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Kyle is slower than a tortoise on valium.
"Let's take a look at Kyle Anderson's last shot on Phantom Cam."
"We don't have that play on Phantom Cam."
"Oh...just run the replay at normal speed, then. Same thing."
Kyle is slower than a tortoise on valium.
It's impossible for Kyle Anderson to jump to his death.
Kyle's favorite place in SA is Natural Bridge Caverns...absolutely awed by those stalagmites.
Kyle Anderson shoots and releases the ball for the game winner 10 seconds before the clock finishes.
Kyle Anderson is so slow that when he grabs a defensive rebound, Patty is already all the way in the corner for a three.
Kyle Anderson's idol is the tortoise from the hare and the tortoise story
When Kyle Anderson gets pushed by someone, refs dont call a foul, cuz his fall was too slow to actually look like a legit fall.
When Kyle Anderson watches Patty Mills buzz on the court, he gets so dizzy and faints.
In those hollywood sport movies, where there is an epic slo-mo moment for a game winner, that's the same speed as Kyle Anderson in reality.
You cannot slo-mo Kyle Anderson on video, it just breaks the law of the physical universe.
Pop has to slo-mo practise tapes just for Kyle Anderson.
When Kyle Anderson scores, the announcer makes fun and calls his name for a 10 second duration.
Kyle Anderson will star in The Six Million Dollar Man movie! it will have very little editing(fast fowarding some scenes to make it look like he is actually jogging). it will run in real time. this will be a boring ass movie lasting 6 hours with an intermission.
Kyle Anderson doesn't throw the ball to pass, his teammates just furiously run up to him and grab the ball off him.
When he read the hare and the tortoise story, he got inspired and took it literally, and now moves like a tortoise for the rest of his life.
"Slow and steady" is x10 faster than what Kyle thinks "slow and steady" is.
In school when the teacher says, "Slow and steady wins the race", the classmates pointed to Kyle Anderson and said "Like him, Miss?".
The teacher replied, "Not that slow!"
Kyle Anderson is so slow , he posts a thread even though it's been posted 5 times already.
Kyle Anderson is so slow, when he gets called for flopping, the game has been over for an hour.
kyles gf asked him to take it slow....he replied "thats the only way i know how."
kyle Anderson....invented the slow clap.
Kyles gf asked him a question, by the time he replied, she had been interred.
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