She greeted him in the yard. The wind from the copter was making her hair all wavy like in the movies.
Hi Stan she said.
Stan gave her a smile and hug. He held on to the hug just long enough to feel himself getting hard.
Judy is Larry home?
I'm on another international case.
No Larry is at the school at his crossing guard job.
Stan made a brain note that maybe Larry had some good information about Roobin.
Thanks Judy.
Stan got in his Porsh and headed back to his mansion to look at all the paperwork and to have some lobster.
Chapter 4
Stan woke up with an itch in his head. And it wasn't the $20,000 per bottle champagne he had the night before in his mansion.
It was something bugging him. Bugging him about Larry. Larry was working as a crossing guard at Roobin's school. And he'd just put locks on his garage door from the outside
and inside. Stan thought it might be a good excuse to go see Judy.
He called down to his butler.
Quincy, call June and tell her to get the copter ready.
Yes sir. Will you be having breakfast today?
I'll have eggs sausage and whisky. Hold the eggs and sausage.
Stan looked in his mirror and wondered what the was going on. He downed his whisky and pancakes and then punched the mirror.
He called June and told her to have the copter ready. As he was flying away, he looked down and saw Quincy waving to him. He shot Quincy the finger.
He thought to himself, it's going to be a hot one today.
Chapter 5
Task Force Stan - by Stan
Stan sat in his hottub and looked in the mirror. He wasn't sure if he liked what he saw. He was a hansom man for sure. But there was something in his eyes that he hadn't seen since he was on a rescue mission for MIA's in Vietnam. No one returned but Stan. Stan punched the mirror and it broke.
As he was having more champagne in the tub he thought more about Larry and Rooben. He still had an itch in his brain. That quickly changed to his incounter with Judy. Stan had taken his Ferrari over to Larrys. Judy was impressed so Stan let Judy sit in the car while Stan did some wheelis and jumps in the neigborhood. Stan usually could control his erections but being around Judy made it get really hard.
Stan fell asleep in the hot tub with thoughts of Judy.
o Stan?
Yes
I didn’t post all Stan’s poems but these were some nominated
Pumpin Yo Son
by Stan
I could have yo but that just aint fun
This black man gonna pump yo son
The sun gonna rise when the day begun
And this black man gonna pump yo son
I ain't no but I like dem buns
of the boy in your house that you call son
he tight like an apple when I shoot my gun
he gonna scream, this man, your son
Who dat in your house
What he doin in the shower
He's showing your son
what it means, black power
He startin to cry,
he startin to howl
I'm wiping his blood
on your bathroom towel
You like dem kids, you aint no man
I'm pumpin your son, It's me...Stan.
Who Peepin
Who that peepin in yo bedroom window
Who that creepin in the bushes yo
You all alone
Is you husband home
Or is he messin round on that computer yo
Wake up and see who that is creepin
and look into those eyes that be peepin
Who that wanna make love you
It's me, Stan
Yeah... you haters. It's even better than I remembered.
I do quite appreciate that poem , a bummer we could never find Stan on Larry’s or anyones page
Who dat in your house
What he doin in the shower
He's showing your son
what it means, black power
yes it is !
I take it back SFS. The Stan material is greAt. With that said, I would love some more of the tattoo chronicles. You have a lot of great material to pull from. Plus, the Stan stuff isn’t as fun with Larry gone tbh
That’s a super good point. Kori is still here. His life is just so bland though.
Dear Tattoo Master…I woke up early and did my tattoo stretches. Then I had heavy diarrhea. I masturbate and went back to bed. No customers today.
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