Stupid people at work

[DUNCANownsKOBE]

[The Reckoning]

it doesnt matter how late you are so long as you stay that amount of time after everyone leaves...or dont take a lunch break.


at my last job i had a cubicle next to the gossip ladies who would leave their doors open. theyd constantly talk about everyone in the office. one of them left their stereo on all the time and then quit when people finally complained .

every time theyd answer their phone, theyd be really sweet and patient and then when theyd hang up theyd utter "asshole."

or when someone would get done talking to them and leave their office, theyd say "i really ing hate that guy."

makes me wonder what happens after i talk to people, tbh.

then another guy would come up to me and always say "enjoy college because your life is over when you get a real job. life sucks."

i was about to graduate too


...remind me to never get a job for the government.

[Viva Las Espuelas]

it doesnt matter how late you are so long as you stay that amount of time after everyone leaves...or dont take a lunch break.


at my last job i had a cubicle next to the gossip ladies who would leave their doors open. theyd constantly talk about everyone in the office. one of them left their stereo on all the time and then quit when people finally complained .

every time theyd answer their phone, theyd be really sweet and patient and then when theyd hang up theyd utter "asshole."

or when someone would get done talking to them and leave their office, theyd say "i really ing hate that guy."

makes me wonder what happens after i talk to people, tbh.

then another guy would come up to me and always say "enjoy college because your life is over when you get a real job. life sucks."

i was about to graduate too


...remind me to never get a job for the government.

And never sell your hair to a wig shop

[DUNCANownsKOBE]

don't attend your own funeral as a guy named Phil Shifley

[DMC]

Avoid cubicle jobs.

I worked with a Mexican guy who didn't know how a thermos worked. I asked him one day " so your thermos keeps your hot soup hot and your cold drinks cold, how does it know whether you want the food hot or cold?" he just gave me a crosseyed blank stare. Later he approached me and said he'd been thinking about it all day and it was bothering him and he wanted to know.

[I. Hustle]

avoid cubicle jobs.

I worked with a mexican guy who didn't know how a thermos worked. I asked him one day " so your thermos keeps your hot soup hot and your cold drinks cold, how does it know whether you want the food hot or cold?" he just gave me a crosseyed blank stare. Later he approached me and said he'd been thinking about it all day and it was bothering him and he wanted to know.

lol

[Viva Las Espuelas]

Mexicans

[Sportcamper]

Henny Youngman told that thermos joke 40 years ago…Never gets old…

[Oh, Gee!!]

take my wife, please!

[Drachen]

And never sell your hair to a wig shop

Don't have a grandson with a dog collar.

[Jacob1983]

Got another one to add to the list. This is more about being lazy than being stupid. That same co-worker was so damn lazy that they gave a certain key to a boss to give to me. I was on the other side of the warehouse so this lazy dumbass co-worker didn't want to walk all the way ot the other side to give me a key to one of the doors in the back. I've called this piece of out before on not making bales and not operating the heavy machinery in the back. We are the in the same department and have the same job le yet this co-worker is not required to operate heavy machinery or make bales. You have any piece of co-workers like that at your work? You have the same job le yet you are required to do more work than the other even though you are both suppose to be able to do those tasks. I'm not ing about operating heavy machinery or making bales. I'm ing about a co-worker not pulling that fair share of the workload. I've already ed to my bosses about this and they basically told me to shut the up. It was either shut the up, only work 2 or 3 days or get fired.


I also hate it how co-workers and bosses are oblivious and ignorant when it comes to the walkie talkies. For example, a co-worker named Billy Bob can say something on the walkie talkie, and 10 minutes later, a boss or co-worker will call for that person and if that person doesn't respond on the 1st or 2nd call, you will hear "Billy Bob, do you have a walkie talkie? or "Billy Bob, are you on walkie". Pay attention to your damn in walkie talkie, dumbasses. And then we have bosses asking if so and so has left or telling us to go tell so and so to punch out for a lunch. I just want to say on my walkie talkie when they tell me to go to tell someone to clock out or punch out for lunch "worry about your own ".

[Avante]

I once worked at a cannery, my job was to print whatever on the side of boxes as they came off a line. I ran out of ink so the line was down while I changed ink. So here comes the foreman..

foreman...why is this line down, is something broke? Do we need a mechanic?
me...no.
foreman...ok then let's go.
me...well I need to...
foreman...I said ..LET'S GO!!!!!!!
me...ok (so I started things up)

Here comes boxes with nothing on them.

foreman...HOLD IT! STOP! where's the print?
me...we were down because I ran out of ink.
foreman...oh. Well hurry up. (then he walked away)

I was just out of high school, young and well young.

[benefactor]

There is a love triangle of dumbasses at my work.

It started with this guy named Mike. Mike is 40 something year old man who acts like he is still 21. He's had sex with countless women there, but none of them would be considered any type of real impressive trophy. Almost all of them were just insecure and attention starved. The funny thing is he's married three of them. He was married when he started working there. He immediately started cheating on his wife with one of his co-workers. He leaves his wife and marries the girl he works with. Then he goes to a party one night at a co-workers house and has sex with one of his other co-workers in the swimming pool. They hook up, he leaves the girl he married and starts dating the girl he ed in the pool. They get married. It isn't long until a new girl gets hired on and he starts sleeping with her. New girl lets it go on for a while but cuts him off after her guilty conscience gets the best of her. His current wife knows whats going on but is too insecure to leave him.

Fast forward a few months. Another new nurse gets hired. She is 20 years younger than him and has the relationship skills of a seventh grader. He moves in on her and they start sleeping together. He makes it clear to his current wife that he's out the door and divorces her. The new girl he is sleeping with is also married(less than a year) so she leaves her husband too. And you guessed it...they get married...even though the most recent girl has been told the whole relationship history of him at that job.

It gets better. He tattooed the name of the second woman he married on his arm. When he married the third girl, he went and got a cover up done...and got matching tattoos with her. I'm guessing anther cover up will be in order when he finds a new woman to marry. He recently started working out too. Now he wears shirts that are four sizes too small and walks around like he's pinning down a couple of cantaloupes under his arms. The new woman is also talking about having kids with him.

[ploto]

There is a love triangle of dumbasses at my work.

It started with this guy named Mike. Mike is 40 something year old man who acts like he is still 21. He's had sex with countless women there, but none of them would be considered any type of real impressive trophy. Almost all of them were just insecure and attention starved. The funny thing is he's married three of them. He was married when he started working there. He immediately started cheating on his wife with one of his co-workers. He leaves his wife and marries the girl he works with. Then he goes to a party one night at a co-workers house and has sex with one of his other co-workers in the swimming pool. They hook up, he leaves the girl he married and starts dating the girl he ed in the pool. They get married. It isn't long until a new girl gets hired on and he starts sleeping with her. New girl lets it go on for a while but cuts him off after her guilty conscience gets the best of her. His current wife knows whats going on but is too insecure to leave him.

Fast forward a few months. Another new nurse gets hired. She is 20 years younger than him and has the relationship skills of a seventh grader. He moves in on her and they start sleeping together. He makes it clear to his current wife that he's out the door and divorces her. The new girl he is sleeping with is also married(less than a year) so she leaves her husband too. And you guessed it...they get married...even though the most recent girl has been told the whole relationship history of him at that job.

It gets better. He tattooed the name of the second woman he married on his arm. When he married the third girl, he went and got a cover up done...and got matching tattoos with her. I'm guessing anther cover up will be in order when he finds a new woman to marry. He recently started working out too. Now he wears shirts that are four sizes too small and walks around like he's pinning down a couple of cantaloupes under his arms. The new woman is also talking about having kids with him.

Definitely, the medical field. What it is about hospitals, I just do not know.

[DMC]

Definitely, the medical field. What it is about hospitals, I just do not know.

All those beds.

[DMC]

Henny Youngman told that thermos joke 40 years ago…Never gets old…

My co-worker looked at me and said "dude, you're just wrong".

[I. Hustle]

Today's story:

"Yeah... I just got back from seeing my doctor again. (Quintessential tears) He says I have to get a biopsy done. He needs to check to see if I have diabetes in my kindeys. If I do then I have to start the dialysis."

[SpurinDallas]

Today's story:

"Yeah... I just got back from seeing my doctor again. (Quintessential tears) He says I have to get a biopsy done. He needs to check to see if I have diabetes in my kindeys. If I do then I have to start the dialysis."

She didn't start her sentence with "Ayeee..."??

[I. Hustle]

She didn't start her sentence with "Ayeee..."??

lol she did. I just didn't think people would believe me.

[SpurinDallas]

lol she did. I just didn't think people would believe me.

One of the few downsides to working from home for me is not getting to experience the same kind of idiots I used to a long time ago. Keep the stories coming.

[johnsmith]

A few years back I had to set up an order for a customer. It's at a jobsite and there wasn't a physical address yet, so on the order where it asks for an address I wrote, 123 Fake St. NotATown USA, and down in the notes field I wrote to contact the customer prior to shipment.

Yes, they attempted to deliver to 123 Fake St. shortly thereafter. My company had to idiot proof the address field after that.

My response when asked about it, "if you have an employee that will try to ship to that address, you should fire that employee".

[DMC]

Coworker ing about management some years ago: " them, they don't know anything, all they have is information from the past and present"

This is the same guy who, while giving a "lecture" on threshold limit values, coined the phrase "metric threes" when he saw the M^3 symbol.

[Viva Las Espuelas]

There is a love triangle of dumbasses at my work.

It started with this guy named Mike. Mike is 40 something year old man who acts like he is still 21. He's had sex with countless women there, but none of them would be considered any type of real impressive trophy. Almost all of them were just insecure and attention starved. The funny thing is he's married three of them. He was married when he started working there. He immediately started cheating on his wife with one of his co-workers. He leaves his wife and marries the girl he works with. Then he goes to a party one night at a co-workers house and has sex with one of his other co-workers in the swimming pool. They hook up, he leaves the girl he married and starts dating the girl he ed in the pool. They get married. It isn't long until a new girl gets hired on and he starts sleeping with her. New girl lets it go on for a while but cuts him off after her guilty conscience gets the best of her. His current wife knows whats going on but is too insecure to leave him.

Fast forward a few months. Another new nurse gets hired. She is 20 years younger than him and has the relationship skills of a seventh grader. He moves in on her and they start sleeping together. He makes it clear to his current wife that he's out the door and divorces her. The new girl he is sleeping with is also married(less than a year) so she leaves her husband too. And you guessed it...they get married...even though the most recent girl has been told the whole relationship history of him at that job.

It gets better. He tattooed the name of the second woman he married on his arm. When he married the third girl, he went and got a cover up done...and got matching tattoos with her. I'm guessing anther cover up will be in order when he finds a new woman to marry. He recently started working out too. Now he wears shirts that are four sizes too small and walks around like he's pinning down a couple of cantaloupes under his arms. The new woman is also talking about having kids with him.

wow. that's crazy. i've worked at the same place for the past 10+ years and there's plenty of stories of hanky panky. one guy who was married, been with the company for a few years, started banging this new chick and just got careless with it. he started banging her in his office during lunch. they were emailing each other using the company's email app. she was into bondage and all that and would send pretty provocative pics to his work email. they busted him. fired him and he fessed up to his wife. they divorced once it was known he knocked up the other chick. they're happily married now and he's lost about half of the hair he had when he left.

the merchandising manager started carrying on with one gal in the accounting department that was about 15 years younger than him. she was nothing to write home about. he was married and had a kid. i think it was the day after new year's, his wife literally called everyone in the company and left a good 5 to 8 minute voicemail, screaming at the top of her lungs how "that !!!" is breaking up their home, he's got a small , yada yada. she called and just started dialing correct extensions and just went down the line. it was crazy. everyone had a different account of it because she had something new to say on every voicemail she left. they eventually divorced. he was let go later on, they still continued seeing each other and i think i heard they got married last year.

[Viva Las Espuelas]

Married co-worker: "Congrats!"

Married newly impregnated co-worker that aborted his kid a few years ago when things got careless: "Thanks"

[benefactor]

Forty-something Mike is now transferring out to the IT department. His new twenty-something wife has vowed that Mike will never do to her what he did to his other wives...so I guess he figured he needed to get out from under her supervision so he can around. The general over/under set by most of the employees is three months.

He is also going back to college to finish up his degree. I heard his wife saying that she took out a credit card to pay for it for him. I am seriously appalled at how stupid she is, because clinically she is very intelligent. One of the best nurses at our hospital.