The Vacant Lot
Blinded By the Light (skit begins with 4 guys playing poker)
http://www.unoriginal.com/tvl/blinded.html
Transcribed by: [email protected]
Paul: Yeah, that's what he says... So when I go on the subway, I have to blow up this inflatable donut.
Nick: Want another?
Vito: Yeah.
Rob: That's stupid.
Paul: All stupid.
Vito: One.
Nick: Oh, uh... two.
Paul: Three.
Nick: Wanna go for four?
Paul: I could if I wanted to.
Nick: Got a lot of time...
Paul: Yeah, I could if I wanted to.
Vito: Man, it *is* late... Rob?
Rob: Oh, I'm fine.
Nick, Vito and Paul: Whoo...!
Vito: Rob's lying.
Nick: Rob's bluffing.
Rob: Yeah, I'm fine...
Vito: What's the word?
[misc. muttering]
Vito: What the ?
Paul: Nothing, nothing...
[brief quiet]
Nick: [singing] Blinded by the light, held up like a loufa by the foreman of the night...
Vito: What the was that?
Nick: It's that song, Blinded by the Light.
Paul: Yeah, we know what the song it is, but what were *you* singing?
Nick:[singing] Blinded by the light...
Vito: Go on...
Nick:[singing] ...held up like a loufa by the foreman of the night.
Vito: Not what he sings.
Nick: Yes it is.
Paul: That's not what he sings.
Vito: No, it's not.
Nick: All right, what *is* he singing?
Vito:[singing] Blinded by the light, ripped up like a , you're gonna throw away the night.
Nick: I don't think so.
Vito: That's what he sings.
Nick: No it isn't.
Vito: It is.
Nick: That doesn't make any sense.
Vito: Oh, like yours makes sense.
Nick: It *does*.
Paul: Held up like a loufa?
Nick: Like a loufa... sponge.
Vito: Who's holding up the loufa sponge?
Nick: The foreman of the night.
Paul: *Why* is the "foreman of the night" holding up a loufa sponge?
Nick: Well, he's making some kinda statement, or something.
Vito: Pretty stupid statement if you ask me...
Nick: Oh, and yours makes a lot of sense...
Vito: More sense than yours...
Nick: Ripped up like a ?
Vito: Yes. A . Yes.
Paul: How do you rip up a ?
Vito: It's french. Means small French bath towel.
[Nick waves hand dismissingly]
Vito: No, no, it's obvious it's a song about a guy, lying in a gutter somewhere with nothing but this... small French bath towel, a , to protect him from the night. [singing] Blinded by the light, ripped up like a , you're gonna throw away the night.
[Paul rolls his eyes, making an exasperated face]
Nick: Okay, okay. So between my loufa sponge and your ripped up , we can agree in principle it's a song about bathing.
Vito: Okay.
Nick: Okay.
Vito: Okay.
Paul: Now you're both nuts.
Nick: Oh, what do *you* think it is?
Paul: Oh, what do I *know* it is?
Nick and Vito: What do I *know* it is?
Paul:[singing] Blinded by the light, remmed up like a dochent in the humble of the might.
Vito:What?!
Nick: *What* the was that?!
Paul: I've got the lyrics sheet at home.
Nick: Yeah, well, you got the wrong lyrics sheet, because it's blinded
Nick and Vito: by the
Nick, Vito, and Paul: light,
Nick, Vito, and Paul [each says his own]: -held up like a loufa by the foreman of the night
-ripped up like a , you're gonna throw away the night
-remmed up like a dochent in the humble of the might
[singing: ]
blinded by the light,
-held up like a loufa by the foreman of the night
-ripped up like a , you're gonna throw away the night
-remmed up like a dochent in the humble of the might
blinded by the light,
held-
ripped-
remmed-
Rob: Shut up!!! It *is*: [reciting, emphasizing each word] blinded by the light, racked up like a deuce, another roller in the night. Okay? There's no loufa sponges, there's no ripping of s, and whatever the *you* said there's none of that, alright?! That's the way the song was written, that's the way the you sing the song. You don't sing the song any other way because it wasn't *written* any other-are you laughing at me? Are you laughing? Shut up! Shut your freakin'... goof ball... Jeeerk... Jerk jerk jerk jerk jeeeerk...
[Rob storms off]
Nick, Vito, and Paul: Whoo...
Vito: Man...
Nick: *Some*body's a little hot under the colander...
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Credit to The Vacant Lot/Broadway Video
if you can look past that and not find it weird that men are dressing up like women and just realize they are playing a character, then you can see it for what it really is
Remember when they were like
okay...first you were gay...then you were slightly gay...then you were completely gay...then you were obnoxiously gay...and now you're straight???
lol
Gay dudes dressed as women?
only 1 is gay
they had to play chicks, who else would play them?...its funny how they got for playing chicks nearly 20 years ago now and it still doesnt sit straight with some people
So you didn't like Bosom Buddies, either?
Now, that I got. I watched that show (Bosom Buddies) now that I am older. KITH, I watched along time ago...it would come out at 12am...I was too young to understand it. I didn't know they still ran re-runs. I just remembered that they always dressed up as women.So you didn't like Bosom Buddies, either?
I just remembered that they always dressed up as women.
But thats like barely half the skits
I watched it as a little kid too (see original post)
I had totally forgot they played women, i mostly remembered "The Flying Pig" (LOL Bruce really was the funniest huh? I never realized that..)
And i also remembered the Sausages skit, as well as the Parachute Odd's skit.
The Parachute odd's skit....jesus, if anyone has the transcript of that, it would definitely be worth posting. Thats one of those skits you can read and have it be funny.
Now that i think about it, I wonder if they've ever released a book of the skits from KiTH??? They did it for Monty Python and for Black Adder. That would be ideal i think.
I'll look into it....could be a worthy investment.
I looked into it, and no dice.
But Black Adder sure looks nice.
Kids in the Hall *sigh* my only vice.
But Black Adder will surely suffice.
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