The Land of the Free

[batman2883]

I hop into the corner store down the block from us to pick up a drink. When I open the door, I hear a Middle Eastern accented voice yelling "He punched me! He punched me!"

I look to the back of the store to see a Middle Eastern guy and a 60-65 year old black guy at the ATM machine. I get closer to investigate further, as it is only us three and a worker in the store.

When I get back there, the Middle Eastern guy is still saying the old guy tried to punch him and is now talking to the store worker in some Middle Eastern language. The old guy is saying that he didn't try to punch him -- that he just jumped when he got bumped into while he was taking money out of the ATM.

This is about the time that I take a closer look at the Middle Eastern guy. He's dressed in tight pink button up shirt and white pants. He's obviously gay -- complete with the limp wrist action, the feminine voice (with his foreign accent and a lisp on top of it) and I think he was also wearing makeup if I'm not mistaken.

The gay Middle Eastern guy continues to talk in his foreign language to the store worker and starts to walk away. He gets about ten steps from the door and yells:

"YOU'RE A SLAVE ######, YOU'RE A ING SLAVE. I HATE ALL YOU ######S."

Which with his lisp and accent came out more like:

"OOZA THLAVE ######, OOZA FOOCKING THLAVE. I HATE OLU ######TH."

I turn around to look at him and he literally sprints out the door with his wrists elevated, hops into his beat up car with a rainbow sticker and drives away within about 10 seconds.

At this point, I just start laughing due to the irony of it all. A gay, Middle Eastern flamer with a lisp is going to talk mess and then run? Classic on so many levels.

The old man walks by me and says "He's right, I am a slave" to which I responded "Aren't we all".

I pay for my drink and then leave.

IVE BEEN TELLING EVERYONE IM A SLAVE AND NOBODY BELIEVES ME

[jman3000]

My only experience with that S consisted of the owner getting mad at me for getting some ice from the soda dispenser without buying a ing soda. I was in the middle of a jog and was ing tired.

[Shelly]

Maybe, but in your 'hood, it was probably some divorce gone bad with somebody hiring an expensive hitman to do the deed.

Actually, some 20somethings were renting the house. They had a party and someone got shot and they dumped the body in Medina county. Then a few months later, someone had a guilty conscious and finally called the police. I remember we were walking one night and all these Texas Rangers had the house swarmed.

The house has been for sale for almost a year. I wonder why it hasn't sold...