What do you mean, "going after?"
First of all, you don't know that they could've stopped it.You would not be pissed at the person who could've stopped the murder of your child?
Ok
Secondly, I would spend all my energy making sure that the person who did it got what he deserved.
You seem to be spending a lot of time trying to blame others for what they could've done instead of placing the blame on the one person who actually commited the crime.
As I've said before, I would protect my family until my dying breath.
If someone hurt my child, I will make sure they hurt ten times worse.
It is. We are not discussing to what degree the man who actually kills the victim is guilty. That is pretty obvious and beyond all discussion.
Why blame people who had nothing to do with the crime?
Again, it is obviously a different kind of "blame". One that can not be prosecuted.
But, you're still placing blame.
Why is it so important for you to place blame?
Why can't you focus on the person who actually commited the crime?
I don't know for sure. What I do know, is that if they try, they have a chance of succeeding. If they stand pat, there is no chance.
Secondly, I would spend all my energy making sure that the person who did it got what he deserved.
I would too.
No, I'm not. I'm trying to make a point of why the right thing to do in these situations is to intervene.You seem to be spending a lot of time trying to blame others for what they could've done instead of placing the blame on the one person who actually commited the crime.
Unless you know the aggressor has a gun/knife/etc, the right thing to do is to try to stop him.
It is also the most difficult thing to do.
Have either of you ever had the chance to intervene in a potentially dangerous situation?
Have either of you ever had a loved one harmed in a situation in which someone else could have intervened?
If the answer to either/both of those questions is no, then this whole argument is moot. Neither of you could possibly know what you'd do or who you'd blame until it actually happens.
Where I come from, this kind of stuff happens all the time.
I've seen what happens to someone who butts into someone else's business.
I've had family members hurt by other people. We took care of it, though.
That doesn't really address either of the questions in my post, but... whatever.
I've already stated in this thread that I can understand and respect both the instinct to help someone in need, and the instinct to protect yourself (especially in the interest of taking care of your own family). I just think it's difficult for any of us to say, definitively, without question, that we know exactly what we would do without ever having been placed in this situation.
So, you are talking vigilantism (sp?).
After you said you have to protect you and yours, you would then proceed to commit a crime that you know could get you in jail or killed?
If you are going to end up dead or in jail anyways, does it matter if it was intervening to save someone or not? The potential result is the same ... your daughter would grow up without a father, yes?
This doesn't make any bit of sense to me.
I hate agreeing with you
Because that is not what's been discussed.
Because I believe they are a guilty party too. On a much, much different level, to the point nobody on Earth will be able to punish them.But, you're still placing blame.
The wrong approach in these situations is look to the other way.Why is it so important for you to place blame?
I refer you to my first post on this thread. I have bolded the answer to your question.
No matter how you dress it up, running away from the sort of situations stated in this thread (a man hitting a woman, a man hitting a child, etc) is not the right thing to do. It is the selfish thing to do.
IMO, very few people can say without a shred of doubt, how they would react in such a situation (I include myself in this category of people), but to say that you have to walk away from these situations is coward and selfish. There is no way around it.
When it comes to my family, my daughter especially, I would put my life on the line, as I've stated before.
But, to do it for some random person I have no connection to, I wouldn't do it.
I just don't see where it is written that we have to lay our lives on the line for complete strangers.
Would you feel the same if they call the cops?
At least they would be doing something.
Deep in your heart.
That is the minimum that should be done in such a situation.Would you feel the same if they call the cops?
At least they would be doing something.
Nevertheless, time is of the essence in these situations and calling the cops might not be enough.
But you also said you didn't want her growing up without a father ...
All the more reason that your self-righteous position in this thread seems so overblown and out of place. Your very first comment on the subject includes an acknowledgement that you don't really know how you'd act in the situation, yet you still spend the next several pages asserting that you know, absolutely, the right way to act? Doesn't quite add up.
Yes, I did say that.
But, if you read my post I said that I wasn't willing to orphan my child by intervening in someone else's business.
I've said, and still maintain, that if my family's life is in danger, especially my child, I would put my life on the line.
I've said it over and over again.
Cucking Funt is right. Absolutely no one knows how they will act in a crisis situation until the crisis actually happens. I *think* that if a child were in danger, I'd do anything to stop it. But I have no idea to know if that's true, unless it were to happen. I do know that if I saw anyone in danger, I would call the police though. And I think there are a lot of situations that I would intervene. But who knows.
This is not the same situation, but a long time ago. I found a kid wandering at the mall - a toddler. I took him to the security area and I waited for the parents to arrive. I waited for almost 2 hours. The mom walked in finally and took the kids hand and said, "Oh thanks" and turned to walk away.
I was like .. Oh my gosh, she isn't even worried or caring or anything. So I snatched the kid back. And I said, "That's it? You weren't worried?" and she said, "It's no big deal, he always wanders off. Don't worry about it." Mind you, I was at a mall in Los Angeles.
I went crazy and told her she was an unfit mom. (How the can you not care your baby was missing for 2 hours.) She admitted that she hadn't "noticed" he was gone until 30 minutes ago because she was trying on clothes. A major argument ensued and I refused to give her the kid back - security was holding us apart and there was scuffling.
I told them to call the police because I wanted to file something with child protective services or something. She wanted to charge me with kidnapping. It got ugly and the police came. I filed a report with CPS. It later came out that she left her kids alone at home during the day for hours at a time (2 kids under 5).
But anyway, I am rambling now but I'm glad I didn't mind my own business. I guess that was my point.
I have different but related questions.
Do you step into the middle of two men who are fighting? What is the difference?
What if the woman is the perpetrator and the man is the victim- what about then?
Yes, I'd be pissed off because I am a parent and I'd, as Peewee stated, would give my life for my kids and the fact that there were people around who did not help would piss me off. But what I'm trying to say is that while I may think they should have done something I can't really blame them since I don't know their cir stances. I have no idea how I would react in the face of danger of a split second decision.
I do think that more often than not a person reacts instinctively and doesn't have time to think until afterwards and that is when they themselves may go into shock and say to themselves, "what the was I thinking!? I could have died!?!?".
Just like the Petty Officer who won the Medal of Honor for jumping on a grenade to save his comrades even though he had a family back home. His actions were instinctive and make him a true hero.
We simply don't know.
Awesomeness.
Most of you don't even stop to help someone with a flat tire or car trouble, but you're going to put your life on the line for the same people?
Sure.
I have done just that. One of them had a metal wrench too. Of course I was a lot younger then...
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