Had yesterday off. Wife thought it would be nice if I went to HEB with her.

[I. Hustle]

Well, when you've been with a girl since middle school when she was firm and tight and are around her for 20 years until she balloons and becomes entirely unattractive to any other man, you learn a thing or two about a girl.

Well if you are stuck with the same tang for the best tang getting years you must be a clingy ugly fuk and the same goes for that fat you were with

[PM5K]

I hate going to H-E-B, every time I try to jerk off in the bathroom the guy comes to clean it...

[DisgruntledLionFan#54,927]

There are a number of oddly disturbing posts in this thread.

No numbers, just a minus for the entire thread.

[mrsmaalox]

Ditto.

Confuses me, too.

Oh yes, I can see where that might confuse you. See, a lot of women don't care for anal sex, me included. But it's fine by me for you ladyboys to continue to insert whatever you please into your rectums. Whatever floats your boat

[RuffnReadyOzStyle]

She never learns. It was pretty much on from the moment we walked in the doors. We started in produce and I begun handling all the cu bers. I would say things really loud like

"I bet I know why you want cu bers"

and

"Hey hun look at how this curves to the left"

Then I went and picked out some sausage while she hit the cheese and meat butcher. She saw me from far away and I started stroking the V&V and then pretended to lick the link up and down. The look of shock was probably enough but the lady in front of her thought I was looking at her not my wife so I got a few "WTF" looks.

Then I started pining for beer.

"look hun they got Shiner black. So warm and black and wet". Then I'd run my fingers up and down the bottle while rubbing the condensation all over my face.

For the grand finale I announced all the phallic looking objects as the old checker lady ran them.

"wow those sure are some long and firm cu bers"

"look at those long black and wet bottle necks mmmmm"

"that tube of ground turkey looks so thick and meaty...you like thick and meaty don't you hun"




By the time we got to car she had her rant all ready to go

"what the is wrong with you"

"your a ing child"

"you son behaves better than you do"

"that lady thought you were sexually harassing her"

on and on.

I just laughed and then turned up the radio.

I've read a lot of your stories bragging about how much of a prick you are to your wife, and all I want to know is why you're such a ing arsehole to someone you married, and thus should respect?

[lil'mo]

Yeah lilmo you have zero jealousy.

God grow up.

Well if you are stuck with the same tang for the best tang getting years you must be a clingy ugly fuk and the same goes for that fat you were with

Look at you two schlobin on b2b's knob. I know he is your leader and all but it is possible that the person you worship is not as cool in real life as he seems on your message board, and also, his wife might be uglier and fatter than you had hoped or imagined.

[EricB]

I've read a lot of your stories bragging about how much of a prick you are to your wife, and all I want to know is why you're such a ing arsehole to someone you married, and thus should respect?

Seriously?

He's just kidding around.

His wife knows how he is and still loves him for it.

Question is why do you take the assumption that they are unhappy?

[thispego]

OMG! remove b2b's balls from your orifice! please!

[BacktoBasic's Wife]

Look at you two schlobin on b2b's knob. I know he is your leader and all but it is possible that the person you worship is not as cool in real life as he seems on your message board!!!

?? You all stink!!!

[lil'mo]

Seriously?

He's just kidding around.

His wife knows how he is and still loves him for it.

Question is why do you take the assumption that they are unhappy?

Holy ! You can NOT dog on b2b while this guy is on watch!!

[Cant_Be_Faded]

I bet B2B's wife lets him decorate her face with his bodily icing.

[EricB]

Holy ! You can NOT dog on b2b while this guy is on watch!!

Holy I can't make a post without you following me.

Find someone else to stock whacko.

[EricB]

OMG! remove b2b's balls from your orifice! please!

How adult.

[Tits McGee]

I bet B2B's wife lets him decorate her face with his bodily icing.

If EricB doesn't get there first.

[lil'mo]

Holy I can't make a post without you following me.

Find someone else to stock whacko.

Yeah, in this thread. Why are you exaggerating?

and how do you stock someone?

[lil'mo]

If EricB doesn't get there first.

No bull , he's the self-appointed keeper of b2b and mrs b2b's integrity.

[BacktoBasics]

I'm just having fun guys. Its not as if I beat her down with my fist or verbally abused her in public. You guys have no concept of how to have fun in a relationship...maybe that's why mine has lasted. You guys either take life too seriously or just get off acting like pompous s. Either way you wife is probably bored with you.

[JudynTX]

?? You all stink!!!

Worst troll ever!

[Dr. Gonzo]

I bet B2B's wife lets him decorate her face with his bodily icing.

I'd like to know the answer to this.

[BacktoBasics]

I'd like to know the answer to this.

On occasion but not as frequently as I'd like.

[I. Hustle]

Look at you two schlobin on b2b's knob. I know he is your leader and all but it is possible that the person you worship is not as cool in real life as he seems on your message board, and also, his wife might be uglier and fatter than you had hoped or imagined.

Who is talking about B2B? I'm talking about you coming out the closet and how you hate the lil' HOMo inside of you. I'm not talking about the dude that is more than likely inside you right now but the flaming that you have caged up in your mind.

[CosmicCowboy]

On occasion but not as frequently as I'd like.

Actually, I never got that part. I figured the money shot was just for porn to "prove" they really came. It never mad a damn bit of sense to me to pull out from whatever got it to that point to start with.

[BacktoBasics]

Actually, I never got that part. I figured the money shot was just for porn to "prove" they really came. It never mad a damn bit of sense to me to pull out from whatever got it to that point to start with.

Nothing says I own you like a piece of meat more than blowing a warm load all over her face.

[z0sa]

Lame jokes but I guess she is probably conditioned to laugh by now

[I. Hustle]

I would do that to the first wife all the time, but that's because I didn't really care about her. So I did it as an eff you type of thing. She took it though so I'll give her that... of course she is into chicks now.