Dear Brendan,
First off, let me say that it's been a delight to watch you play as a Maverick. You've been everything this team needs in the paint - tough, strong, and athletic. You can actually catch a basketball, which immediately makes you light years better than the vagina we've had playing center here the the past half-decade.
But there's something that concerns me. You haven't been on the court lately. The reports are of "lower back tightness" which I understand probably isn't too comfortable an affliction to have. However, I wonder if it means you need to be missing work. I'm pretty sure lower back tightness is something that many Americans deal with every day, and nobody calls in sick because of it.
I don't mean to belittle you, I just want to say this - skipping games because of "lower back tightness" might have flown in Washington, but this is Dallas. This is the Western Conference. You're playing with the big boys now. Time to put on those big boy pants.
Sack up.
Love,
monosylab1k