We're wondering: Do you worry that Dad's idea to implement a progressive price index to reduce the cost of Social Security will hurt long-term benefits for working Americans? Just kidding! Who wants another shot of Goldschläger? Whooo-hooo!
You guys sure were fun when your daddy took office. Finally: America had first daughters who could do a respectable keg stand.
The comedy began when you both got busted for underage drinking. Then, Barbara, rumor has it you slinked into a naked party at Yale. Jenna, you face-planted at a frat bash and wound up in The National Enquirer. That was awesome!
But we have to admit, as you've gotten older, those antics have worn thin. Consider that speech you guys gave at the Republican National Convention. We didn't expect FDR's "Four Freedoms," but who wrote that thing? Bijou Phillips? This was a convention speech—it sounded like it was written in the bathroom of the Hustler Club. And by the way, when are you two going to get jobs? As we're writing this, neither of you has one. Chris Klein is busier than you are.
We know the bar is low; Daddy didn't start waking up before noon until he was 40. You two could spend two decades giving each other pedicures and watching That '70s Show and still wind up president—or at least governor of Florida.
But as far as presidential spawn are concerned, you're starting to look bad. That Jan Brady-esque striver Chelsea Clinton? She went to Oxford, got a six-figure consulting job, and has already formed a political action committee for her 2024 presidential bid. Even Ron Reagan is building a respectable career as a talking head. And Amy Carter still makes the best hemp bracelets east of the Mississippi.
You need a road to respectability, girls. Here are a few suggestions to make a lasting impact.
1. Take on a cause. Your mom has literacy. Your dad has that whole world-domination thing. How about your own mission? Third World debt relief? Better health care for the poor? Bottomless margaritas at Fuddruckers?
2. Accomplish a great feat. Enough with the namby-pamby European tours. How about swimming the English Channel, climbing Mount Everest, or opening a case of Red Stripe with your butt crack? Okay, so you can already do that last one.
3. Buy a ball club. It worked for Pops. You don't even have to work on the trades or the scouting. Just go to home games, park yourselves in the box seats, and keep the twenty-four-ounce Coors coming. Voilà! "Executive experience" for the résumé.
4. Upload the Google guys. It's time for serious boyfriends, ladies. Chelsea has that wan Oxford boyfriend. Julie Nixon married an Eisenhower. How about asking out those search-engine dorks, Sergey Brin and Larry Page? They're rich, they're great at square roots, and they've got a Jacuzzi with Wi-Fi.
5. Run away. It would be the biggest cable-news story of all time. Larry King's head would explode.
So get busy, ladies. We'll be watching.
Sincerely,
GQ
P.S. You better take this seriously. We hear Gammie is getting pissed.
Men.Style.com
so they've been college grads for 1 whole year now, right?
and even with "daddy's connections" neither one has a job. pathetic.
Why don;t they volunteer for the Army, Navy or Marines???
See, you've gotta respect Chelsea Clinton on this front, chick went to school ( one where alcohol 101 is not a class) graduated near the top, and now is gainfully employed and takes care of herself.
the wgaf forum...
...along with their at udes and job aspirations, apparently.
I almost spit out pasta on the George not waking up before noon until he was 40 bit. Ah, the life of the idle rich.
A forum about the ongoing war in Iraq, government corruption and rampant political graft and cronyism, or one about Adrianne's latest personal issues, your favorite movie, and Tom Cruise getting sprayed with water? Maybe Clandestino posted this in the wrong forum? Maybe some people simply don’t give a damn about their country?
you bashing the bush daughters is ing idiotic... what the are YOU doing for your country? jack .. that is right.. why don't you post wtf you ARE NOT doing for your country...
i wouldnt call that bashing at all
and its from gq
what would you call it and who cares who wrote it...
something funny
number 1 is the only thing you could say if they did theyd DO for their country
the rest is just bull
Another girl who's private life was unfairly scrutinized (even more undeservedly so.)See, you've gotta respect Chelsea Clinton on this front, chick went to school ( one where alcohol 101 is not a class) graduated near the top, and now is gainfully employed and takes care of herself.
The bag who wrote that article in GQ needs to go back to being the little insignificant nobody that he is, and leave family members out of it.
yes!Bottomless margaritas at Fuddruckers?
Certain people have so long ago strayed from their goals that they know not the road they travel.
Liberals almost had an alcoholic in the Whitehouse too:
OH MY GOD!!!!!
is it legal to hold so many beers?????????????
what do you mean by "TOO"???Liberals almost had an alcoholic in the Whitehouse too:
BETTY FORD. she was a pill-head and an alkie.
hence the BETTY FORD CENTER.
Open Letter To Barbara and Jenna
Dear Barbara, you are so ing hot. I want you badly. Oh yeah, hi to you too Jenna.
You two are not ugly AND rich will ya'll please go out with me, look I said ya'll I speak in your language.
I'm all for keeping the personal lives of the President's (or anyone else's) family private...
But I ever bag Barbara, I promise I will posting pics and full commentary on the net.
I think this kind of crap is ridiculous...rip Bush all you want to, but his children should be left out of it.
And I felt that way about Chelsea, too. You can't choose who your parents are and what direction they take you, and don't deserve all of the unfair criticism.
HEY Captain hook
what did you mean by TOO?
i would like to know
I believe they are no longer children. That was them up there at the Republican convention doing their "Party on Wayne, Party on Garth" routine for all of America was it not? I guess they decided to give up their privacy.
Now go join the war on terror as your daddy asked other kids that weren't born with a silver spoon in their mouth to do.
1) In a perfect world, the families would be left out of it. We don't live there.
2) I might be a little indignant if they were making an effort to shield them from the press. They aren't.
Ocotillo makes a good point that I never considered... once the children are used to rally support during a presidential campaign, they lose their "leave us alone" privledges.
:throwupsp
Scott, please don't!
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