Oh !!! (6)

[Condemned 2 HelLA]

A pastor entered his donkey in a race and it won. The pastor was so pleased with the donkey that he entered it in the race again, and it won again. The local paper read:

“PASTOR'S ASS OUT FRONT.”
The Bishop was so upset with this kind of publicity that he ordered the pastor not to enter the donkey in another race.

The next day, the local paper headline read:

“BISHOP SCRATCHES PASTOR'S ASS.”

This was too much for the bishop, so he ordered the pastor to get rid of the donkey.

The pastor decided to give it to a nun in a nearby convent.
The local paper, hearing of the news, posted the following headline the next day:

“NUN HAS BEST ASS IN TOWN.”

The bishop fainted.

He informed the nun that she would have to get rid of the donkey, so she sold it to a farmer for $10.
The next day the paper read:

“NUN SELLS ASS FOR $10.”

This was too much for the bishop, so he ordered the nun to buy back the donkey and lead it to the plains where it could run wild. The next day the headlines read:

’NUN ANNOUNCES HER ASS IS WILD AND FREE.”

The bishop was buried the next day.

The moral of the story is....being concerned about public opinion can bring you much grief and misery...and even shorten your life. So be yourself and enjoy life... Stop worrying about everyone else's ass and you'll be a lot happier and live longer!
Have a nice day!

[Johnny_Blaze_47]

A pastor entered his donkey in a race and it won. The pastor was so pleased with the donkey that he entered it in the race again, and it won again. The local paper read:

“PASTOR'S ASS OUT FRONT.”
The Bishop was so upset with this kind of publicity that he ordered the pastor not to enter the donkey in another race.

The next day, the local paper headline read:

“BISHOP SCRATCHES PASTOR'S ASS.”

This was too much for the bishop, so he ordered the pastor to get rid of the donkey.

The pastor decided to give it to a nun in a nearby convent.
The local paper, hearing of the news, posted the following headline the next day:

“NUN HAS BEST ASS IN TOWN.”

The bishop fainted.

The pastor decided to give it to a nun in a nearby convent.
The local paper, hearing of the news, posted the following headline the next day:

“NUN HAS BEST ASS IN TOWN.”

The bishop fainted.

This was too much for the bishop, so he ordered the nun to buy back the donkey and lead it to the plains where it could run wild. The next day the headlines read:

’NUN ANNOUNCES HER ASS IS WILD AND FREE.”

The bishop was buried the next day.

The moral of the story is....being concerned about public opinion can bring you much grief and misery...and even shorten your life. So be yourself and enjoy life... Stop worrying about everyone else's ass and you'll be a lot happier and live longer!
Have a nice day!

That reminds me of a proof sheet my old editor-in-chief at The Star had on the wall of his office.

Before I joined, there had been a story about the Texas State UPD getting Tasers. On the front page, over the fold, was a picture of UPD Chief Ralph Meyer being Tasered as a demonstration.



The original headline with this photo read: Testing the Taser

The proof sheet my friend had on the wall had the headline: Torturing the Elderly

We used to have our Ed Board meetings in his office and no matter how much time passed, I couldn't look at that proof sheet without busting up laughing.

[Mr Dio]

I could get you hired. We had open house a few weeks ago because we need reps big time

BTW, what do you do?

Could we work 6 hrs/day, make at least $15/hr, have full med/dental/vision & wear shorts with a pressed shirt?

[Mr Dio]

SB, whom did you drink?

[Silver21_Black20]

SB, whom did you drink?

No one. Why would you ask me that question?

[TheThinkingMan]

That's what you get for thinking.

Nothing wrong with that.

[midgetonadonkey]

My breath smells like tuna. For some reason I find it very erotic.

[Silver21_Black20]

My breath smells like tuna. For some reason I find it very erotic.

Fishy breath...eww...go suck on an altoid.

[midgetonadonkey]

You go suck on an altoid.

[tlongII]

My breath smells like tuna. For some reason I find it very erotic.

Did you eat ashbeeigh?

[ShoogarBear]

tlong goes for the low-hanging fruit on that one.

[midgetonadonkey]

Ashbeeigh probably smells more like dead animal down there than tuna.

[LaMarcus Bryant]

thats not a pleasant picture

[midgetonadonkey]

Would you eat out ashbeeigh LMB?

[ShoogarBear]

Ashbeeigh probably smells more like dead animal down there than tuna.

Filet Mignon?

[midgetonadonkey]

More like decomposed skunk.

[sa_butta]

More like decomposed skunk.

hence the name stink-box.

[LaMarcus Bryant]

yeah

[tlongII]

Midge vs LMB is a Celebrity Death Match to see who gets to eat Ashbeeigh.


Who would win?

[LaMarcus Bryant]

well if it was an eating match, probably midge
dont forget he once went at a chick with 12 inch labia

[ORION]

well if it was an eating match, probably midge
dont forget he once went at a chick with 12 inch labia

I heard he used it as a speed bag until he knocked it clean off her crotch

[midgetonadonkey]

haha 12 inch labia

I forgot about that

[LaMarcus Bryant]

how could you possibly forget that

[midgetonadonkey]

When you've been with as many ed up chicks as I have, a 12 inch labia slips your mind.

[sa_butta]

When you've been with as many ed up chicks as I have, a 12 inch labia slips your mind.

I hate to ask, but what would be your most memorable?